Post by Road Warrior Shark on Jun 8, 2019 10:17:55 GMT -5
~~~ SFJ #44 is standing in front of the OOWF Interview Banner with Sebastian Davis. ~~~
SFJ #44: Sebastian, you and Matt Folz interjected yourselves into each other's matches this past MidWeek Mayhem, costing you a chance at winning your match.
Davis: Listen, Matt Folz can ignore me, feign deafness when he hears my name, laugh at me all he wants. The fact of the matter is he is running scared.
SFJ #44: He is?
Davis: You saw it, not only does he have Stacy Kirkland fight his battles for him, he is now openly conspiring with Beverly Cambridge of all people. All this to avoid getting back in the ring with me. All this to try and avoid the Storm that is coming his way. The thing is, you can't outrun a Hurricane, Champ. I'm going to get you Matt Folz, one way or another. And when I do, I will take the OOWF World Championship. Guar. An. Teed.
As for Stacy Kirkland, that little witch needs to get her nose out of my business, or else I might just decide to take her title as well. Then I'd be the ... what's the phrase.... Wooo! Gnarliest Double Champ Ever!
SFJ #44: I don't think the OOWF lets you have 2 titles at once.
Davis: You think I care about the OOWF's silly rules? You think I can't bring about a change there too? I don't talk the talk, I Walk the Walk. and If I decide to go after Black Magic's Intercontinental Title, there's nothing she can do to stop me. Hell, I might go find Kieran Bourne and take the World Tag Team Titles from the Saints as well... and all because Matt Folz is scared of Sebastian Davis.
SFJ #44: So you're targeting ALL of the Saints of Sinners?
Davis: I'm saying if they get in my way, I will march right into The Destroyitarium and take whatever I want. As a matter of fact...
~~~ Davis reaches down and brandishes the Clangy Pole and stares at it wide-eyed as he runs it over in his hands ~~~
Davis: ..... I could go for a drink right about now.
~~~ Davis knocks 44's mic from her hand and heads down The Hallway (tm). ~~~
Post by Moosehead Jack on Jun 8, 2019 13:26:27 GMT -5
<Moose is walking down the Hallway of Random encounters when he sees Mac Flasher sitting on a crate lost in thought. Mac notices him, but doesn't move>
MF: Not now Jack
MHJ: <smirking> I just have a simple question for you Mac.......what do you want?
MHJ: What do YOU want.
MF: Jack, what the hell are you talking about?
MHJ: I see an OOWF champion sitting here brooding because he was forced into a match that he doesn't want, by someone in his own stable, someone that supposedly cares about him. What do YOU want
MHJ: A year ago you were the world champion, had been for over four months. You were on top of the world, and even when you lost the title to me, you demanded what YOU wanted, you wanted the death match against me, you stood up for yourself and DEMANDED what you wanted. Now?
MF: You are not going to start shit between me and Bridget
MHJ: Oh, I don't think I have to. I think I just said exactly what you're thinking. Now if you'll excuse me, there is a certain Mr. Davis who has a death wish.
We fade in and see OOWF World Heavyweight Champion Matt Folz and his lovely bride Jaime walking and talking after a relaxing day of shopping and going to a movie. We catch them in conversation about Dark Phoenix.
Jaime: What the HELL was that??
Matt: I thought it was okay as a stand alone film. The problem was it WASN'T a stand alone film. That movie took any sense of continuity, beat it with baseball bats and buried it barely alive like Joe Pesci in Goodfellas.
Jaime: Right. I mean how did the writers think they could get away with(Long string of spoilers)?
Matt: And that even wasn't the worst of it. (Long list of spoilers)
Jaime: Dinner was great though thank you hon.
Matt: The fish was great, I just wish the fries weren't that crinkle cut shit. But you're welcome my love. So what do you want to do the rest of the night? Stick in a Blu Ray?
Jaime: Nah, I have some other ideas.
Jaime smiles and leans in to whisper in her husband's ear.
Matt: Oh I very much approve of that idea.
Jaime: I thought you might.
The couple turn the corner and start to walk back to their suite. As they walk through the bar area of the Destroyatarium they see everything completely trashed, broken glass all over the place, bottles of liquor destroyed, a clangy pole through the television, etc. A very angry Moose greets them.
Moose: Where the hell have you been?
Matt: I told you, was taking a mental health day. What the FUCK happened here?
Moose: Davis. Of course the chickenshit motherfucker did it when no one was here and was gone before I could catch him.
Jaime: How do you know it was him?
Moose pulls out his phone and replays Davis' promo from earlier.
Moose: He wants to take on the full force of the Saints? Give him his wish then, let's go find Stacy and Fire and skin him alive.
Moose: Nah? What the fuck do you mean Nah?
Matt: I mean don't feed the troll. Davis literally could not be any less relevant to any of us. Look around: World Champion? Saints. Tag Champions? Saints. Intercontinental Champ? Saints. Let's not let this miserable insignificant flea make us lose focus on that. Now if he attacks any of us physically? All bets are off, of course we're well within our rights to defend ourselves or each other. But I wouldn't go out of my way to let him goad me into attacking, and possibly get injured and lose my Championship. I won't give him that satisfaction and you shouldn't either.
Moose: LOOK what he did to our property!
Matt: All of which can be replaced with one phone call to Stan and you know it. Hell, I'll probably hear from him soon anyway, the first pro football preview magazines are out. There's no way he's not going to call me and laugh his ass off about the Packers being picked last in the division. Look, if you want to go after Juni and tear his mask off... possibly his head along with it... for the aggravation of stealing your tag belts? I'm down with that.
Moose (Growling): Fire and I will take care of that ourselves.
Matt: I thought you might. Just let the record show that if you do need any help I'm willing. But Davis is just a shit talking fool with absolutely fucking NOTHING to back it up. He's not worth our time or effort. But hey, that's just my opinion. you guys do what you want.
Moose: We'll think about it. While I have you here, can I ask you something else?
Matt: Of course.
Moose: Are you building some kind of alliance with Beverly?
Matt: No. No alliance, but I do respect her. It's like back in the days of the Five: You tried to cut my throat with a scalpel, Fire tried to behead me, Poe sent me through a flaming table... two separate times actually. But LD? He joined in group attacks of course, but mostly he was content to go out to that ring against me and tear the house down. I feel the same way about Beverly now as LD did about me then: Certainly not buddy buddy but a mutual respect for one another's skills. She's earned that level of respect from me... Davis hasn't.
Moose: That makes sense.
Matt: Good, now let's get this shit cleaned up quickly. Jaime and I have plans tonight.
Moose: What are you doing?
Matt: Believe me, I have no interest in discussing it with you and you have no interest in hearing it.
Sexy Female Journalist Ichiban is with Sebastian Davis underneath the OOWF banner.
Ichiban: Sebastian Davis, you’ve lost 37 straight matches to Matt Folz for the OOWF World Title, yet demand more. Why do you have your head shoved so far up your own ass?
SD: Matt Folz beat me 37 times, but he can’t beat me 38 times. It’s a statistical fact. I need just one more match against Matt Folz to beat Matt Folz and be the world champion instead of Matt Folz.
“Silver Eagle” Jack Bullet appears behind Davis and smacks him with a steel chair. He doesn’t even flinch and keeps on talking.
SD: Matt Folz might be world champion, but I’ll be world champion instead of Matt Folz if I keep wrestling Matt Folz as there is nobody else in all of OOWF you can wrestle Matt Folz, but me, because I can wrestle Matt Folz and nobody else. Matt Folz.
Jack Bullet appears again with the clangy pole. He smashes the pole into Sebastian’s head. The pipe sticks out of his head. Sebastian doesn’t seem to mind. Bullet exits the scene again.
SD: Matt Folz. Matt Folz. Matt Folz. In closing, Matt Folz.
Bullet pours gasoline on Davis and lights a match. He throws it on Davis who goes up in a spectacular ball of flame. Davis now turns and looks at Jack.
SD: You’re not Matt Folz!
Jack Bullet wakes up in bed sweating. A person next to him turns on the light and sits up next to him. It’s Stacy Kirkland.
SK: What’s wrong my husband?
JB: Ah! We’re not married!
A body on the other side moves, turns on the lamp on the end table on that side of the bed and then sits up too. It’s Firewoman.
FW: Don’t be silly, all three of us are married and perfectly happy under the eyes of Ra.
JB: The eyes of Ra?
FW: Don’t be an idiot, you’re still dreaming and have no idea what Firewoman worships. It could be Ra, hell if you know.
Jack Bullet sits up again in bed with the lights off. He looks to his left. He looks to his right. There are no women there. He sighs and picks up the phone. He dials and we hear the voicemail come on the other end as we fade out.
VM: You’ve reached the voicemail of Dr. Dre Gaines, I’m unable to come to the phone right now, but…
Sunday morning worship lets out at the God Complex. Various people come out, including Los Defenestrators.
Ecosistema: Jesus Christ es muy buono.
El Voltaje: Si, muy buono.
As they approach their car, they are cut off by Moosehead Jack holding Happy Death Bat and Firewoman.
MJ: I’m guessing you two having something in your car trunk that belongs to us. We can do this the easy way or the hard way. I’m sure as shit hoping you choose the hard way.
Rev. BRICK~! runs out and gets in between the foursome.
BRICK~!: There’s no fighting in the God Complex.
FW: We’re not inside the building, we’re outside.
BRICK~!: God is everywhere.
FW: If your god is everyone, how come your god can only hear you inside certain designated buildings?
As BRICK~! contemplates that, a shadow is cast over them. They look up to see a man in a bright blue mask with a silver eagle over the face standing on top of a Hummer in the parking lot.
BM: It is I, the brave and daring Bullet Machine! I have come to assist my masked brothers against the foulness of Clan Quinn.
Los Defenestrators chant “Maquina de Balas” and begin doing the ‘we’re not worthy’ bowing of praise.
MJ: Jesus Christ, now Jack Bullet is playing these dumb games.
FW: That’s not Jack Bullet.
MJ: Don’t give me that again. Look, that’s Eco, that’s probably Zed in a mask and that is sure as shit Jack Bullet.
FW: My pendent isn’t glowing. That’s not Jack Bullet.
MJ: Well, if that’s not Jack Bullet then the pendent should let you kick his fool his head off.
FW: Hey, you’re right!
As Bullet Machine jumps to the ground. Fire catches him with a superkick. Moose starts swinging his bat at Los Defenestrators.
As more people come out of the church. We see Mac Flasher, Bridget O’Malley and Kylie Mignolio. They run over to help out.
MJ: This isn’t over. Bring out all the masked freaks you’d like. We’ll take those belts back that rightfully belong to us.
Jack and Fire retreat.
BM: My work here is done!
Bullet Machine disappears among the cars in the parking lot.
Ecosistema: He did nada?
BO’M: Stacy Kirkland still has the ring you gave me, Mac.
MF: And you’re reminding me of this now, because…
BO’M: Everyone seems to be really terrible at continuity and remembering plot points.
Kayfabe comes out of the church dressed as a nun with a giant habit on. She gives Bridget the stink eye and as the wind picks up, Kay is whisked into air and floats away on the oversized wings of her headgear and we fade.
Post by Moosehead Jack on Jun 12, 2019 19:02:35 GMT -5
OOWF MidWeek Mayhem (#920) Live! From North Hero, Vermont June 12, 2019
FRENEMIES vs. THE DARLINGS – Best of Seven Series, Match 4
Little bit of controversy to end this one. After a grueling thirty minute match, Alex catches Bridget with a bridging German suplex. The referee counts three, but replay shows that Bridget rolled her shoulder just before the three count, while Alex’s were still on the mat. The referee confers with the announcer after watching the replay on the OOTron and awards the victory to the Frenemies. WINNERS in 33:29 – Frenemies – Frenemies lead 3-1
FIREWOMAN vs. EL VOLTAJE
Voltaje stalls to start, which only angers Fire even more. When she finally DOES get her hands on him, she absolutely decimates him. Ecosistema makes his way to the ring and slides Voltaje a chain, which he uses to bust Fire open and sway the match to his favor. Moose comes out and goes after Ecosistema, and they fight to the back. Inside the ring, El Voltaje lines up for another shot with the chain, but Fire moves out of the way, drops Voltaje with a superkick, then a FIRESTOMP then finishes him off with the BEST FIRESAULT EVER! WINNER in 9:21 – Firewoman
MOOSEHEAD JACK vs. ECOSISTEMA
La Ecosistema makes his goofy way to the ring, and the fans cheer, ever impressed by the comedy, even though he's got the Tag Team belt. He hands it off to the timekeeper for safety's sake. Moosehead Jack comes down and just does not wait for any kind of bell-ringing things, he just goes right after Ecosistema, and definitely takes out years of anger towards Ecosystem on the masked totally-not Ecosystem opponent. He knocks La Ecosistema loopy, and repeatedly bashes his head into the ringpost, making Barros intervene. Not for long, because Moose gets past Barros, but it's just enough time for Ecosistema to regroup and roll out of the ring. Moose follows him out and the chase is on! They circle the ring once, and on the second go around, Ecosistema climbs the corner and turns to nail Moose in the face with a well placed boot. Barros warns him but since no one was actually in the ring, there's not much else to do. Moose has staggered back enough, and Ecosistema back in the ring hits the far ropes to give him momentum. He leaps to the top of the ropes and SUICIDE PLANCHA onto Moose on the floor. The two men struggle to get to their feet and get there about the same time. Moose hits a Chimera Plex and then rolls into the ring. Moose stares down at Ecosistema, mocking him, as Barros counts. Moose dares him to get back into the ring. La Ecosistema is on his feet and staggers over to the time keepers table to catch his breath. Barros gets to 10 and calls for the bell.
Winner via countout in 13:15....MOOSEHEAD JACK~!
La Ecosistema turns to the ring, and grins...as he's got the Tag Team belt AGAIN~! Moose bails out to chase him, but La Ecosistema is over the barricade and through the crowd in a flash. Moose pursues him anyway, tossing chairs and fans out of his way.
KIERAN BOURNE vs. ZED vs. MAC FLASHER
Great action in this one, all three men get near falls and the crowd is behind everyone, well, except Bourne, they aren’t really sure what to think of him yet. The end comes when Zed tries to leapfrog a charging Bourne, but doesn’t get quite enough air and Bourne’s head slams right into Zed’s groin. Zed falls to the mat in agony, Bourne lands and turns around and gets superkicked out of the ring by Mac, Mac then falls on Zed and hooks him hard to score the pin and the win. WINNER in 18:31 – Mac Flasher
SEBASTIAN DAVIS vs. JACK BULLET vs. STACY KIRKLAND
This match never gets started. Davis and Bullet immediately start brawling when Davis attacks Bullet from behind. As they fight at the top of the ramp, Kirkland is announced and walks right by them and heads to the ring. As the fight at the top of the ramp continues, Kirkland steps between the ropes and demands the bell ring. It does, she stands there for ten seconds while they fight and the referee calls for the bell. This one is already over! WINNER via countout in :10 – Stacy Kirkland
Kirkland grabs her title and heads to the back, pausing for a moment to laugh at Davis and Bullet, who are still fighting.
Russ: What the hell just happened? Razz: Kirkland worked smarter, not harder! Russ: That is no way for a competitor to behave! Razz: Is it lonely on Planet Russ?
BEVERLY CAMBRIDGE vs. MATT FOLZ – OOWF World Heavyweight Title Match
"Cut the Cord" plays and a very focused Beverly Cambridge makes her way out to massive applause. She warms up in the corner as "Battle Without Honor or Humanity" plays and OOWF World Heavyweight Champion Matt Folz makes his way out. He hands his Championship to the referee as Mike Elevenbee starts the introductions.
ME: Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the Main Event of the Evening. One fall to a finish with no time limit and It is for the OOWF World Heavyweight Championship! Introducing first in the corner to my left, she is a former OOWF World Champion, from Staten Island New York, 5'8 and weighing 130 pounds BEVERLY CAMBRIDGE! And now in the corner to my right, he is the reigning and defending OOWF World Heavyweight Champion. From Green Bay Wisconsin, 6'5 and weighing 225 pounds MATT FOLZ!
Matt smiles and extends his hand as the bell rings, saying "Let's have some fun." Beverly nods with a smile of her own and accepts the handshake. The two cautiously circle around one another before locking up. Matt slips behind her and tries a German Suplex, but Beverly blocks and rolls him into a roll up that gets a quick 2.5 count. Both are back quickly to their feet but Beverly's quicker, taking Matt over with an arm drag and then a lighting fast running knee that gets another 2 count. Beverly goes to pick Matt up but the Champion rolls her into a small package for 2. As both get up, Matt buries a knee in Beverly's gut and follows with a snap suplex. Matt with a teardrop suplex and he grabs Beverly's legs and cradles for 2. Beverly reverses for 2 and Matt re reverses for a 2. Matt shoots Beverly off the ropes and takes her down with a drop toe hold and follows up with a hard back elbow to the face. Matt with a La Magistral Cradle for 2. Matt with a Rude Awakening and he heads up top looking for a frog splash, but Beverly moves out of the way. Matt crashes down hard and Beverly takes a minute to clear her head before going on the attack.
Beverly pulls Matt up to a seated position and nails several hard kicks to Matt's back and ribs before pulling him to his feet and hitting a Codebreaker for 2. Beverly with a shoulderbreaker and she puts Matt in a hammerlock and propels his shoulder into the turnbuckle. Beverly with two hard knees to Matt's shoulder. Beverly tries for the La Bella Lock but Matt reaches the ropes before she has it applied. Beverly gives a clean break and backs to the middle of the ring as Matt gets to his feet. Beverly is about to continue her onslaught but is distracted as Kieran Bourne comes to ringside and gets up on the apron to talk trash. Both Beverly and Matt rush over and nail Kieran with a forearm, causing him to fall off the apron and hit his head hard on the concrete. Beverly thanks Matt for the help, then immediately trips him down and applies the La Bella Lock! Matt struggles but just reaches out with every inch of his 6'5 frame to barely reach the bottom rope. Beverly breaks, Matt gets to his feet and the two start exchanging chops. The crowd boos as Sebastian Davis enters the ring. Sebastian sneaks up behind Matt and starts to swing with Brass Knuckles. Matt turns his head just in time and naturally ducks, causing Sebastian to nail Beverly instead. The bell rings as Matt tackles Sebastian and throws him through the ropes.
As Matt turns to check on Beverly, Sebastian gets to his feet grabs a chair and slides back into the ring. Sebastian clips Matt from behind using the chair. Sebastian slams the chair down repeatedly on Matt's knee before dragging him over to the corner and slamming his knee into the ringpost. Sebastian with a ringpost figure four. Beverly gets to her feet and looks to help Matt, but Keiran trips her from behind and drags her out of the ring. Keiran lays Beverly out with a Face Your Fear on the concrete. Keiran leaves with a smile on his face. The Saints come racing out looking to get their hands on Davis, but he slinks away through the crowd before they can reach him. Fire, Moose and Stacy help a badly limping Matt to the back as OOWF Medical personnel come out to tend to an unconscious Beverly.
Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action be sure to check out OOWF Mid-Summer Night’s Scream 11!, July 28 Live! From Salem, Oregon. And don’t forget to catch next week’s MidWeek Mayhem, June 19th, Live! from Mayville, New York.
For all your OOWF History needs, visit the OOWF Archives at www.oowfwrestling.com Want to chat about the OOWF? Join our facebook chat group
The Phillies are everything I hoped the Mets would be - a team that plays their fucking asses off for all 27 outs. They're never out of a game. Solly 10/20/09