[Tommy]

7/16 lineup

From Somewhere...

World Title Match - LDW vs. Crete

Tag Title Match - IHOP vs. CTC (yeah, they TOTALLY deserve a title shot)

Onslaught Tournament
AA vs. Carl From Fresnoo
Tyson vs. Seamus
Amnesiac vs. Bunny
Dead vs. DHM

MHJ/Poe vs. AD/DM
P/L vs. WGFT
Stank/OBJ vs. ZKD/Tyt
Spin vs. Eric
Justin Sane vs. Blitz vs. Vander
Knife vs. Cole

[karmic]

Inside the DESTROYITARIUM~! D.H. Magnusson is TALKING~! on the crappy bar phone:

DHM: Yeah...Yeah...Look, I don't care, can you get it done or not? We're kinda on a schedule here, y'know? ... Perfect. Look, Mickey, I owe ya one, huh? We get back stateside, I'll make good on it. Yeah...hahahah...Y'got it. Look, gotta run, y'give Angie an' Tina a kiss for me, huh? Good...you got the number, right? good. Later, bro.

Stank: And that was?

DHM: Friend a mine back home. Mickey Nine-Toes. Good guy. He got the nickname when we was kids growin' up an' he -

Sta: Wait...do I want to hear this while I'm eating?

DHM: ...Naw, probably not. Point is, he got a job a coupla years ago...workin' for some wheel in the City. He's a sports agent now. Got hisself a wife an' a coupla real cute kids, too. Angie an' Tina. Sweet as all get-

Sta: Mags...You mentioned a point?

DHM: Well he's a sports agent. His firm, they deal with management. Hire 'em out from a pool, an' stuff.

Sta: Wait...We got enough headaches with Wally around here. You didn't...

DHM: Naw. I don't call nothin' for Drink and Destroy. This is just for me. I figured with the tourney comin' up next week, I could use somebody to help me keep my head in th' game. Someone t'give me insight and advice on things. An' then I was thinkin' about that crap -

behind the bar, the grating sounds of a fax machine blast out. DHM walks over to it, still talking.

DHM: - that th' greaseballs in Bennett's office pulled. a while back. With that sack a crap Moose pretended t'be a manager? Well I figured that th' best thing t'do would be t' fight fire with fire.

DHM pulls a sheaf of papers from the fax tray, looks at them briefly, and smiles.

DHM: Heheh...Fightin' fire with fire...I'm a funny guy sometimes. I gotta go see Moreland. Get him to sign off on this.

Sta: He's going to get us all killed, isn't he?

The bass player shrugs

[Fire-Babe]

The Run-DEA Suites are in shambles. Some of the members of Run-DEA are sort of sitting around or staring in silence. Alexander’s eyes are stone cold as he bores a hole in the floor a few feet in front of him. Samantha is whispering to him, and he’s kind of nodding. Phantos and Lucios come in and survey the damage.

Lucios: Wow….

AD: Yeah…she’s taking it well.

P: Nothing is burning at least.

Lucios: Yet…

Firewoman emerges from her locker room with her stuff, Lucky behind her.

Lucky: [whispers to Alexander] I’ll clean this up after she leaves, sir….

AD: Lisa, Davin’s talking to Rick right now, and I’m sure–

Firewoman gives him the look of death. Alexander wisely shuts up about it.

Phantos: So…heading for Florida?

Silence.

Lucios: Maybe head to Boston to see what Lexie is up to?

P: You could always do both. Plenty of time…

Firewoman glares at Phantos, and then goes back to gathering her things in the suite. Lucios slaps Phantos on the shoulder.

Lucios: Nice going.

Just about then the door opens, without anyone knocking, and Eric O’ Mac is there, flanked by four members of OOWF security. Alexander, Team Aquafina, and Lucky form a wall between Firewoman and Eric.

FW: Get out of my way. He’s a dead man.

EO’M: Now now now….don’t shoot the messenger.

FW: Messenger my ass. You had this planned, you little shit.

EO’M: I’ve come with my colleagues here to make sure you left the property in a safe and reasonable manner.

FW: Safe and reasonable. Two words that don’t immediately spring to mind as goals to strive for just about now.

EO’M: To be specific, to make sure nothing catches on fire…’accidentally’ of course….

A Mexican stand off occurs, as Firewoman weighs her options, and the rest of Run-DEA considers stepping aside.

Lucky: If you do it, you’ll never be back.

EO’M: Once again, we see Lucky is the brains of the outfit. Although, not as smart as he should be. Now, you’re not an OOWF employee, so we can’t suspend you. But we can ban you from all OOWF venues and offices.

Lucky starts to say something, but just then his phone rings. He steps away to answer it.

FW: When I get back—

EO’M: When you get back, I’m betting the OOWF will be a changed place. Hopefully there will still be a place for you here, but if not, I hear there’s a space in NOAH for a jobber for their newest star…

Lucky returns from his call, smiling. He whispers in Firewoman’s ear. She smiles. It’s not a nice smile though.

Lucky: Since I am apparently also free to go, I’ll get my stuff too.

FW: It’s fine, guys. You can move now.

EO’M: Must have been some phone call. Jericho?

FW: No. Alex, if you need to get a hold of Lucky or me, we’ll be in the Caribbean.

AD: Huh?

EO’M: [blinking]Soaking up the sun with your girlfriend?

FW: No. Looking into some feds down there.

EO’M: You know you have a no-compete clause.

FW: Yes, I know. That’s not why. Purely a non-wrestling trip. One of them really catches my eye….World Wrestling Council….name ring a bell?

EO’M: [Blinks again]Of course it does. It’s a huge promotion. Everyone in wrestling knows that one.

FW: Yeah…well. I guess I’m ready. C’mon, Lucky.

Firewoman and Lucky make their exit, flanked by OOWF Security. Eric turns to follow them, then turns back

EO’M: Gosh, it’s quieter in here all ready. This’ll be really nice for you guys.

AD: Go to hell, Eric.

P: You better leave before we change our minds.

Eric and the remaining security leave. The camera cuts to Firewoman and Lucky leaving the arena. Some die hard fans cheer as they exit. She pauses to sign some autographs and take some pictures, then they get into the waiting Run-DEA Limo sponsored by Dunkin Donuts and head to the airport. Just as she gets in, her cell phone rings.

[DevSop]

*Back at the Run-DEA Suites*

Alexander, still with an emotionless look in his eyes, walks over to where his sister Samantha is just getting off the phone.

Alexander: How long?

Samantha: I'm still waiting on one more call...are you sure?

Alexander: Just get it Sam. I'm tired of being the good little soldier boy.

Samantha: I just don't want to see you fall back.

Alexander: Don't worry about me. People wanna push and prod and poke...well, payback's a bitch. Just fucking get it.

Samantha: Don't you dare...

Alexander just stares at her...

Fine, 8 hours if you can pay cash.

Alexander reaches into his bag and pulls out a large money clip and without even thinking about it pulls off ten hundred dollar bills and hands them to his sister.

Alexander: The rest on delivery. And make sure I get enough to last the entire week. I need to show someone just exactly what I'm capable of. Meet me at that place in the morning, I got to secure some more stuff.

Alexander leans over and kisses his sister on the forehead and there's a slight flicker of emotion, but it's gone in an instant and his eyes are cold once again as he walks out of the suites.

*Fade*

[karmic]

Inside an UNDISCLOSED MEDICAL FACILITY~!

Davin Moreland: Well, it seems like it's in order...But how did you get this paperwork?

DH Magnusson : I know a guy back home, name a Mickey Nine Toes...Good kid. He got the nickname when we was growin' up an' he...

DM: ...I really don't feel like hearing a story. I'm hoping you got this cleared with everyone involved?

DHM: Yeah. I ain't stupid.

DM: But you might be crazy. And this is me telling you that.

Moreland scribbles his name on a few papers, and hands a couple back to Magnusson

DM: There. You're legit. Now do me a favor. Go see Darling. He wants to talk to you about something.

DHM: Talk?

DM: Or something like it.

DHM: You got it, boss.

[Outback Frito Pendejo]

*Outback Jack has a far-away look in his eyes, while Wally B King, wearing protective gloves, is holding a brightly-colored snake*

OBJ: Hand it over, Wally.

WBK: But this one is really poisonous!

OBJ: No worries, mate. Steve taught me how to tail a snake.

*Wally hands over the snake, which promptly buries its fangs in OBJ's hand. OBJ laughs, and the snake falls to the floor and slithers about randomly*

OBJ: Titan, the fun is just starting. DeBeers, welcome to my world.

*OBJ picks up the snake, rips off the head, and takes a bite out of the body. He then drinks... green tea?*

OBJ: Back of Beyond Jack here, mates! For fans of OOWF continuity, I'm the one who used to eat bugs! Well, to be precise, I still like to eat bugs. *Pulls a bug out of his vest and eats it*

OBJ (shakes his head, drinks a beer, and belches): Sorry, mates, I didn't expect that to happen! *Picks up the remaining body of the snake, and takes another bite* Mmm...tastes like chicken!

[Deleted]

In the hall of Random Encounters the camera fades in to see a beaten, bloodied Eric O’Mac laying in a heap…

Russ: “Good Gawd look at the carnage, what happened?”

Razz: “He may need medical attention”

Russ: “Who could have done this?”

Razz: “We know it wasn’t Firewoman she’s been escorted out of the building!”

Russ: “Wait, what is that…do you hear something?”

Razz: “It sounds like whistling?”

Russ: “What is that song?”

The camera moves to look around the corner, nothing or no one is there…Camera then zooms in - on the ground and we see a still smoking cigar

[fasteddie]

(The camera comes up on The Ultimo Inc. locker room. It is in the process of being destroyed. In the center of the room stands Tytan. He is obviously pissed off for the loss.)

Tytan:Outback Jack you son of a bitch. You pulled a win out of your ass. But you did something you shouldn't have done you had Wally lay a hand on Diana. So now he must bleed almost as bad as you.

(Just then the door opens and ZK DeBeers enters with his security team.)

DeBeers: What the hell is going on here?

Tytan: Just releasing some anger. Get out of here why you got the chance.

DeBeers: Why would I do that? You and I have some common enemies, and I am your partner for next week. So maybe it's time to hold off from destroying such a nice locker room and get your team together; then we will all sit down and come up with a plan on how we are going to go about finishing off these two Sons of Bitches.

Tytan: (Stops and thinks about it.) You know DeBeers you got yourself a deal. It will be nice to have someone else to help kick the crap out of these to guys. Especially since they left me out of the Onslaught Title Tournament.

(They shake hands)

DeBeers: Couldn't agree more, besides I see a lot of potential here. I think it's time to get some drinks.

Tytan: Not that much of a drinker but this time I couldn't agree more.

(They walk out, fade to black)

[National Champion Chris Cole]

"The Main Event" Chris Cole looks at the line up card for the upcoming Mayhem

CC: The Knife, again? This is probably Davin's doing, that prick. I'll get what I want.

[Demko]

(The Amnesiac stands backstage. He looks like he's waiting for someone to show up. From around the corner pops SFJ#829, microphone in hand.)

SFJ#829: The Amnesiac... what are you doing here?

Amn: I'm waiting for my Revolution XXX teammates.

SFJ#829: Tell us about your upcoming spot in the tournament to crown a new Onslaught champion.

Amn: What is there to tell? I will destroy a man in a bunny suit, I'll go on to the finals, and I'll win the whole damn thing.

SFJ#829: Yes, but you may wind up facing your partner, Tyson Kincaid, in the process.

Amn: Tyson's the kind of guy who would understand if I had to put him in the ground to win a title. He'd do the same thing to me, if given the chance. Unfortunately for him... I just happen to want this a little bit more.

(At this moment, Tyson Kincaid comes running up.)

TK: The Amnesiac! Eric was just attacked. Let's go... we need to find the sonuvabitch that did this.

(The two men run off, leaving SFJ#829 with the ninja cameraman.)

SFJ#829: Normally I'd run and follow them... but I'm just not feeling up to it today. I feel bloated. Back to you, Chuck.

[Concrete TG]

(CTG walks into the Undisclosed medical facility to check in on Moreland)

DM: Crete..?

CTG: Citizen Moreland

DM: the hell you doing here? I'm surprised you're not rallying troops or training.

CTG: There's plenty of time for that, still. I came here to make sure you're all right, as Rick's right hand man.

DM: I'll live- that's more than I can say for some of Team Bennett.

CTG: such extreme measures, I would hope, will not be necessary. Even if this is war, we should avoid... casualties.

DM: You've seen the lineup.

CTG: I have, thus my short visit. I have a great deal of preperations to make. LDW will certainly turn to Moosehead Jack for advice on how to face me and keep me away from the title.

DM: Then I don't have to remind you what that victory could mean.

CTG: with the OOWF title aligned with Team Rick, perhaps we can apply their Golden Rule against them.

DM: ?

CTG: He who has the gold, makes the rules.

DM: never that simple, Crete. Pick plenty of people to have your back.

CTG: If we're truly a team.... I shouldn't have to "pick".

[Spinch]

(Eric O'Mac is on the phone...)

EoM: So then Tyson says "BECAUSE THURSDAY'S YOUR NIGHT IN THE BARREL!" (He laughs, and laughter is heard on the other end of the phone.) Anyway, I've been talking with Bennett about whoever decided to attack me and I've been assured that they will be taken care of.

(Person on the phone says something)

Tell me something I didn't know. Oh, and get this... they've got me taking on that idiot Hansen tonight. I know, it's gonna be a cakewalk. Anyway, I've gotta run. Talk to you later.

(He starts walking, only to be LEVELLED WITH A CROWBAR SHOT TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD, COURTESY OF THAT IDIOT, HANSEN! Spin is sporting stitches above one eye and various obvious bruises.)

SH: Cakewalk, huh? I beat your ass time and time again when you were trying to take the Onslaught Championship from me, you prick. Don't think that I'm not going to do the same to you again.

EoM: Oh real-

(Spin gives Eric a BOOT TO THE FACE! Eric goes back down!)

SH: DID I SAY THAT YOU COULD TALK? SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND LISTEN TO ME, COCKJOCKEY. I'M SICK OF YOU WALKING AROUND HERE LIKE YOU OWN THE PLACE, AND I AM GOING TO REMIND YOU THAT YOU ARE NOTHING MORE THAN A SMALL MAN WITH DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR.

Team Rick is down one person. One person that is a helluava fighter and better than you'll ever be. And guess what? (He kicks Eric again.) You guys are gonna be down one more person, too.

(Spin grabs Eric and hits a TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER TO THE CEMENT! He kicks him again for good measure, and walks away.)

Shadowed Figure (looking at Eric): Ha. Nice work, Spin. But you're not done.

(He follows Spin away.)

[blownspot]

Stank - You've got snake on your face.

OBJ - Where?

Stank - A little to the left.

OBJ - Did I get it?

Stank - No... a little higher.

OBJ - Here?

Stank -No... Let me get it.

<Stank reaches over and the snake bites down on his hand.>

Stank - OW! FUCK! That THING is STILL ALIVE!?!?

OBJ - Sorry mate.

Stank - HOW the fuck do you not FEEL that on your...

<Stank falls unconscious.>

OBJ - Stank?... You ok?

[Jobber Blitz]

*Blitz is Walking~! Down the Hallway of (not so) Random Encounters, when he Encounters~! The Dead.*

B: Ah, Mister Dead.

TD: Blitz. I see we hang out now.

B: Yes, we do. Quite splendid, I’d say.

TD: Whatever. I need to go to Ric’s Sandwich Shop. I’m planning on a few more random encounters today.

*The Dead heads on down the hallway, but Blitz keeps following him. They head into the sandwich shop and take a table.*

TD: You’re still here.

B: Yes, it can only do wonders for my overness to be seen appearing with a midcarder like you. You are the pinnacle of success.

TD: Huh?

B: You see, I’ve just been beating Jobbers to the Stars recently. Or maybe they were just regular jobbers, I’m not quite sure. This week, live from Somewhere, MI *cheap pop* I’ll be at it again, while you’re in a tournament for the Onslaught title.

TD: And your point is?

B: Absolutely nothing. I just thought I’d get into trouble if I don’t promo, and I had nothing better to come up with.

[Deadly]

Dead: Well, whatever. Anyway, I've gotta get prepared to become a 2-time, 2-time Onslaught champion.

[The Dead grabs the rest of his sandwich and heads toward the door.]

Ric: WOOOOOO!

Dead: Shut the fuck up, Ric!

[Blitz follows Dead toward the door.]

Dead: Look, if you're gonna be tagging along, you should at least be of some use.

Blitz: Meaning what, exactly?

Dead: Not now, there are eyes everywhere. I've got a plan, but it'll have to wait.

Blitz: Who's watching? It's just you, me, and Ric.

Ric: WOOOOOO!

Blitz: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

[Instead of answering Blitz, Dead just points directly at the camera.]

Blitz: Oh.

Dead: Let's go.

[Blitz follows The Dead out of Ric's Sandwich Shop.]

[DevSop]

*Inside the Run DEA Suites*

Alexander: Is that it?

Samantha walks over to her brother and hands him what looks like a small doctor's bag. She shakes her head as she hands it over...

Samantha: Are you sure about this? There is no coming back from what you're about to do.

Alexander: Don't you think I fucking know that? But I'm tired of...I'm just tired of it. It's time.

Samantha: You know you'd never do this if Alexis was still...

Alexander: WELL SHE'S NOT FUCKING HERE...IS SHE?

...

Fuck, Sam...I'm sorry. But I have to do this. Here's the rest of what we agreed upon.

Alexander hands over a thick envelope that Sam casually opens and we see it has a lot more then the thousand dollars given yesterday. Sam just nods knowing she doesn't have to count it. She gives her brother one last look as he starts walking to door.

Samantha: Be careful little brother.

Alexander just looks down and then he looks back up with that cold, dead stare again.

Alexander: I'm always careful. If you need anything, ask Davin or DH or Seamus or Stank...they all seem to have a true grasp of what needs to be done. Look out for LG, keep her away from the arena if possible. Love ya Sam.

Alexander walks out the door and it slowly closes behind him leaving Sam all alone in the suite.

Samantha: And upon a pale horse he shall ride...

*Fade*

[jetskid48]

Jul 10, 2008 11:01:13 GMT -5 Spinch said:

(Spin grabs Eric and hits a TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER TO THE CEMENT! He kicks him again for good measure, and walks away.)

[Moments Later, someone walks down the hall to see a beaten Eric on the ground...]

ZK: HA!

[Walks away]

[Eric O'Mac]

*As ZK DeBeers walks away, Eric snaps out of his funk, walks up, taps DeBeers on the shoulder. As DeBeers turns around, he is hitten by a monsterous ROCK BOTTOM! Eric grabs his ribs.*

Eric: Around here, we don't steal catchphrases. Get in line, know your damn role, and next time, watch out. This may not be fair, this may be against the norm, but seriously, ask me if I give a shit.

*Eric stumbles to his locker room.*

[DevSop]

*In a completely different hallway*

Moosehead Jack has just walked out of the locker room of The World's Gayest Fag Team (it's really close to being changed) and he's whistling a jaunty tune not realizing that Alexander Darling has stepped up behind him with a sledgehammer in his right hand and the doctor bag from Samantha in his left. Alexander takes a full swing with the sledgehammer and cracks Moosehead Jack right in the knee and he crumples to the floor. Moose groans in agony as Alexander steps up to him and slams the sledgehammer into the knee again. Moose tries to stand, but his knee buckles and he falls back to floor.

Moosehead Jack: You’re such a petulant little bitch, you know that. Poor little Alex lost his belt so he has to attack behind someone’s back.

Alex continues to stare at Moose but he still doesn’t say a word as he turns his back on Moose and slowly unzips the bag.

Nothing to say Alex…that isn’t like you at all. Always running your mouth and it finally caught up with you and now you can’t handle it when someone fights back.

From Moose’s vantage point we see a clear liquid shoot into the air as Alexander turns around and has a syringe in his hand. The cold, dead stare that’s been apparent on Alexander’s eyes the last few days is still there but it’s now marred by a sadistic looking grin.

What the fuck is that Darling? Stop with the fucking games.

Alexander: GAMES??? You think this is a fucking game Moose? Not even close. What you’ve done to me has been the game. This, this is the goddamn bonus round. And you’re the lucky winner.

Alexander starts walking towards Moose and Moose finally comes to the realization that Alexander Darling may have finally snapped. He’s sliding along the wall trying to avoid the oncoming Alexander, but with the busted knee he can’t move quick enough and Alexander takes the butt of the sledgehammer and slams it into the side of Moose’s skull.

Not so fast now, are ya Moose? And where are all your buddies? No one coming to save you right now, is there? So sad, now hold still.

Alexander drops the sledgehammer right onto Moose’s knee as he slides down onto the ground to get face to face with Moose.

This is just the beginning of a long week, bitch. You want to think you’ve got a dark side and you’re the most sadistic son of a bitch here…I was taught by the fucking master Moose, and you’re a pale comparison. You’ll wish your boy Bennett never sent me a contract when he heard of me in Japan.

Alexander slowly rolls Moose’s sleeve up to expose his elbow veins. Alex takes out the medical supplies he needs and taps Moose’s arm a few times in order to get the vein to pop out.

Moose: You better fucking kill me you psychotic…

Alexander: Shut the fuck up Moose. I said the same thing to you recently…let’s see whose threat holds more water.

Alex squirts the syringe one more time before slowly plunging into Moose’s vein and slowly expunging the liquid into Moose.

Don’t worry, it won’t kill you. Sam gets good stuff. But now I have to get you out of here and not get caught.

Moose: Darling, I’m going to gegwybv jhyrg.

Alexander: Good, at least you’ll shut up now.

Alexander turns back and slowly takes a HUGE empty duffle bag, in fact it almost looks like a body bag, but it’s not. He places Moose inside it, making sure to leave the zipper open a bit to make sure Moose doesn’t suffocate before the real fun begins. Alexander finishes getting Moose into the bag and he starts tidying up the area to remove all evidence and just as he finishes up, an irate Eric O’Mac, Tyson Kincaid, and THE Amnesiac all turn the corner. Tyson and THE Amnesiac look like they want to charge Alex, but Eric holds them back for a second.

Eric: Fancy seeing you here Alex. How are things? How’s your sister?

Alexander just turns and looks up at Eric and remains completely silent with the cold stare plastered across his face.

What? No quips for your former best friend? Maybe, I should go see what Fire…

A brief flick of emotion passes over Alexander’s face before it’s gone again.

Touch a nerve, did I?

Alexander: What happened to you man?

Eric: What the fuck are you talking about?

Alexander: It wasn’t even a month ago when you were taking Stank and Crete to the limit and now you’re fucking hanging out with a flaming homo and a wannabe supervillian. It’s fucking pathetic man.

Tyson: I’M NOT A FUCKING HOMO.

Alexander: Don’t steal gimmicks of people you don’t even deserve to be in the same conversation with.

THE Amnesiac: Why don’t you shut the fuck up? If you haven’t noticed, it’s 3 against 1.

Alexander: Wow, you can count. It’d work out better for you if you had eyes in the back of that mask though.

Tyson: We’re not that stupid. There’s no one behind us.

Eric just hangs his head because he KNOWS that there is. Slowly he turns around and standing there is Davin Moreland, DH Magnusson, and Seamus McNasty.

Eric: Fucking shit Tyson…you just had to say it, didn’t ya.

And with that the brawl between Revolution XXX and well, I don’t know what the other three truly have in common…oh wait…ahhh, yes…but they begin to start fight in the middle of the hallway. In the midst of the brawl, with one last look back at his allies, possibly even friends, Alexander steps out of the building and without caring about Moose tosses him into the back of a pickup truck before peeling out of the arena parking lot.

*Fade out on a sadistic grin from Alexander behind the wheel*

[fasteddie]

(The ninja cams come up on The Secret Location of Ultimo Inc. Roving office. It comes up onto a meeting room where Steel, and Podvod are sitting and waiting. Tytan walks in with a hooded VK DeBeers.)


(Removing the hood.) Tytan: Sorry about the hood DeBeers but I am just following the Boss's orders.

DeBeers: I understand, we all have our enemies but I am not one of them.

Steel: Let's just say we need to trust you first before we give you the keys to the car.

DeBeers: What the hell are you talking about?

Podvod: Let's just say we have a deal for you.

DeBeers: This ought to be good, because what can you offer to me?

Steel: You want power?

DeBeers: Don't we all. I mean why would Tytan be putting up with the shit you do to him if he didn't want it?

Steel: I can give you it too?

DeBeers: I am not going to be your pin cushion.

Steel: You don't have to be. I have a different offer for you...a partnership.

DeBeers:I am listening.

Steel: Well. (Steel then looks over to Tytan and then motions to the ninjacam. Tytan sees it walks over and then crushes the lens.)

BLACKOUT

[Jack Quinn]

<we cut to LJ Bennett's office where LJ is on the phone, and LD Williams is sitting waiting for him to hang up>

LJB: ..........right, yeah he was here..........nothing? You sure?...........I see. Of course.............So there is a case then..............excellent..............no not yet, if we change our mind, we will call back..........yes let us know immediately..............right. <Bennett hangs up>

LDW: Well?

LJB: No one has seen anything

LDW: So he just disappeared

LJB: India is a big place

LDW: Right. So what next?

LJB: Well, there are several options. Pressing charges is one

LDW: Moose would never go for that, you know that

LJB: This is out of his hands

LDW: You want to risk losing an ally?

LJB: True.......we could terminate his contract

LDW: That wouldn't fly either, Moose isn't the only one that will want a little revenge for this stunt

LJB: I was hoping you would think that way. I hope Darling realizes what he has done.

LDW: He better kill Moose while he has the chance, if not.....

LJB: If not, he is going to WISH we fired him

[blownspot]

<Stank is on the phone.>

Stank - Good... ... .... ... No as far as I can tell Fire and Lucky are off to the Caribbean... .... There was nothing to be done about it... .... ... then you should ask Davin or Rick... .... ... Uhhh Alex... right... ... ... ... He uh... He's busy with something... ... He can't afford to be distracted right now... ... Sure I'll tell him when I see him... ... .... Good. How did it go with Nate?... uh huh. .... .... Uh huh... Interesting... Are Blackdragon and Ax-Man with you?... Alexis... You need to be careful... ... I haven't really followed up on that... ... ... ... Anyway he isn't answering his phone... ... ... Jared and I haven't spoken in years... ... ... whatever. What do you plan on doing next? ... ... .. .... uh huh... ... ... uh huh... fine... thanks for the update Alexis.... I'll tell them you're trying to reach them... later.

<Stank ends the call. He then leaves the Destroyitarium and walks over to Rick's office giving the Hall of Random encounters a wide birth. He knocks once, then enters.>

Stank - Rick we need to talk.

GMtR - If it's about DeBeers I can't help you. Bennett is the one who keeps putting you two together.

Stank - No. It's not about that shitfuck...

GMtR - Then if it's about Chris Cole...

Stank - It ain't about him either... It's about the Darlings.

GMtR - Oh... what about them?

Stank - Tell me what you know about them.

<Camera fades>

[DevSop]

*Meanwhile*

We're focused on what looks to be the really, really, REALLY bad part of town when a pick-up truck comes flying down an alley and it looks like it's going out of the way to make sure it hits every single pot hole and really give the shocks a work out. All of a sudden the truck skids to a stop in front of an old, boarded up building. The driver side door opens and Alexander Darling steps out with a large backpack and he walks around to the back of the truck and he steps up into the bed. There is groaning coming from the large bag that contains Moosehead Jack.

Alexander: Perfect, you're almost awake and just in time for the true show to begin.

Moose: Guh...gah...

Alexander: Don't try to speak yet. We'll have plenty of time for that all week. We may even wind up being best friends when this is all over Moose. Wouldn't that be swell?

Alexander starts dragging the bag towards the edge of the cab and as he jumps down, he tries to lift the bag but he drops it and it slams into the concrete with a thud.

Fuck, that had to hurt. Sorry. But damn, you could help a little. Carrying all this dead, it's murder on the back.

Alexander drags Moose along the ground to the door of the building which seems to have a very, very high-tech lock on it that just seems to be really out of place on a building like this. Alex quickly punches in a code and we hear the click of the door unlocking and Alexander opens the door and drags Moose in. The room is pitch black, but Alex continues to move along as it seemingly unfazes him. Without being able to see what's going on, it tough to tell exactly what's happening but we have heard the sounds a few noticeable things; a bag unzipping, quite a few thuds and bangs, the unmistakable clicks of at least two pairs of handcuffs, and a few other indeterminable things.

Suddenly a single light bulb turns on above a chair and we see that Moosehead Jack is sitting in it with his feet handcuffed to the support beams of the building, his arms are tied in a V-shape to long pieces of chain that are hanging from the ceiling, and he has numerous cuts and bruises on his face already.

From just behind the view of the camera, we hear Alexander moving around when he begins to speak again,
Alexander: Almost to wake up Moose. The show really needs to begin. I really don't think now is the time to test my patience.

All of a sudden, another single light bulb flicks on above another table. A table at which Alexander sits at. And on this table are toys, lots of lots of toys. Knives and other cutting tools of all shapes and sizes, assorted international objects of varying use, and some special gifts that we'll leave secret for now. Alexander's head has been in his hands the entire time we took a look at the table, but slowly his head rises and we can see that Alex, while looking completely disheveled also has a calm, steely look in his eyes. He slowly moves his eyes from one side of the table to the other and then he takes a long, hard look at his own hands.

He quickly makes the sign of the cross,
Alexander: Forgive me father, for I shall sin. Remember me master, for I shall inflict pain. Save me (something said very low), for I shall need it.

Alexander claps his hands together and starts to stand up, and as he does so, he hits a button on the table and we hear a whoosh as 4 or 5 buckets of water quickly fall on Moose drenching him

Moose: Huh, wha...where am I?

Moose looks around and seems to remember what's been happening. He keeps his expression neutral, but we both know that a part of him may truly be scared of what may happen next.

Moose: Just keep writing your own death certificate.

Alexander: You really are in no place to talk Moose. From now on you shall only speak when I say so.

Moose: Fuck You.

All of a sudden Moose shivers and twitches for a second.

Alexander: As I was saying; you will speak when I say you can. Otherwise, well...let's see, you're wet, you're sitting in a puddle of water, you're barefoot, and this little buzzer here will send a jolt to that little wire anytime I feel like. Are we clear?

Moose: ...

Alexander: Wow, you're a quick learner. I was actually hoping you'd fight back more to start. But now that the formalities are out of the way, I do believe we are ready to begin.

Alexander walks around the table and picks up a small switchblade. He comes to a stop directly behind Moose and with only the two lightbulbs, the look is quite disturbing.

BOOYAH, Bitch!

*Fade out as we hear a scream*

[National Champion Chris Cole]

Stank is walking down the hallway talking on his cell phone

S: Yes Mom......No that won't be ne-........Can't I just call you back after the show........No I'm not trying to ignore you.....You know I'm still your special guy...

Chris Cole steps in front of Stank and drills him in the head with a barbed wire baseball bat. Stank hits the ground. Cole picks up the phone.

CC: Lucas is going to have to call you back.

Cole continues to pound Stank with the barbed bat. He uses the barbs like a cheese grater across Stank's forehead. Just as Stank is about to pass out Cole pulls his face real close.

CC: I will not be ignored. I told everybody that I'd get my match even if I had to take it.

He drops Stank into a pool of his own blood and walk away.

[blownspot]

<Stank turns over onto his hands and knees, he turns his head and spies his phone. He crawls over to his phone, picks it up, and checks it to see if it still works. Satisfied he sits up on his knees and wipes at the gash on his forehead. He looks at the blood on his hands, then squints as more blood runs down into his eyes. He wipes the blood from his eyes and stands, steadying himself against a nearby wall. SFJ#4 wanders onto the scene.>

SFJ#4 - You just got knocked the fuck out by "The Main Event" Chris Cole. Any thoughts while you're still conscious?

Stank - Yeah Traci... which way did he go?

SFJ#4 - That way.

Stank - Ok then I'll go this way.

SFJ#4 - Wait! You mean you're not going to go after him?

Stank - Nope.

SFJ#4 - Why not?

Stank - Because Traci I'm trying new things. Sure I could go after Cole, stomp his ass into the ground, beat him then beat him some more, but why waste the effort?

SFJ#4 - Because we all know you to be the kind of guy who doesn't take any shit.

Stank - And I have no intention on letting this slide, but that will take care of itself. I don't book the matches, but I'm sure the powers that be are watching. Cole clearly wants to fight me. I am happy to oblige him. Not because he hit me in the head with a barbed wire bat. It's not the first time that has happened. No... I'll oblige him because that's what I'll do to ANYONE who wants to fight me. You only need ask. Now, I had already accepted his challenge, but apparently he wasn't paying attention. Or maybe he was and the bat to my skull was just some extra curriculars. Right now I don't have time for extra curriculars. Ain't no amount of baseball bats or barbed wire going to change that. So Cole... don't worry. You got my attention. You want the match... make it happen and I will gladly beat your ass.

<DH Magnusson and Outback Jack appear on the scene.>

DHM - You look like sundried shit.

OBJ - Tytan or Debeers?

Stank - Cole.

DHJ - We're off lookin for Spin.

<OBJ throws Stank a towel.>

Stank - I'll go with you.