[Chris Eco]

Mai Muyo walks in to the PCPL Repository following Zed.

ABFD: Well, if it ain't Minnie Mouse Muyo! Is you even of age for drinkin'?

JS: There's a drinking age?

ABFD: Darn right there is! Look at the bourbon we got in the back, it's aged eight years! Perfect drinkin' age!

Mai: Let me at some of that bourbon. Could use a break after a Matt Folz workout.

Mai walks around the bar next to Arctic McBearington and looks at Zed.

Mai: You doing all right?

Zed: Been better. How's being a champ again?

Mai: It's such a total honor. Not happy with the count out loss this past week, but the Darlings are tough. And if we can show that we really earned these championships in a rematch with Beer Money, I'll be feeling good. Beer Money may be silly, but they're a veteran team, I would never underestimate them.

Mai pours herself a glass of something and downs it in one, as Arctic McBearington growls.

ABFD: Ah fiddlin' sticks! She done downed the wrong drink!

Zed: What did she take, gin?

ABFD: Boy, that's the Heel Hootch!

JS: Puts you in a bad mood pretty fast.

Mai grabs her stomach immediately and goes to a knee. Zed runs around to help her up.

Mai: I - <hic> - I don't need no help! The champ doesn't need any help from a jobber boy!

Zed: Excuse me?

Mai stands up straight.

Mai: Lemme tell you something about Beer Money. Buncha washed up hacks tryin' to promote their side gig, they ain't nothin' any more! New Guard, we was supposed to take out the trash like that, but we ain't do our job no more! I tell you what, the only way they gonna pin Mai Muyo is if my back finally gives out from carrying the match with them geriatric wanna-be Seinfelds! But I'ma go there, and I'ma do my job, and that is to draaaaag a five-star match out of both them pieces of shit!

Zed: Is this normal?

ABFD: Sure is. As a point of fact, there's usually a lot more cussin'. It'll wear off soon enough.

Mai: Now, if the Social Outcast-adjace-esque knockoffs here don't mind none, I gotta go dye my hair black and get me a big ol' face tattoo. Maybe a mean snake! Later nerds!

Mai stumbles off.

Zed: Justin, can you make sure she doesn't do the face tattoo thing?

JS:  . . . can I have five bucks?

Arctic McBearington growls angrily.

JS: I'm going!

FADE

[Road Warrior Shark]

~~~ Inside the Spin Hansen Memorial Training Center, Dre Gaines is working the heavy bag when SFJ #77 approaches him ~~~

SFJ #77: Dre.

~~~ Dre continues to pound the heavy bag without a reply. ~~~

SFJ #77: Dre?

~~~ Nothing ~~~

SFJ #77: Dre!

~~~ Dre hits it one last time, then turns, eyes intently focused on the camera ~~~

Dre: Listen ups. I gots a lot of frustrations to work out here. I keep seeing Saints. I keep seeing Waknins. I keep seeing them laughing and holding OUR Belts. 'Randa, you's a nice girl. I aint got no beef witcha. But yous about to be in the wrong Mothafukin place come Wensdee. Imma 'Pologize in advance to yas.

~~~ Dre turns back the the heavy bag and resumes beating the hell out of it until we fade ~~~

[Jack Quinn]

<Justin, Bill and Zed are sitting at bar at the Nowhere Bar, Grille and PCLP Repository, clearly they have had a few too many.>

Zed: <struggling to stand up and slurring his words> nowait, wait, wait.......I got one <clearing his throat> "What's the matter? Still living in the past, aren't ya? We're a long way from Memphis."

Justin: "Memphis has nothing to do with it."

Zed: "BULL. That dog won't hunt. I can't believe you're still draggin' that crap around with ya. It seems to me, you'd be a little more... philosophical about it. AND CUT IT THE HECK LOOSE. You know, that goshdarn cu-... that *girl* never told you she was married. DID SHE? And when a man sticks a gun in yer face, you got two choices; you can die or you can KILL THE MOTHERHUMPER!"

<Justin, Bill and Zed all burst out laughing at this, toast one another and take another drink>

ABFD: Ok son, lookitchere, I got me one!<clears throat dramatically> "Hold on nothin' son! I walk around this chere town and look these people folk in theys eyes. It's just like someone's done slappifyin' me in the face! These people is afraid to walk down that chere street, and I'm tryin' to make money offa that like some goldern vulture! If we's gonna have a future in this chere town, it's gotta have some law and order!"

Justin: CHUNG CHUNG!

Zed: Na, no, uhhhhh....no, not THAT Law and Order son!

ABFD: Ok Lookitchere Justin! This here is your turn son!

<the three drink and Justin stands up>

JS: " Ahem. Sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes, well, he eats you."

<with that Justin's eyes roll into the back of his head and he passes out flat on his back on the floor>

ABFD: Well hell son, that ol boy can't hold his likker nohow!

<Just then there is a knock on the door. Arctic answers it and it is the cake delivery service "The Distance Cake Service" with the birthday cake the boys ordered. Arctic tips the man and brings the cake to the bar. They light the candles and are about to sing when Ellie May comes out from the back>

EMFE: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?

ABFD: We's celebratin!

EMFE: IS THAT A CAKE?

Zed: Uhhhhh <looks closer> yes. Yes, this is a cake.

EMFE: <holding the bridge of her nose> Do you KNOW what happens when you bring a cake anywhere into the wrestling world?

ABFD: Uhhhhhhhh

EMFE: SOMEONE is going to get thrown into the cake! Look, we have a title match tomorrow night and ...........

<Ellie May's yelling fades into the background a bit and we see Bill and Zed trying to pay attention to the lecture while they slyly blow out the candles and begin cutting the cake. Bill, Zed and Arctic all take a piece of cake on the plate and slowly eat it, the whole time maintaining eye contact with Ellie May>

EMFE: .........and THAT is why it is so important to make sure the ducks are never allowed in the living room! Do you guys follow? Wait.......what are you doing?

Zed: <with a mouthful of cake> eafting cake

EMFE: How........how is that possible? this is pro wrestling

Arctic: Well.......technically this is Nowhere

EMFE: What?

Arctic: Nothing ever happens nowhere, everything has to happen somewhere, so if this is nowhere, then anything happening here can't really be happening because it's not happening somewhere

EMFE: <staring at Arctic trying to comprehend what he just said> WHAT?!?!

Zed: <swallowing a mouthful of cake> Wrestling logic don't always apply here

EMFE: That makes NO SENSE! Wrestling logic applies EVERYWHERE

ABFD: Well hell son, that don't apply to us cause we's.......

EMFE: <sighing> BANNED FROM EVERYWHERE

Zed & ABFD: HOT DAMN SON! SHE DONE GOTIFY IT!

EMFE: <shaking her head> Walked right into that one. Where's Justin?

<Zed and Bill look over their shoulder where Justin is snoring on the floor>

EMFE: YOU HAVE A MATCH TOMORROW

ABFD: But we's celebratin! A big holiday!

EMFE: There are no.......August has no holidays

Zed: Today is Sam Elliot's birthday! You didn't know that?

EMFE: <shaking her head> Of course! How could I forget? Arctic?

<Arctic pours Ellie May a double and we fade>

[Chris Eco]

Junichiro “Ecosystem” Muyo is sitting backstage with Renata Younger, in a relaxed interview environment. His Intercontinental Championship is prominently slung over his shoulder.

Renata: Ecosystem, you’ve been quite busy this week with your little nominations show –

Eco: Wasn’t that fun? I thought that was fun.

Renata: Well, whether or not it was fun –

Eco: Are you saying it wasn’t fun?

Renata: – some people are saying –

Eco: No. No no no. Stop right there. I don’t want to hear another word out of your fucking mouth until you answer my fucking question. Did you think that my segments with Tytan were funny? Humorous? Did you laugh? Yes. Or. No.

Renata: You’re scaring me.

Eco: No, I’m – you’re so sensitive, honestly. I don’t have patience for this. You didn’t think it was funny, the whole bit with the Goldwater speech, the little joke at the end, fine, you have no taste. Tytan doesn’t have any taste either. Nobody has any taste around here, and nobody listens to anyone else, so why don’t you just ask the fucking question you were going to ask in the first place?

Renata: I was . . . I was only going to say, some people are saying that your spending this week on your comedy act, it might imply you’re not taking Firewoman’s rematch seriously. Or maybe that you’re going to deny her a proper rematch again?

Ecosystem leans in.

Eco: Deny her a proper rematch? Deny – I didn’t deny her shit, Renata.

Renata: You sent Agrius out –

Eco: Excuse me, I'm talking. I didn't deny her anything. I gave her the biggest opportunity in the world. I put her up against a man that has won zero – count them, zero championships. Yeah, you count them at home, Agrius, before you tell me how everything I’ve ever led is a failure. Like when I turned Voltage into a Tag Team Champion. Like when I gave Stan Fulton his Grand Slam. Like when I gave your boy Tytan a World Championship on a silver platter through Trinity.

Renata: I take the point –

Eco: Yeah, well, he needs to take it, not you. The point is, Firewoman, I basically said that if you beat my Young Boy - you know what that means, go explain it to Aquarium - I said that if you beat my Young Boy, you could have my championship, and you blew it. 

Renata: You did interfere in that match –

Eco: Oh, boo fucking hoo. If it’s close enough to cheat, it’s your fault for letting it get that close in the first place.

Renata: Well, some would say that it’s especially frustrating watching the Intercontinental Champion cheat –

Eco: Who are “some,” Renata? Is this hashtag-Many-People-Are-Saying? Are you Donald Trump now? You’ve got a question, ask the question.

Renata: Okay.

Eco: Are you going to ask me a question?

Renata: Yes—

Eco: NOW!

Renata: Lo-look, the Intercontinental Championship, it’s associated with . . . with being the workhorse of the company, right? That’s what your sister says.

Eco: Yeah, she loves this fucking belt. Yeah, sure, you can think of the Intercontinental Championship and think of Ricky Fucking Steamboat like she does. Well, guess who I'm thinking about? I’m actually thinking about Honky Tonk Man. You know why I’m thinking about Honky Tonk Man? Because just like him, I’m going to hold this championship FOR FUCKING EVER.

Renata: Well, it’s an interesting comparison, because Honky Tonk Man was also not known for being the flashiest in the ring –

Eco: He was shit, Renata. He was an untalented piece of shit. And you’re about to say I’m shit too.

Renata: I wasn’t—

Eco: Yes you fucking were. And let me answer your stupid fucking question that you’re too cowardly to ask. Yes, I do think I deserve this championship. And I do think I am The Workhorse of this company. Would you like to know why I think that?

Renata: Sure.

Eco: Well, I could give you a speech about how I beat Firewoman clean after everyone said I could never beat her. I could give you a speech about how I pushed Chad Madison to the absolute limit until Tytan dragged himself in. I could give you a speech about how I had THE UNDISPUTED MATCH OF THE YEAR with Tommy Wilder.

But you know what? I don’t give a shit about any of that.

I am The Workhorse of the OOWF because in the OOWF, we live and die by the story. We live and die by ratings. We live and die by fans’ interest. What is the OOWF without me? It’s Attitude Era retread after retread mixed in with Days of our Lives. Everybody’s tough, everybody’s a badass, and they’ll snarl and yell and boast and lull you right to fucking sleep. Let’s be clear, every single interesting thing that has ever happened in this company has come from one man, and that one man is Junichiro Muyo.

Whether it was comedy like the Establishment or the Defenestrators, whether it was a whole-company war like DEVILS or my corporate takeover, whether it was making whiny boring-ass shoot-promo failures like Stan Fulton or Tytan actually relevant and actual champions, whether it was dark shit like Trinity or my own funeral, or whether it was the most evil man the OOWF has ever seen winning himself Face of the Year with a World Championship to boot, there has been NOTHING interesting in this company that has not come from Junichiro Muyo.

Try me for a counter-example. Just try me.

Renata: How about The Five?

Eco: The Five? Sure, let’s talk about The Five. Big group, great talents, beat me up plenty, why did The Five eventually choose to disband? Seriously, why?

Renata: I think they just felt they were so dominant that –

Eco: Because they were boring as shit, Renata. Because they were ratings death. Because they were Triple H’s Evolution run on steroids, and not the kind of steroids Triple H was on. One great idea, and they ran out of innovation immediately. That’s why the Saints of Sinners keeps limping on years later.

Heck, let’s not even rag on Moose, eleven year old goth kid’s wet dream that he is. Drink and Destroy has been limping along for what, almost a decade? They’re here to drink and try real hard, good for them! Here, forget all the non-Muyos, when has my sister ever reinvented herself? Here’s your one sentence: she wants to be a good role model and champion, but also be friends with Matt Folz, and sometimes those two things come into conflict. That’s been her story since the New Guard, Renata. Do you know how long ago that was? Do you know how long it has been since they finally retired Outback Jack, who – you know what, I won’t say a bad word about Outback Jack. It’s not his fault he was boring – look at his children, it’s clearly genetic.

Renata: You must understand how foolish you sound, how dismissive you’re being of people who built this company, when you've just up and left so many times –

Eco: No, Renata. I’m dismissive of people who maintained this company. People who made sure the shows got booked and the utility bills were paid on time. The only person who ever built anything in this company is me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me.

Renata: Okay!

Eco: Me. Me. Me. Me. Me.

Renata: Okay!

Eco: Okay, okay what? Are you listening? Do you understand? I am The Architect. I am The Builder. I am The Workhorse of this company, and tonight, I will go out and defend my Intercontinental Championship against one of the greatest wrestlers in this company’s history, and I will defeat her, embarrass her, and show the world why Firewoman – just like Tytan – is nothing more than a footnote in the story of this business.

Renata: And what are you?

Ecosystem smirks, stands and adjusts his championship.

Eco: I Am The End of the Story.

FADE

[wld]

Fade in to the Saints in their locker room

Stank: So...Wilder.

Moosehead Jack: Have fun.

S: Billy-Dee?

L.D. Williams: Look...don’t kill him if you can avoid it, but don’t feel like you have to let him win or anything.

MHJ: Fuck you.

S: I wasn’t looking for instructions. I ’m asking what you’re up to.

MHJ: Protecting the family tree, I would assume.

LDW: If I had a problem with Wilder marrying my daughter, I wouldn’t be this gentle about it.

S: Gentle? You call making him face the four of us ‘gentle’?

LDW: <raises an eyebrow> We’re using the ring, aren’t we?.

S: Fair enough.

LDW: It’s just an object lesson, nothing more. It’s not like his life depends on it

Now Stank raises an eyebrow.

LDW: Like I said, don’t kill him…unless you have to.

<fade>

[Jack Quinn]

<the Saints watch Eco's promo>

MHJ: And THAT is what they trust?

Sta: <shaking his head> I thought he was delusional before.......

MHJ: He was

LDW: But this.......wow. Has Eco even been IN a match that received ANY praise up until this year?

MHJ: <thinking> a few.......maybe?

Sta: And now HE is the man that makes the company go?

LDW: <sitting back and thinking but not saying anything>

Sta: Billy Dee?

LDW: Nothing Eco does is ever random. Every single thing he does is calculated for maximum impact on others, and maximum gain for himself

Sta: <thinking, then nodding in agreement> True. So, what is he up to?

LDW: I don't know. But this is not random

MHJ: <snorting> I think he's just finally fucking lost it. Fire is going to kick the shit out of him tonight and take her title back

Sta: I think we need to talk to Fire, we need to be at ringside

LDW: No way she will let you

MHJ: Well, if we do it right, she won't have a choice. 13, go to the ticket office, get us ringside seats tonight for Fire's match

<13 grins and leaves and we fade to black>

[The Canadian Content]

Skurge: Hey, SYB: I'm going to watch House Party. You in?

SYB: Hell yeah. I haven't seen that movie in years.

Skurge: It's a good'un. I used to listen to Kid and Play all the time when I was younger.

SYB: Much younger. Hey, I can never remember: is it Kid or Play who has the high-top fade?

[fasteddiek]

(Tytan sees Ecosystem 's latest promo. Then he watches The Saints response.)

Tytan: You know, I think this is the first time I think I have to totally agree with the Saints and Moose. Juni I really think you have lost it. Then you want to continue to try and back me in a corner. Don't you realize when you back a dog into a corner there's two things it can do. And we all know I am not one to back down from a challenge. Be careful what your delusional mind wants. Because you may not like what happens next.

(Fade)

[DrMcAwesome]

*A NINJA CAMERA finds MAC FLASHER in a dark locker room as he listens to music on his iPhone. MAC sees a red light and takes out his earbuds, looking in the general direction of the camera*

MF: “Lindsay, it ends for you tonight. This isn’t about what happened the last time between us. You know, when you jumped me from behind. Bloodied me. Dropped me with a low blow. And used the ropes. That’s in the past. I’ve learned from that. This is different. This is for your OOWF Onslaught championship. It’s a title that Zed should have never lost. It’s a title that is supposed to determine the best pure wrestler in OOWF. You’ve shown that you’re the best pure cheater in OOWF.
“Tonight, I get my first one-on-one title shot … Unless you count me pinning a Nintendo controller as a title shot. Nevertheless, I’ve been pretty quiet over the past couple of weeks. See, I’m big on the Internet rumors. Some guy named Metzler said that I was in line to challenge for your championship before our last supercard. I figured that the four-way match was it, but I have this shot tonight. I have this opportunity that most rookies in this company never see. I still may be greener than grass compared to others in here, and that’s fine. I’m here to prove people wrong. I’d love nothing more than to prove you wrong, tonight, and take home a championship that needs a ring of honor enveloping it. I know what you’ll do to beat a guy when the strap isn’t on the line. I’ve seen what you’ll do to keep that championship. It’s all on film. You’ll bully and cheat your way to every win you can. So far, it’s worked for you.
“Not every bully gets comeuppance. This isn’t a 1980s sitcom. But know this, your comeuppance is approaching. And the bridges you’ve burned will leave you stranded in a lonely place. See you in the ring, champ.”

*MAC puts his earbuds in as we FADE out*

[Road Warrior Shark]

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem (Show 757)
Fancy, St. Vincent & The Grenadines
August 10, 2016

Dre Gaines vs. Miranda Williams

“Started From the Bottom” brings out Dre Gaines, who is still happy to greet his fans as he makes his way to the ring, but has a different demeanor to him as he awaits his opponent. As Dre does flash his grill to the fans on the hard camera side, “Stompa” draws out Miranda Williams, to a wild chorus of cheers. Williams jogs to the ring, climbs through the ropes and salutes the fans on all four sides before retreating to her corner. The bell rings and Gaines charges Williams, who easily escapes his grasping attack. Gaines smiles and tries again only to get the same result.

Gaines, showing a touch of frustration in his expression, offers a test of strength to Miranda, who reluctantly accepts before rolling out of Dre’s grip. Dre offers Miranda a fistbump, which she accepts before trying to put him into a side headlock. Dre easily powers out, creating another standoff. The crowd applauds on cue, as Gaines draws Miranda into a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Gaines uses his size and power edge to drop Miranda to a knee before firing off an elbow and a palm strike to stun and ground her. An elbow drop attempt finds canvas, but Gaines uses surprising speed to spring up and wrestle Miranda to the mat. A try at a deadlift belly-to-back suplex is successful, allowing Gaines a chance to wear Williams down on the mat with his weight pressing on her shoulders and torso. A chinlock from Gaines slows things down momentarily before Miranda battles her way to her feet and out of Gaines’ grip. A grasp at Miranda gets air as she tries to increase the pace with quick strikes and a number of running attacks that keeps Dre guessing. A cross body splash gets one as Gaines simply tosses Miranda off. Miranda, undeterred, delivers a springboard clothesline and attempts another cross body, only to be caught by Gaines. Dre carries Miranda to a corner, places her down gently and brushes off her shoulder before driving his own into her torso. Dre whisks Miranda to the outside, setting up a suicide dive attempt, but thinking the better of it when Miranda scurried away before Gaines reached the ropes. A collective sigh of relief from the fans in the ringside seating area makes the broadcast. As Miranda climbs back into the ring, Dre holds the ropes open for her before getting a slap for his efforts. A “Now you’re even” chant picks up as the two fist bump again, only with Miranda gaining advantage with a dazzling array of kicks and kneelifts. Once Gaines is down, a try at the STF doesn’t get the desired effect as Gaines’ height proves problematic. Miranda solves the issue temporarily with a Texas Cloverleaf attempt, but Dre reaches the ropes with ease. As Dre slowly gets to his feet, he asks for a timeout, to pull a bottle of Crystal Pepsi from his basketball shorts. He smiles and offers Miranda some “Cristal” before disposing of the quickly emptied bottle in the corner.

Seemingly reenergized with the sugary boost, Dre grabs Miranda and ragdolls her around the ring for a bit. Finishing the dominant sequence with a Samoan Drop that gets 2 from Mel Creech. With Miranda trying to get her air, Dre signals for “Drop It G Style” as he picks Miranda up into a standing position. While in the press slam position, Miranda wriggles away from Dre by sliding down his back and escaping to the nearest corner. A Dre charge connects as Miranda crumples in the corner. Dre climbs to the middle turnbuckle and yells “BEATS BY DRE” before raining down 10 punches on Williams. An 11th punch is blocked as Miranda slips out and rolls away from danger. Dre drops down, stepping on the empty Crystal Pepsi bottle and falling on his back. That gives Miranda enough time to climb the turnbuckles and connect on a frogslpash, getting the three count from Creech, despite Dre getting his shoulder up just as Creech’s palm struck the mat.

Your Winner (Pinfall, 11:01) Miranda Williams!

Gaines pleads for a replay review, but receives no pacification from the official. Miranda whispers something into Gaines ear to change his distraught expression to one of moderate satisfaction.

---

Moosehead Jack vs. Agrius

Agrius heads to the ring wielding a couple of steel chairs. Moose brings along this season's model of Happy Deth Bat. He hits ringside and Moose swings HDB at Agrius. He ducks, then plasters Moose with the chair. Agrius lifts a knee into Moose's stomach and slaps a side headlock on him. As he turns to walk Moose to the ring, Moose lifts Agrius up and hits a Back Body drop on the ring side floor. Pushing the bigger man away, Moose gets to his feet in a hurry. Agrius follows suit and is up only seconds after Moose but it's enough time for Lord Moose to continue taking control. Moose swats Agrius with a hard slap to the face and instant spins back and wallops him with a Spinning Back Fist. Agrius stumbles sideways and almost loses his footing. He's wobbled, taken by surprise and then clobbered with a powerful clothesline by Jack.

His arms stretch out to his sides as far as they can reach as Moose tilts back and takes in his quick work of a long time rival. The fans give him a round of boos and he seems to enjoy them as well as his eyes open and scan the audience before looking back down at Agrius.

As Moose pulls Agrius up, Agrius punches him with a stiff shot to the midsection. A second punch followed by a third until Agrius is up on his feet and driving a hard pressed elbow to the masked face of Jack. Shoving hard at Moose, Agrius pushes him back against the ring apron. Moose's back arching as pain fills his lower half. Agrius rushes over to the cart he brought to the ring and grabs one of few remaining chairs left inside. He turns already swinging as if Moose would be right there but he isn't and Agrius swings into open space. The audience laughs at him as he straightens up and approaches Jack, now carrying a chair with him. Moose pulls up using the ropes and quickly slides into the ring. Again the fans laugh at Agrius and it's starting to annoy him as he cusses someone in the front row.

Russ: "Agrius is looking a little bothered isn't he? He wants this but I think wanting it has turned losing into a potential nightmare for him."

Razz: "He doesn't want to lose, who does? I think Agrius has hopes to be the Bigger fish in a smaller pond. Maybe that's just what he needs to feel satisfied. We've seen plenty others who have come and gone through these ropes that needed the same."

Rounding the ring, Agrius is looking for the best entry to get inside the ring with Jack. The ring littered with chairs, Agrius pops up quickly on the ring apron and whip throws the chair in his hand into the ring, bulls eying for Jack. In a hurry, Agrius runs along the apron and begins climbing the outside of the turnbuckle. Moose hops over a few chairs and plants a big left hook to Agrius's face to stop his ascent. Climbing up in front of Agrius, Jack is inside the ring and Agrius is barely hanging over the turnbuckles.

Moose positions Agrius and using all his power, dead lifts Agrius Agrius up and Superplexes Agrius Agrius down into the center of Mount Chairstack! The fans erupt with shock and cheer as the clanking of chairs exploding out from under them fly out of the ring in multiple ways. Some flinging and get caught up in the ropes but still so many stay within the walls of inside the ring.

Both of them lay 'wasted' on the canvas. Moose grunting, holds his chest like he got the wind knocked out of him. Agrius is sprawled out, lying on two or three chairs that didn't escape out from under them. Moose finally reaches over and looks to go for a pin fall but as the referee drops down among the chair covered canvas, Moose yanks his arm away and shakes a finger letting the crowd know he isn't done. They actually pop some for the Saint as he grabs chairs trying to pull himself up. He flings a few as he gets to his knees and looks back at Agrius who is still down.

On his feet, Jack begins kicking away chairs that are close enough to the edge of the four sided ring. Giving him enough room to work but leaving chairs to play with as well. He sets his attention back to Agrius who is moving a little now and trying to roll over. Moose leans down, pulling him up off the canvas. He slips on the short stack of chairs that were under him but Moose keeps him on his feet. Getting behind a groggy Agrius, Jack hits an easy Release German Suplex. Agrius crumbles feet over head as Moose pops back up, refilled with a rage everyone has grown to see in him.

Razz: "Did you know that Jack has Mastered the German Suplex? He knows 6 different versions of it and can execute them with tremendous power and dangerous intent."

Agrius is grabbing at his neck, there might be something wrong with it as the referee bends down to check on him. Jack isn't concerned as he gathers a few chairs, opening two of them and sitting them down facing each other as if he wants to sit face to face with Agrius. He takes another chair and lays it across the two opened chair seats like a bridge.

Shoving the referee away, Jack rips Agrius off the canvas. He drives an elbow down into Agrius's neck and stands him tall, grabbing him with both hands placed tightly around the throat. Moose lifts, turns and slams Agrius through the makeshift chair table with a Chokeslam Powerbomb. The two chairs setup slide back bent down at the seats but the chair Agrius went through bent around his back like a piece of armor as he crashes into the canvas hard. Fans gasp and follow it up with some light clapping.

It would be easy to win now but Jack again gives the fans in attendance the shaking finger and looks down at Agrius. A long, solid scream down at his opponent, Jack is raging up to do something terrible. Stomping down at Agrius, Moose pulls him up and Agrius is all but unconscious as his body is almost limp noodle. Laying him over the ropes, Agrius's arms dangling outside the ropes, facing away from Moose.

Jack removes the bent chairs and finds just one that somehow catches his eye among the few remaining. He lifts it off the canvas and brings it up to eye level, staring at it like it was a magic crystal ball showing him a future nobody else could see. Turning slowly towards where he left Agrius, Jack gently lays the chair down back on the canvas. He touches it's surface and glides his hand across it before rising up with an increase of flame in his eyes as he stares at the back of Agrius
Stepping into Agrius, it looks as though Moose is giving him a hug from behind. The live crowd giggles, laughter fills the air but it is quickly removed as Jack pulls Agrius off the ropes and lifts him with a German Suplex right onto the chair Moose laid out himself. Rolling up, Moose doesn't release Agrius but steps around and hits another German Suplex, once again bouncing the younger man off the steel chair. For a third time, Jack rolls out and pulls Agrius to his feet still wrapped around his back. Moose lifts one more and this time snaps back into a Bridge, Agrius tucked tightly on his neck as his feet hang down bent back in the Bridging German Suplex. The referee is fast to drop and make the pin count.

ONE
.
.
TWO
.
.
THREE!!!

Your Winner (Pinfall; 16:44) Moosehead Jack!

---

Rabbit Mask vs. LD Williams

DING!!! DING!!!

Once the opening bell sounds, both men begin circling around the ring in attempt to feel one another out. After a few seconds, they step towards the middle of the ring and come together in a collar and elbow tie up, Rabbit quickly turning the tie up into a snap armdrag on LD. LD pops right up to his feet and looks over at the smirking Rabbit who motions for LD to bring it. LD immediately charges at Rabbit, but the bunny catches LD with a stiff elbow to the face, followed by a spinning neckbreaker attempt, but LD pushes Rabbit away and catches him with a discus elbow!

Rabbit falls right to the canvas, LD not letting up on his attack as he bounces off the ropes and lands a jumping knee down to Rabbit’s face! LD pulls Rabbit up by his head and irish whips him right into the closest corner. LD backs up a few steps to pick up a full head of steam as he charges forward and connects with a running enziguri, knocking Rabbit out cold! LD pulls Rabbit away from the corner and spins him on his back to make the cover…

ONE
.
.
TW--KICKOUT!!!

Rabbit kicks out before the two count, LD immediately rising to his feet and waiting for Rabbit to get up. Once Rabbit gets up to a vertical base, LD lunges forward and attempts a reverse vertical suplex, but LD spins himself around, wraps his arms around Rabbit’s waist, and throws him over his head with a release northern lights suplex!

Russ: Big move by LD there! Definitely the momentum changer he was looking for.
Razz: Well… it had just started about two minutes go. I know it’s going to take more to win, but --

Rabbit rolls out underneath the bottom rope and onto the apron while LD pulls himself up to his feet and walks toward Rabbit. LD reaches over the top rope and grabs a hold of Rabbit’s head. LD pulls Rabbit up to his feet and tries to suplex him back inside the ring, but Rabbit presses his weight down to make it hard for LD to lift him up. LD lets go of the suplex and tries to blast Rabbit with a right hand, but Rabbit ducks underneath it, grabs a hold of LD’s shoulders, and pulls LD over the top rope and out of the ring!

LD takes a hard landing on the floor, but immediately pushes himself back up to his feet, only to get blasted by a penalty kick from Rabbit! LD stumbles back and clutches his chest, and once he turns around, Rabbit dives off the apron with a flying forearm smash straight to LD’s face! Rabbit immediately mounts him and starts clubbing away with rights and lefts, the referee inside the ring beginning his ten count.

"One! ... Two!"

Rabbit grabs a hold of LD’s head and pulls him up to his feet, only to send him back first into the protective guardrail on the outside. Rabbit doesn’t stop there, lunging forward and blasting the senior competitor with a stiff European uppercut!

"Three! ... Four!"

Rabbit pulls LD away from the guardrail and looks for a DDT, but LD pushes Rabbit forward, sending Rabbit spine first into the apron. If that wasn’t enough, LD wraps his arms around Rabbit’s waist and sends him over his head with a belly to belly suplex right into the steel guardrail!

"Five! ... Six!"

LD hears the referee’s count already up to six and slides into the ring, remaining on his back to catch his breath as the referee continues to count Rabbit out.

"Seven!"

Russ: Rabbit needs to get up and get his ass back in that ring! He’s about to get counted out!
Razz: I’m not even sure if he could stand upright right now. That belly to belly into the guardrail looked brutal and seemed to have taken a lot out of Rabbit.

Rabbit begins to stir, getting up to one knee but the referee’s count continues.

"Eight!"

Rabbit sees and hears the referee’s count was up to eight and gets up to both knees, clutching at his back as he crawls closer and closer to the ring.

"Nine!"

The count goes up to nine and a surge of adrenaline comes over Rabbit as he gets up to his feet and slides into the ring before the count of ten!

Russ: Damn. Close call for Rabbit there.
Razz: But the match continues!

LD goes right over to Rabbit and starts putting the boots to his back. After the boots, LD immediately drops an elbow right to the small of Rabbit’s back, continuing to work on the possibly injured body part. He continues his assault by pulling Rabbit up to his feet, kicking him in the midsection, and following it up with a monstrous powerbomb! The impact from the powerbomb makes the entire ring shake as LD falls down on top of Rabbit and makes the cover.

ONE
.
.
TWO
.
.
THR---KICKOUT!!!

Rabbit gets his shoulder up to break up the pin, LD looking over at the referee to double check the count. Once the referee shows him two fingers, LD gets back up to his feet and watches as Rabbit slowly starts to rise. LD charges forward and goes for german suplex, but Rabbit spins out of it and rolls LD up in a school boy!

ONE
.
.
TWO
.
.
THRE---NO!!!

LD just manages to push Rabbit away to break the fall! Both men scramble up to their feet and charge toward one another. LD goes for a big lariat, but Rabbit ducks underneath it and dropkicks LD in the back of the head! LD stumbles into the ropes, allowing Rabbit to get a running start and hit a jumping neckbreaker!

With LD down, Rabbit steps out on the apron and climbs up to the top rope. Once he catches his balance, Rabbit measures LD up and goes for a frog splash… but LD gets his knees up! LD holds Rabbit in position and rolls him over, packaging up his legs for the pin attempt.

ONE
.
.
TWO
.
.
THR---NO!!!

Rabbit just manages to break out of the pin attempt, LD in disbelief that Rabbit kicked out. LD gets up to his feet and stumbles around a bit, motioning that he was going to finish off the match. He steps out onto the apron and climbs up the top rope, but before he could catch his balance, Rabbit storms up to his feet, leaps up onto the top turnbuckle, and executes a super belly to belly suplex onto LD!

Russ: Wow! What a move by Rabbit!
Razz: Pure agility right there. But I think it might’ve taken just as much out of him as it did LD!

Both men are down, neither moving much until Rabbit starts to stir. The crowd tries to cheer LD back up to his feet, but it’s Rabbit who gets up first, stumbling around the ring before he closes in on LD. He pulls LD up to his feet and goes for the a corkscrew neckbreaker, but LD shoves Rabbit away and blasts him with a huge superman punch! Rabbit falls back against the ropes and rebounds back toward LD who looks for a roundhouse kick, but Rabbit ducks underneath it, blasts LD with a stiff European uppercut and spikes him on his head with a picture perfect brainbuster! Rabbit crawls toward LD and hooks the leg for the cover…

ONE
.
.
TWO
.
.
THR--KICKOUT!!!

LD somehow gets his shoulder off the canvas to stop the referee’s count! Rabbit can’t believe it, moving over toward the referee to yell in his face, telling him to count faster. Rabbit turns his head back and sees LD was still down, immediately exiting out onto the apron going for a DDT.

Rabbit begins stomping his feet off the apron as he watches LD slowly rise to his feet. After a few seconds, LD finally gets up, turns around…

… DDT!...

NO! LD sidesteps out of the way, Rabbit rolling through after his feet hit the floor. Rabbit turns around and charges toward LD, but LD kicks him in the midsection, lifts him over his shoulder and hits a big Samoan drop! The crowd cheers LD on as he starts to feel it, slapping himself in the face to wake up and finish off the match.

LD waits for Rabbit to get up and immediately takes him down with a clothesline. Rabbit gets right back up, but LD was right there to kick him in the back of the knee, following it up with a huge roundhouse kick! Rabbit hits the canvas like a sack of potatoes and LD falls to his knees, crawling over toward Rabbit to make the cover with one arm draped across his chest.

ONE
.
.
TWO
.
.
THR--NO!!!

Rabbit grabs a hold of LD’s arm, rolls himself back and onto his knee, and then rolls LD up in a magistral cradle!

ONE!
.
.
TWO
.
.
THRE---NO!!!

LD just manages to break out of the cradle, both men spent after the back and forth exchange. It takes a few seconds for either of them to start stirring, but LD and Rabbit both grab a hold of the ropes and start pulling themselves up to their feet. Both men turn to look at one another, LD striking first with a big right hand! Rabbit staggers back a bit, but comes back with a right hand of his own that sends LD back into the corner.

Rabbit takes a momentary breather and then charges toward the corner for a double knee attack on LD, but LD moves out of the way, causing Rabbit to hit his knees off the turnbuckles. LD sees his opening and moves toward Rabbit, picking him and fling him over his shoulder. LD looks for a tombstone or possible a running powerslam, but Rabbit slides down LD’s back, spins him around… WHAM!

Rabbit blasts LD with a stiff European uppercut, but he wasn’t done there! Rabbit wraps his arm around LD’s throat and neck area, leaps back and connects with a moonsault slam

Not satisfied yet, Rabbit staggers up to his feet and sees LD was in perfect position for what he had planned next. Rabbit moves over to the corner and locks his hands around the top rope, turning his back to make sure LD was still in the right position. Rabbit turns back around, spring onto the ropes, and lands a” catapult corkscrew splash right on LD! Rabbit clutches at his stomach momentarily after the impact, but Rabbit hooks the leg and watches as the referee gets in position to make the count…and the timekeeper rings the bell!

Official Decision (20:00) Time Limit Draw.

---

Tommy Wilder vs. Stank

Both Stank and Tommy stood toe to toe in the ring, with the fans not sure who to pull for. Both men with their arrogant personalities were liked and disliked by the fans for various reasons. Both men sized each other up, standing almost the same height. Stank smirked in the face of Wilder, then threw his arms out to either side. Wilder, in response, raised one arm into the air, while the fans booed. After Wilder lowered his arms, both men made their first moves, locking up.

Neither man had a distinct advantage as they squared off with a elbow-and-collar tie-up to begin the match. Even though Stank had a few pounds on Wilder, he was immediately put into a side headlock by the more free spirited of the pair. That didn’t last long, however, as Wilder was immediately pushed into the ropes, by the lower back, by Stank. As Wilder came rebounding back, he tried to shoulder-block Stank to the ground, but instead, just ran into him and bounced off. Stank smirked, holding his arms out to either side… Then all hell broke loose. Both men went from starting in a very generic wrestling match beginning to having an all-out brawl in the middle of the ring. Punches were exchanged from both sides, with Wilder eventually coming up on the losing end, getting knocked back into the turnbuckle. Stank wasted no time, gripping the middle rope and delivering hard shoulder blocks into Wilder’s abdomen. After four or five shots, Stank grabbed Wilder by the back of the head and threw him to the ground, standing over him in a mocking fashion. The fans jeered at the top of the of their lungs, but Stank soaked it all in.

During his posturing, however, Stank wasn’t paying attention to Wilder slowly recovering from the brutal exchange the two just shared. He slowly rose to his feet, behind Stank (who still stood mocking the fans), grabbed Stank by the hair, and dropped him from a hair pull backbreaker across the knees. He rolled over, going for a quick attempt at a pin, but was only able to muster a short two count. Wilder, somehow gaining some traction with the fans for not celebrating as much, began arguing with the referee about the count. But, as Stank did before him, Wilder stopped paying attention long enough to Stank to regain his composure and rise back to his feet. He grabbed Wilder by the shoulders, spun him around, delivered a boot to the stomach, then a swinging snap DDT. Quick to rise, Stank delivered another swinging snap DDT, this one leaving Wilder almost completely out on the canvas. Stank then lifted Wilder up onto his shoulders, in a fireman’s carry position, and dropped down to the mat. Wilder’s back twisted at an odd angle before he flopped to the mat. Stank dropped for a pin.

1…! 2…! No! Only a two count! The referee’s hand was almost on the mat for a three count, but not quite there. Stank slapped the mat in frustration, but got ready to deliver more punishment. He went to pick Wilder up for the scoop, but Wilder hooked his leg around Stank’s, not allowing him to pick himself up off the mat. Stank tried to lift him up again, but Wilder’s leg was locked in. As the Saint tried for the third time, Tommy twisted the leg back with a jerking motion, rolled through, and somehow ended up with Lucas in a single-leg Boston Crab. The referee dropped immediately to see if Lucas would tap, but he shook his head instantaneously. He struggled to get to the ropes closest to him, on the announcer’s side of the floor, while fighting through the pain. The referee asked if he would tap! No! Closer to the rope! The referee asked again… No! Closer to the rope! The referee asked a third time… Y-No! Lucas’s hand landed on the rope, causing the referee to break up the submission. He was eluctant to let up his hold, but the referee gave him until a five count to do so. Wilder released the single-leg once the referee hit five. Stank favored his right leg, then slowly stood to his feet. Wilder took the opportunity to charge Lucas, but Stank was ready for it. He grabbed the top rope, dropping it low, where Wilder would fly over the top. Tommy took a tumble, but caught himself on the apron without Stank seeing it. Lucas began walking back towards the center of the ring, limping on the leg which Wilder had been wrenching at, only to turn around and caught with a springboard diving DDT…

Wait! Stank wrapped his arms around Wilder mid-air, his head hooked underneath Wilder’s arm, then exploded through with a belly-to-belly release suplex. Wilder somehow flipped through the air, landing on his feet, delivering a lariat to Stank as he stood up, knocking him flat. He grabbed Stank by the hair, spun him around, and landed a tremendous DDT! He hooked the leg! 1…! 2…! 3…!

Your Winner (Pinfall; 12:57) Tommy Wilder!

---

Chad Madison vs. Tytan - Non Title Match

Tytan makes his way down the aisle to a chorus of boos. He looks at the crowd at ringside, and then takes a sign from a fan and rolls into the ring. He holds up the sign, which says “Chad has a hammer, but Tytan is a bulldozer”, and laughs at the reaction it receives. Tytan frisbees the sign back into the crowd as his opponent is announced.

OOWF World Heavyweight Champion Chad Madison steps through the curtain, locks eyes with Tytan, and charges the ring! He slides inside and both men start throwing punches. Tytan gets the advantage and backs Chad into the corner. He rips the Championship from Chad's waist and looks to hit him with it, but referee Davis Hightower takes it away. Tytan turns back to Chad and gets kicked in the stomach. Chad hits several forearms to the head and neck and sets Tytan up for a DDT into the turnbuckles, but Tytan blocks and lifts him up. Tytan sets Chad on the top rope and connects with an uppercut. He climbs up, but Chad stuns him with a headbutt. Chad wales away on the big man until he falls to the mat. Chad leaps, but Tytan grabs the bottom rope and pulls himself out to the apron. Chad lands rolling, and charges as soon as he’s back on his feet. Tytan sidesteps and grabs Chad through the ropes, but Chad pummels him with rabbit punches to the stomach until he’s forced to let go. Chad shoves himself back and immediately springs up and nails a dropkick, sending Tytan tumbling to the floor. Chad slings himself over the ropes and slams into Tytan as he starts to get up. They roll across the floor throwing punches. Chad drags Tytan to his feet beside the railing and opens up on him with chops. Tytan sags, and Chad hits an Irish whip toward the ringpost, but Tytan reverses, sending him into the steel.

Tytan stuffs Chad under the ropes and climbs back into the ring. He stands the Champion up in the corner and pummels him with forearms until Hightower steps in. Tytan moves back, and Chad crumples to the mat. Tytan charges for a kick, but Chad pulls himself out of the way at the last moment. Tytan gets hung up in the ropes, and Chad rolls to his knees and starts attacking the leg. Hightower finally steps in and forces Chad back, but when he bends over to free the big man Chad leaps over him with a dropkick, knocking Tytan over and hyper extending his knee. Tytan rolls on the mat holding his knee, and Ched steps out to the apron and hits a springboard legdrop to the knee. He rolls to his feet and stomps on the knee, and then rolls Tytan over into a Texas Cloverleaf. Tytan struggles, but refuses to tap. He starts to fade, but makes a final lunge and grabs the bottom rope for the break.

Chad backs off just long enough for Hightower to check on Tytan and then returns to the attack. He hammers him with punches to the face until Hightower counts, and then sits Tytan up, dropkicks him in the back, and then goes to the ropes and hits a shotgun dropkick to the face. He forgoes the cover and drags Tytan to his feet, shoving him into the corner. Chad mounts the turnbuckles for the count-along punches, but Tytan takes him out of the corner with an inverted atomic drop. Now it’s Tytan’s turn for stomping, and he takes full advantage - until Chad catches his foot and rolls, taking Tytan off his feet. Chad tries to turn the motion into an ankle lock, but Tytan kicks free and staggers to his feet. Tytan takes a moment to work some life into his knee, and then steamrolls Chad with a lariat. Tytan scoops Chad up and presses him over his head. Tytan tries to pitch Chad into the crowd, but Chad manages to grab the top rope as he goes over. Chad lands on the apron and immediately springs off the top rope to level Tytan with a forearm.

Chad drops to one knee and starts hammering Tytan with punches. He ignores Hightower’s count, and the ref is forced to step in and pull him off. Chad shoves the ref away and drags Tytan to his feet. He stuns the big man with a European uppercut and drives him into the corner with a dropkick. Tytan hits the turnbuckles and explodes out with a lariat, but is slow to get to his feet. He grabs Chad, but the Champion shoves him off and connects with another European uppercut. Tytan falls, but uses the momentum to send Chad into the corner. Chad hops onto the second turnbuckle and nails Tytan with a fistdrop. Chad goes back to punching, and Hightower is again forced to step in, but Chad shrugs him off. The ref tries again but gets shoved away. Hightower decides he’s had enough and calls for the bell. A flood of officials hit the ring and pull Chad off before the Awakening arrives.

Your Winner (Disqualification, 15:08) Tytan!

---

The Circle vs. The Darling Twins vs. Murphy's Law - Tag Team Title Contender's Match

Each team makes its respective entrances as we prepare for this triangle tag match to determine the next challenger for the championship. It's all business for each of the six competitors in the match, not much in the way of theatrics or fanfare for the crowd. It's clear all three of these teams want the opportunity to claim the belts next week.

Alexis, Dee, and Shannon start in the ring. Alexis and Dee start off with a bit of a tussle, but Alexis backs away suggesting to Angelo Barros that Dee pulled her hair. Alex leans over the ropes claiming he saw the same thing, but nobody else seems to know what they’re talking about. Undeterred, Dee grabs Alexis for a side headlock before whipping Alexis into the ropes, where Shannon catches her on the rebound with a leg lariat.

Shannon looks to go on the offensive with Alexis after watching the start, but Alexis stalls her with a jawbreaker before tagging in Alex. Shannon and Dee are there, working together to suplex Alex as soon as he steps in the ring. The alliance is short lived, however, as Shannon follows with a clothesline to Dee. Shannon then drags Alex into the Circle’s corner, tagging in Ghost. Shannon bashes Alex’s head into the top turnbuckle on her way out, staggering him while Stank goes to the top rope for a leaping dropkick.

As that unfolds, Dee tags in DK. Ghost turns and meets DK, but catches a right hand for his trouble. The two begin slugging away, until finally the battle swings in DK’s favor and their momentum carries to the ropes before Ghost goes tumbling over. DK turns around to gloat, right into an enzuigiri from Alex. Alex then slings DK into the neutral turnbuckle, before taking a running start and hitting a flying knee on DK into the same turnbuckle.

Alex turns and spots Ghost, who has just climbed back through the ropes. Ghost hits a running knee of his own, then runs the ropes before splashing onto Alex. Alex holds his ribs in agony, and Ghost makes his way to the corner for a top-rope move, but DK is back in the ring and cuts him off with a rear naked choke! And it’s locked in good, Ghost drops to his knees in the middle of the ring! That only allows DK to wrap his legs around Ghost’s midsection and pull back for even more leverage on the submission move!

At this point, Shannon has seen enough and darts into the ring with a dropkick to DK’s back, breaking the hold. Unbeknownst to The Circle and the Murphys, Alex has tagged in Alexis, who is poised on the top rope. Spotting her opportunity, Alexis leaps and catches both DK and Shannon with knees to the head as they stand up! Alexis runs the ropes, knocking Dee off the ring apron for good measure, then nails Ghost with a hurricanrana as he is staggering back to a vertical base. Alexis then turns to DK ... BITCH KILLER! One, two, three!

Your Winners (Pinfall; 13:31) The Darlings!

---

The Awakening (C) vs. Zed & Banned From Everywhere - Campeonas de Trios Match

Zed, Bill and Justin enter first, carrying local Saint Vincent Iguanas on their shoulders to the delight of the crowd. Zed seems somewhat uncomfortable as his iguana licks his face, but he gamely plays through as they hand the weird little lizards off to the children. They no sooner enter the ring than the Awakening’s music hits, with Edra and Chloe brandishing their whips as they flank Beverly, all three wearing their championships firmly around their waists. The women make their way down to the ring, Chloe starting off against Justin and this match is on.

Simple collar and elbow tie-up to start – Justin puts a hammerlock on Chloe and seems quite proud of himself. Chloe reverses out into her own, but Justin back into the hammerlock. Chloe snapmares Justin over, but Justin holds the arm and twists it back into a hammerlock. Chloe hits Justin with a back elbow to the jaw: once, twice, Justin releases the hammerlock and grabs the elbow – twisting that arm into a hammerlock. It’s not clear whether Justin knows that the move is supposed to transition into something else as Chloe drags Justin toward the ropes and grabs the ropes – Chloe executes a quick mule kick to Justin on release which the referee misses, but Chloe hits a backfist before the low blow is too obvious. Chloe into the cover: 1-2-no, Justin kicks out . . . and grabs the wrist . . . hammerlock!

Bill suggests that maybe Justin wants to switch off and Justin edges Chloe over to the unfriendly corner – but Chloe suddenly jawjacks Justin! Justin flops off – but toward his corner – as Chloe goes to her own as she shakes off the shoulder pain, tagging in Beverly. Bill charges Beverly with a Mason Dixon Line, Beverly ducks, neckbreaker from behind. Beverly grabs the arm, looking for the La Bella Lock – Bill reverses into a rollup, Beverly kicks out, big tackle by Bill to take Beverly back down. Bill begins to rain forearms, power coming back into play, and winds up the Bionic Elbow – but here comes technique, as Beverly grabs his head and puts him in a Gogoplata! Bill is having the wind taken out of him quite literally – but he pulls Beverly up by his strength and drops her with a Release Powerbomb! (Apparently, you CAN powerbomb Beverly Cambridge.) Bill is coughing and wheezing however, and tags Zed as Beverly tags Edra. Edra gets the best of an immediate exchange of strikes, but as she pulls Zed up for the gorilla press, he drops out the back with a BACKSTABBER! Both are down for the moment, since that was a far landing for Zed.

Suddenly, here comes Ecosystem running down to the ring! The referee immediately spins around to admonish Ecosystem and tell him to leave – meanwhile, Chloe tosses a (blue and white EcoWakening) slapjack in to Edra! Edra catches the slapjack as Justin and Bill try to run in – but now the referee spins around to stop Justin and Bill! Edra swings the slapjack at Zed, but Zed catches it and yanks it out of Edra’s hand as he boots her in the gut – but before Chloe and Beverly can decide to run in to stop him, he tosses it away.

Eco: What are you, an idiot?
Zed: We’re not doing it your way!

As the referee turns around, Zed begins to drive the knees into the gut of Edra. Zed bounds off the ropes, looking for the RISE UP – but Edra trips the referee in front of him! Zed stops just short, Edra gives Zed a HARD low blow, and rolls Zed up! BFE attempts to run in, but Ecosystem grabs on to both their ankles just outside of the referee’s vision: 1-2-3! Just barely three, as Zed kicks out just past despite Edra’s MASSIVE handful of tights (Zed almost pants himself kicking out)!

Your Winners (Pinfall; 8:22) and STILL Campeonas de Trios, The Awakening!

The Awakening rolls out of the ring and celebrates with Ecosystem . . . well, S&M do, with Beverly more subdued about the methods and Ecosystem’s involvement. Meanwhile, Zed sits up in the ring, pulling his pants up and grabbing the family jewels, as Bill and Justin lumber in. Zed refuses an offer from Justin to let the iguana lick it better, and looks down intently at the slapjack sitting in the ring as Bill pontificates about the healing properties of iguana licks

---

Lindsay McAllister (C) vs. Mac Flasher - Onslaught Title Match

As soon as the referee signaled the bell, Lindsay charged her opponent, Mac and immediately begin to hit him with right elbows to the jaw, driving him back into the rope. Lindsay made sure not to stop there, landing a knee into the gut of the rookie, doubling him over, and then spiking his head into the mat with a DDT. Jumping to her feet, she immediately started getting a chorus of cheers from the fans (especially the men in the crowd, who had taken to cat-calling her).

Her reign of terror was stopped short, however, when she came back to get Mac, but he dropped her to the mat with a hard right hand to the throat/chin area. As Lindsay tried to rise to her feet, she immediately met a dropkick from the bigger man, sending her flying back and onto the mat. Mac wasted no time, stomping his way across the mat towards the down Lindsay. As he reached down to grab her, Lindsay reached her legs up and around his neck, then twisted him down to the mat with her, applying a head scissors. Before she could apply the pressure, however, he was able to bridge his body up, then roll out of the submission. Lindsay rolled over and quickly rose to her feet, positioning both wrestlers in their original corners, reset for the rest of the match.

This time, however, it was Mac making his way to the smaller Lindsay. The champ was having none of it, however, as she cartwheeled beside of him, out of his way, then handsprung to her feet. Bouncing off the ropes behind her, Lindsay landed a huge spinning heel kick onto him as he rebounded off the ropes back towards her. She quickly went for the pin, but wasn’t even able to get one before Mac bench-pressed her up into the air off of him, dropping her belly-first onto the canvas. The challenger got to his feet and started stomping onto the chest of Lindsay. As the fans began to jeer, he made a rude gesture to the fans thought it best to boo him. Grabbing Lindsay by the hair, he scooped her up and brought her back down hard with a scoop powerslam. He hooked the leg. 1…! 2…! Only a two count before Lindsay was somehow able to get her shoulder up in time.

Mac grabbed Lindsay up once more, slinging her hard into the turnbuckle opposite of him. As she hit the turnbuckle, chest first, he charged in behind her and splashed her harder into the corner. As Lindsay stumbled backwards after the impact, Mac grabbed her by the neck and dropped her down for a hard neckbreaker. He spun around for another pin. 1…! 2…! No! Lindsay got her leg onto the bottom rope that connects to the far turnbuckle. Mac let the referee have it after that, not paying attention to Lindsay as she began to recover. Their argument last a good few seconds, while Lindsay waited for him to turn around. As he did, she spun up for another spinning heel kick, but Mac caught her leg this time. A grin broke across his face, but it was short lived as Lindsay brought her other leg up and around, knocking the youngster onto his ass with a stiff enziguri. She immediately pointed to the top turnbuckle, which caused the fans to erupt anew.

Lindsay ducked underneath the top rope, leapt onto the top turnbuckle, and flew off for her Swanton Bomb, but Mac was ready. He rolled out of the way just in time, causing Lindsay to smack into the mat. He rose to his feet, stomping on the ground right his foot, getting ready for a superkick. As Lindsay groggily got to her feet, Mac went to hit the kick, but this time, it’s Lindsay who caught the leg of her opponent. She dropped to the ground, still holding the leg, and swept the other leg out from underneath him. Mac fell to the mat with a thud, quickly followed by a series of elbow drops from Lindsay. Lindsay made sure that Mac wasn’t going to move, then signaled for the top rope once again. She leapt up to the top turnbuckle, twisted through the air for the Swanton Bomb, and landed it perfectly onto the chest of her competitor! She reached back, hooking the leg while laying across his chest. 1…! 2…! 3...!

Your Winner (Pinfall; 13:20) Lindsay McAllister!

---

Ecosystem (C) vs. Firewoman - Intercontinental Title Match

Before any entrances happen for this match, the Saints of Sinners make their way down the aisles of the audience to surprise cheers (except from the little kids). They brandish their tickets in Broad Gestures, before sitting down in the front row to get a seat for this match ahead, following Ecosystem’s late taunts.

The challenger, Firewoman, enters first, with all manner of theatrics and with cheers drowning out her music. The fans are hungry for Firewoman to reclaim her championship from the dastardly Junichiro Muyo, and Firewoman looks hungry too, slapping fans’ hands just a little harder before entering the ring and feeling out the ropes.

The annoying chords of “Happy” play as Ecosystem comes out atop the ramp, twirling his microphone to boos.

Eco: Well, it’s good to see you too St. Vincent! (Boos.) Folks, one of the things I love most about the OOWF is the close relationship we have with our fans. Don’t you love that, Firewoman? (Fire is gesturing for Eco to get into the ring as the crowd boos him.) I feel like we can share anything with our fans. And tonight, I feel the need to get something very personal off my chest. I have . . . huh, this is actually kind of hard to say . . .

Ecosystem walks around the stage as the crowd gets a little quieter.

Eco: For a long time, I’ve been dealing with a very serious health condition. And I try not to talk about it, because usually I can manage it. But some nights like tonight . . . some nights it gets too hard.

The crowd is quiet as Ecosystem takes a seat on the stage, Firewoman leaning in and glaring at him.

Eco: The condition . . . it’s actually an allergy.

Mumbling and confusion.

Eco: You see . . . I’m allergic to boring.

The crowd starts booing again.

Eco: I can’t help it! It’s a condition! But the fact is, if security doesn’t get those washed up boring sacks of shit out of the front row, I don’t think I can give Firewoman this championship match tonight! (LOUD boos) What do you say, Fire? Can you . . . can you accommodate a poor man’s disability?

Moose is livid, but Stank holds him back, looking for the say-so from Firewoman. (LD, for his part, is chuckling a little bit.) Firewoman rolls her eyes, and gestures for the Saints to move it back a little further. Moose snarls, but the Saints move back a few rows as Ecosystem walks down to the ring, smirking with the championship over his shoulder. He hands the belt to the referee and extends his hand to Firewoman . . . for a handshake? Firewoman steps forward, extends her arm – and SLAPS the taste out of Ecosystem’s mouth! She takes him to the mat, and this match is on!

Firewoman has control of Ecosystem on the mat with strikes for a few moments, before Ecosystem hooks the elbow into a hammerlock – reversal, Firewoman hammerlock – reversal, Eco snapmare, Chinlock of Boring Heeldom – Fire stands up, Eco goes around for a guillotine, Fire with the knee to the gut, snap suplex to Ecosystem, good for a one-count. The rather clean chain wrestling continues for a couple minutes, until Ecosystem rolls out of the ring following a German Suplex. Firewoman bounds off the opposite ropes, looking for a tope as Ecosystem rises – ONE KNEE CODEBREAKER on the outside! Firewoman goes splat on the mats as Eco rolls himself up and into the ring, screaming at the referee to count Firewoman out.

The referee gets to six before Firewoman is back in – Ecosystem leaps on Firewoman, now taking the striking advantage, finally backing her into the corner and stomping a mudhole. Ecosystem makes a big show of backing up and gesturing to Moose that he’s winding up the ol’ Heart Punch – but as he swings at Firewoman coming out of the corner, she catches him with one arm drag, and then another, with the third sending him out of the ring. Ecosystem slaps the announcers’ table in frustration – and turns around right into a successful Firewoman suicide dive this time! Firewoman rolls Ecosystem back into the ring, climbs the ropes quickly, BEST FIRESAULT EVER! She hit it perfectly! One-two-
-No! Ecosystem grabbed the bottom rope!

Firewoman is angry after the referee explains, and picks Ecosystem up for a BRAINBUSTAAAAAA – right on the head! One-two-no, Ecosystem kicks out this time! Firewoman gets frustrated and picks up Eco’s legs for the Walls – but Eco pulls his legs out and kicks Firewoman into the turnbuckles! Eco kips up as Firewoman stumbles out, Ecosystem ducks a Firewoman clothesline, bounds off the ropes – ENF! Ecosystem hits the ENF out of nowhere – but Firewoman rolls out of the ring.

Ecosystem, ever the fighting champion, demands again that the referee count Firewoman out. She makes it up back into the ring crawling at seven – but Eco bounds off the opposite ropes and baseball slides Firewoman against the barricade. Eco begins to drive elbows into Firewoman – but she shoves him off, back first into the steel post! Firewoman swings a spin kick at Ecosystem , but he spins away, and her knee goes right into the post. Firewoman goes down grabbing her knee as Eco crawls into the ring and demands that the referee count Firewoman out. The referee begins to do so . . . when the Awakening’s music plays?

Russ: Why would the Awakening be coming to help Ecosystem when he’s winning?
Razz: I don’t think anyone is coming to help!

Sure enough, Tytan makes his way down the ramp, his entrance distracting the referee who immediately stops counting and starts yelling at Tytan to exit. The Saints are laughing at Eco’s misfortune from the cheap seats as Eco shouts at the referee to ignore Tytan, before rolling out of the ring and facing Tytan himself. As Firewoman hobbles into the ring on the other side, the referee checks on her – and Tytan grabs Ecosystem by the head, and SMASHES his face into the steel steps! Tytan walks away whistling as the Saints cheer, and Eco rolls under the apron in pain.

Meanwhile, Firewoman and the referee look around for Ecosystem, confused – Tytan broadly gestures under the mat, and Firewoman gives chase under, and drags Ecosystem out. Ecosystem is busted open above his right eye – Firewoman gives him a straight elbow to the face, and he just crumples. Firewoman rolls the champion into the ring, lays him out, climbs up to the top rope, BEST FIRESAULT EVER –

No! Eco rolled out of the way! Firewoman stumbles up grabbing her gut, Ecosystem flips upward with a PELE KICK to Firewoman, and Firewoman goes down HARD! Ecosystem grabs his foot in pain for a moment, but quickly covers Firewoman: 1-2-3!

Your Winner (Pinfall; 11:22) and STILL Intercontinental Champion, Junichiro “Ecosystem” Muyo!

Ecosystem quickly rolls out of the ring and grabs his championship – and then leans against the guardrail and removes a thick lead pipe from his boot, which he clearly loaded under the ring. The Saints and Tytan begin to charge from different directions, but Ecosystem quickly makes his way out through the crowd, aided by security.

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MJM Incorporated (C) vs. Beer Money - World Tag Team Title Match

Beer Money attack the champs as they get in the ring and it's an all out slugfest to start things off. Mai pairs off with SYB as Matt goes after Skurge. The referee is trying to restore some order but he's not able to before Mai levels SYB with a huge clothesline and Matt drops Skurge on his head. Finally the referee is able to separate the two teams and it looks like Matt is going to start things off with Skurge (because SYB won the race to get to the apron first). Matt works over Skurge with a series of punches and forearms before whipping him into his corner. Matt tags his partner and the two get in some crisp double team offense before Matt heads the apron. Mai whips Skurge into the ropes and catches him with a leg lariat. Quick cover. One...Two...Skurge kicks out. Mai quickly pulls him back to his feet and whips him into a neutral corner. Skurge hits the corner so hard that he bounces out. Mai smiles for a half-second before charging in and dropping Skurge with a clothesline. She goes for the cover, but no one is there to count because SYB is distracting the referee. Mai turns to get the referee's attention, but Skurge nails a forearm to Mai's spine and rolls her up from behind and holds the tights. SYB quickly points out that his partner is making a cover and the ref turns. 1....2....No, Mai kicks out. Skurge sets up for a running powerslam, but Mai shifts off his shoulders and quickly rolls him up. 1...2...3 it's over that suddenly.

Your Winners (Pinfall, 3:32) and Still OOWF World Tag Team Champions, MJM Incorporated!

Beer Money is livid, but the decision stands. MJM celebrate, then suddenly, Royals plays, and Alexis and Alexander Darling are on the stage, staring down the champions. Folz beckons them to come down but Alex just smirks and mouths "Next Week"......

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We hope you enjoyed this episode of OOWF MidWeek Mayhem!!

Upcoming OOWF Shows:
MidWeek Mayhem August 17, 2016, from Massacre, Dominica
Hell on Earth Sunday, September 25, 2016, from Asheville, North Carolina


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