[Jack Quinn]

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem/OOWF Invitational Round 2 (#902)
Live! From Provo, Utah
February 13. 2019

OOWF Invitational – Round 2

(1)Matt Folz vs. Sebastian Davis(
(4)Alexis Darling vs. Zed(12)
(2)Shizuru* vs. John Law(10)
(3)Mama Juana vs. Alexander Darling(11)

Jack Bullet vs. Nick Fleming
Beverly Cambridge & Mac Flasher vs. Kylie Mignolio & Bridget O’Malley
Banned From Everywhere vs. Clan Quinn

*replacing Stan Fulton


Card subject to Mormon conversion therapy

[Fire-Babe]

Fire and Josie are shopping. Moose appears to be tagging along. They come to an old thrift store with the sliding glass doors and predictably, they won't open for Fire or Moose.

FW: Kid, you're up.

Josie: Yes!

Josie walks up to the door and it opens quickly and widely for her. She skips in and Fire follows. Moose follows as well, except he almost gets caught at the door. At the last minute, Lucky appears to help with the door situation. Moose gives him a look that says "really?" and Lucky just shrugs.

MHJ: I see now why you let her tag along.

FW: Whatever...Okay, Josie, we're looking for something to put a soul in.

Josie: You mean Unca Jack's.....

Josie starts to frown a bit.

FW: Well, yeah, I don't want to lose it, or get it dirty, right? That wouldn't be very nice.

Josie: So....you're taking good care of it?

FW: Of course....

Josie *brightly* Okay!

Josie skips away and Moose and Lucky glare at Fire.

FW: WHAT?

L: Lying to a child will not get those doors to open up for you any time soon.

FW: We'll just see about that.

Josie returns with a cremation urn.

J: What about this?

FW: Mmmm....I think it's been done.

Fire and Josie continue seriously looking while Lucky and Moose do their best Paul Bearer imitations. Fire looks through a number of jewelry boxes and the like, but none seem quite right.

MHJ: This is so entertaining--

FW: You didn't have to come along.

MHJ: I was bored.

FW: In fact, you weren't invited at all, so why are you here?

MHJ: I have a proposition for you.

FW: No.

MHJ: Don't you even want to hear it?

FW: No.

MHJ: Well, why the heck not?

Fire starts to answer when Josie comes skipping up with a locket in her hand.



FW: Ooooo.....that's beautiful....but I don't--

Josie: Lookie....it opens up!

Josie struggles to open it. Lucky absent-mindedly is checking out old books when he looks up and sees what she's doing and his eyes grow wide with fear.

L: NO! JOSIE DON'T!

He rushes towards her to take the locket, but he's too late. Josie opens the locket....AND THE BEAST POPS OUT!

Josie squeals in delight. Lucky immediately drops and curls up in a fetal position. The Beast laughs at Lucky and then turns toward Josie, who starts to think this isn't just a fun little trick. He advances but Fire puts herself immediately in between the Beast and Josie.

FW: Nope...not today!

The Beast, who doesn't care who he beats up, just so he does, attacks Fire. Even though she's ready for it, it's been awhile since anyone let him loose, so he overwhelms her quickly. Josie screams and runs to hide behind a cowering Lucky. The Beast is so focused on Fire that he doesn't notice Moose come up behind him. Moose grabs his shoulder and spins him around, landing a right cross and then pulling him into a DDT. Fire recovers and the Beast stands and looks between Fire and Moose several times.

Beast: Two Quinns? No way, dudes.

The Beast heads toward another display of items and disappears. Josie comes out from behind Lucky, who is still cowering.

Josie: WHHOOOOOOOOOAAAAA....that was--

FW: Something that did NOT happen and we will not be telling Kylie or Bev about that, okay?

Josie: .....

FW: We'll go for ice cream if you promise.

Josie: Okay for ice cream!!

FW: Wonderful...*to Lucky*...he's gone, you can get up.

L: Okay, it's just.... he.... I remember--

FW: Yes, me too, but you're fine now. I gotta go pay for this and then I'll buy you ice cream too.

L: I'm not a 5 year old girl.

FW: Are you sure?

L: Yes...but, I do like Raspberry Mocha Chip.

FW: Fine....*to Moose*... You can get your own ice cream.

MHJ: I just saved you from a Beast attack.

FW: FINE, ice cream on me, all the way around, let's just go....

They head towards the check out.

MHJ: You know, I've never seen the Beast back down from anyone.

FW: Yeah, well, I guess two Quinns was too much for him.

MHJ: So about that proposal...

FADE

[Road Warrior Shark]

~~~ Outside the OOWF Arena in beautiful, downtown Provo, Utah (Cheap Pop) Onslaught Champion Sebastian Davis is standing with SFJ #44, title slung over his shoulder. ~~~

SFJ #44: Sebastian, congratulations on advancing in the Invitational.

Davis: I told you so. Although i was impressed by Bridget this past Wednesday.

SFJ #44: Oh really?

Davis: Yes. She showed up, even though she Knew she had no shot at winning. That's shows bravery, determination, guts, stupidity, whatever.

SFJ #44: So moving forward, the next round has you facing the top seed, Former World Champion Matt Folz.

Davis: Oh yes. I can hear his whiny voice now. "I'm a Grand Slam Champion, who are you?" Or perhaps it will be "I was the first person to do this, that and the other thing no one remembers, so what have you done?"

SFJ #44: He does have an impressive resume.

Davis: I think you should look up the definition of the word "impressive". Sure, he's won a few matches here and there. Folz's name is all over the record books. Problem is, none of it matters. Sure, he's a tag team champion right now, but that is basically by default. Other than that, when was the last time you were relevant Matt? 2013? You're a joke.

SFJ #44: He and Fulton lost the titles at New Year's Evil

Davis: See? So irrelevant I can't even remember you losing the titles! Yeah, I might be new, but I've come in and done basically everything I said I was going to. I've beaten former champions, Matt. You don't impress me in the least. Hell, you're probably not even the most talented wrestler in your own damn family. Where is Lindsay these days?

So come, Wednesday, you and I, we get in the ring. And I put you in your place, back to your irrelevance. You see, I'm winning the Invitational. I will become OOWF World Champion. I am The Best. And That, Mr. Jamie McAllister, is Guar. An. Teed.

~~~ Davis turns to leave. He grabs the door handle, but it swings open in front of him. He watches Matt Folz walk out of the arena and just smirks. Folz ignores him completely. Fade ~~~

[Jack Quinn]

<Moose is heading for the door to make the trip to Provo when he spots Stan Fulton coming out of GM the Danny's office carrying a large stack of paperwork. Fulton closes the door behind him, sighs and picks up his bag>

MHJ: Crush!

SF: <extending his hand> Jack

MHJ: <picking up that something isn't right> What's going on?

SF: Just getting some paperwork done before I head to Minnesota

MHJ: You mean Utah

SF: <looking at Moose and smirking> Nope. Minnesota

MHJ: I'm not following you here.......

SF: <sighing> I'm done

MHJ: What do you mean done

SF: I asked for, and received, my release

MHJ: WHAT?

SF: I need to clear my head Jack.......I feel like I'm heading down a really dark road again.

MHJ: I see

<a long awkward silence passes between them, Fulton finally breaks the mood by holding out his hand, Moose looks at him and shakes it>

SF: Thank you sensei. If you need me, for anything, you know how to get hold of me

MHJ: Yeah. Take care Crush, get yourself better

<Stan turns and heads toward the door. Moose stands there and watches him go, a strange expression on his face. We hear someone clapping sarcastically. The camera pans around and we see it's Alexander Darling>

AD: Well, wasn't THAT one hell of a performance! Could have been a Lifetime Movie right there. Moose loses his muscle

MHJ: Darling, I'm fucking warning you......

AD: You know Jack, you fucked with everything I've ever cared about. My family, every faction I've ever worked with, you've gone out of your way to make my life miserable, you've gone to great lengths to take everything from me that I ever cared about. I've sat and thought about it and I decided the greatest thing I could do was take away what you love the most.......the Saints.

Now, I wish I could tell you I was behind LD Williams being released, but that wasn't me. I wish I had been the one to tear up Stank's knee, but that wasn't me either. I wish I had been the one to force Fulton to go home, but that wasn't me either.

MHJ: <snarling> So I guess you are just an all around failure.....

AD: Oh, quite the contrary Jackie. I didn't HAVE to engineer ANY of this! I didn't have to go through the trouble, or the scheming, or any of the bullshit involved with ruining your life. I just sat back and watched them all fall. One by one. And now? What does Folz need the Saints for? Folz isn't going to play second fiddle to you and Fire. And Fire? <laughing> Do you really think she is going to stay on that sinking ship? A sinking ship she didn't want to be on in the first place? A sinking ship YOU FORCED her to be on? She resents you Jack.

Face it Jackie, it's all coming apart for you. You said something interesting the other day, you said that Fleming wasn't the one to end you for good. That your story wasn't ready to end because we weren't in some shitty high school gym. Well let me tell you something Jack, the Saints are gone, and after I beat you, your time here in the OOWF will be over. I am sending you through that door Jackie, right to the fate you have fucking earned.

<Darling spits on the ground near Moose, then turns and walks away, leaving Moose stunned as we fade to black>

[Jack Quinn]

<Moose turns around and heads back down the hall. He comes to the Destroyitarium and heads inside. Predictably, it is empty as everyone has either left, or is packing up to go. Moose turns and locks the door, then wanders around, looking at the pictures of Saints glory. He walks by the trophy case where the Saints awards are displayed. Jack walks up to the bar, where there is now a bottle of whiskey and a cigar that wasn't there before. Moose smirks and lights the cigar and takes a long drag, then opens the whiskey and takes a long drink. Moose sighs heavily and puts his head down for a moment, then he suddenly lifts his head, then cocks is slightly as if listening to something only he can hear. Moose gets up and walks around the bar and grabs a glass. He gets back to his bottle and pours a full glass>

MHJ: I've been expecting you.

<fade>

[Sportsguy]

Fade in to Stan Fulton walking to his car when he hears a voice behind him.

"Getting out before you had to face me in the finals? Chicken shit"

Stan smiles and turns to see Matt and Jaime Folz. He kisses Jaime on the cheek before giving Matt a Manly Hug of Mutual Respect.

Matt: So is this just a leave of absence or...

Stan: I'm done Matt. I don't want to endanger you or the rest of the Saints by continuing when I'm no longer at my best physically or mentally.

Matt nods.

Matt: I get it. You don't owe anyone an explanation, you're one of the best to ever do this. I won't try to change your mind, but I will say I'm going to miss you.

Jaime: We both will.

Stan: Thank you. I'll miss both of you. Just one thing I've never been able to figure out..... (Smiling)Jaime, what the HELL do you see in this guy?

Jaime (laughing): I'll let you know when I figure it out myself.

Stan: Fair enough. Seriously, good luck in the Invitational Matt, I'll be watching and rooting for you.

Matt: Thank you.

Stan: Jaime, keep him out of trouble.

Jaime: Probably impossible but I'll try.

Matt: Guess there's just one more thing left to say to you.

Stan: What's that?

Matt: Go Pack Go.

Stan laughs.

Stan: SKOL.

The Former Tag Team Champions fist bump before Stan gets in his car and we.......FADE

[Leo]

Victor DeNiro walks into the seediest bar that ever seeded in New Mexico. He has the OOWF World Heavyweight Title over his shoulder. He scans around the room for “Silver Eagle” Jack Bullet and doesn’t find him, until he lets his eyes lower to the floor. Bullet lays slumped with his back up against the bar and an empty tequila bottle beside him. DeNiro walks over and stares down at him.

VD: You will stand in my presence.

JB: (very slurred) You will wallow on the floor in mine.
DeNiro considers this for a moment and then surprisingly sits on the floor next to Bullet.

VD: I’m doing this for two reasons. One, it’s what Danny would do. Two, I know tough love doesn’t work on you like last summer when you punched the fan.

JB: Take love out of that sentence. Take love out of everything.

Bullet picks up the bottle and tosses it across the room. He sees the belt on DeNiro’s shoulder.

JB: That’s not mine anymore.

VD: We kind of need you to be clearer on that. Are you officially vacating the title?

JB: Yes, hell yes, I’m vacating the title. The OOWF needs a better champion than me, man or woman.

VD: In that case, Danny has authorized me to tell you something and I have to say I don’t necessarily agree with him on this one. He said soon as you get yourself straightened out and you want a shot, you get it. No back of the line, and no sort of rematch clause needing to be invoked. Danny said he’s just calling it professional courtesy. Your reign has been strong, good matches, good TV.

JB: Good. I am not good.

DeNiro stands up and looks down at Bullet.

VD: I’m not a therapist. I’m just delivering the message. The winner of the OOWF Invitational will be the new champion. Let’s see if you can’t pull it together by that time.

DeNiro exits and then another shadow lays across Bullet on the floor.

JB: You can get the hell out of here now.

Voice: Is that anyway to talk to your wife.

Mama Juana crouches down on the floor.

JB: Where the hell have you been?

MJ: I could ask you the same. I gave you space because the cards said to.

JB: The cards. All your talks of angels and demons and shit. I don’t believe it.

MJ: When you first came to me, I said you would go through hell. I said you would walk through fire. However, how you came out on the other side was up to you. Whether you embraced your angle or let your devil win is on you. It’s always been on you. The cards show possible paths, not the definite course.

JB: So, are you here my angel to bring me back to the heavens?

MJ: No. I heard DeNiro said tough love doesn’t work on you, but I’m not giving you that. I’m not pulling you out of this bar, but I’ll be standing outside when you decide to leave it on your own. When you decide you’re the champion the OOWF needs.

JB: I’m sure the winner of the OOWF tournament will be better than me. How is that going?

MJ: I beat Firewoman in the first round.

JB: No shit. Who you got this week?

MJ: Alexander Darling.

JB: Put that bitch through a table.

MJ: I said Alexander, not Alexis.

JB: I know what you said.

Juana smirks and stands. She then hands down a full tequila bottle.

MJ: I hand this to you, but you choose to drink it or not.

JB: That’s no choice at all.

He pulls off the cap. The shadow over him drifts off and we FADE.

[Fire-Babe]

Victor is back in his and Danny's office, when Fire comes in, wearing her new locket.

DVD: Well, to what do we owe this honor?

FW: Vic....Danny...

DDT: ....

FW: I'm glad you asked. Now, while I am less than thrilled with losing to a glorified side-kick--

DDT: ......

FW: *eyeroll* I'm WELL AWARE that she's a legitimate wrestler, but I'm a heel so I have to disrespect my opponents. Anyway, I caught Victor's little tête-à-tête with Bullet and so I'm here to collect my belt.

DDT: ....

DVD: You're what?

FW: He vacated it, and I was the last to be in the ring with him, In fact, TECHNICALLY, he lost to me--

DVD: Via DQ.

FW: So, shouldn't *I* be champ now?

DDT: ..............

FW: I know that's not the way it's USUALLY done, but we're OOWF! We make our own rules!

DVD: No.

FW: NO? Fine, I'll compete with the winner of the IO for the belt.

DDT: ......................

DVD: Besides, you have a match Wednesday.

FW: I do?

DVD: Do you never read your email?

FW: That's Lucky's job but he's still hiding from the Beast.

DDT: ...................

FW: What? Since when?

DVD: Since Moose suggested it.

FW: But...

DVD: I figured you knew, since you're all in charge and stuff.

FW: Even if that's more than cosmetically true, you would think he would have asked me about it rather than just assume.......

DVD: Well, the card is--

FW: Subject to change. So change it.

DDT: .....

FW: I don't care how, but I am NOT teaming with my brother. Clann Quinn is dead.

Firewoman storms out.

[Jack Quinn]

<Cut to a shitty hotel somewhere between Las Cruces and Provo. Moose is sitting in a stained chair, the dark room lit only by the glow of the television. There are already several empty whiskey bottles on the table, and an ashtray full of cigar butts. The camera pans around and we see what Moose is watching

Eco: Welcome . . . to Midweek Mayhem! And welcome . . . to Ontario! (The crowd explodes with boos again.) What? Not Ontario? You mean we finally left Canada behind, for the good old U-S-of-A! (Cheers.) Well, I have to admit, that’s usually a good thing . . . unless, of course, you end up in a shithold like the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, a.k.a., America’s pussy hat.

The crowd’s booing goes nuclear. Eco walks around shaking his head.

Eco: You people are ridiculous. You give me a terrible reception, when I’m out here to give you good news. But I guess Eminem’s home state was never that nice to the gays. (Crowd groans the cheap sympathy play.) See, while you were out re-gifting old Marshall Mathers LPs, I was dealing with a couple of contract situations for two of your favorite OOWF Superstars—the heart of the Saints of Sinners, LD Williams, and my old running buddy, Beverly Cambridge.

It was a complex negotiation. On one hand, they were asking for only modest cost of living salary increases, and were even willing to accept a small cut if necessary. On the other hand . . . I didn’t want them around any more! So LD Williams? GONE! Beverly Cambridge? GONE!

<Time passes and we see Moose sitting in the Destroyitarium, once again alone. He uses his cane to hobble over the bar and grab another bottle of Trust Me. As he heads back toward the bar, the door opens and Stank limps in. The two old friends nod and Moose motions toward a table. It takes a bit, but they finally get there>

S: Ain't we a sorry sight right now?

<Moose pours a couple of drinks and they toast>

MHJ: To better days

<they clink glasses and down their shots>

MHJ: What brings you here?

S: Fire brought me up here, heading back to the states to get the knee worked on, wanted to make sure all the paperwork was in order

MHJ: You coming back?

<Moose is heading for the door to make the trip to Provo when he spots Stan Fulton coming out of GM the Danny's office carrying a large stack of paperwork. Fulton closes the door behind him, sighs and picks up his bag>

MHJ: Crush!

SF: <extending his hand> Jack

MHJ: <picking up that something isn't right> What's going on?

SF: Just getting some paperwork done before I head to Minnesota

MHJ: You mean Utah

SF: <looking at Moose and smirking> Nope. Minnesota

MHJ: I'm not following you here.......

SF: <sighing> I'm done

MHJ: What do you mean done

SF: I asked for, and received, my release

MHJ: WHAT?

SF: I need to clear my head Jack.......I feel like I'm heading down a really dark road again.

MHJ: I see

<a long awkward silence passes between them, Fulton finally breaks the mood by holding out his hand, Moose looks at him and shakes it>

SF: Thank you sensei. If you need me, for anything, you know how to get hold of me

MHJ: Yeah. Take care Crush, get yourself better

DVD: Besides, you have a match Wednesday.

FW: I do?

DVD: Do you never read your email?

FW: That's Lucky's job but he's still hiding from the Beast.

DDT: ...................

FW: What? Since when?

DVD: Since Moose suggested it.

FW: But...

DVD: I figured you knew, since you're all in charge and stuff.

FW: Even if that's more than cosmetically true, you would think he would have asked me about it rather than just assume.......

DVD: Well, the card is--

FW: Subject to change. So change it.

DDT: .....

FW: I don't care how, but I am NOT teaming with my brother. Clann Quinn is dead.

<Firewoman storms out.>

Alex: Face it Jackie, it's all coming apart for you. You said something interesting the other day, you said that Fleming wasn't the one to end you for good. That your story wasn't ready to end because we weren't in some shitty high school gym. Well let me tell you something Jack, the Saints are gone, and after I beat you, your time here in the OOWF will be over. I am sending you through that door Jackie, right to the fate you have fucking earned.

<Moose grabs another bottle of whiskey and drinks deeply. His expression never changes. He hits a button and the clip replays as we fade to black>

[Fire-Babe]

Firewoman is SKYPING~! with Stank.

S: I'm just saying that mom made your favorite.

FW: ....which is?

S: Crawdad Etouffee.

FW:....

S: What?

FW: Well, first, it's technically crawFISH etouffee.

S: Oh well--

FW: But that's not that important. The more important thing is that I HATE it.

S: You do?

FW: Yes.....nasty bottom feeders. I have an aquarium, I know what sinks to the bottom. Gross...

S: Ohh....

FW: Why did she think that was my favorite?

S: The whole New Orleans thing. She had already arranged for the ingredients before the Saints/Rams game--

FW: Which we are to never bring up again.

S: ....right, but figured it'd be nice for you anyway.

FW: Luc.....I'm not FROM New Orleans.

S: She knows that....

FW: ....

S: I mean...I think she knows that....you know, I don't know?

FW: Well, tell her I'm sorry and--

S: You can tell her yourself before you fly off to Ireland.

FW: I don't know if I'll have time. We're not even going to be close to Atlanta, before...wait, before *I* fly to Ireland? Where are you going to be?

S: I hope to be with you, but it just depends. Changes in pressure aren't great for blood clots that might be lurking about post-surgery.

Firewoman pouts.

S: Don't pout, woman, I can't stand that.

FW: Come here and make me.

S: See, that's not pouting, I see that gleam in your eye.....does this mean you miss me?

FW: Yeah...since Stan left, the Destroyitarium is pretty quiet.

S: Yeah...about that....

FW: What?

S: Fire...what is wrong with teaming with Moose?

FW: Nothing.

S: Nothing?

FW: No, it's always a good time.

S: *clearly frustrated* ... then WHY are you being so difficult about it?

FW: I'm not being--

S: ....

FW: Okay, okay...look, there's still a few things surrounding my...there's some things I have to be sure to .... Look, just some things.

S: You two ALWAYS have things.

FW: Alex was right.

S: I hate those words.

FW: He was. Moose had to trick and force me to join the Saints--

S: That was Folz.

FW: With Moose's blessing. He just doesn't get how much I hate being forced into anything, and he didn't even ASK if he thought it was time to team up. Maybe I want to keep going after Bullet's world championship! He didn't even ask before he--

S: Bullet vacated that championship, thanks to you.

FW: Which is why I should have a shot now, not be bogged down in some tag team--

S: Bogged down?

FW: That's not what I meant....

S: Woman, if I were there I would make you and your brother sit down together--

FW: Again.

S: AGAIN, and get this shit sorted out. Didn't you see his talk with Beverly?

FW: No....?

S: Well go find it. And then go find him and tell him how DELIGHTED you'd be to be his tag team partner. Whatever other shit you guys got to go through, you're "<df>some things</df>" can wait.

FW: Oh yeah?

S: YEAH!

FW: .....and what if I didn't.

S: Huh?

FW: Would you punish me?

S: ....don't go there.

FW: Would you... spank me?

S: Woman.....that is NOT fair.

FW: I know.

S: Lisa, you only have one brother left.  Your cousin is MIA.  You have no idea where your other family is, as shitty as they are....You and he are all each other has. Don't blow it.

FADE

[Sportsguy]

We fade in to Matt Folz.

Matt: Sebastian Davis, sorry it's taken me this long to respond to you. This weather has fucked with my head to the point where I just want to curl up under my down comforter and sleep. Moving on...

I don't blame you for being an arrogant as all hell Onslaught Champion. Shit, at this same point of my career holding that same Championship, I was probably twice as arrogant as you. And much like yourself I felt I was completely justified in being so. Also you're right about my voice... to quote from one of my favorite sports books of all time "He has the kind of voice where even when he isn't whining, he SOUNDS like he's whining.". And respect to you for doing your research about my family, Lindsay was well before your time here. Way to do your homework. To answer your question Lindsay is at home in Australia happy in a new relationship.

The rest of your promo though.....not so great. See I'm not just A Grand Slam Champion, I'm a 2 time Grand Slam Champion. And I'm one World Championship away from becoming a 3 time Grand Slam Champion, which is why this Invitational is so important to me. And your question to when the last time I was relevant? Let's see... Longest Tag Team Championship reign in company history, was part of the match that ended Eco's time here in the company, number one seed in the Invitational...I'm going to say pretty fucking recently. And yes, you've defeated former champions. Good for you. But did you go move for move for over an hour with the best to ever do this and come out on top? Did you go 20 minutes in ice and snow and sub zero temperatures and win the World Championship in a street fight? Have you been part of 3 different match of the year winners? Did you lose half the fucking blood in your body barely beating Firewoman in a match that SHOULD have been match of the year? Don't get me wrong, you're a damn talented wrestler and someday you COULD be great. But that time and place isn't going to be in the ring tomorrow evening.

FADE

[Leo]

Mama Juana enters the office of Danny Taylor with Victor DeNiro at his side.

MJ: I want you to give Jack Bullet a match tonight.

VD (translating for Danny): A little last minute don't you think.

MJ: I've been trying to let him find his own path, but that doesn't mean I can't clear some ways for him.

VD (translating for Danny): How can we be sure he'll even show up.

MJ: Oh, he'll be here. I'm making sure the path will be clear for that as well.

VD (translating for Danny): And who should we give him at the last minute?

MJ: Nick Fleming isn't booked and he faced Bullet at his best. Let's see what he does at this worst.

VD (translating for Danny): Okay, done. But, if Bullet doesn't show. We'll be hard pressed to give him another chance.

MJ: Just showing up will be the least of anyone's worries.

Juana exits. Danny turns to DeNiro and signs.

VD: Yeah, I don't like how she said that last part either.

[Leo]

"Silver Eagle" Jack Bullet is lying in the back of a 1978 Cadillac El Dorado. It's littered with fast food wrappers and bootleg OOWF merchandise. Carl from Fresno is flying down the road, honking his horn for people to get out of the way. Bullet starts to stir and assess his surroundings.

JB: What the hell am I doing here?

CF: Ah, that's what the people at home are probably asking. 'What is Jack Bullet on a week long bender doing in the back of Carl from Fresno's car racing toward tonight's Midweek Mayhem at the Marriott Center in Provo, Utah. Really, what are any of us...

JB: Shut the hell up! I think I'm going to be sick.

CF: I'd tell you not to puke in my car, but it's not like you'd be the first.

JB: Why are you taking me to the show. I'm not booked.

CF: Ah, Mama Juana called me. She got you a last minute booking. Said it'd be good for you. You're facing Nick Fleming.

JB: Nick Fleming can choke on a bag of dicks.

CF: That's the spirit! You've got to get back on that horse and ride it.

JB: Fine. Nick Fleming can choke on a bag of horse dicks.

CF: Look are you the Jack Bullet who lost his soul to Firewoman or the Jack Bullet who was one of the most successful OOWF World Champions in recent history.

JB: How about neither.

CF: So, what other Jack Bullet's can you be?

JB: How about the Jack Bullet that let everybody down. The Jack Bullet who makes little children cry. The Jack Bullet who put two wrestlers in the hospital to proved what a fucking man he was.

CF: Okay, be that guy. But we all have to be somebody.

JB: Well, ain't that just a poster for my wall with a kitten stuck in a tree. Why don't...

Bullet bends over and throws up as we FADE.

[DrMcAwesome]

*as MAC FLASHER and BRIDGET O’MALLEY bump into each other in the Hallway of Random Encounters, a rested and recently returning SHIZURU-MUNE MANGYUNIKU-COX randomly encounters the pair*

MAC: “Sizzlechest. Where the hell have you been? Almost everyone here has been trying to get in touch with you since Thursday.”

SHIZURU: “Well, I saw I wasn’t on the card this week, so I cashed in some time off and went on a bit of a sightseeing tour of Utah.”

BRIDGET: “That’s why we wanted to get at you. You’re on the card. You’re in the Invitational now!”

S: “Wait … How. I wasn’t part of the initial 16.”

BO’M: “‘Crusher’ left. Danny Taylor slotted you into his spot.”

S: “Wow. I guess that’s cool. I wasn’t really studying the bracket, so … I’m getting Zed? Alexis Darling? Sebastian Davis?”

MF: “John Law.”

*SHIZURU’s eyes pop*

S: “Perfect! Looks like I have a match to win and an asshole to beat down.”

*SHIZURU departs*

MF: “Should we have told him what the winner of the Invitational gets now since Jack Bullet vacated the OOWF Championship?”

*SHIZURU sprints back into the conversation*

S: “So the winner gets …”

BO’M: “Yup.”

S: “Perfect!”

*SHIZURU exits the conversation a second time*

MF: “So … Ummmm … Good luck tonight. You’ll need it.”

BO’M: “Happy Valentine’s Day Eve, Mac.”

*BRIDGET kisses MAC*

BO’M: “Just know that I’ll make a bitch tap regardless of who he’s dating, dear.”

*BRIDGET spots KYLIE MIGNOLIO and exits the area to discuss strategy for their match against MAC and BEVERLY CAMBRIDGE*

MF: “Well … At least she called me ‘dear’.”

*MAC continues stretching as the scene fades*

[DrMcAwesome]

*JOHN LAW stands in front of the OOWF Interview Banner with SEXY FEMALE JOURNALIST 5-0*

SFJ5-0: “John Law, you were supposed to meet ‘The Crusher’ Stan Fulton in tonight’s quarterfinal, but instead, you face Shizuru. Your thoughts?”

JOHN (while grabbing the microphone and shooing SFJ 5-0 out of the shot): “Figures. I finally get someone in OOWF with a bit of a backbone, and then he’s gone and I get a guy I already beat twice in his place. It really doesn’t matter who they put across the ring from me. Tonight, I take one step ahead in my quest to become OOWF World Champion. The smartest thing that Jack Bullet could have done was forfeit the championship, knowing that he’d have to face me. Now that he’s wised up, I see seven people who are going to be disappointed, and broken by John Law. Shizuru, you’ve got the golden ticket. You didn’t earn this spot, but here you are. You’ve already fallen to me twice. This time, there’s a purpose to how I’m going to beat you down. You’re a message. You’re an example.

“If you leave now, nobody will blame you. If you stay and try to be a hero, you’ll go out on my shield. A shield that tells you – and the world – that there is no justice, just pain.”

*JOHN throws the microphone down and exits as the scene fades*

[Jack Quinn]

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem/OOWF Invitational Round 2 (#902)
Live! From Provo, Utah
February 13. 2019

CLAN QUINN vs. BANNED FROM EVERYWHERE

BFE is out first and the crowd cheers loudly for them. Clan Quinn’s music plays and Moose storms the ring, while a less enthusiastic Fire makes her way to the ring. Moose slides under the bottom rope, and nails Bill with a punch between the eyes, then throws him over the top rope to the floor. Justin grabs Moose and lands a couple of punches, but Moose rakes his eyes and sends him to the corner and kills him with a clothesline.

Moose keeps the advantage for a bit, Fire stands in the corner looking completely disinterested. Eventually the numbers prevail and Bill and Justin regain the advantage. They keep Moose on their side of the ring and give him a proper beating, much to the delight of the crowd. After several near falls, Moose finally tags in Fire, basically by forcing the tag. Fire comes in and goes through the motions initially, but when Justin reverses a whip and pops Fire with a superkick to the jaw that sends her over the top rope to the floor, something snaps. Fire slides back into the ring and all hell breaks loose. Fire takes the fight to both Justin and Bill, and Moose joins in and we have a proper out of control brawl.

The referee tries to maintain control, but there is no chance of this coming back into the ring. Fire and Moose put Justin and Bill through tables, and hammer them until they are a bloody mess. Finally the referee has no choice but to throw the match out.
WINNERS – No Contest in 20:31

Moose and Fire back up the ramp with a crazed look in their eyes. They get to the top and bump knuckles

Russ: Are these two finally on the same page?
Razz: God, I hope not!

NICK FLEMING vs. JACK BULLET

Mike Elevenbee stands in the ring with a general crowd hum behind him.

ME: Introducing first at a weight of 235 pounds, Nick Fleming.

Fleming enters to no music, walks to the ring and steps inside the squared circle.

ME: And his opponent, at 215 pounds from Des Moines, Iowa, “Silver Eagle” Jack Bullet.

Russ: These two men recently fought over the OOWF World Title, but both have fallen on hard times since then.

Razz: Well, nobody has fallen harder than Jack Bullet. After Firewoman goaded him into the Punch Heard Around the World, he crawled into a bottle and hasn’t come out.

Russ: He’s been announced, but Jack Bullet is nowhere to be seen.

“Stanglehold” by Ted Nugent plays, but Bullet doesn’t emerge from the back. The crowd is confused. Fleming takes the microphone from Elvenbee.

NF: Everything I said before about Jack Bullet is true. He’s no hero, no champion and not worthy to ever hold the OOWF World Championship again. So I demand a count out victory right now, so I can begin my way to the title I should have held all along.

Referee Junior Hale shrugs and starts counting. One…two…three…

The crowd stirs and the camera pans to find Jack Bullet tripping down the stairs through the crowd. He’s wearing blue jeans and cowboy boots with a dirty white dress shirt completely unbuttoned and the sleeves rolled up. He could go tumbling down the steps at any minute.

Russ: Jack Bullet is here, physically. Mentally might be another story.

Razz: I can smell him from here. He smells like tequila and depression.

Russ: So, he smells like you in college.

Bullet flips over the guardrail, lands on the floor with a flop and then crawls under the bottom rope.

NF: I can’t believe you showed up. But, now I can get the proper win I always should have…

Bullet stumbles into Fleming and cuts him off with a forearm to the face. The crowd pops. Bullet kicks Fleming and Nick rolls to the floor. Bullet grabs the middle rope and extends under the bottom rope so he can keep kicking at Fleming. Bullet slides the rest of the way to the floor as Fleming backs off.

Russ: Bullet might be drunk, but he’s also furious.

Razz: Jack doesn’t have to worry about breaking any code tonight with Fleming. He’s all man and he just needs to get his bearings here.

Hale encourages both men to get back into the ring. He starts a double count out. Fleming tells the timekeeper to move and takes their chair. He holds it up over his head and approaches Bullet, who kicks Nick in the gut. He drops the chair. Jack gets a double underhook and hits the Silver Bullet DDT on the chair.

Bullet then yells at the announcers at the Bulgarian announce table to move. He removes monitors and clears papers off the table. Hale takes the floor and cautions Bullet not to do it. Jack shoves Junior down and yells at him to screw off.

Russ: Jack Bullet can’t put his hands on an official like that.

Razz: He doesn’t care, but I’m guessing Danny Taylor will. He’s given Bullet more leeway than he should in my opinion, for a man who basically dropped the OOWF Heavyweight Title in a trashcan.

Russ: He did not such thing.

Razz: Proverbial trashcan.

Fleming gets up and is bleeding from the forehead. Bullet tries to grab him, but Nick struggles off and backs up. He fires off a kick that catches Jack in the gut. Fleming presses forward, but Bullet backdrops him onto the floor and falls backwards with an elbow.

Russ: I think that might have just been a happy accident.

Bullet grabs the chair and drives it down into Fleming’s gut several times. He then wallops him in the head with it. Bullet grabs a microphone.

JB: I hurt those I love, I hurt those I hate. I hurt everyone. But I especially hurt those I hate. I put out Christian Carter, I put out Demon Smoke and I’m going to put out Nick Fleming. I’m no hero. I’m no champion. Fleming is right and thanks to Firewoman I’ve got no soul, so fuck it, let’s take the Express Train to Hell!!!

Fleming stands and Bullet drives the microphone into his head wound three times. It seeps more blood. Bullet tosses Fleming on the announce table. He then gets up and pulls Nick into a piledriver position. He drives Fleming through the table and it collapses.

Russ: It’s the Action Driver through the table. Fleming could have a broken neck.

Paramedics rush out from the back. Bullet wades through them, pushing them around, but then letting them go.

ME: Referee Junior Hale has disqualified Jack Bullet and has awarded this match to Nick Fleming.

Razz: Fleming finally got a win over Jack Bullet. That’s a…yay for him.

Russ: Well, probably not a win the way he would have wanted. What is going on with the former world champion. He goes from not wanting to compete to wanting to incapacitate anyone he sees. I have to ask where is Mama Juana in all this.

Razz: He told him to find his own way. Maybe this isn’t the best way, but it’s a way. Besides, she can’t worry about him when she’s got her own journey to the title possible.

Russ: Maybe she needs to invest a little more in this relationship instead of establishing herself here in the OOWF. We’ll see Juana later tonight against Alexander Darling. When we see Jack Bullet again, who knows.

Bullet trips up the ramp and disappears to the back as the scene fades.

OOWF INVITATIONAL – ROUND 2

MATT FOLZ vs. SEBASTIAN DAVIS

Davis starts out surprisingly fast, spending the first few minutes of the match keeping Matt off balance with his speed advantage. Superplex gets 2. Gordbuster and a middle rope knee drop set up a Undertow that gets a very close 2 count. Davis whips Matt into the corner and tries a big splash but Matt moves out of the way and Davis hits his shoulder hard against the ring post.

For the next few minutes, Matt works on the arm with surgical like precision. Hammerlock slam sets up a shoulderbreaker that gets two. Matt tries to propel Davis into the corner shoulder first, but Davis reverses and Matt hits his head hard on the post. Davis schoolboys for 2. Matt staggers to his feet and Davis nails him with a standing drop kick. Davis goes for the Spring Break Plunge, but do to his bad shoulder he can't get Matt up. Matt reverses it to a belly to belly suplex then drags Davis to the center of the ring and locks in a cross armbreaker for the submission.

Winner (Submission, 12:15) Matt Folz

ALEXIS DARLING vs. ZED

Great back and forth match. Lexie keeps Zed on the defensive for most of the match. The end comes when Zed traps Lexie in the Zzzzzzzz, but Lexie climbs the turnbuckle and flips backward, keeping Zed on the mat for the three count (the Bret Hart Roddy Piper finish).
WINNER in 29:44 – Alexis Darling

After the match a frustrated Zed slams the mat. Lexie, somewhat surprisingly, stays in the middle of the ring and extends her hand to Zed. Zed looks to BRICK~!, who nods. Zed gets to his feet and shakes Lexie’s hand and raises her arm in victory, popping the shit out of the crowd.

SHIZURU vs. JOHN LAW

“Shima Uta” by The Boom plays as many in Provo are still unaware that Shizuru-Mune Manguyniku-Cox is on the card for the evening. As Shizuru walks to the ring, he pauses to reflect on something only he is aware of before rolling under the ropes. He nods toward OOWF Official Davis Hightower before “Untouchable” plays out John Law, who sprints to the ring and tries to jump Shizuru, only to get cut off by Hightower.

John backs away, giving Hightower enough time to check both men before calling on the bell. John tries to grapple with Shizuru, only to have the Japanese youngster slip out of his grip each time. Unlike previous encounters, Shizuru seems to be unafraid of John, even verbally urging him to bring something better than that.

Russ: “Sizzlechest is … A tad confident tonight.”
Razz: “24 hours ago, HE didn’t know he was in this bout and what it had at stake. Now he’s the luckiest person on the roster because he’s one step closer to the OOWF Championship, without having to win in the round of 16.”

Shizuru takes John down with a headscissors, floating over and locking a bridging hammerlock on John that lasts for a short time until the action is dragged to the ropes. Hightower calls for a break, which Shizuru gives at 2. John dusts himself off and eats a dropkick, sending him over the top rope. While John lands on his feet, he’s not aware of Shizuru dropping in from behind with another dropkick, sending him into the edge of the announce table. With John doubled over, Shizuru arrives with a bulldog off Razz’s monitor that sends John reeling backward.

Razz: “Good. Good. I didn’t need that anyway. Just do you, Sizzlechest.”
Russ: “You never look at that thing anyway.”

Shizuru rolls back into the ring at Hightower’s count of 8, breaking the count long enough to head back outside and into a right hand from a busted-open John. As Shizuru staggers back, John grabs a chair and pastes Shizuru, in plain sight of Hightower, who calls for the bell.

Your winner (disqualification, 6:55), Shizuru-Mune Mangyuniku-Cox!

While Shizuru was declared the winner, he’s not feeling like a winner as John picks up the dazed victor and gives him a tour of all four ringposts. John dumps Shizuru on the steps and pulls out a zip tie, securing it around Shizuru’s wrists before booting away at his ribs. With Shizuru on his back, John tries a running senton from the apron, only to get a spineful of steel steps. Shizuru pops up and waits for John to stand before pulling back for a Dream Maker. Just as Shizuru throws the kick, OOWF Officials and Security rush in to prevent further fisticuffs. John spits at Shizuru while Shizuru is more than eager to trade verbal jabs, offering John a middle finger as he is worked free of the zip tie.

MAMA JUANA vs. ALEXANDER DARLING

"There can be only one!"

...plays and Alexander Darling emerges, and while he's sort of a default face now, given the simmering final feud with Moosehead Jack, the OOWF Universe doesn't forget and forgive easily, and they let him know it. He smirks at this and awaits Mama Juana's arrival, which brings another uncertain greeting, as she's married to the once face of the company, until his 'victory' over Firewoman, but then she's kind of mean too, so they're just confused... Anyway, they meet it he ring and off we go. We start off with Mama Juana off the chain with the flurry of offense, as if all three Furies are packed into one.

Razz: Furies?
Russ: Greek spirits of vengeance.
Razz: Oh....

Initially, Darling is overwhelmed, but Darling has also faced his fair share of evil-influenced opponents, so this is not his first rodeo. He covers in the corner, allowing MJ to wear herself out while waiting for an opening.

Russ; And there's three of them?
Razz: YES...geez, read a book once in a while.

At that opening, Alexander explodes out of the corner with series of vintage--

Razz: We can't say vintage...Michael Cole has that trademarked.
Russ: He does?

--CLASSIC, then, Darling indy-workrate suplexes, DDTS, and head drops. He tries of the cover, but each time MJ kicks out. Darling pretends to be annoyed.

Russ: Darling is just playing with this rookie, waiting to find her fatal flaw.
Razz: I thought demigods don't have fatal flaws because they're immortal?
Russ: *eyeroll*

While Alex is figuring it out, MJ doesn't want to waste time, and launches another flurry--

Razz: Are flurries different than Furies?
Russ: Please stop.
Razz: And how to Furries figure in....?
Russ: STOP!

--which culminates into a Falling Tower, planting a somewhat surprised Darling to the canvas. MJ goes up top and let's fly with a beautifully orchestrated Swanton Bomb and then scrambles over for the pin, one, two..NO, Darling kicks out with authority. He gets to his feet and finally is done playing. He trips her up to get her into The Darling Vice, but MJ is too wily, so after some struggling and countering, he changes tactics to go to the Darling Money Clip.

Russ: Alex done playing. He's broken bones and ended careers with that one, just ask Poe and D.H. Magnusson!

MJ is a lot more flexible than Poe or DH, and tolerates the hold well, but not without a great deal of pain. She doesn't tap, but she does somehow manage to reach out and JUST BARELY touch the ropes, which is enough for the break. Darling throws her leg to the mat, and decides to put the boots to her, before a quick Curbstomp (the real kind) for emphasis. He hits the ropes, and just before he indicates that it's not ANY moonsault, but Best FIRESault EVER~!

Razz: That'll piss off Moose.

He lands it, and gets a 2.888889 count before MJ kicks out. Alex argues the speed of the count, and MJ recovers enough to spin him around right into a BIG SLAP across the face. Alex has been slapped before, so he smirks as he rubs his jaw. This enrages MJ who launches herself into the far ropes and then off, knocking Alex into the ropes. She takes his feet out from under him, and then elbow drops across the throat. She pulls him up to try for a crucifix powerbomb, but Alex slides behind. He spins himself around to spin her around to for a kick to the midsection but MJ grabs his leg instead, dives under and rolls him up for a small package...One, two...THREE.
WINNER in 21:11 – Mama Juana


MAC FLASHER & BEVERLY CAMBRIDGE vs. KYLIE MIGNOLIO & BRIDGET O’MALLEY

Mac and Bev are out first. As they wait in the ring, the OOWF world tag team champions, Kylie Mignolio and Bridget O’Malley are announced. They come out to the top of the ramp and the crowd pops HUGE. As they start down the ramp though, Clan Quinn comes out from the back with chairs and NAILS them both from behind! Moose and Fire hammer Bridget and Kylie with chairs. Mac and Bev race up the ramp to save their friends, but Matt Folz comes out from the back with a chair of his own, and the Saints take out Mac and Bev as well! They turn their attention back to the champs, Fire pulls Bridget to her feet and hits a MOOSEKILLER on the stage, while Moose drops Kylie with a package piledriver! The Saints stand over the fallen while the crowd boos the ever loving shit out of them. Finally, security separates them and medical comes out to check on them as we fade to black.

Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action be sure to check out the OOWF End of Days 12, February 24th, Live! from Casper, Wyoming. And don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem Live! February 20th Live! From, Idaho Falls, Idaho