[Chris]

Recently the board I've spent years on has seemingly shut down with no answer. In addition I've lost to ability to participate in another board I had become accustomed to in the last year or so. This left a void that I have spent the day trying to film with various boards I have participated in sparingly over the years or only recently joined.

I find they are filled with stupid people who annoy me. "Impact is without a doubt the worst wrestling show in history." "I don't know what you were talking about, because Jin's story wasn't a flashback and was clearly a flash forward." "Worst wrestling show? Its the worst TV show in history." "All the officials are clearly out to get our team and don't even try and make it look fair and this is a God damn disgrace." "Let us all continue to watch Impact, criticize everything that happens, laugh and complain, question every aspect of it even when the answer is obvious, and then declare it unbearable only to watch again next week."

What must I do to join your board? Is there a fee involved? Must I have a code? I would appreciate any help in this regard.

[National Champion Chris Cole]

Were you from OO or another board? If OO then what was your user name?

[williamssl]

To join this board you must:

1) Denounce all things Spanish
2) Profess your love for all thngs creepy
3) Admit that the Yankees suck
4) Confine all posts to 50 words or less
5) Blow OpTard
6) Agree with Moose in all arguments with Lucky

[DevSop]

You also must willingly have sex with the "it" that is Don Mattingly's wife. If this task cannot be accomplished, you must wear Dodger blue until Mr. Mattingly puts on a World Series ring. Until then your only task should you want to be a member here is to do Firewoman's laundry and scout matches for her.

[Chris]

The Game Chris Cole - I'm not sure what an OO is. I'm really not very traveled on the web. I registered to 411mania many years ago. I spent many years posting on one board that sort of became a home to me, but I never really spread out. I was just so happy there I never saw the point.

Macho Man Texas - (cool avatar)
1) spicy food gives me gas
2) i like horror films
3) didn't the Yankees lose last year?
4) that seems reasonable
5) i'm not sure what that means. I'm not a fan of violent acts and I'm not a very political person if this is some sort of terrorist thing.
6) I am not sure what that means, but wasn't Northern Exposure funny? It had a moose.

DevSop - I never turn down some sex with a woman or washing her underwear. ;D :
j/k
One of my first sports memories is Kirk Gibson hitting a HR.


Thank you for all your help and I look forward to being a part of your board very soon.

[Jack Quinn]

Chris, one of the things we like to do around here is assign people random sports teams that they then have to become diehard fans of. It makes no difference if you have a previous favorite, you can still watch them, but for all intents and purposes on this board, you will be the fan of that team till the end of the earth. So your random draw is....................

The Boston Red Sox

You are now the worlds biggest Red Sox fan. You believe Fenway is THE cathedral for baseball, you can recite Johnny Pesky's year by year stats on demand, you detest all things New York, you believe Mike Greenwell was the most underrated player of his generation, No No Nanette is a pox on humanity that can never be eliminated, you are a card carrying member of Red Sox Nation, Dan Duquette is mostly a moron, Clemens is a mercenary devil, Ted Williams is indeed God, and his frozen head could still outhit most people in baseball, when you die, you want to be buried in your 2004 gold trimmed Curt Schilling World Series championship jersey, and no matter what, you can never, EVER cheer Johnny Damon again.

Get right on that. Thanks!

[Batman]

Okay, "Chris." I'm going to let you in on a little secret. The Macho Man and "DevSop" are just "razzing" you. All you have to do is find that little box near the top of the screen, right below the banner with lots of words and symbols, and just to the right of "chat" and to the left of "log-in" you'll see "register." The rest is pretty self-explanatory.

Don't register under your real name, that's my gimmick. Might I suggest "UN-Lucky" as a handle? Just to avoid any confusion.

You and "Benito Mussolini" are bound to get on famously.

[Benito Mussolini]

HEY!

[Chris]

That seems like an interesting tradition and I can see how it would lead to lots of fun by spreading interests around. Its like picking a fighter in a fight, even if you're not truly a fan. It gives you a reason to care and be excited.

I already believe that Fenway is a cathedral, No No Nanette is bad, Duquette is a moron, Ted Williams is a baseball god, and Clemens is a mercenary. And I don't care for Johnny Damon at all. So this doesn't seem like it will be that hard of a transition. And since Macho Man Texas already said I had to say the Yankees suck I guess it all goes together.

Question. How can I be a Red Sox fan though if DevSop said that I had to be a Dodgers fan? Is being a fan of two teams acceptable in this community, because I know in most places its frowned upon? And if so, is there a preference of the two or do I just choose? Will I be assigned any more teams? Perhaps as my teams are eliminated in the playoff race I will jump from team to team as they seem to be the popular choice? That also is frowned upon in most places I have been but perhaps it is encouraged by some here?

Thank you very much! Will I known when my membership is approved soon because I rather not have to pay the subscription fees to become a card carrying member of Red Sox Nation if I never actually have to become a fan.

[Chris]

Sergei - Thank you! I'll be sure to check that out! But I do want to make sure that you're not the one "razzing" me as I wouldn't want to break board rules and upset procedure ruining my chance to be a member or casting a shadow on myself.

Is it ok if I post twice in a row?

[williamssl]

williamssl said:

To join this board you must:

4) Confine all posts to 50 words or less

Chris said:

Macho Man Texas - (cool avatar)
4) that seems reasonable

Chris said:

That seems like an interesting tradition and I can see how it would lead to lots of fun by spreading interests around. Its like picking a fighter in a fight, even if you're not truly a fan. It gives you a reason to care and be excited.

I already believe that Fenway is a cathedral, No No Nanette is bad, Duquette is a moron, Ted Williams is a baseball god, and Clemens is a mercenary. And I don't care for Johnny Damon at all. So this doesn't seem like it will be that hard of a transition. And since Macho Man Texas already said I had to say the Yankees suck I guess it all goes together.

Question. How can I be a Red Sox fan though if DevSop said that I had to be a Dodgers fan? Is being a fan of two teams acceptable in this community, because I know in most places its frowned upon? And if so, is there a preference of the two or do I just choose? Will I be assigned any more teams? Perhaps as my teams are eliminated in the playoff race I will jump from team to team as they seem to be the popular choice? That also is frowned upon in most places I have been but perhaps it is encouraged by some here?

Thank you very much! Will I known when my membership is approved soon because I rather not have to pay the subscription fees to become a card carrying member of Red Sox Nation if I never actually have to become a fan.

Microsoft Word sez: 266 words.


: : : : :

[OpTard]

williamssl said:

5) Blow OpTard

i'm waiting.

[Batman]

Chris said:

Is being a fan of two teams acceptable in this community, because I know in most places its frowned upon?

LOL!

Chris said:

Is it ok if I post twice in a row?

Lol twice!

Good stuff, Chris. . . .

[National Champion Chris Cole]

If Moose has two teams then so can you.

[The Canadian Content]

What if he has six?

[Jack Quinn]

well Chris, one cardinal rule here at Puns is, "never listen to a damn thing Sop says." So you really don't have to worry about that.

As for the team issue: here is the clarification - it is ok to have more than one team as long as they are not in the same league and are not direct rivals. For example, being a Red Sox and Yankees fan, aside from being completely absurd and immediately shooting down your legitimacy as a sports fan, would not be allowed. Also, being a Cubs and White Sox fan, also not allowed. If choosing a team in the playoffs and claiming "you have always liked them" you will be called a bandwagoner/pink hat/Sop and be ridiculed for years.

Hope that clears up your questions, we look forward to you posting on the boards.

[OpTard]

i don't like people named chris. i vote no.

[Deadly]

Aww, let him in. It'll be fun.

[salmonjunkie]

Christopher Guest is joining us? I loved Best In Show!

[Tommy]

mooseheadjack said:

So your random draw is....................

The Boston Red Sox

You are now the worlds biggest Red Sox fan. You believe Fenway is THE cathedral for baseball, you can recite Johnny Pesky's year by year stats on demand, you detest all things New York, you believe Mike Greenwell was the most underrated player of his generation, No No Nanette is a pox on humanity that can never be eliminated, you are a card carrying member of Red Sox Nation, Dan Duquette is mostly a moron, Clemens is a mercenary devil, Ted Williams is indeed God, and his frozen head could still outhit most people in baseball, when you die, you want to be buried in your 2004 gold trimmed Curt Schilling World Series championship jersey, and no matter what, you can never, EVER cheer Johnny Damon again.

Get right on that. Thanks!

Spot's Taken, Jerl - Pick him another.

[Chris]

[quote author=mooseheadjack board=guest thread=1205517114 post=1205528241well Chris, one cardinal rule here at Puns is, "never listen to a damn thing Sop says." So you really don't have to worry about that.

As for the team issue: here is the clarification - it is ok to have more than one team as long as they are not in the same league and are not direct rivals. For example, being a Red Sox and Yankees fan, aside from being completely absurd and immediately shooting down your legitimacy as a sports fan, would not be allowed. Also, being a Cubs and White Sox fan, also not allowed. If choosing a team in the playoffs and claiming "you have always liked them" you will be called a bandwagoner/pink hat/Sop and be ridiculed for years.

Hope that clears up your questions, we look forward to you posting on the boards.[/quote]
I also look forward to it!

That is a lot to understand but I think I follow. So do I not have to be a Dodgers fan but I do have to be a Red Sox fan? In that case does anyone want to buy a Joe Torre jersey? I just bought it at a local store. It came with a 6 pack of green tea and a copy of "Moneyball" that Joe Morgan blacked 90% out of. I drank two of the teas but you can have the rest.

[Chris]

williamssl said:

williamssl said:

To join this board you must:

4) Confine all posts to 50 words or less

Chris said:

That seems like an interesting tradition and I can see how it would lead to lots of fun by spreading interests around. Its like picking a fighter in a fight, even if you're not truly a fan. It gives you a reason to care and be excited.

I already believe that Fenway is a cathedral, No No Nanette is bad, Duquette is a moron, Ted Williams is a baseball god, and Clemens is a mercenary. And I don't care for Johnny Damon at all. So this doesn't seem like it will be that hard of a transition. And since Macho Man Texas already said I had to say the Yankees suck I guess it all goes together.

Question. How can I be a Red Sox fan though if DevSop said that I had to be a Dodgers fan? Is being a fan of two teams acceptable in this community, because I know in most places its frowned upon? And if so, is there a preference of the two or do I just choose? Will I be assigned any more teams? Perhaps as my teams are eliminated in the playoff race I will jump from team to team as they seem to be the popular choice? That also is frowned upon in most places I have been but perhaps it is encouraged by some here?

Thank you very much! Will I known when my membership is approved soon because I rather not have to pay the subscription fees to become a card carrying member of Red Sox Nation if I never actually have to become a fan.

Microsoft Word sez: 266 words.

??? :-[
Im sorry. I am adjusting. I hope that I will be granted time to learn.
: : : : :

[Deadly]

Your new team is the Tampa Bay Rays. Why? Who knows?

[Chris]

tommyd420 said:

mooseheadjack said:

So your random draw is....................

The Boston Red Sox

You are now the worlds biggest Red Sox fan. You believe Fenway is THE cathedral for baseball, you can recite Johnny Pesky's year by year stats on demand, you detest all things New York, you believe Mike Greenwell was the most underrated player of his generation, No No Nanette is a pox on humanity that can never be eliminated, you are a card carrying member of Red Sox Nation, Dan Duquette is mostly a moron, Clemens is a mercenary devil, Ted Williams is indeed God, and his frozen head could still outhit most people in baseball, when you die, you want to be buried in your 2004 gold trimmed Curt Schilling World Series championship jersey, and no matter what, you can never, EVER cheer Johnny Damon again.

Get right on that. Thanks!

Spot's Taken, Jerl - Pick him another.

Oh no! I already signed up for Red Sox Nation and bought a patch of sod from Fenway! I hope my bid for Papelbon's lingerie does not go through!


I think I messed up the quotes. I'm sorry.

[Deadly]

Return it, you dirty Rays fan.