[Jack Quinn]

MidWeek Mayhem Alaskan Massacre
Live! From Juneau, Alaska
June 27, 2018

OOWF Intercontinental Title Match - Onslaught Rules
Bridget O'Malley vs. Zed

OOWF Onslaught Championship Match
Shannon Mann vs. Jack Bullet

Steel Cage Match
Firewoman vs. Mai Muyo

ECW Style Triple Threat Match - Non Title
Mac Flasher vs. Stank vs. Kylie Mignolio

Weapons On a Poll Match
Banned From Everywhere vs. Beer Money

Black Cat Match - Loser Gets Ten Lashes
Ghosthead vs. Shizuru-mume Maguniku-Cox

The Darlings vs. Saints of Sinners



Card subject to global warming

[Jack Quinn]

<cut to the Destroyitarium and we see the rest of the Saints standing around a heavily bandaged Sizzle. Sizzle starts to stand, and can barely stand up straight. He hobbles over to the bar>

Siz: TONY! Sizzle need strongest drink!

<Tony hands Sizzle a Long Island Ice Tea with Everclear, Sizzle downs it in one drink. Tony turns around and heads to the closet where they keep the mop and bucket>

Siz: 13, Siz needs to say something

<13 grabs a mic and walks over to Sizzle>

13: This is 13, I am here with OOWF Legend, and member of the New Orleans Saints of Sinners, Shizuru-mume Maguniku-Cox. Shizuru, there are rumors that you have something to say?

Siz: <taking the mic> HEAD OF GHOST! You have DISHONORED yourself! Sizzle beat you, AGAIN, fair and square, and like coward, you dishonor yourself by attacking Sizzle from BEHIND! NO ONE HURTS SIZZLE! Head of Ghost, you must pay, at Massacred Alaska Sizzle challenges Head of Ghost to BLACK CAT match! But that not all! The loser, which will be you, gets TEN LASHES FOR BEING DISHONORABLE after match! Head of Ghost, at Massacred Alaska Sizzle is going to end you, and take Sha-na-nanon as BRIDE!

MHJ: You're challenging him to what?

Siz: Siz going to end Head of Ghost......why is room spinny?

MHJ: You know what? It's a great idea! Kill him and take Shannon!

<Moose slaps Sizzle on the back and he immediately doubles over and starts vomiting before we hear him thud to the floor>

MHJ: TONY!

<Jack walks over to the rest of the Saints>

Sta: You are aware that my brother will absolutely accept this match and murder Sizzle

MHJ: Yep

MF: Should we stop him?

<Fulton looks at his tag partner and they both burst into laughter>

SF: The boy has to learn

<the Saints nod and we fade to black>

[DrMcAwesome]

*an INVISIBLE NINJA CAMERA finds MOOSEHEAD JACK entering The Destroyitarium when he finds a familiar shadowy figure sitting at the bar. While MOOSE instantly recognizes the person at the bar, he’s more confused than anything as to why that person is there. The CAMERA spins its focus to reveal MAC FLASHER drinking a Henry’s Hard Cherry Cola with almost zero concern about MOOSE’s growing annoyance*

MOOSEHEAD JACK: “Got some balls on you, I’ll give you that. But that brain of yours could use some work.”

MAC: “What makes you say this?”

MHJ: “That suspension only applies to Eco. I could beat you within an inch of your life and leave the rest to nature for having the audacity to sit at MY BAR and drink MY BOOZE in front of me.”

MF: “But you won’t.”

MHJ: “Excuse me?”

MF: “You won’t.”

MHJ: “How many of those have you had? How did you even know that we had those? They discontinued that stuff in January. For fuck’s sake, when did you start drinking?”

MF: “Jesus. You’re just like Bridget with the questions. But, I lost count about 20 minutes ago. These things can get you in trouble in a hurry. Your protege, Sizzlechest, spilled the beans on this stash while babbling something about 13 having her ways. And the heavy drinking hasn’t started yet, but give me some time, and I can be just as good as you.”

MHJ: “That still doesn’t explain why you’re here. What makes you think that I’ll let you walk out of here without medical assistance.”

MF: “We’re too much alike.”

*MOOSE nearly stumbles off his stool in shock*

MF: “I know. It’s shocking to me as well. But it makes a lot of sense.”

MHJ: “So, let me guess. You want to be a Saint?”

MF: “To the contrary. Not saying that I haven’t considered it, because the 4-on-1 beatdowns I take from the Saints of Sinners might slow down a bit if I’m on your side, but there are some things … Associates, if you will, that force my hand a bit.”

MHJ: “What makes you think that we’re in any way similar? Is this just a cry session because you were picked on as a kid? That’s for Dr. Dre Gaines to hear, not me.”

MF: “You wish it were that easy. I do, too. Simply put, you’re not the only one in OOWF waging wars with his head. Neither am I, but I’m the only one fighting what goes on in my head.”

MHJ: “Says the guy with the title that anyone would kill to have.”

MF: “See … This is what I thought, too. I spent my entire time in OOWF trying to get that title. To be the guy on top of this place. The validation that someone could do things the right way and grab that brass ring. Then February 28 happens. I finally slay the dragon. I keep Stank’s shoulders down. Baton Rouge is the site of my greatest triumph. The ‘happily ever after’ that I was striving for since Day 1. I mean, what else would I need? Then … March 1. I wake up feeling the same as I did the day before, but now I have a 16-pound golden target draped on my left shoulder. Basically covering my heart. Fitting in a way, seeing as it’s rarely open for anyone to access. If we’re being honest, I was happier that Bridget won the Intercontinental Championship than I was for my own win. She was ecstatic while I was worried about when the strain of being OOWF World Champion would overcome me, given all the other anxieties and funks I deal with … I figured that it wouldn’t be long, but somehow I’ve exceeded my meager expectations.”

*MAC takes a sip and sighs before continuing*

MF: “So this whole time. Week to week, I’m wondering what the hell is wrong with me? I have the championship. I have the girl …”

*MOOSE clears his throat*

MF: “… Fair enough. I have a girl. I’m in the greatest fucking wrestling company in the world, potentially the galaxy, and I wake up each day with either some new worry or this same feeling of hopelessness that has been at my side longer than really any non-relative that I know. But, because I’m Mac Flasher, I have to carry myself as if nothing is wrong and that I’m living this dream life so that a kid who is dealing with the same stuff that I am can lose that feeling for a few hours and live through whatever it is I can accomplish on Wednesdays.”

MHJ: “…”

MF: “Again. We’re too much alike. Sure, you think you’re escaping yourself when you do what you do, but you’re still Moosehead Jack at the end of the day. You’re still trying to escape yourself through your actions and finding that you can’t. So you become those darkest thoughts in your head to pacify your brain and blame it on ‘Irish shit.’”

MHJ: “…”

MF: “I get it. It’s a lot to take in. It’s a lot to keep in, as well. And I’ll be honest. This potential war is not my bag, but I have to fight the valiant battle, so that’s going to be a possible hastening of my demise.”

MHJ: “What makes you think that Eco is the valiant one in all of this?”

MF: “I don’t think that at all. But your group’s association with a former friend of mine prevents me from taking a different side than the one I’m on. You know, for the sake of appearances. In a different scenario with personnel, maybe I jump onto this ship and we wind up destroying all threats to our physical selves while never quite getting ahead in our emotional battles; or getting along for that matter. After all, you’re likely the only one here who understands this suffering. Misery is not exactly the battle cry of a team with Awesome Bill from Dawsonville and Justin Sane on it.”

MHJ (rubbing his chin): “Are you looking for some non-violence pact? Something that keeps you safe through all of this?”

MF: “No. What I want is an understanding that when we do clash, that we’re not enemies fighting this great war because we disagree on philosophies on OOWF or whether or not you should send your kids to private school; but we’re simply two people looking to quell a similar pain. Linking back to what Dr. Gaines said: Through this war, I’ll find my peace. Maybe that means that I can find a pain greater than mine to quash these feelings. Maybe you can, too.”

*MAC stands up and stretches*

MF: “But I should get going before Sizzlechest gets back, wouldn’t want my blood on his hands with all he’s learning here. Give a few brain cells to what I said instead of that scotch, though.”

*MAC drops a $20 on the table for the bar staff, pats MOOSE on the shoulder and exits The Destroyitarium while MOOSE slides an ice cube around in his scotch glass as the scene fades*

[Jack Quinn]

<cut to the Nowhere Bar, Grille & PCPL Repository. Justin, Bill and Ellie May are about to cut a promo when Arctic McBearington steps into the frame and politely takes the mic>

AMB: <in a somewhat British voice> It occurred to me that the anniversary of my expulsion is upon me. I was torn from my family and exiled to the wilderness to face fates unknown. I was but a young cub at the time and I wandered the desolate Alaskan wilderness in search of food. When I approached the boundaries of another's territory, I was violently rebuked and told to go back from whence I came. Many years have passed since my exile, and I have found new family in Bill, Justin and Ellie May. This is why I call upon you, Skaay, Cumshewa and Guujaaw to face me and my brothers in a fight. Those who capitulate will be exiled to the frozen corners of Alaska, never to be seen again.

<Arctic hands the mic back to Ellie May. The three of them are staring slack jawed (more then usual for Bill>

ABFD: Did that ol boy challenge polar bears to a street fight?

JS: Sure sounded like it

ABFD: HELL YEAH SON! WE'S GONNA WHUP US SOME POLARY BEAR ASS! HELL YEAH! COME GET SOME!

EMFE: <turning to go after Arctic> Arctic......do you REALLY think this is a good idea?

JS: Huh, guess we should talk about our match against Beer Money

ABFD: Hell son, them ol boys Skids and Smudge done knowifiy what it's like to mess with us! Them ol boys is in more trouble than a woodpecker in a cave!

JS: It's a four corners weapons match

ABFD: Uhhhhhh.........rememberify me on what them chere words done meanify

JS: It means there is a box with a weapon on a pole in all four corners

ABFD: They's weapons in a box what floatify above the corners o'tha ring?

JS: Sort of

ABFD: Hows we supposed to get them chere weapons to use to wear out ol Skids and Smudge?

JS: Climb a pole

ABFD: That's all?

JS: Yep

ABFD: See, ol Bill done thoughtified that them chere boxes was a floatin in the air. And ol Bill though, damn son, floatin up to a box would be harder'n givin a mosquito a circumcision! But hell, ol Bill done wonified the Dawson Counto Pole climbin contest!

JS: Pole climbing contest?

ABFD: Yean, whoever can scootify up that chere pole and get the duck sittin on top the fastest, done won him a minced possum pie!

JS: That sounds like fun! We should go!

ABFD: Nuh uh, we's banned from there

JS: We're <mysterious crowd sings along> BANNED FROM EVERYWHERE

ABFD: HOT DAMN SON YOU DONE DIDIFY IT!

<fade as Bill cracks open a mason jar of PCPL>

[Fire-Babe]

OOC: This occurs immediately after Mayhem.

Firewoman is in medical and comes to with the usual flurry of wild punches. The medical staff is used to this by now, so they kept a clear distance...except for the new guy, who gets punched in the jaw. The rest of the staff goes to attend to him, allowing Ecosystem to sneak in.

Eco: Oh good, you're awake.

FW: Uh huh.

Eco: Good news, Danny put you into a Steel Cage match, to keep down the outside interferences.

FW: But no one interfered.

Eco: Well, not during the match. But Moose--

FW: He came down after, didn't he. *Eco nods* What did he do?

Eco: He was able to convince Mai to release the hold on you after you went unconscious.

Fire props herself up on her pillows.

FW: Classic. You see what he's doing right? He's getting her to trust him. Won't be long now.

Eco: For what?

FW: Oh please...you have to recognize this play book. Get your enemy to trust you, and then draw them further and further into your web? Sound like anyone you know?

Eco:.....Me. I do that.

FW: Did that. You aren't that person anymore.

Ecosystem nods. Fire studies him, and then seems to think for a bit.

FW: Are you on the card?

Eco: What, me? Nooooo......

FW: Why.

Eco: Well, my shoulder, you know....er, elbow.....er--

FW: Juni.

Eco: Hm?

FW: I am not exactly known for my patience.

Eco: An understatement.

FW: I'm laying here in medical while you sit there all comfortable.

Eco: I have pain in my knee--

FW: Shut up. You do not. Look...I know you want to work <df>"smarter, not harder"</df> but you need to ask yourself...is it REALLY smart to antagonize me?

Eco: But Moose--

FW: If you don't get in that ring and fight for YOUR COMPANY, and fight soon, you will have TWO Quinns on your ass, and I don't like your odds.

Eco: ...

FW: ...

Eco: Well, I will check with my private physician and--

Stank appears at the door.

S: Okay, my turn. Make yourself scarce, Juni.

Eco: Not a problem. She's all yours.

S: Yes she is.

Eco: For now.

FW: Huh?

Eco: Oh right, you were unconscious...walking out the door...your ex is here.

FW: Jericho?

S: No, the other one.

FADE

[Jack Quinn]

<Moose picks up the full glass of scotch and dumps it in the sink. He then heads to his room for some of his private stash, and now, the only kind he drinks, at least until his advanced supply is gone and it starts hitting distribution centers across the world.>

Moosehead Jack's "Trust Me" Irish Whiskey 151 proof

<Moose comes back to the bar and opens the bottle and drinks deeply>

MHJ: Fuck Juni, Fuck Alex.

<Moose takes another long drink and lights a cigar and we fade to black>

[DevSop]

*Mendenhall Glacier*

The camera fades in to a scenic overlook of Juneau's famous Mendenhall Glacier and we see two figures traveling along a walking path. In between the two figures is a very large wolf. As the camera zooms in we see the Darling twins taking in the sights. They feel the presence of the camera and Alexander smirks.

Alex: It's been a while since I felt that nagging presence watching every move I make, but it was time. Lexie and I have been biding our time and weighing our options if this was the right move for us and we're actually not sure, but it is the decision we made because we felt like we had unfinished business on multiple levels. And because if and when we leave this business, it'll be on our terms. It'll be our decision. And it's time to make sure that everyone understands a few things. We've been in this business for a long time. We've been in this company for almost as long. We've done pretty much everything that can be expected of people in this business. Won titles. Competed all over the world against the very best that's ever stepped foot into a wrestling ring. Made friends. Made enemies. Created unbreakable bonds. Had those bonds broken by betrayals on both ends. It's been a tough road. And since we've started, people have been trying to break us and take away this passion we have.

From Poe's revenge to Moosehead Jack's vendetta. From Matt Folz jealousy to Stank's redemption from Run DEA. To Christian Carter's need to be a part of something bigger and Ghosthead's work towards fate and destiny. They're all tried to take care of the Darlings with varying methods and success. But the truth is all have failed because here we stand. So, here we have come back to where all our enemies are congregated. And we do it for no reason other than we want to be here.

Because what all those people have in common is they all made a fatal mistake. They didn't end the Darlings reign. They didn't break us down root and stem. They left us alive and breathing and capable. That was their mistake. We are the wolves, like good Stark here. And when you leave a wolf alive, the sheep will never be safe. I want this company to understand this, we are not here for anyone's benefit but our own. I want everyone to know that the Darlings remember. The OOWF needs to know that the Darlings are coming for the OOWF.

And may god have mercy on those in our way.

*Fade*

[snelson66]

FADE back in on the Destroyitarium and a TV playing Alexander Darling’s promo. A meaty hand reaches out with a remote and turns the TV off. PAN BACK to reveal the OOWF World Tag Team Champions, Matt Folz and Stan Fulton. Fulton places the remote on the TV stand while Folz picks up two bottles of water and hands one to Fulton. They turn towards the camera. 13 holds a microphone so their conversation can be heard.

MF: “Welcome back, Alex. Alexis.”

SF: “Nice promo. Swooping panoramas. A large animal hired from the local animal wrangler.”

MF: “Or really, really good CGI.”

SF: “Never considered that. Good point.”

MF: “The heavy-handed warnings about how you’re the best this company has seen and everyone needs to get out of your way, and blah blah blah.”

SF: “See, Alex, that’s the thing. We know you’re one of the best. We agree with you there.”

MF: “Completely. Wouldn’t say otherwise.”

SF: “But here’s the thing. We’re all good. You, me, Matt. We’re all Grand Slam champions. We’re all multiple time World Champions. We’re all multiple time Tag Team Champions, et cetera, et cetera.”

MF: “Frankly, you thinking you’re the best there ever was is a healthy thing. We all have to think that or we’d be chewed up and spit out of this company early on.”

SF: “Ego is something we all have in abundance.”

MF: “But here’s the big difference between you and us. We learn to get along with people. We may be a-holes, We’re not, and I quote, "100% a dick".”

13 (whispering, to Fulton): “Do you believe him?”

SF: “Well, I don't know if I believe anyone is 100% a dick...”

MF (interrupting): “Alex is.”

SF: “Touché.”

MF: “Let’s say for the sake of argument, Alex, that you are better than we are. We here don’t believe that, but for the sake of argument.”

SF: “But you’re always going to be on your own now. You’ve managed to alienate every single person in this company. You’ve been... 100% a dick... to so many of us that you have to make this grand claim that you don’t need anyone, you’re going to be doing things for yourself, yadda yadda.”

MF: “We are the Saints of Sinners. We are the preeminent force in wrestling on this planet.”

SF: “Alex, both Matt and myself have had extended programs with you and, though we know you’ll claim total victory, we all know each of us got the better of you during parts of those programs. And all respect due to Alexis, but she’s not in our league.”

MF: “Oh, one last quick suggestion, Alex. Stay away from Fire. You really don’t want a pissed-off Stank hunting you. You’ve already put yourself in our business.”

SF: “And Moose wants to disembowel you and roast your spleen over a campfire.”

MF: “And none of Stan’s meditation is going to solve that one.”

SF: “Uh... no. Even I don’t have that much patience.”

MF (as an aside): “So what was that thing earlier with you laughing about Sizzle getting beat up. That’s not your style.”

SF (also as an aside): “That wasn’t me. I think that was CGI.”

Fulton clears his throat.

SF: “Anywho. Wednesday, Alex, Matt and I will take great pleasure in kicking your and Alexis’s ass around that ring. We will enjoy that immensely. And don’t for a minute think that we’ll be alone.”

MF: “Once a Saint, always a Saint.”

SF: “Enjoy the pain.”

13, Fulton and Folz turn away towards the bar and the microphone can still pick up their voices as they diminish in volume as they walk further away...

MF: “You pulled that ol’ chestnut out of mothballs.”

SF: “Yeah, I can’t exactly use, ‘Walk as if you are kissing the Earth with your feet’ anymore. Fall back on what works I suppose. Not our best promo. Very disjointed... like we were distracted all the time while writing it... Ohai Kay...”

FADE

[The Jewish Cunthead]

Fade in to the palatial Beer Money rec room, where we find SYB and Skurge uh, reccing …

SYB: *rec rec rec*

Skurge: Yes, that.

* The Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth walks in.

TLATDM: Ok, enough reccing. You two idiots have a match at MidWeek Mayhem Alaskan Massacre Live! From Juneau, Alaska June 27, 2018

SYB: We suuuuure do.

TLATDM: So how are you going to prepare for your Weapons on a Pole match?

Skurge: Poll.

TLATDM: That’s what I said.

Skurge: No, you said “Pole”.

SYB: I heard “Pole”, too!

TLATDM: <sighs> No wonder our matches aren’t written out. THIS is what you give them to work with? (looks around) What is this, a fucking pun house?

Skurge: Look, we can only go by what’s on the card, eh? We’re having a Weapons on a Poll match at MidWeek Mayhem Alaskan Massacre Live! From Juneau, Alaska June 27, 2018, so that’s what we’re prepping for.

TLATDM: How do we do that?

SYB: Simple. We get a bunch of weapons and we pick the best one. And I have just the study materials to help us oot.

*SYB whips out his laptop and presses play.



* FADE

[Jack Quinn]

<cut to the Destroyitarium, Moose is sitting there silently smoking a cigar and drinking whiskey. Tony is off doing whatever it is Tony does. 13 walks in and sits next to Moose, we can see their conversation in the mirror>

13: What's wrong?

MHJ: Nothing

13: That's clearly not true. Darling?

MHJ: Part of it, but I knew he would eventually come back, it was inevitable.....we have to finish this. But that's not it

13: Then what?

MHJ: Juni is right

13: Juni is RIGHT?

MHJ: He's got me. There's nothing I can do. I can't touch him, or I risk permanent suspension, and with me on the sideline able to do nothing, Fire is working with that Ross idiot to get Juni reinstated

13: The Saints could turn him into a grease spot

MHJ: No, we can't. He would just use that as a reason to stay out of the ring longer. He's healthy NOW, but he has the final say, not attacking him means he has nothing to use against us

13: Do you think Fire will get him back into the ring?

MHJ: At this point I have no fucking idea what Fire would do. I am surprised she's not a travel companion to him

13: Well, Stank wouldn't approve of that

MHJ: No, he wouldn't.

13: So what are you going to do?

MHJ: <taking a long drink of "Trust Me" and puffing his cigar> Well.......unless Juni changes his tune pretty quick I think I am just going to attack him and beat the hell out of him

13: And risk permanent suspension?

MHJ: Yep

13: I don't know that that's a good idea

MHJ: Honestly it all depends on what the current CEO thinks. Is a permanent suspension worth it when it means throwing away a huge money making feud? See, that's another thing, Juni claims to want what's best for the company, and he knows the bottom line is money. The people, idiots though they may be, WANT this. This has been building for fourteen years, but one thing you can say about Eco, he's a coward. He will hide behind this suspension and run away rather than face a creation of his own doing. If the CEO also wants what's right for the OOWF, he won't suspend me permanently, he'll lift it and force Eco back, and let the money roll in

13: that's possible, it's a big risk though you know the CEO doesn't like you. What about Alex?

MHJ: <drinking and smoking again> I'll deal with him when the time comes

<they sit in silence as we fade>

[Sportsguy]

We fade in and see The Saints (Matt, Stan, Moose, Mai, Stank, 13 and Jaime) all leaving for a group outing to Jurassic World:Fallen Kingdom. As they round the Hallway of Random Encounters they just happen to pass by Ecosystem. Eco reaches out for his sister.

Eco: Mai, just talk to me please.

Mai walks by without even a glance at her brother. As Matt Folz passes by, Eco grabs him by the shoulder and turns him around. Matt holds up a hand to tell the other Saints to back off.

Eco: YOU. You caused this, you turned her against me.

Matt sighs, reaches into his pocket and tosses his keys to his wife.

Matt: Good thing we already have seats reserved online. Hon, you Mai and Stan go wait for me by my car. The rest of you, we'll meet you there, grab some concessions for us. I'm just going to have a quick chat.

The Saints walk off, leaving Matt and Eco alone. Matt nods to Eco's hand still on his shoulder.

Matt: Careful here, this doesn't lead to good consequences for either of us. If I attack you I get your blood all over my shirt, I have to go all the way back to my suite, take a shower, change and miss the first 20 minutes or so of the movie. And if you attack me, then Danny can easily take that as a sign that you're healthy enough to return to active competition. So why don't you do us both a favor and take your hand off my shoulder, get that look off your face and we can have a conversation like a pair of civilized adults.

Eco sees the logic in this and backs off.

Matt: Thank you. Now, before I address your inaccurate and quite frankly hilarious interpretation of recent events between your sister and I, I actually do have to give you credit for something.

Eco: What?

Matt: Bringing Alex and Alexis back was a damn solid plan. You know that Moose hates them even more than he hates you, you figure that sending them after Stan and I's tag team Championships will distract us, and your last line to Fire on Wednesday RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER FIANCEE...? Brilliant. Truly. And against a group of lesser intelligence than the Saints- which is probably 90-95 percent of this company- it would have worked and gotten the heat completely off you. Sadly for you, it won't quite work. At Hell on Earth Moose will eliminate Alex forever. And then we'll turn our attention back towards you. I truly do commend you for putting forth a great effort, but it is inevitable that the Saints win this war.

Eco: Pride goeth before a fall Matthew.

Matt: In most cases I'd agree with you. But you don't have the numbers nor the talent to match us and you know it. Now, lets get to the main point here. You see what's gone down recently between your sister and myself as "Me turning her against you." I just see it as part of a long time continuing pattern.

Eco: How so?

Matt: You know how much I like referencing the history of this company so you might want to grab a drink or something, this is going to be a somewhat lengthy answer.

You never once when forming Devils or The Awakening or any of the 750 million other stables you created during your time here thought enough of Mai to even think of asking her to join you. Me? I recognized how insanely talented she was and spent weeks behind the scenes to recruit her into the New Guard.

When you were in charge here, how many World Championship Matches did you give Mai? ZERO. Even though she damn well deserved them. When I was World Champion, how many did I INSIST she get? 3.

When Mai was disgusted by your actions after Hell on Earth back in 2013 I actually defended your actions a bit. But still, who consoled her? Jaime and I did.

After youFormed the Awakening and Mai was down, did you bother to pick up the phone and call her to explain yourself? No. And again, who consoled her? Jaime and I did.

Now I'm going to take a breath here to ask you a question. When Jaime and I joined the Saints, that really upset Mai right?

Eco: Of course it did. And it also revealed your true character.

Matt: I don't disagree with that. At the same time though, I never made any secret of hiding my true character. But let me ask you this. When your sister was so upset- at the same time that Jaime and I were constantly saying we wished to remain friends with her- how many times did you try and console her?

Eco: ...

Matt: I thought so. Now when Mai wins the Invitational. Zed, Mac, Kylie, Beverly, Mari Ariana, Chad, Bill, Justin, Zane, Jack Bullet all come out to give her a big hug. Even I at the awards show admitted she was the better wrestler that night. And her loving older brother, the one who should have been more proud of her than anyone else? Crickets.

And then, the cherry on the sundae. You actually inter-fucking-fere in her World Championship Match. Jaime and I? Admittedly not quite in the spirit of friendship but we did send her a bottle of champagne and a note of congratulations. Now you add all that up, and the pattern is quite obvious.

Eco: What pattern is that?

Matt: I've ALWAYS been a better friend to her than you've been a brother. You blame me Stan and Jaime for this? (Matt shakes his head) You need to look in a mirror. Now if you excuse me, I'm treating my friend Mai to a movie.

Matt walks off as we.......FADE.

[Fire-Babe]

Firewoman appears to be getting ready to go out, although not to the movies, given the amount of black and leather she's wearing. It's probably best that we are interrupted in our speculation by her cell phone ringing. She rolls her eyes and looks at what is just a text. She tosses the phone aside and picks up her laptop, and starts Skype. After a moment, Chad Madison appears on the video.

FW: I'm busy.

CM: Too busy for your best friend?

FW: Chad, you are Zane's best friend.

CM: I can be both.

FW: You didn't even say goodbye.

CM: ....well--

FW: Again.

CM: I know....We just hadn't been hanging out that much and ... I did try to find you in your office.

Fire maintains her stern look, until Chad tips his cowboy hat.

CM: Ma'am.

FW: *smiling* Fine....I can't stay mad at you....how's the training center going?

CM: Not bad...got a couple of good prospects. I'll send you their videos when they're ready.

FW: Good. Is that what you called for?

CM: Just to see how you're doing with...everything....you look like you're going somewhere.

FW: Yeah. Lucas went with the Saints to see a movie.

CM: Hm.....so who are you going out with?

FW: That remains to be seen.

CM: Anyone I know?

FW: No, Chad. I am interested in finding a total stranger and having some fantastic...um, conversation.

CM: Okay, I just was thinking you'd be....I dunno--

FW: Chad...stop worrying. I'm fine.

CM: If you were fine, you wouldn't be hanging out with Junichiro Muyo and getting your dressed-to-kill on. Are you taking your m--

FW: I'm going to stop you right there. I'm fine. Everything is fine. OOWF is fine, or it will be once I--

CM: I wouldn't be much of a friend if I didn't point out that when you think you have a plan, you can be a bit stubborn--

ZM: *coming into the frame* A bit?

FW: Hi Zane.

ZM: Whoa, going out tonight? Is there a convent nearby?

CM: I said *I* would talk to her, we don't need to gang up--

FW: You're both sweet to call just to annoy me, but I promise. I've got everything under control.

ZM: Uh huh. *Zane walks away*

CM: Just...if you need anything...back-up or....we are a phone call away.

FW: Thanks, Cowboy. Thank Zane for me, too.

Fire closes her Skype session and logs off her computer. She smiles a bit, and then grabs her leather jacket, and leaves.

[Sportsguy]

We cut to the back and see 13 standing next to The OOWF World Tag Team Champions Matt Folz and Stan Fulton.

13: You two seem to be taking this match personally this week.

Stan: Of course we are. This is the first time I've been in the ring with Alex and Alexis since they tried to end my career. For the longest time I didn't think I COULD come back, you can be sure I haven't forgotten what they did nor have I forgiven them.

Matt: Everyone watching this knows my history with the Darlings. I won't go into every single incident but some quick highlights: Alexis caused the end of my first World Championship reign. Alexis was then part of the attack on my wife. Alex then tried to end MY career by getting involved in a match that didn't have a damn thing to do with him. I could go on with several more examples but you all get the point. Now Stan and I each promised Moose that we'll leave Alex in relatively good shape so Moose can finish him for good at Hell on Earth. However, we made no such promise about Alexis.

Stan: Alexis, enjoy the pain.

FADE

[snelson66]

FADE back in on the Destroyitarium. Matt, Stan and 13 are finishing up their talk while rest of the Saints of Sinners are sitting around a table; Matt, Stan and 13 sit down and they join the others drinking their beverage of choice (Fulton’s is Earl Grey Tea). There’s a knock on the door (seriously?! who knocks on this door?) and Matt gets up and opens it, finding a brown-clothes-clad delivery driver (the sponsorship check hasn’t cleared, guys!).

BCCDD: “Package for Stan Fulton.”

SF: “Yo.”

Fulton signs for the rather large package and carries it in while Matt shuts the door. Fulton sets the box on a table and opens it.

SF: “Presents for you guys.”

MHJ: “What kind of presents?”

S: “I hope it’s not a bunch of meditation crap.”

MF: “Probably Minnesota Vikings paraphernalia. I am not wearing a Kirk Cousins jersey, Stan.”

SF: “Would I do that to you?”

MF: “In a St. Paul minute.”

SF: “Well you’re wrong, partner.”

Fulton pulls championship belts out of the box and stacks them on the table.

MF: “These are PHWF belts.”

SF: “I know.”

S: “Why are you giving us PHWF belts?”

SF: “Because I can. I bought the PHWF from the Board of Directors. They’re a bit cash-strapped from all the issues lately and my consulting firm decided we can make a butt-load of money from the merch alone.”

MHJ: “And as owner, you control all aspects of the company, from rosters and championships to television rights, copyrights, video, merch... pretty shrewd, Stan.”

SF: “Eh. Martha called and asked what happened to everything PHWF. I looked into it and she made the deal. I now own the rights to everything that ever was associated with the PHWF.”

S: “Like the contracts of the wrestlers?”

SF: “Yep.”

MHJ: “Genius. You just more than doubled the size of our side against Juni.”

Fulton looks very pleased with himself. Not a good look, by the way.

MF: “So who gets what belt?”

SF: “I was thinking of leaving it up to you, sensei.”

MHJ: “Nope. You’re the owner, Stan.”

SF: “OK.”

Fulton picks up one belt.

SF: “Matt, you’re not just my partner, but you’ve become a friend as well. And you have a smokin’ hot wife.”

MF: “Very true.”

SF: “And even though you’re a Packer fan, which is frankly unforgivable, you’re the best pure wrestler we have. Congratulations, you’re the new PHWF World Champion.”

MF: “Thanks, Stan.”

Fulton picks up a pair of belts.

MF: “Stank, I’ve always wanted to be your tag team partner, so I’ve made it happen. You and I are the new PHWF Tag Team Champions.”

S: “Cool.”

SF: “Moose.”

MHJ: “Stan.”

SF: “The face of the Saints should be on TV all the time. Therefore, I’d like to make you the new PHWF Television Champion.”

MHJ: “I like it.”

The door opens and Mai Muyo walks in.

MM: “What are you guys up to?”

SF: “Just in time, Mai. I have a gift.”

MF: “Stan bought the PHWF from the OOWF. He awarding the championships.”

SF: “And this one’s for you.”

Fulton hands Mai the last unclaimed belt.

SF: “Mai Muyo, you are the new PHWF N-Sanity Champion.”

MF: “Fitting. If being torn between Juni and us doesn’t qualify as insanity, nothing does.”

Mai smiles and drapes the belt over her shoulder.

MHJ: “Stan. Call the Draculs. Tell them the good news that you’re their boss and have them contact me. We have work to do.”

FADE

[Fire-Babe]

Stank takes his belt.

S: I gotta go deal with something. I'm taking this.

Stank throws the belt over his shoulder and leaves, as the rest of the Saints exchange knowing looks. A few minutes later, Mai gets up and leaves as well, but goes quickly in a different direction.

Meanwhile, Fire is attending to whatever last minute things she does. Mai Muyo comes up behind her and stands mere inches away. Finally, Fire notices and turns around, pinning Mai to the wall.

FW: Oh...it's you.

Fire lets go.

MM: Ready for our match? It's going to be fantastic.

FW: Steel-Cage-For-No-Reason. Sure.

MM: You don't sound excited.

FW: I feel like I've in a million of those, Mai.

MM: Yes but not with ME, the NEWEST Saint of Sinner...the NEWEST one to take your place.

FW: ...Uh huh. Except that I've never been  in that stable so that's not my place you're taking.

MM: No no, not that. No, I'm the newest person Moose had taken under his wing, to be the sister he always wanted.

FW: ......right. Well, you and Drunkhead Jack enjoy it while it lasts.

MM: And really, he's just like the brother I never had too! He really cares about what's going on with me, not just what he can get out of the deal.

FW: Suuuuure he does.

MM: No really! Why just yesterday, he was telling me exactly what your weaknesses are.

FW: My ribs. Everyone knows that.

MM: NO, no no no...I mean yes, but you're right, everyone knows that. No, he's talking about your OTHER weaknesses. The ones that you keep hidden, or at least try to.

Fire looks at her, and it's hard to tell, but Mai seems to have her concerned. This pleases Mai a lot.

MM:Yeah, those weaknesses. The things he learned in your Best-of-7 series. The things he tried to teach Chl--

Fire punches the wall and immediately regrets it. Mai is delighted, as Fire immediately holds it in pain.

MM: Oooo, hit a nerve, eh? It seems your brother has been consistently looking for a sister to replace you, since you're such a perpetual disappointment. Now I know why he never came to look for you after your parents split up.

Stank appears just at that moment. Fire is rendered speechless.

S: That's enough, Mai.

MM: Fine, fine...see you in the ring, Fire.....*walks towards Stank*....thanks for taking me to the movies last night, I had a great time.

Mai disappears around a corner. Fire cradles her hand, but doesn't look at Stank.

S: Hey....I didn't take her out, it was a whole Saints thing.

FW: It's fine.

Stank gently takes her hand and looks at it.

S: We better get to the training room. This looks bad....

FW: *pulling it away from him, and wincing with pain* I'll have Lucky wrap it extra tight. It'll be fine.

S: Well....let's at least get some ice on it.

The two walk towards the training room.

[L!zz~]

(Arena)

(Kylie rounds a corner, Josie in hand. She stops short when she comes face to face with Alexander Darling)

Alex: (looks her up and down, eyes settling on Josie) Well, that's different.

Kylie: Suppose I should welcome you back. (pulling Josie closer)

Alex: I could say the same to you, but I won't.

Kylie: Yeh..well good running into you. (goes to walk around him)

Alex: Is she Beverly's daughter?

Kylie: (looks at him)No.

Alex: Hmm. Interesting. Where is your sister these days?

Kylie: Who knows. We don't keep in touch.

Alex: Interesting.

Kylie: Well, everyone here has dysfunctional families.

Alex: (snorts, in a classy type of way) Truth.

(without another word he walks on, Kylie waits a moment than hurries off with Josie)

[L!zz~]

(Kylie is sitting with Jack, both dressed for their matches)

Jack: You ready for your match?

Kylie: I'm ready. Will I win? Who knows. Those two have it out for each other.

Jack: Which means you'll get caught in the cross fire.

Kylie: (shrugs) Occupational hazard. Especially around here.

Jack: I know you can handle yourself.

Kylie: At least you do. I feel like I'm still proving myself all over again.

Jack: Use it to your advantage.

Kylie: What do you mean?

Jack: (grins, shoos the INC away and turns toward Kylie, leaning closer)


We fade as they stratergize

[Jack Quinn]

MidWeek Mayhem Alaskan Massacre
Live! From Juneau, Alaska
June 27, 2018

BANNED FROM EVERYWHERE vs. BEER MONEY – Weapons in a Box, on a Pole Match

“Insane in the Brain” plays and Awesome Bill From Dawsonville and Justin sane come out on Drunky and Drunkette, being led to the ring by Ellie May From Elijay. The crowd loses their minds and give the successful Polar Bear Fighters (promo to be added later) as the climb into the ring. The cheers stop when BEER MONEY’S AWESOME THEME SONG plays. (awesome theme song also to be edited in later). As SYB and Skurge make their way to the ring, SYB slips in some donkey piles and damn near falls on his ass. The crowd roars with laughter and SYB screams “NO ONE LAUGS AT SYB” and he charges into the ring and attacks Justin and Bill.

SYB grabs Justin and slams him into the corner and chokes him on the top rope. Just as Bill is about to get SYB, Skurge attacks him from behind. Skurge pulls a dazed Bill to his feet and sends him to the ropes and catches him with a SUPERKICK to the jaw, then drives Bill to the mat with a hangman’s neckbreaker! Skurge doesn’t bother covering, he heads to the corner and tries to climb the poll for a mystery weapon. Across the ring, SYB climbs over Justin, still choking him on the ropes and somehow gets up the pole and opens the box and pulls out………….A GIANT RUBBER DILDO! SYB howls in anger as the crowd roars in laughter. SYB snarls and slides down the pole and leaps from the top rope and tries to nail Justin, but Justin moves and SYB lands on his feet, Justin sweeps his legs, then hits a springboard legdrop. SYB rolls out of the ring to the floor (sans dildo) and falls to the floor.

Meanwhile on the other side of the ring, Bill catches Skurge before Skurge can get to the mystery box. Bill and Skurge are fighting on the top rope. Skurge rakes Bill’s eyes and kicks him in the chest sending bill crashing through the German Announce Table. Fortunately no Germans were harmed in the making of this spot as they were all in the back deep in mourning over Germany being booted from the World Cup – already. Bill crashes through the table and Skurge once again tries to climb the pole when Justin charges into that corner and hits an impressive leaping shining wizard to the side of Skurge’s head, sending him crashing through the Blind Fans of the OOWF Honorary Table. Poor things, they never saw it coming.

Justin gets to his feet and starts climbing the pole, but he only gets a short way before SYB slides back into the ring and runs to the corner and hits the JERSEY TURNPIKE on Justin, sending him to the mat. SYB starts to climb the ropes, but Bill recovers and slides into the ring, gets under SYB and hits a RUNNING BUCKLE BOMB on SYB! SYB’s head crashes into the turnbuckle, he might be dead. Bill climbs the pole quickly (remember, Dawsonville Pole Climbing Champion) and opens the second mystery box and pulls out……….a FEATHER BOA…..a feather boa? who thought up these weapons? Somehow SYB has recovered and is staggering around the ring, Bill puts the Boa on and leaps from the top rope and hits SYB with a SUPER ATOMIC ELBOW! SYB seriously might have just been Cyril’d. Bill wraps the boa around SYB throat and starts choking him, a bit redundant since he is dead. Now, while all this is going on, Justin is struggling to his feet from the Jersey Turnpike, Skurge has climbed out of the wreckage of the Blind Fans of the OOWF Honorary Table and has climbed one of the poles from the outside and opens the Mystery Box and pulls out………A GUN……wait, WHAT? Skurge jumps off the top rope and puts the gun to the side of Bill’s temple, Bill stops choking the recently deceased SYB and slowly gets to his feet, Justin turns around and Skurge points the gun at Justin and he stands next to Bill. The crowd is suddenly silenced. Skurge smirks and points the gun back and forth between the two, and we hear

Eenie, meany, miney, moe
Catch a tiger by his toe
If he hollers let him go
Eenie, meany, miney, moe

<Slight pause>

My mother told me to pick the very best one
And you……are………it

Skurge points the gun at Bill and pulls the trigger and silly string comes out the end. Skurge immediately regrets his decision. Bill charges and nearly cuts Skurge in half with a spear. They brawl for a few minutes, mixing it up hockey style, then Bill tries to clothesline Skurge out of the ring, but Skurge ducks and dumps Bill to the outside, he lands awkwardly on his shoulder and remains down. Ellie May runs over to check on him.

SYB, who it turns out wasn’t dead after all, is leaning on the ropes to stand. Skurge clotheslines Justin from behind and the beat down on Justin begins. Ellie May stops tending to Bill and climbs onto the apron and calls SYB over and starts to flirt, SYB naturally falls for it and comes over and makes every manner of inappropriate comments while thrusting his junk in her direction. Ellie May reaches into her jacket pocket and pulls out some lipstick and SYB’s eyes light up. Ellie May coyly turns around to apply the lipstick, but instead pulls a bottle of PCPL out of her pocket and downs a large gulp. She turns back around and SYB lunges, but Ellie May exhales a large breath on him, SYB nearly turns green, gags and drops to his knees choking. Elli May hops off the apron, smirks at a gagging SYB, then helps Bill to his feet.

Across the ring, Skurge is decimating Justin, hitting him with a choke slam backbreaker and holding him there trying for a submission. Justin refuses to give, so Skurge pulls him to his feet and lifts him for a brainbuster, but he gets a little too close to the final Mystery Box and Justin is able to slip free, land on the top rope, climb the poll and open the last Mystery Box and……………..BEAST POPS OUT!

Beast comes out of the box and leaps to the mat, hitting Skurge with a FIST TO THE TOP OF THE HEAD! Skurge flails backward and falls out of the ring. SYB is just getting to his feet, he turns around and sees BEAST standing there with the giant rubber dildo and SYB screams in horror. BEAST grabs him and sends him to the ropes and WHIPS the giant rubber dildo right across SYB’s face! SYB is OUT. COLD. BEAST then leaves the ring and disappears to the back! Face it, this could have gone a WHOLE lot worse for SYB. Justin hops off the top rope, looking a bit in shock, he walks over to SYB then falls on him and covers, the crowd counts along, ONE……..TWO……THREE!
WINNERS in 21:49 – Banned From Everywhere

Skurge slowly gets to his feet, helped up by the Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth. He gets steadied, then grabs SYB and pulls him from the ring, lays him on the floor then drags him to the back while Mantooth steadies him.

GHOSTHEAD vs. SHIZURU-MUME MAGUNIKU-COX – Black Cat Match, Loser Gets Ten Lashes

Mike Elevenbee has the mic for the rules

”Ladies and Gentlemen the rules of the match are as follows. The winner of the match has to hang his opponent over the top rope with his feet off the mat for a count of five. But before that can happen, the man being hung must be bleeding. In addition to those rules, the loser of the match is to receive ten lashes from his opponent

Ghost is announced and makes his way to the ring, accompanied by Shannon, to mixed cheers from the crowd. Ghost steps between the ropes and waits silently in the corner. The Crusade by Lovebites plays and Shizuru-Mume Maguniku-Cox makes his way to the ring, glaring at Ghost. Sizzle holds the strap for the match and points it at Ghost, who remains motionless. Sizzle climbs onto the apron and hangs the strap over the ring post. He steps into the ring and walks right up to Ghost in the middle of the ring. The two engage in a long stare down before Sizzle hauls off and SLAPS the shit out of Ghost. Ghost glares at him while the fans start a GHOST IS GONNA KILL YOU chant. Undaunted, Sizzle kicks Ghost low and takes him to the mat and hammers him with punches to the side of the face. Sizzle gets to his feet and waits for Ghost to get to a knee, then Sizzle charges in and kicks Ghost’s knee from beneath him. Sizzle repeatedly stomps on Ghost’s knee, then traps him in an Indian Death lock. There are no pinfalls, submissions, count outs or disqualifications in this match so Sizzle could literally break Ghost’s knee here!

Ghost finally frees himself from the Indian Death lock and gets to his feet with a noticeable limp. He staggers into the corner and Sizzle charges, but Ghost gets a boot up, his bad knee, and Sizzle slams into it and staggers to the mat before finally falling to his hands and knees. In the corner, Ghost snarls then limp runs toward Sizzle and hits a PUNT to the side of the head! Sizzle flips over and stares glassy eyed at the ceiling, Ghost falls to one knee, then rolls out of the ring and tries to walk it off a bit. Inside the ring, Sizzle fights to his feet and turns and snarls at Ghost. Sizzle charges and dives over the top rope at Ghost, Ghost moves and Sizzle SLAMS into the guardrail face first. Sizzle remains on the floor for a disturbingly long time. Ghost turns and clears off the Moroccan announce table, then pulls Sizzle to his feet.

Sizzle has been busted open what we call, hardway. He is an absolute bloody mess. Like, Bill Alfonzo levels of gore. Ghost pulls him to his feet and rolls him onto the announce table, then grabs him and goozles him for a chokeslam! But Sizzle isn’t dead, yet. He kicks Ghost low, then grabs him and lifts him and PILEDRIVES him through the table! The crowd gasps and even Shannon looks concerned. Sizzle slowly climbs out of the rubble and throws pieces of table aside and we see Ghost clutching the back of his neck, but not bloody. Sizzle looks down, then grabs a couple of chairs, he slides one under Ghost’s head, then takes the other and repeatedly slams it down on Ghost. Shannon runs over and pleads with Sizzle to stop. Ghost smiles through the blood and bows to Shannon “anything for Sha-na-nanon san”. Sizzle throws the chair aside, and we see a pool of blood by Ghost’s head. Sizzle pulls him up and rolls him into the ring, grabs the length of rope from the table and slides in after him. Sizzle loops it around Ghost’s neck and pulls him up and dumps him over the top rope to the floor. Sizzle grabs the rope and struggles, but he manages to pull Ghost to his feet, then off his feet! The referee starts the count, ONE…..TWO…….THREE……FOU……Ghost snaps to and gets his leg up on the apron, breaking the count. He grabs the rope and falls off the apron, whipping Sizzle over the top rope to the floor.

Sizzle lands with a sickening thud, and Ghost glares at him and slowly removes the rope from his neck. He throws it back into the ring and walks over to Sizzle and stomps on the back of his head. Ghost pulls Sizzle to his feet and throws him into then hefts him to the top rope. Ghost sets up and hits a TOP ROPE HORROR DRIVER! Ok, THIS has to be a homicide, right? Ghost grabs the rope and loops it around Sizzle’s neck and throws him over the top rope. Ghost fights to pull Sizzle up, his knee buckling several times, but finally he gets him off his feet, Sizzle struggles and fights, getting an actual pop from the crowd, then goes limp. The referee counts ONE…….TWO……THREE……FOUR…….FIVE! Ghost drops Sizzle and falls to the mat holding his knee.
WINNER in 25:11 – Ghosthead

The referee gets the rope from around Sizzle’s neck and helps him to his feet. Sizzle looks into the ring and sees Ghost standing there with the leather strap. Sizzle looks at the referee, then slides into the ring with a determined look on his face. He grabs the top rope and stands there, he looks back at Ghost

DO IT!

<Ghost whips him>

AGAIN!

<Ghost whips him>

AGAIN!

<Ghost whips him>

AGAIN!

<This goes on for ten lashes, for the last few Sizzle nearly falls to his knees but refuses to go down. The crowd is actually booing Ghost pretty loudly when he finishes. The lashes stop, Sizzle’s back is a bloody mess of welts, Ghost and Shannon turn to leave the ring, but Sizzle turns around and points to Shannon>

Now you.

<Shannon shakes her head, then takes the lash and UNLOADS on Sizzle, ten shots in quick succession puts Sizzle on the mat in intense pain. He slides out of the ring to the floor. Shannon drops the lash and she and Ghost leave the ring. The crowd boos them mercilessly>

Sizzle is sitting ringside staring at his bloody hands and something is clearly not well at the Sizzle Home. Sizzle reaches under the ring and grabs a bag, he pulls something out of it, then slides the rest into the ring. Sizzle gets to his feet and charges after the pair, a hard elbow to the back of the head drops Shannon, Ghost turns around and we see what Sizzle has in his hands, a stun gun. As in a legit, no shit, stun gun. He zaps Ghost, no added sound effects necessary, and Ghost goes down. Sizzle hits him again and again until Ghost is convulsing on the ground. Sizzle grabs Shannon and rolls her back into the ring, then grabs a cloth and spray from his bag, ETHER! He puts the rag over Shannon’s mouth and nose and within a few seconds Shannon goes limp. Once again to the bag, Sizzle pulls out what appears to be a…….it’s a WEDDING GOWN! He slips it over her head, then puts on a tux jacked with tails on. He pulls her to her feet and dances with her, then performs a “wedding ceremony”

Does Sizzle love Sha-na-nanon Man? Yes! Does Sha-na-nanon love Sizzle? <high pitched voice> YES! Then Shannon and Sizzle are man and wife!

Sizzle dances with Shannon again, then dips her deep and gives her a big, bloody kiss, smearing his blood all over her face. The crowd is now booing the SHIT out of Sizzle. He lifts Shannon in his arms and walks up the ramp, past where medics are working on Ghost, and he carries her across the mantle into the back.


THE DARLINGS vs. THE SAINTS OF SINNERS

Russ: Welcome to this week's edition of OOWF Mayhem. I'm Russ, this is Razz and this week we start with a barn burner folks. The World Tag Team Champions Matt Folz and Stan Fulton in a non title match against the Darling Twins.

Razz: Matt and Stan laid out some of the history between these two teams last night. Nothing but bad blood on both sides, this one could get ugly quick folks.

Russ: Let's head to the ring.

"Friction" brings Alexander and Alexis Darling down to the ring to a mixed but mostly positive reaction. They warm up in the ring as "Laser Cannon Deth Sentence" brings down the reigning OOWF Tag Team Champions. Matt and Stan don't take their eyes off their opponents as they get in the ring. The referee calls for the bell and this one is underway.

Matt and Alex start off for their respective teams and immediately start going after one another with hard right hands. Matt whips Alex off the ropes and looks for a Spinebuster but Alex elbows Matt in the back of his head. Alex with a snap suplex and he tags in his sister. Alexis heads up top and nails Matt with a missile dropkick and covers for 2. For the next few minutes the Darlings use their natural chemistry and keep Matt off balance with quick tags in and out, using nice double team moves to get several 2 counts. Alexis goes for the Bitch Killer but Matt rakes her eyes to escape and rolls to his corner to tag in Stan.

Fulton comes in and lands a few kicks to Alexis's leg, then drops an elbow across the inside of her knee and torques trying for a submission. Alexis reaches the ropes and Fulton breaks. Fulton gets to his feet and pulls Alexis to the ropes and puts her foot on the bottom rope and drops his weight across Alexis's leg. Alexis howls in pain and grabs her leg dragging herself to the middle of the ring. Fulton grabs her leg again and turns her over in a half crab pulling back on that injured leg. The referee asks Alexis if she wants to quit, but she refuses. Fulton reaches out and tags in Folz, Folz comes in and he grabs the leg that Fulton had been working on and slams Alexis's ankle hard to the mat. Matt backs up a step and laughs as he sees Alexis use the ropes to pull herself up before chop blocking her ankle. Matt tries for the ankle lock but Alexis uses her other leg to kick Matt off. Matt recovers and grabs Alexis's leg but Alexis nails him with an enziguri. Alexis struggles to her corner as Matt tries to clear the cobwebs and make his way to his corner. Matt makes the tag to Stan, Stan comes in and tries to cut off the tag but Alexis reaches up and makes the tag to Alex.

Alex comes in a house on fire, nailing Stan with huge shots that move the big man back. Matt tries to cut Alex off but Alex nails him as well. Alex sets up for the Darling Driver but Matt nails him from behind. This draws Alexis in and all 4 start brawling. Matt dumps Alexis over the top and follows to slam her head into the steps. Back in the ring, the momentum of a Stan clothesline sends both him and Alex out of the ring also. Matt now starts hammering on Alex from behind as Stan moves over and works on Alexis. The referee is in the ring counting but neither team is paying any attention. The referee shrugs and calls for the bell.

Official result (10:22) Double Count out.

The match may have ended but the action has not as Stan gives Alexis a Backcut Slam on the concrete floor. Meanwhile, Matt has grabbed a steel chair, but Alex gives him a low blow and grabs it himself. Alex is about to drive it down on Matt's head when someone grabs it from behind. Alex turns and sees that it's MOOSEHEAD JACK! Alex smirks and dares Moose to attack him, but this costs him as Matt gets back to his feet and pulls Alex into an Angle Slam. We hear Alex's head hitting the concrete with a sick thud. Matt, Stan and Moose walk to their back with their arms raised as the crowd boos the hell out of them.

Russ: The Saints may have won the first battle but this war is just getting started folks.

FIREWOMAN vs. MAI MUYO – Steel Cage Match

Fire comes to the ring first, Eco comes with her and takes his spot in the corner. The crowd cheers as Fire steps into the ring. We see Fire has her hand HEAVILY bandaged. Not a good sign. Mai comes out next, accompanied by Moose. Mai is booed loudly, but makes her way to the ring with her head held high, ignoring the fans. Mai looks at Fire and smirks. Fire glares at Mai, then looks over her shoulder and sees Moose standing there and snarls at him. Mai steps into the cage and the referee locks the door and the bell rings!

Mai and Fire slowly circle, each one with their hands out ready to strike, both feign a few punches, then Mai feigns a right, Fire ducks, and Mai kicks her injured hand, dropping Fire to a knee. Mai grabs a side headlock, but Fire fights out of it with a BACKDROP DRIVER! Mai lands hard on the back of her head, but most of Mai’s weight comes down on Fire’s hand. Fire is on her knees holding her hand, Mai gets up and charges in for a short dropkick to the face, but Fire moves out of the way and Mai crashes into the corner, once again landing on the back of her head. Fire pounces and hammers her with shots to the face with her non injured hand.

Fire gets angrier and angrier and starts dropping forearms down across Mai. Mai catches the last shot and rolls Fire into a Fujiwara arm bar! Fire struggles to the ropes but finally grabs the bottom rope for the break. Mai spins to her feet as Fire sits at the ropes holding her elbow and hand. Mai smirks again, she seems to be content picking Fire apart piece by piece.

Fire gets to her feet and Mai charges, but Fire moves and traps her in the corner and lands several high knees to Mai’s face. The last one catches Mai right on the nose, and she immediately staggers away pouring blood from her nose. Fire grabs her from behind and runs her face first into the cage. Mai staggers backward and Fire grabs her and lifts her and drops her between the cage and the ropes. She slams Mai’s head repeatedly into the cage, then climbs on the bottom rope and lands several hard kicks to the back of Mai’s face driving her into the steel. Mai finally slumps to the mat, Fire pulls her back into the ring and covers, but Mai kicks out at two.

Fire slaps the mat in frustration, then immediately regrets it. She grabs her hand and falls to the mat. She regains her composure, but Mai has pulled herself up and is waiting against the ropes, blood pouring from her face. Mai charges and catches Fire with a BUISAKU knee to the face. Fire’s head snaps back and she staggers to the ropes, as she bounces off the ropes Mai connects with a series of kicks to Fire’s always injured ribs, then follows it with a spinning heel kick to Fire’s mouth. Fire falls to the mat and Mai pounces on her, pulling her head back and hitting cross arms across her face until Fire’s nose starts bleeding as well.

Mai pulls her to her feet and send her to the ropes, elevates her on the rebound and then drops to the mat so Fire crashes down on her knees. Fire grabs her ribs and howls in anger and pain. Mai gets to her feet and does a little bow in Fire’s direction. Fire fights to her knees, spits out some blood and tells Mai to bring it.

Mai brings it, and the two of them tear into one another with a fury that makes the crowd slightly uncomfortable. Fire hits Mai with a MOOSEKILLER (all while staring at Moose) and nearly gets the three, but Mai gets her foot on the bottom rope. Mai gains the advantage when she moves out of the way of a charging Fire and slams her face into the cage, then hits a TIGER DRIVER! Mai covers, but Fire kicks out. Mai heads to the corner and climbs the turnbuckle, then starts climbing the cage. Fire follows her and the two get to the top and start trading blows. Fire nearly kicks Mai off the cage, but she miraculously saves her balance and stays. She rakes Fire’s eyes, almost causing her to fall, then grabs her injured hand and repeatedly slams it on top of the cage. Fire howls in pain then falls off the cage, hits the ropes awkwardly, then slams to the mat. Mai gets up, steadies herself on the top of the cage, then hits a SAVIOR SPLASH, crashing down on Fire, while glaring right at Eco. The referee makes the count, and Mai gets the win.
WINNER in 22:10 – Mai Muyo

Mai gets to her feet and stands over Fire, then wipes the blood from her forehead and sprays it on Fire. Mai leaves the ring and she and Jack walk to the back soaking in the boos. Eco climbs into the cage and checks on Fire. He helps her to her feet, carefully holding her hand steady and heads to the back

<we cut to the back, where a recovered Ghosthead is LIVID. He stomps down the hallway calling for Sizzle, but gets no response. Finally he opens a door and there sits Shannon, bound to a chair, but clearly ok, still covered in blood. Ghost walks in and looks around the room, the walls are covered in writing, in what looks like Sizzle’s blood. On one wall it says “Mrs. Sha-na-non Maguniku” on another it says “Sha-na-non N’ Sizzle 4 Ever”. On the next wall it says “Sizzle on crusade!” And on the final “Ghost must die”. Ghost unties Shannon, glances around the room again and leads her to medical to be checked on.

MAC FLASHER vs. STANK vs. KYLIE MIGNOLIO

“Skin” draws out Stank as the big man coolly stalks to the ringside area, acknowledging the pockets of fans who treat Stank like a hero and not as a villain. Stank steps into the ring and waits on his opposition with “Jaded” interrupting to send out Kylie Mignolio, who bounds out to the ringside area. Kylie flips into the ring and doesn’t give an inch as Stank gestures toward her. While Kylie and Stank are staring each other down, “I Get Wet” plays Mac Flasher to the ramp. Mac holds his OOWF World Championship above his head before placing it on his shoulder and heading to the ring. Mac salutes his fans, before nodding at Kylie and glaring toward Stank.

OOWF official Mel Creech calls for the bell as Kylie wastes no time in taking the fight to Stank, who shrugs off the first few attacks before Kylie drills Stank in the chin with a bicycle kick.

Russ: “She watches the World Cup once …”
Razz: “At least it wasn’t a penalty kick to the groin.”
Russ: “That seems like more of what Stank would take away from the World Cup.”

Mac jumps into the fray as he and Kylie hammer away at the downed and dazed Stank with Mac cinching a half-crab on Stank while Kylie tries to lock him in a crossface. Before Kylie can lock it in, Stank shoves her off and kicks Mac away with his free leg to earn a breather. It’s short-lived as Mac hits a baseball slide on Stank’s left leg, chopping him down. Kylie recovers and starts in with rapid-strike offense, putting Stank on his back with a running knee strike. Mac tries a cover with Stank kicking out at 2. Kylie tries and Stank powers out at 2. Mac splashes Stank with Kylie jumping on Mac for good measure. That gets 2 as Stank presses both opponents off, sending Mac to the mat and Kylie soaring into the ropes.

Stank turns his focus to Mac, pounding him with forearms and an elbow to the temple that puts Mac on spaghetti legs. Kylie tries to catch Stank by surprise with a crossbody from the top, only to get caught and press slammed onto Mac. Stank drives an elbow onto Kylie while she’s still on Mac. While Stank stands, Kylie gets 1.5 on Mac as both writhe on the mat. With both Kylie and Mac struggling to their feet, Stank hits a running big boot on both Kylie and Mac, dropping Mac where he stood. Stank grabs Kylie by her hair and tries to powerbomb her, connecting with booming impact as Kylie lay on the mat. Stank makes a cover and Mac makes the save at 2.5. Stank grabs Mac and dumps him to the outside while refocusing on Kylie. Stank picks Kylie up by the hair, but gets a pair of boots to the stomach to coax a release. Kylie attacks Stank’s left leg with a few hamstring kicks and a shoulder to the knee as Stank leads his vertical base. With Stank now horizontal, Kylie tries a standing moonsault that gets 1. Stank sits up only to see Mac diving in with a springboard dropkick that gets 2. As Mac tries to pick Stank up to a vertical position, Kylie sneaks in and rolls up Mac for 2. With Mac and Kylie standing off, Stank bumps Mac into Kylie before running Mac to the corner and posting his shoulder. As Kylie stands dazed, a lariat and big splash flatten Kylie for 2.5 as Mac makes the save.

Razz: “Mac realizes that his hopes of winning include getting Stank out first.”
Russ: “He’s the OOWF World Champion. He’s beaten Stank before. Why would he need Kylie?”
Razz: “Why wouldn’t he?”

Mac and Kylie discuss strategy while Stank lariats both combatants. Stank whips Kylie into the corner and then Mac before following with a corner splash. Mac falls forward with Kylie slumped in the corner. Stank goes for a second corner splash before Mac trips him up about two steps away. While still dazed, Kylie climbs the turnbuckles and attempts a headscissors takedown on Stank, who merely falls backwards to squash Kylie. With Kylie on her back, Mac steps in and gets a headbutt for his efforts. Mac stumbles while holding his head, tripping over Kylie. Mac’s inadvertent cover attempt gets 3 as Stank holds back a chuckle.

Kylie Mignolio (pinfall, 10:17) has been eliminated.

Mac, still woozy, stands up and eats a discus punch from Stank. As Mac flies to the corner, Mac is defenseless against Stank’s attack as he peppers the champion with punches and a few knees for good measure. Stank then pulls Mac out and posts his shoulder again. With Mac draped over the turnbuckle, Stank starts to taunt ringside fans. Mac pulls himself out of the corner and into a scoop slam by Stank. A leg drop follows but gets 1 as Mac gets a leg on the bottom rope. Stank and Creech discuss matters about Creech’s count as Mac stands up and flies in with a punch to Stank’s cheek. Stank staggers a bit as Mac tries to rally. His weakened shoulder prevents most offense beyond a strikes as evidenced by Stank quickly turning the tide with a forearm to the affected joint. Stank then delivers a hammerlock bodyslam, getting 2 off that pin attempt. Stank continues working Mac’s arm by draping it over the top rope before dropping off the apron while holding Mac’s wrist. With Mac almost believing that his shoulder has been separated, Stank takes his time for a reentry, getting caught in a small package that gets 2. Stank, now a bit more urgent, hammers away at a grounded Mac until Creech stops the closed-fist fiesta. Stank, pleading his reasoning for the punches, doesn’t see Mac climbing the corner behind him. Stank’s only knowledge is Mac yelling “ASS PUNCH!” before delivering a punch to Stank’s backside. It’s enough to seat Stank, creating more ripples of pain before Mac hits a low crossbody that gets 2. Mac stands Stank up and hits a DDT that gets 1 after Mac isn’t able to quickly make a pin attempt. Both men stand and alternate punches with fans cheering Mac’s strikes and booing Stank’s punches … Mostly. Stank ends the exchange with a particularly devastating punch and a headbutt to Mac’s shoulder.

With Mac reeling, Stank whips Mac from corner to corner, getting Mac acquainted with three of the four corners before Mac collapses on his way to the fourth set of turnbuckles. Stank delivers a set of elbow drops to a downed Mac and signals for Stankonia 2.0. Stank connects, but still feels the effects of Mac’s aerial assault on his derriere, meaning that a cover only happens when Stank takes a more traditional route. That gets 2 as Mac shoots his shoulder up. In frustration, Stank pounds Mac’s head off the mat about a half-dozen times before Creech steps in.

Russ: “This is not like Mel Creech to step up to a rulebreaker, but here we are.”
Razz: “Stank’s check must have bounced.”

With Creech and Stank arguing, Mac comes to and opts to play possum while on his back. Stank sees his chance for a leg drop that gets nothing but canvas as Mac sits up while Stank was just starting his jump. With Stank rolling on the mat, Mac stands Stank up and twists him into position for a Duquesne Incline. Mac quickly drives Stank forehead first to the mat and contorts him just long enough to get the pin.

Your winner (pinfall, 48:36) Mac Flasher.

Mac slides out of the ring to catch his breath as Stank sits up with an expression of stunned anger. Mac, with almost zero gesturing to the fans in Juneau, walks up the ramp with occasional lookbacks t

SHANNON MANN vs. JACK BULLET – OOWF Onslaught Championship Match

A clearly shaken, but focused Shannon makes her way to the ring. She waits in the corner with a strange look on her face. Jack Bullet is announced next and the crowd roars. The bell rings and we are underway!

Darting across the ring, Bullett runs straight for Shannon before the bell even silences. Leaping forward, he flies in Shannon’s direction, drawing his hand back and readying himself for a massive flying punch. Quick on her feet, Shannon rolls out of the way as Bullett improvises in mid air and lands both feet onto the middle turnbuckle while grabbing the top rope on each side of the corner. Jumping up into a handstand, Bullett then pushes himself away from the corner and kicks his legs out, planting them both into Shannon’s shoulders as he gets back to his feet. Shannon falls back down to the mat as Bullett lands to his feet to the mat.

Rushing to get up, Shannon sees Bullett lunging in to grab ahold of her. Lowering her shoulder and stepping forward, Shannon drives her shoulder into Bullett’s stomach. Wrapping Bullett around the waist with both arms, Shannon lifts him off his feet and takes a few quick steps forward, slamming Bullett’s back into the corner. Throwing a left and then a right, Shannon punches Bullett in the ribs before lifting him up again and placing him on the top of the corner. She then holds Bullett with her left hand while throwing a right up and connecting square in Bullett’s mouth.

Climbing to the middle ropes, Shannon goes to set Bullett up for a suplex from the top but before he can pull it off, Bullett pushes her backwards and sends her down to the mat on her back. Racing to her feet, Shannon then looks up and braces herself as Bullett flies down in her direction. Turning his body and completely stretching his limbs, Bullett collides into Shannon with a diving crossbody. Shannon falls back with Bullett on top of her and hits the canvas hard. Going for a quick pin, Bullett hooks Shannon’s leg as the official slides in beside them with the count.

ONE

Popping a shoulder up from the mat, Shannon breaks up the count before the officials hand slaps the mat a second time.

On his feet, Bullett begins stomping down onto Shannon as she rolls across the ring. Raising his knee to his chest, Bullett then kicks his leg down, only to have his foot caught as Shannon manages to get both hands on it. Holding onto Bullett’s foot, Shannon rises up to one knee. As she pops completely up, she shoves Bullett’s leg back at him, sending him falling backwards and hitting the mat. Bullett rolls backwards and up to his feet fluidly only to get taken head on as Shannon charges in and leaps forward, wiping him out with a Lou Thesz Press.

Russ: ”We have some fast paced action on our hands Razz.”

Razz: ”These two know what’s at stake. No point in holding back when there are championship implications on the line.”

Swinging wildly, Shannon rains down onto Bullett’s head with rapid lefts and rights. A final right gets swatted away before connecting with Bullett’s head, giving Bullett an opportunity. Grabbing Shannon by the shoulders, Bullett rolls to his side, shoving Shannon off of him in the process. Both quickly race to their feet, standing together in unison. They quickly lock up and Bullett pulls Shannon’s head down into a side headlock. wrapping Bullett around the waist with both arms, Shannon then lifts him off his feet and as high as she can as if going for a suplex next. Rolling backwards and out of Shannon’s arms, Bullett lands behind Shannon and grabs her by the shoulder to spin her around. Hitting Shannon in the mouth with a quick jab, Bullett then locks onto her arm and goes to whip her to the ropes. Before Bullett can release, Shannon reverses the throw and sends Bullett to the ropes instead. As Bullett bounces off the ropes, Shannon ducks down to flip Bullett over his back but instead eats a mouthful of boot as Bullett kicks her in the face. Shannon then rushes in for a clothesline but misses as Bullett ducks underneath. Just as Shannon turns around, Bullett lunges at her to lock up but Shannon kicks his foot up, aiming for Bullett’s stomach. As Shannon’s foot closes in, Bullett grabs ahold of it with both hands, avoiding impact to his mid-section. Bullett then swings Shannon’s leg to the side, spinning her around but as Shannon makes a full revolution, she catches Bullett by surprise with a dragon whip.
Bullett pushes himself up to one knee as Shannon races past him towards the ropes. Coming back on the return, Shannon leaps forward, wiping Bullett out with a diving clothesline. Back on her feet, Shannon doesn’t give Bullett a single second to catch a breather as she begins stomping down onto his lower legs. Pulling Bullett up from the mat, Shannon hits him with back to back rights before following up with a kick to the stomach, forcing Bullett to buckle over from the impact. Locking her arm around Bullett’s head, Shannon then takes a few steps forward, pulling Bullett along with her. Leaping forward, she then plants Bullett’s face into the mat with a bulldog. Rolling Shannon over to his back, Shannon makes the cover as the official races over for the count.

ONE
TW–

Russ: ”NO! Bullett kicks out!”

Kicking out and pushing Shannon up, Bullett breaks up the officials count before a complete two.

Razz: ”These two aren’t playing any games tonight.”
Russ: ”It’s a big match as we all know. There’s always time to relax and take a break after the be–“
Razz: ”Look out Bullett!”

After getting back to her feet, Shannon jumps up and as she comes down, she kicks both legs straight, planting erfeet into the side of Bullett’s head just before he completely falls to the mat. The kick rolls Bullett over a few times before stopping on his stomach. Bullett crawls to the ropes and underneath them to where his head is out onto the apron looking down at it. On her feet, Shannon rushes over and steps in beside her. Grabbing the top rope, Shannon then jumps up and pulls hierself over, coming down with a slingshot legdrop to Bullett’s head.

Russ: ”Shannon misses!”

Rolling out of the way, Bullett avoids the legdrop as Shannon lands awkwardly onto the apron before bouncing off and falling over to the floor and hitting it rather hard. With Shannon down on the outside, the official begins the ten count as Bullett slowly pushes himself all the way back into the ring.

“One! … Two!”

Pulling himself up with the ropes, Bullett climbs to his feet.

“Three! … Four!”

On the outside, Shannon slowly pulls herself up using the side of the ring.

“Five! … Six!”

Backing away from the ring, Shannon reaches around and massages her bottom where she crashed onto the apron.

“Seven! … Eight!”

Hitting the ropes across the ring, Bullett zips past the official and runs towards the ropes between he and Shannon. Leaping over the top rope, Bullett crashes into Shannon. Shannon absorbs the impact of the crash to the floor as Bullett remains on top of her. The entire arena bursts with cheers at the sight of the high risk move on account of Bullett. With both outside now, the official then restarts the ten count.

“One! … Two!”

Bullett quickly gets back to his feet before turning to Shannon and kicking her a few times while she’s down.

“Three! … Four!”

Pulling Shannon up from the floor, Bullett then whips hier into the barricade at ringside as the fans in the front row got wild and although he’s hurting, the ladies nearby all rush in to touch him. He smiles, and the light pings off his teeth.

“Five! … Six!”

Pulling Shannon away from the barricade, Bullett then lifts her up onto his shoulders before falling back and putting her back down to the floor with a Samoan drop.

“Seven! … Eight!”

Bullett pulls Shannon back to her feet and then rolls her underneath the bottom rope back into the ring.

“Nine!”

Sliding in himself, Bullett ends the officials ten count which was barely even heard due to the sound levels of the crowd after reacting to Bullett’s suicide dive.

Crawling over to Shannon, Bullett covers her for the pin as the official drops in beside them with the count.

ONE

.

.

TWO

.

THREE
WINNER in 14:21 and STILL OOWF Onslaught Champion – Jack Bullet


BRIDGET O’MALLEY vs. ZED – OOWF Intercontinental Title Match – Onslaught Rules

Bridget O'Malley heads to the ring to "Crown on the Ground" and cheers. She slides under the ropes and poses for the crowd with the "me want the belt" signal. Zed comes into "Hero" by Nickelback, possibly the heeliest song ever. He holds his IC belt high after he gets into the ring. Hightower takes the belt from him and observes the formalities and we get the bell. Because this Intercontinental Championship is being contested under Onslaught rules, Zed and Bridget do the required hand shake before they start laying into each other. At first, they each have a hard time defending; Bridget's MMA style doesn't mesh well with Zed's all out brawling abilities, and before long they're able to defend and counter somewhat easily. Zed's still stronger, though, and he whips Bridget into the ropes. Bridget bounces out, and Zed ducks down for what he thinks will be a back body drop, but instead, Bridget shoulder-rolls over him, and then grabs him from behind for a quick belly-to-back release suplex. She leaps to her feet and quickly applies them to Zed, delaying his recovery, but he still struggles to his feet. Some more exchanges, including a back-and-forth rope series. On the next pass through, Bridget eats a Superkick, and then Zed puts her into the Brick in the Wall. Bridget flails around and streeeeeeeeeeetches until she grabs the bottom rope.

Bridget has used her first rope break.

Zed releases and Bridget rolls out for a bit, walking out the kinks in her back. She gets very little time to do that though, as from out of nowhere...well, okay, from out of the ring, Zed comes flying through the ropes, and they both crash into the barricade. Hightower starts the count. Even though her back is still sore, Bridget it closer to the ring so she's able to roll in to break up the count, then she rolls back out. She grabs Zed and throws him into the steps. She climbs to the top step, and does a flying double stomp. Zed folds over in pain. Bridget grabs and arm and pulls him to his feet and whips him into the opposite ring post. As he staggers back she catches him in an exploder suplex, and then rolls into the ring. Hightower quickly tries to figure out what number he should be on, but as he's doing that, Zed pulls himself up using the ring apron for assistance. Bridget pulls him the rest of the way into the ring, and makes the cover, one...two...NO~! Zed kicks out. Bridget suggests politely to Hightower that his count may be just a tad slow, but as they are discussing matters, Zed is getting his strength back. Bridget and Hightower have come to an understanding, and Bridget turns to face Zed, only to be met with ANOTHER Superkick! Zed grabs a leg and puts Bridget into an ankle lock, but Bridget is not so far out of it. She rolls in the direction of the lock (duh) and kicks Zed backward. She gets to her feet as Zed is climbing to the top ropes. Bridget climbs after him, and the two exchange some punches and tease superplexes. Bridget maneuvers around and drops to the mat, getting Zed on her shoulders. She's going for the YINZERBOMB~! but Zed vaults over her! As she turns around she gets ANOTHER Superkick, and this time Zed follows up with GTH~! and he rolls her up for the pin. Bridget kicks her feet wildly, but cannot break free. One...two...THREE~!
WINNER in 45:40 and STILL OOWF Intercontinental Champion - Zed

Hightower raises Zed's hand, and suddenly Nonpoint's "Skin" plays, and Stank comes stalking down to the ring. He gets into the ring and takes a long, hard look at Zed, before turning to Bridget, who is slowly getting to her feet. Stank's face softens and he helps Bridget the rest of the way to her feet.

Russ: What's up with this?
Razz: Maybe he has a thing for redheads?

Stank gently puts his hand under Bridget's chin and then.....SHITFACED~! Bridget is out cold on the mat. Zed and Stank look at each other and nod. Stank raises Zed's arm and Zed holds the belt up with his other hand, and then both men exit the ring and walk back up the ramp to Zed's music.

Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action be sure to check out the OOWF Mid-Summer Night’s Scream 10 PPV Live, July 29, LIVE! from Toronto, Ontario Canada! And don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem, Live! July 4th live! from Vancouver, British Columbia!

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