[salmonjunkie]

Many of you know I'm a huge Spider-Man fan. I've been reading his comics since I don't know when, and he is my favorite superhero. I remember geekiung out for the first two Spider-Man movies and being very pleased with the result. So as a huge fan of the first two movies, I was originally going to watch Spider-Man 3 opening night. I never got a chance to, and my schedule at the time didn't allow me to watch the movie at all. With nearly everybody I know saying it wasn't very good and with you declaring it was the worst superhero movie ever, it kind of kept me from seeing the movies in the theater.

My roommate rented on DVD yesterday. We watched it.

Holy shit. Holy SHIT. That was really fucking bad. Let me say it agian. REALLY. FUCKING. BAD. The action sequences were good, and the CGI for Sandman and Venom were just amazing. However, some of the web-swinging stuff - especially the Peter/Harry fight in the beginning looked too green-screeny, which is just unacceptable in 2007. But aside from that, this movie was just ABSOLUTE SHIT. Spider-Man 2 is my second favorite superhero movie of all time, right behind Batman Begins. Spider-Man 3 is going to tie Superman IV with the worst superhero movie I've ever seen. (I've never seen Electra, Catwoman, or LXG). The shit between Peter and MJ was just eye-rolling. In fact, MJ was downright terrible. I cringed everytime she came into the scene, which is a shame since I wanted to fuck her madly in the first two movies. And Peter as a prick in the dark costume was at first entertaining, but then that whole scene in the Jazz Club was one of the stupidest scenes of all. When Peter hits MJ and the whole fucking club stops - the music, even the motherfucking bouncers, just stop to GASP and stare, and be OMG HE JUST HIT A GIRL LET'S STAY STILL AND SEE WHAT THAT ASSHOLE DOES NEXT! THAT DOESN'T FUCKING HAPPEN IN REAL LIFE (neither do alien symbiotes that attach to you and make you a douchebag, but still). Also, Topher Grace doing a "menacing" voice with a shitty effect makes Venom sound like a fucking 8 year old boy using the Snake Mountain microphone to be scary. Actually, that was scarier.

All in all, this movie sucked major donkey balls. Fuck Spider-Man 3.

[Lucky]

Man... I've never seen it. I'm scared. I read League of Extraordinary Gentleman, I loved LoEG. I know Optard loved LoEG. I saw LXG, I fucking despised it. I know Optard despises it. If Spidey 3 is worse than LXG I don't know if I ever want to see it.

I saw that my sister bought a copy recently so I'm tempted. But I'm so scared.

[williamssl]

The jazz club scene and the scene where Peter's walking down the street all cocky and shit were embarrassing to watch and must have been downright embarrassing to make.

We just watched the movie Saturday night for the first time.

[The Jewish Cunthead]

I hated Spidey 3 too but don't start comparing it to Superman IV just yet, not with Nuclear Man flying with visible wires and Reeve injecting politics into a fucking Superman movie.

That said, the Jazz Club scene was some of the worst shit ever. Way to slow down an already bad movie, Raimi.

[salmonjunkie]

And what was the point? More screen time for Gwen Stacy who had no reason to be in this movie except as a nod to fanboys? To add even MORE friction to MJ and Peter - they already broke up! To show how douchey Peter became? All of those points were already made before the scene.

Really was one of the dumbest scenes I've ever seen in a movie.


Lucky, I am also terrified of LXG. I loved the book, and part 2. Everything I heard.... oh man...

That's also why I never saw Rise of the Silver Surfer. I loved the Surfer as a kid. I love that Lawrence Fishburne voiced the Surfer. But everything I heard about it was just so bad. People who hated FF and watched this one hated it worse. I didn't even hate FF, even though it was a bad movie.

[Lucky]

I haven't watched Rise of the Surfer but I'm not scared. I don't think. I didn't hate FF either but I think those who did are at least largely douchey comic nerds or folks who couldn't deal with some big changes or that it was much more of a silly family film than the comic films have been. I think they rightfully thought Doom blew and were pissed that it was based on the Ultimate FF and not classic one (and many didn't even realize Ultimate had already made those changes). But ultimately I think a lot of the haters just couldn't stand that it was a goofy, kid/family thing when X-Men, Spidey, and whatever else have been much more serious and dark. But FF was really always that way.

So part of me isn't that concerned that the FF haters hated Surfer more. They probably wanted to. Then again I'm not anxious to watch it because FF was not good and odds are FF2 is worse.

But the Spidey movies were well received by the dorks and the haters. Hell, they were more or less loved. Even though people hated Dunst and were pissed at the Topher casting. THAT bad a turn? That's scary.

[OpTard]

dear thai,

let me make something clear. i don't think spider-man 3 is the worst superhero movie ever made. i think it's the worst movie ever made. for the many points you mentioned. i don't want to repeat anything so let me think of what else i didn't like about it.

harry was Evil-Snowboarder-Man instead of hobgoblin or a second green goblin. the problems with this go far beyond the stupidity of Evil-Snowboarder-Man. how abou tthe fact that harry IS NOT a scientist. he find's norman's goblin gear. fine. but he does not have the ability update or enhance it.

why wouldn't anybody keep their masks on? the venom face they came up with was pretty cool. too bad 90% of the time all we saw was eric foreman with jagged teeth. and harry too. he'll fly up to you (on his impossible to attain flying snowboard) and then it's just "zip-zoop-zip," him mask retracts into his costume. why did you wear it in the first place again? in the first movie everyone complained about willam defoe's face being covered the whole movie. THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S WILLAM DEFOE!! his facial expressions are great. willam defoe is cooler looking than the green goblin mask. topher grace is NOT cooler looking than venom.

why wasn't this movie about harry? his was the smallest of the 12 plotlines they threw into this movie, even though the natural progression of the series was for this movie to be all about harry.

sandman killed uncle ben.

i said i didn't want to repeat, but this deserves it... the fucking jazz scene. UGH.

superman IV is better than spider-man 3. and on FF2, if you thought the first FF was simply ok, you'll think the first 90% of FF2 to be just as simply ok. the ending blows. but if you're watching it for silver surfer then no worries. they nail the silver surfer.

[salmonjunkie]

It's because Galactus sucks ass, doesn't it?



Right before the Spider-Man parade, I yelled at the TV, "put your fucking mask on, idiot!"

Oh, and why did Harry's butler decide just NOW to tell Harry that Peter didn't kill Norman? Could've told him a few weeks before before his face got nearly blown up. How fucking CONVENIENT for him to tell Harry that news right when he did.

And oh yeah, I guess Harry's butler knows Spidey is Peter now, too.

FUCK that movie was SO FUCKING STUPID!