[Moosehead Jack]

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem (#873)
Live! From St. John's Newfoundland & Labrador
August 8, 2018

90 Minute Time Limit Match
Alexander Darling vs. Matt Folz

Beer Money, Shannon Mann, Shizuru & Mai Muyo vs. Banned From Everywhere, Ecosystem, Ghosthead & Firewoman
Zed & Stank vs. Bridget O'Malley & Kylie Mignolio
Mac Flasher vs. Matty Alouette
Moosehead Jack vs. Tavian Dracul
Stan Fulton vs. Alexis Darling



Card subject to Newfoundland and Labrador going to war with Ottawa

[Leo]

"Silver Eagle" Jack Bullet sits in a rundown bar somewhere in Canada while "I'm Drinking Canada Dry" by the Flying Burrito Brothers play in the background. He hasn't shaved in about a week and his hair is unkempt. He smells like Detroit. He wobbles a shot glass on the bar. What was in it last? He can't remember and he's doesn't care.

Carl Sack comes in and sits down. He crosses his hands over the bar and sits there for about a half minute without saying a word.

CS: I'm surprised it took me and the OOWF Ninja Cameras this long to find you. Nobody has seen you since the pay-per-view. A lot of people are worried about you.

Bullet throws the shot glass over his shoulder and it bounces off said ninja camera with a clunk. Sack looks surprised, wondering if anyone has ever made contact with the ever present and never seen ninja cameras. He regains his composure quickly.

CS: Kylie is worried about you. Josie is worried about you. Kylie tells me she cries every night before going to bed asking where you are.

JB: Are you worried about me?

CS: Only because I'm paid too.

JB: See, that's why I hired you as CEO of Bullet Brands. You're honest.

CS: Then let me be honest and say you're acting like a little bitch. For wanting to be Jack Bullet, Man of Action, you're acting right now like Jack Bullet, Man of Who Gives a Damn. I'm working on your suspension, but I can't go to Danny Taylor and the board with you being a real life David Allen Coe song. Get out of this bar, get sober and get cleaned up.

JB: I hit a fan. I am nothing without the fans. I know that and any wrestler worth a damn should understand that. It doesn't matter how good you are in the ring, if you're not getting booed out of the building or cheered so loud you can't think, you're nobody, you're nowhere.

CS: I say the son of a bitch had it coming.

JB: He did. "Cane Josie." Yeah, yeah, I know it's a play off of the old Mick Foley angle. I know I should be spitting hot fire like Foley did right now. I'm not Mick Foley. I'm more disappointed in myself for not taking the high road. Yes, I've been a crowd pleaser, but I've done it my way my whole career. I won't hit a woman, I won't cheat to win, I show the respect I get. Right now, I don't respect myself.

Sack pulls a card out of his jacket pocket and sits it on the bar.

CS: If you've lost your self-respect, maybe we have another way around the suspension. He said if you're interested in a proposition to give him a call.

Bullet looks at the card, squints as if he can't believe what he's seeing and then his eyes open wider when he realizes it's what he thinks it is.

JB: Seriously, he wants to talk to me?

CS: It's what he said.

Sack puts his arms up as if he's washing his hands of it.

CS: Do what you need to do Jack, but do it now. Take action.

Sack walks off as Bullet twirls the card on the bar like he was previously doing to the shot glass.

FADE

[snelson66]

FADE in somewhere on the road from Quebec City to St. John’s (which is a freakin’ thirty hour drive with toll roads and a ferry!). With Matt and Jamie Folz sharing their own car, one half of the OOWF World Tag Team Champions, The Crusher Stan Fulton, shares his car (Fulton’s 2018 bright yellow Kia Soul [he calls it “The School Bus!”]) with Mai Muyo.

MM: “This is nice, Stan. We get a long drive to catch up. We haven’t had much of a chance to talk since you came back. Other than that rooftop.”

SF: “I’m just glad you sided with us, Mai. I wouldn’t want to face you in or out of the ring. For many reasons.”

MM: “Because you know I can kick your ass.”

Fulton smiles.

SF: “Yeah. That’s the first reason.”

They pass the time recounting ‘tales of the road’ as do most wrestlers during their windshield time. Mai contributes less and less until she’s not saying much at all.

SF: “You okay?”

MM: “Mmm hmmm. Just thinking about things. All these stories have me wondering what could have been.”

SF: “About?”

MM: “Juni. Fire. Everything.”

SF: “Well, I can only offer my opinion if you’d like it.”

MM: “You know I welcome it.”

SF: “Then here’s the thing. First, Juni’s your brother. Eventually after all of this OOWF nonsense is over with, you two will go back to the sibling relationship you had, which you can either accept or work on making better. Right now, you’re on opposite sides, but it’s just wrestling. One day it won’t matter.”

MM: “Perhaps you’re right.”

SF: “Now as for Fire. Uh, you’re on your own. No one can figure her out.”

MM: “What about Lucas?”

SF: “Not even him. God help him.”

Both laugh.

MM: “I wish we were still friends though.”

SF: “She had the chance to be with us and stand by her brother and you.”

MM: “But she reneged on a stipulation in her series with Matt.”

SF: “Right. Which means, we can never trust her word again. As far as I’m concerned, she’s worse than your brother.”

MM: “How so? Not that I mind someone thinks Juni isn’t the worst.”

SF: “Juni is who he is. He’s always looked out for himself first and foremost. Like a politician, it’s expected that he’d go back on his word if it was in his own self-interest.”

MM: “Probably true.”

Fulton gives her a look.

SF: “Probably? Anyway, Fire’s never had that reputation until now. It’s worse if you expect someone to stand by their word and they choose not to than if you don’t expect someone to and they do.”

MM: “Interesting philosophy.”

SF: “Not one of my more enlightening, but it helps to pass the two days we’ll be in this car.”

MM: “Speaking of which, we need to find a place to crash tonight.”

SF: “Check your phone. Assuming we have service. If not, there’s a walkie talkie in the glove box. I gave the other to Matt so if and when we lose contact, we check in at the top and bottom of the hour. It’s about time to check if there’s no phone service.”

MM: “Very forward thinking of you. But I have service. I’ll text Jamie to see if they know of a place.”

SF: “Book us each a room if they know of one...”

FADE

[Moosehead Jack]

<We see Banned From Everywhere, Ecosystem, Firewoman and Ghost walking down the hall>

ABFD: You mean ta tell me that Labrador hain't no island whats run by and populated with dogs?

Eco: No Bill

ABFD: You sure?

Eco: WE'VE BEEN TO LABRADOR!

JS: How did you do that?

Eco: do what?

JS: What you said was all bold!

Eco: WHAT?

ABFD: HE DONE DIDIFIED IT AGAIN!

JS: NOW YOU DID IT!

JS: AND AGAIN!

JS: AND......

ABFD: Justin, you know what this means?!?!

JS: No

ABFD: We done masterified them chere dark arts!

JS: OH NO!

ABFD: YOUS A WITCH!

JS: OH NO!

ABFD: Ohhhhhh no. Justin done soldified his soul to ol Hickray! The devil done snatchified up ol' Justin's soul and hammerlocked him straight ta hell.

JS: But, you did it too

ABFD: OH NO! OL HORNY DONE GOTIFIED HISSELF ANOTHER SOUL!

Eco: <holding the bridge of his nose> I have such a headache right now

GH: <to Fire> Can you believe this conversation is happening?

FW: You haven't spent much time around these boys, have you

GH: Thankfully, no

FW: This could literally go on for DAYS!

GH: I see you are versed in the dark arts as well

FW: my past is well known

GH: Indeed. <clears his throat> Gentlemen......

<Bill and Justin stop their lamentations>

GH: what you are seeing is merely a formatting tool.

ABFD: A four man what now?

GH: A formatting tool, it allows the writer to show when a character is using extreme emotion by showing the text in a darker, bold, font.

Eco: Kay is going to straight up murder you

ABFD: But.......who is writifyin what? How do they know what I'm sayin'?

GH: They are writing what you will OOOOOF......

<Ghost falls face first to the floor and is out for a moment, as he gets to his hands and knees Kay lands a couple of kicks to the ribs for added measure. Ghost slowly turns over and looks at Kay, Kay does the "I'm watching you" thing and slowly walks away>

Eco: Told ya

GH: Well it at least served one purpose

FW: That is?

GH: It gives the promo a place to end.......

Morgan Freeman: I wish I could tell you that that was the end of the promo, and they went merrily on their way. I wish I could tell you that - but the OOWF is no fairy tale world. This was, in fact, NOT[/i] holy shit, I can do that too WHAT THE SHIT WAS THAT? Iv'e got to talk to those boys. Anyway, This was, in fact......not......the end of the promo.

<as they get Ghost back on his feet, the lights flicker and go out for a moment>

FW: Watch out!

<the lights come back on and Beer Money, Shizuru, Mai and Shannon attack! They quickly get the advantage because they brought weapons. During the fray, Shannon and Ghost glare at one another. Ghost looks confused and angry, Shannon just defiant and angry. She folds her arms across her chest and stands and watches as Shizuru and Mai attack and beat him to the floor. Security finally shows up, but the damage has already been done. Beer Money, Shannon, Shizuru and Mai turn and walk away, leaving BFE, Eco, Fire and Ghost in bloody ruins on the floor)

Morgan Freeman: Like I said, life in the OOWF is no fairy tale world.

<fade to black>

[L!zz~]

(Kylie checks to make sure Josie is occupied in a game with Bridget and Pi and steps out of the room, pulling her phone out)

Kylie: (phone to ear paces, sighs as it goes to voicemail) Jack, it's me. Again. Would you please just text to let me..us know you are ok? Or better yet call. You don't need to speak to me, but ..(clears her throat) Josie is a mess Jack. People keep disappearing from her life. Her parents. I took her from her friends . She thinks this is her fault. That she got you in trouble. I know I can be pushy Jack..and I'm sorry. I won't push. I promise. But we're really worried about you. Josie misses you...I miss you. (Sighs) Ok...bye...(disconnecting she takes a moment before putting a smile on her face and going back to her friends and niece)

Fade

[Sportsguy]

We fade in and see Stan Fulton in the Destroyatarium wearing his Minnesota Vikings Hall of Fame shirt and Randy Moss Hall of Fame hat. He smiles at something on the TV as the other half of the OOWF Tag Team Champions Matt Folz comes limping in.

Matt: Stan.

Stan: Matt. How's the ankle?

Matt: Eh, it'll be fine by Wednesday. What are you watching?

Stan: An episode of NFL's Greatest Games.

Matt: Oooh, I love those. What game?

Stan: The 1998 NFC Wild Card Game.

Matt: 1998. Let's see, that's Packers vs..... oh fuck.

Matt looks up at the screen just in time to see this play.





Matt's face gets redder and redder as if this play happened 19 and a half seconds ago instead of 19 and a half years ago.

Matt: Stan, we technically own everything in here right?

Stan: We do.

Matt: Good.

Matt picks up a shot glass and whips it roughly 200 miles per hour against the wall as it SHATTERS on impact.

Stan: And here...we...go. I'll get you started, Jerry Rice

Matt (Ranting like a lunatic): FUCKING FUMBLED!!! Greatest receiver of all time, no one's going to touch his records but obviously indisputably fucking fumbled. RIGHT IN FRONT OF the most goddamn incompetent official in the history of sports.

Stan (Egging his partner on): Did he really though? I mean it was close.

Matt (Looking like he might have a heart attack now): CLOSE? CLOSE!!?? HIS KNEE WAS 875,000 FEET OFF THE GROUND!! TOMMY WILDER SKYDIVES FROM A LESSER DISTANCE THEN RICE'S KNEE WAS FAR FROM THE GROUND!!

Matt takes a breath as he notices Stan laughing.

Matt: Motherfucker, you were just messing with me with that 'close' bullshit weren't you?

Stan: I was.

Matt: Asshole. Why?

Stan: Because we're football fans and that's what we do. By the way, Rice did fumble, but that missed call had nothing to do with the Packers completely misplaying the coverage on that final play.

Matt (Sighing): I know. And looking at it objectively it was a great game.

Stan: It was. The end of an era too...

Matt (Nodding): Yep. Every year between 92 and 97 2 out of 3 of the Packers, Cowboys and 49ers played in the NFC Championship game. This game was the last gasp of that era. The day before the Cowboys lost to the Cardinals of all teams to definitively end that run. A week after this game Reggie retired, Holmgren left and that lead to the (shudders) Ray Rhodes Error. And 3 games into the next season Steve Young got concussed and the 49ers run was over.

Stan: Yep.

Matt: So does this count as a promo?

Stan laughs.

Stan: I think we might have to mention our opponents for this to count.

Matt: Gotcha. Hmm... Fuck them, they're not in our league, why are we continuing to waste our time with them?

Stan: Works for me.

Matt: Okay, now that that's settled: Jaime, Mai and I are grilling out some huge burgers and getting ready to watch the Hall of Fame ceremony. You in?

Stan: You know it.

The Tag Team Champions make their way to Matt's suite as we.......FADE.

[Fire-Babe]

Stank comes in to the suite later to check on Fire, who has some obvious bruising, but is too distracted by something on television. She's taking copious notes.

S: Are you okay?

FW: Huh...yeah..have you heard of the Mandela Effect?

S: What?....No...Fire--

FW: I used to think it was bullshit, but I'm watching this movie and it's...well, it's TOTALLY different than what I remember.

S: Huh?

FW: Like here....He keeps calling this creepy guy EE-gor, but I distinctly remember it being EY-gor.

S: ....

FW: Seriously, this is the third time I've watched it in three days to be sure.

S: What are you watching?

FW: Son of Frahnk-en-shteen.

S: Isn't it Frankenstein?

FW: SEE?!?! That's exactly what I mean... there's a whole subplot of them correcting the name and it's totally not here.

S: ....

FW: And the wife has a totally different--

S: Fire, we need to talk about this...this...THING you have with Eco.

FW: Lucas, don't be silly, I don't have a thing with--

S: No, I know you don't have a THING-thing. Did you hear what Stan said about you?

FW: *going back to her note taking* Which time?

S: He says we can't trust you.

FW: *still taking notes* No one should.

S: Not even me?

FW: *stops note taking* Probably not.

S: Is this a--

FW: *looking back at the screen* Wait, when did they kill EY-gor? I don't remember--

S: Fire--

FW: *looking back at Stank* Lucas....no, you probably shouldn't trust me, because I always screw up. It's only a matter of time.

S: ....

FW: As for Juni...well, I can't explain...I have my reasons.

S: Care to share those?

FW: ......I can't. Not yet, anyway. Once the board makes their decision on CEO everything will make sense. Tru--

Fire stops herself before finishing.

S: *batistalaugh* You just told me I should't trust you.

FW: Hmmm...I guess I did.

S: You are one crazy.....Wait, what move is this again?

FW: Son of Frahnken--

S: Fire...you've got your movies confused. You're thinking of "Young Frankenstein"

FW: Huh?

S: It was a spoof...making fun of this movie.

FW: I....I don't get it.

S: *taking the notebook from her* It's two different movies, Fire. No Mandela Effect.

FW: Oh.

Fire looks disappointed...and still confused. Stank tries to suppress a laugh.

S: C'mon...let's go get a drink.

FW: Okay....

They leave, walking down the hall.

S: Did you really spend three days watching this?

FADE

[Fire-Babe]

Firewoman and Stank are walking down the hall.

FW: I don't want to go in.

S: It will just take a minute, I'll grab my keys and then we can go eat.

They arrive at the Destroyitarium, and go in. Stank heads toward the back while Fire lurks in the doorway. Shizuru and Mai are at a table in the front.

SM: Look what cat dragged in.

MM: If Stank is looking for something he probably left it in my room.

Fire glares at them both.

SM: No talking? That's fine...we'll take care of that tonight in the ring. Then I can be with my Shannon.

MM: And we'll have a big ol' party back here to celebrate... Sorry, Fire, you won't be invited. Maybe Stank will tell you all about it--

Mai no sooner gets the words out than Fire has her by the throat against the bar. Shizuru comes up from behind and gets Fire in a headlock. He gets ready to throw her to the ground, when he's interrupted by Moosehead Jack coming from the storage room and slamming a glass onto the bar.

MHJ: Now now now....that is NOT how we treat ....family.

Mai and Shizuru and Fire all let go of each other, with glaring all the way around.

MHJ: Would you mind giving us the room?

Mai and Shizuru look at Moose, who indicates it wasn't a request. They relent and walk away.

MM: Maybe I'll see if Stank needs my help.

Fire starts to go after here again, but Moose gets an arm up and stops her.

MHJ: Save it for the ring.

FW: Well, look at you. Did you give up random violence for Lent?

Moose smirks and places two glasses and a bottle of "Trust Me" whiskey on the bar. He takes the lid off and pours.

MHJ: C'mon, let's have a drink.

FW: Figures. I knew you wouldn't stick to it.

MHJ: Stick to what?

FW: I said I'd come out of retirement if you stopped drinking.

MHJ: And I did.

FW: ....

MHJ: And then I started again. Kinda like you said you'd join the Saints if Matt defeated you.

Moose finishes pouring. Fire grabs one.

FW: Fuck Matt.

She slings it back and looks at Moose. Moose smiles and slings his own back.

FW: You know why I can't be here.

MHJ: Doesn't matter. You appear to have broken your word. You should probably clear out before he and Fulton get back.

S: *returning to the room* Found my keys. Oh...hey, Moose.....uh....what am I missing?

MHJ: Not a thing.

FW: Nope....ready?

Stank takes her by the arm and the two leave. Moose has another drink while he smiles.

[Moosehead Jack]

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem (#873)
Live! From St. John's Newfoundland & Labrador
August 8, 2018

BEER MONEY, SHANNON MANN, SHIZURU & MAI MUYO vs. BANNED FROM EVERHWERE, GHOSTHEAD, ECOSYSTEM & FIREWOMAN

As you might expect, this was more of a fight than a match. Everyone is in the ring fighting and Ghost has Shizuru by the throat and is about to chokeslam him to hell when Shannon nails him with a kick to the back of the head. Ghost turns around, stunned, and glares at Shannon, Shannon makes the “bring it” motion, but before Ghost can decide what he wants to do, Shizuru low blows him. Across the ring Fire and Mai are lighting one another up with chops, kicks, punches and anything else you can think of. Eco tries to come to the aid of Ghost, but Shannon catches him and tosses him from the ring. Beer Money and Banned From Everywhere are outside the ring brawling, Bill has been busted wide open by SYB and now SYB has a cable around his throat trying to choke him out. Justin makes the save, but Skurge immediately attacks him from behind.

This mayhem goes on for quite some time. Eventually we have Fire and Mai in the ring, everyone else is fighting on the outside. Mai goes for a suplex, but Fire slips free, lands on her feet and immediately pops Mai with a superkick to the back of the head. Mai goes down, Fire rolls her over then heads to the corner for the BFE. She gets to the top, but the referee is distracted by Bill trying to bludgeon SYB to death with a piece of wood from a broken table. SYB is bleeding like a stuck pig. Fire gets to the top turnbuckle and it trying to steady herself when Shizuru jumps onto the apron and hits Fire with the BLACK MIST! Fire falls onto the turnbuckle, grabs her eyes and howls in anger. Mai gets up off the mat, grabs Fire on the turnbuckle and hits the MOOSE KILLER! Mai rolls Fire up, the referee has stopped caring about SYB’s well-being so he turns around, one…….two……..THREE!
WINNERS in 20:19 – Beer Money, Shannon Mann, Shizuru & Mai Muyo

Mai and Shizuru put the boots to Fire, which draws her partners back into the ring. Shizuru and Mai bail out. It’s only now that they see Fire has been hit with the black mist. Everyone immediately turns and looks at Ghost, he looks confused, then turns around and looks at Shannon. Shannon just smiles and blows a kiss toward Ghost, but Shizuru snatches it out of the air and keeps it for himself. Shannon laughs, and Ghost is furious.

MAC FLASHER vs. MATTY ALOUETTE

“The Happy Wanderer” plays out Matty Allouette to a massive pop as the Canadian glad-hands every fan that races to the aisle and around ringside, the proud Quebecer salutes the fans once he’s inside the ring as he hops around to keep loose as Mac Flasher, and the 8-bit version of “I Get Wet” make an appearance. Mac, while beloved, is a bit less of a smiler as he passively bumps fists with a few fans before rolling into the ring. He nods at Matty, who presents Mac with a Montreal Canadiens jersey. Mac politely hands the jersey to a ringside attendant along with his Penguins hooded sweatshirt before fans convince him to return the favor. Mac hands off the sweatshirt to Matty as the bell rings thanks to the eagerness of “Junior” Hale to open the match.

Matty makes up for his lack of size in comparison to Mac with some quickness and a bit of good-natured, old-fashioned trickery as he wrenches Mac’s arm behind his back before slapping Mac’s backside with his own hand. That amuses the fans in attendance, but not Mac. Mac sighs as the two lock up again, this time with Mac backing Matty into a corner, where a clean break occurs. Matty ducks another tie-up try, before tripping Mac up from behind and starting on the arm again with a knee dropped onto the hammerlocked left arm. Matty keeps his grip while rotating on top of Mac, staying just out of the reaching guess of Mac’s right arm the whole time. Mac is finally able to stand up, with Matty on his back, and calmly walk back to the corner before depositing Matty on the top turnbuckle. Mac waits for Matty to drop down before driving a shoulder into Matty’s torso to push him back. Mac then charges with another dropped shoulder, only for Matty to leapfrog Mac as he careens into the post. Mac stumbles out and gets caught in a rollup that gets 1.

Matty springs up and soaks in the applause with Mac working his shoulder loose. Matty connects on a standing dropkick, pushing Mac into the ropes. Matty follows with another dropkick that pushes Mac over the top and onto the floor. As Mac stands, Matty tries a springboard plancha that turns disastrous as Mac catches him and powerslams him onto the announce table. With Matty dead to rights, Mac – totally distraught at the damage he caused – checks on Matty as Hale administers the count. With Hale up to 7, Mac rolls in and tries to plead with Hale to stop the count. Hale is not listening as Matty lay on the table as Hale hits 10.
WINNER (countout, 7:49), Mac Flasher.

Mac, totally beside himself, rolls out to check on Matty as OOWF officials pour out from the back. Matty does manage to stand up as Mac tries to convince Matty that the powerslam was instinct and not intent. Matty accepts the apology as the two walk back. Before heading through the curtain, Mac and Matty turn to salute the crowd and fail to see Moosehead Jack emerging from behind the curtain to brain both Mac and Matty with the OOWF World Championship before officials pull a smirking, but compliant Moose away.

STAN FULTON vs. ALEXIS DARLING

"Life is Beautiful" by Sixx AM plays Alexis Darling down to the ring. She warms up as "Fifty Goddamn Skeleton Warriors" plays one half of the OOWF World Tag Team Champions Stan Fulton down to the ring to a chorus of boos. The referee checks both competitors for weapons and calls for the bell.

Some surprisingly clean mat work from the two to start out. Armdrags lead into shoulder and wrist locks which each one gets out of easily. After a few minutes of that, Stan makes the first mistake of the match. He whips Alexis into the corner and tries for the Avalanche but Alexis moves out of the way and the big man goes crashing hard into the corner. Alexis hits a code breaker for 2. Alexis springs to the top rope and hits a missile drop kick for 2. Alexis heads to the apron and leaps over the ropes to nail Stan with a senton. She waits for Stan to get to his knees and then hits him with a Shining Wizard. Alexis covers for a very close 2 count. Alexis whips Stan off the ropes and hits a beautiful looking spinning heel kick. Alexis heads up top and looks to finish with a Shooting Star Press but Stan moves out of the way and Alexis falls awkwardly to the mat. Alexis immediately grabs her ankle and grimaces in pain.

Stan decides to slow Alexis down by nailing a few kicks to Alexis's ankle, then drops an elbow across the inside of her ankle and torques trying for a submission. Alexis reaches the ropes and Stan breaks. Stan gets to his feet and pulls Alexis back to the middle of the ring and again tries to drop all 370 pounds down hard onto Alexis's ankle. Stan, depending on your perspective, either tries to pay homage to or outright steals from his tag team partner and places Alexis in an anklelock. Alexis barely makes it to the ropes and Stan immediately drags her back to the center of the ring and attempts another anklelock. This time however Alexis uses her free leg to kick Stan off and stagger him back. Stan charges forward and Alexis takes him down with a drop toe hold. Alexis with two elbows to the back of Stan's head and then she pulls herself up using the ropes. She waits for Stan to get up and nails him with an enziguiri. Alexis is working on adrenaline now and tries to get him up for the Bitch Killer. Unfortunately she can't get him up and her ankle completely collapses. Stan heads up top and nails the Crusher for the 3 count.
WINNER (Pinfall, 10:12) Stan Fulton

STANK & ZED vs. BRIDGET O’MALLEY & KYLIE MIGNOLIO

For nearly half an hour this remained a surprisingly clean and competitive match. Kylie and Bridget work well as a team, keeping Zed in the ring for a long stretch and cutting the ring off while working on his back. BRICK~! encourages Zed and Zed finally makes the hot tag to Stank, which the people cheer because it’s been such a clean match. Stank changes that immediately. He grabs Kylie and rakes her eyes, then slams her between the eyes with a headbutt. Stank throws her over the top rope to the floor, where Zed immediately attacks, hammering her with punches, then throwing her into the stairs.

Inside the ring Stank and Bridget fight it out, Bridget has Stank on the ropes until he catches her with a low blow. Bridget doubles over in pain and Stank throws her out of the ring as Zed throws a dazed Kylie into the ring. Stank pulls her up and whips her into the heel corner, Stank then charges in and KILLS Kylie with a running knee strike to the face. Kylie falls to the mat, Stank tags Zed in, Zed hits the GTH and covers, one…..two……WHAM! Bridget brings a chair down right on the back of Zed’s head. Stank starts into the ring and he catches a chair upside the head and falls out of the ring to the floor. Bridget stands over Zed, who tries to beg off, Bridget raises the chair over her head and starts to bring it down, but BRICK~! and Stank pull Zed to safety and the trio beats a hasty retreat up the ramp. Bridget checks on Kylie who is still dazed, but starting to come around. The referee obviously had no choice but to disqualify Bridget & Kylie, and the fans are not happy about that.
WINNERS by disqualification in 32:04 – Stank & Zed

TAVIAN DRACUL vs. MOOSEHEAD JACK

Tavian is out first and starts throwing plunder into the ring. The referee, knowing who his opponent is, allows it. “Scarecrow” plays and the OOWF World Heavyweight champion makes his way to the ring and the crowd absolutely boos the shit out of him. Moose drops the title on the announce table and slides into the ring and attacks Tavian as Tavian attacks him, and this is ON!

There is no wrestling in this match, Moose mostly dominates beating Tavian from pillar to post until he is a bloody mess. The crowd actually starts a TA-VI-AN chant and that fires Tavian up. He catches Moose with a kendo stick shot to the face, drawing blood, then grabs Moose and hits an ACID DROP on a garbage can! Tavian is feeling it now, he covers Moose, but Jack kicks out at two. Moose starts to get to his feet as Tavian heads to the corner, he has the kendo stick in his hand, he turns and leaps at Moose, and Moose has a light tube and he SMASHES it across Tavian’s face while he is in mid air! Moose grabs him and hits the GTSF, then pulls a piece of plywood with barbed wire stapled to it from under the ring, slides it in the ring and hits a PACKAGE PILEDRIVER through the barbed wire. Moose covers Tavian, one…..two……three.
WINNER in 9:10 –Moosehead Jack

Moose grabs the mic and pulls a barely conscious Tavian to his knees and holds him by the hair so you can clearly see his bloody face. He hammers him a few times with the mic, then speaks

This what you want Mac? Is THIS what you need? This is what you want to prove yourself, right? To show the world how tough you are, how you can beat the mighty Moosehead Jack at his own game? Well guess what Mac………………….too fuckin’ bad

Moose drops Tavian and the mic, leaves the ring and grabs his title and heads to the back while the crowd boos the shit out of him. As Moose is about to go through the curtain, Mac attacks him and the two brawl for a bit, but security is quickly out to separate the two.

ALEXANDER DARLING vs. MATT FOLZ – 90 Minute Time Limit

Russ: Well, folks, this main event should have everything the bloodthirsty fans of OOWF should want. There's no love lost here, between Matthew Folz and Alexander Darling, even though they have had minor truces through their common time here. You can bet that Alex will be taking his anger at Moose out on Folz, since there is a no contact order between the two.

Razz: Moose is definitely Alex's main target, but I gotta admit, that I'm impressed that both men have held to the administration's rules.

Russ: Yes, but if we were to look ahead, I can't help but think that Moose is going to be the victor there. Alex is back but still seems like his attention is divided.

Razz: Much like ours is. Focus on the match in front of us, although if you're right, Matt should win.

Russ: Either way, they're not known for their subtlety, and will likely use the whole 90 minutes just for the fun off it.

Razz: We're about to find out.

The trademark "There can be only one" plays and the spotlight's shine on Alexander Darling at the top of the ramp, waiting for his cue. "Do not test me" and "King of the World" plays and Alexander slow-walks down the ramp, nodding to his "subjects." He soaks up the boos, absorbing the energy to get him all charged up and ready to good. Good thing to, as just as he gets into the ring, "Battle Without Honor or Humanity" starts and Matt Folz makes his entrances as well. He likewise slow-walks. No one wants to waste their energy on a run down the ramp. More boos. Only the OOWF would pit heel vs. heel two weeks in a row, and while they may be booing, no one is leaving either. The two square up and start to pace around each other after the bell rings, neither wanting to make the first move. The tension rises.....rises....and then the two men spontaneously collide.

For the next hour we get a classic brawl, with a good deal of back and forth and periods of one man having the advantage before the other gets a burst of adrenaline, and taking over. They use every inch of the mat, all four ringposts, and the entire area around the ring on the floor. Folz gets bloodied first, as Darling slams him face-first into the steel steps repeatedly before rolling him back into the ring. He goes for a pin, but Folz somehow finds the energy to get a shoulder up in time.

And on it goes, with many near falls and potentially career ending spots, much less match-ending ones. Folz follows Darling up the ring post and after exchanging some blows, Darling pushes him off and down to the mat. Darling sizes up the situation, and flies, but he took too long, so Folz rolls out of the way. All the way out of they way and to the floor. Darling spots him and TOPE CON HILO driving Folz against the barricade. He knees him a few times for good measure and whips him toward the ring post, but Folz puts on the breaks. He wraps Darling up into a T-BONE SUPLEX into the Russian "Ukrainian" announce table! Folz took a bit of that too, and both men are entangled in the various wires and debris of a collapsed table. The referee starts to count, but kind of slowly as he's trying to figure out if either of them are still alive. Eventually, both men start to stir, to the relief of many. They stagger to their feet and each go to opposite sides of the ring to claw their way in, ending the count at 19.

On their feet, we see Darling has finally been bloodied too, a trickle running from a cut over his eye, and from his mouth, too. The referee double checks both of them, and with a quick check of the clock tells them they have 20 more minutes. Both men take a deep breath and finally decide that they should try to put the other one away. They circle, more as a way to try and catch their breath than anything else. Again, they collide, and it's almost as if they've just started, collar-and-elbow lock up series, arm drag series, exchanging suplexes....Time is winding down....Folz gets Darling into a surprise ankle lock. Darling thrashes around a bit and then rolls and kicks Folz back. Folz staggers back into the ring post and quickly scales it, turns and attempts a TOP ROPE DIVING HEADBUTT~! Darling had gotten to his feet, though, and grabs Folz at the neck and plants him into the mat. He tries for a pin, but Folz kicks out at 2. Darling gets to his feet, but not quickly enough. Folz gets to his feet and chops Darling hard, spinning him around and into the TAZMISSION~! He drags Darling down to the mat and has it locked it really well. From somewhere, Darling digs deep and plants his feet and is able to push backward, so Folz's shoulders are down....ONE...TWO...NOOOO, Folz is able to push back, still has the hold on....once more Darling pushes back and pins Folz's shoulders....one....two...NOPE, Folz rallies again! Darling's face is turning red as the blood flow is slowly cut off. Once more he makes a huge effort and pushes back to pin Folz's shoulders, one....

BZZZZT~!

The bell sounds! We have another draw! The referee tries to get Folz to release his hold and eventually he's successful. Not because Folz relented, but because he was too drained to keep the hold on any longer.
WINNER – 90 minute time limit draw

Folz looks down at Darling and nearly falls out of the ring. The rest of the Saints come out to help him to the back. Moose walks up to the ropes where Alex is laying and looks him right in the eyes. A battered Alex stares back at Jack, then slowly flips him the double bird. Moose is about to jump into the ring, but Stank and Stan pull him off the apron and they head to the back. Alex gets to his feet in the middle of the ring as Alexis gets there to help him, and we fade to black.

Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action be sure to check out the OOWF Hell on Earth 14, September 29, LIVE! from Asheville, North Carolina! And don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem, Live! August 15th live! from Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island!

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