[Attitude Adjuster]

What's all this Promo of the Year bullshit? What match did Moose promo? What feud did he enhance? Who did he give a rub to?

[Jack Quinn]

Dec 22, 2008 21:27:40 GMT -5 blownspot said:

**OOC**

Moose, I am in awe.

Praise from Caesar

[Eric O'Mac]

*The crowd in Springfield is anxious as the music for Carl Coolname hits the PA system. Carl, well dressed, comes out to a modest ovation, walking down to the ring. In the ring is the 15 Minutes of Fame set, complete with Erictron 6000. Carl gets in the ring, takes a seat, and takes a microphone.*

Carl: Welcome to 15 Minutes of Fame with Eric O'Mac...

*The crowd explodes at the mention of Eric O'Mac.*

Carl:...guest-starring Carl Coolname.

*The crowd quiets down.*

Carl: Eric is still recovering from his injury, but I am glad to take over his spot here on 15 Minutes of Fame! It's much better than the new edition of Monopoly that came out over Christmas.

Anyways, I have no idea who I'm suppose to interview this week. The Rick had Phantos and Lucios lined up, but I balked at the idea. I mean, I don't need them to tell me that they are the best tag team ever, because it's bullshit. Revolution XX was the best tag team ever. But that's another story for another day.

People have asked me why I haven't been an active competitor in the OOWF for over 3 years. Personally, that's an issue that I'm still not comfortable discussing. So, let's move on.

...

...


...

Personally, I've got nothing more to talk about. So, I'll think I'll have a soda.

*Carl grabs a soda. As he pops the top off, BEAST POPS OUT! Carl, at the sight of this, starts screaming! Carl, covering his ass, runs up the ramp, and as he looks behind his shoulder, he suddenly runs into...

Alexander Darling!!!! Darling, grabs Carl and hits him with the SMACKDOWN! Eric's finishing manuever! The crowd boos as Carl is knocked out and Darling just stares holes in him. The crowd continues to boo until the lights go out!!!!

The lights stay out for about 10 seconds....and when the lights come on Beast is gone. Carl is still knocked out and Darling doesn't seem to know what's going on. Fade out. *

[Mr. Dashbee]

<Bryce Larson & Nayr meet-up in the lockerroom, and Bryce is weilding a present.>

N: Hey asshole!

BL: Now, is that anyway to talk to the man who brought you this Christmas gift?

N: For reals? What is it?

BL: I can't tell you, open it you midget!

N: Midget...

<Nayr opens the gift to find a brand new PSP!>

N: How did you know!

BL: Well, you keep hooking up a PlayStation in every hotel room we stay in, so I thought you'd like this. Plus, it were the PSP or a hooker. I figured you knew how to use the PSP.

N: Dude...you totally made the right call! PSP? Sweet!

<Random Hooker # 69 enters the room.>

RH#69: Which one of you is Bryce?

BL: That's me. <Turns to Nayr.> I couldn't pass up the hooker, though. So go play that thing in the lobby or something. I got big people business to tend to.

<Nayr talks as he leaves the room, playing his PSP.>

N: Gladly! Hey, you two kids have fun <Nayr winks at Bryce, the turns his attention back to the PSP.> Extra man...get there...extra man!

[Fire-Babe]

Morning at Ric's Coffee Shop, and assorted OOWF staff and talent are EATING~! breakfast. Firewoman is drinking her non-sponsorship coffee out of a Dunkin Donuts coffee mug, and eating, like, sticks and twigs, or whatever health nuts eat for breakfast, and doing the crosswood puzzle in the paper. She is joined by Davin Moreland, on crutches, and Samantha Darling, who is carrying both trays.

SD: Mind if we sit here?

Firewoman doesn't look up or answer, but with one move kicks the chairs out for them. Samantha appears confused, but Davin nods and they sit.

DM: Davin Moreland loves him his steak and eggs on match-day.

FW: Meat is murder.

DM: Huh?

FW: I refuse to participate in the violent slaughter of--

DM: Firewoman refusing to participate in violence? Davin Moreland finds that ironic. Davin Moreland finds that hypocritical. Davin Moreland is going to sit here and eat his steak and not feel a damn bit guil--

Firewoman looks up for the first time, ignoring Davin completely, and looking right at Samantha

FW: You. Can you get rid of these ninja cams for a minute? I'd like to talk to Davin. The real Davin, not Douchebag Davin.

SD: Well, I could send them away.

FW: No, I need you to take them away. I need to talk to Davin alone.

SD: Just who do you think you are?

FW: I am making a simple request. Let's not do this the hard way this morning....

DM: Davin Moreland is fine with this. Samantha can take them on a tour of...something.

Samantha glares at Firewoman, but gets up, kisses Davin on the forehead (gag) and gets up. She somehow convinces the ninja cams to follow her. Well, all but one who hides behind a potted plant to see what this is all about.

DM: Davin Moreland is all ears.

FW: Stop.

DM: Just making sure they're gone.

FW: No, not that. Well, YES that, but I meant the match tonight. Against Stank.

DM: Are you saying what i think.....No, this conversation is over.

FW: Really? She grabs his crutches and puts them out of his reach by tossing them over her shoulder....loudly and kind of far. They crash ito the back of SYB's chair.

SYB: Heeeeey!!!

FW: I guess if this conversation is over, you'll just be able to get right up and walk away now, eh?

DM:.......

FW:.......

DM: If we weren't partners right now I'd--

FW: Oh, you'd what? Limp on over and do something?

DM: .........

FW:.........

DM: Alright, get to the point.

FW: That IS my point. You're going to try to defend the world championship tonight at Mayhem, and you can't even walk.

DM: Stank isn't much better off.

FW: I don't care about Stank, I care about--

DM: Awwww....how sweet.

FW: -- the belt staying with RunDEA, where it belongs.

DM: Then you have nothing to worry about.

FW: ........

DM: .........

FW: .........

DM: What? Geez, you wanted to talk, now talk!

FW: No one would blame you if you asked Rick to postpone the match for the PPV or even the show after that, so you could recover. It's not like everyone DIDN'T see you nearly Owen Hart yourself during your match--

DM: Too soon!!

FW: The POINT is that--

DM: The point is you don't think Davin Moreland can win this week. Didn't I tell you what I was going to do?

FW: Yes, but....

DM: Okay, let me put this in terms YOU can understand. Is there anything on this PLANET that would keep you OUT of the ring with Tytan this week? Anything????

FW: ..........

DM: No, there isn't. Short of an asteroid hitting the earth you would go in that ring, and even then you'd probably find in the wreckage somewhere, and, I don't know, dismember his corpse.

FW: No, that comes close to zombies, and we know how I feel about that.

DM: Okay, think about your other dance partners of late....Tyson, Attitude Adjuster....and I'm sure I could pull out some other names from your past as well--

Firewoman glares at Davin

DM: Ah, there it is. See? You could be hung up with 20 IVs and have three of four limbs in a cast, and you'd have Lucky wheel you to the ring to defend your belt and maybe get a bit of payback too. Not to mention, the only time I think I've ever seen you look the least bit happy or joyful is when you're crushing someone.

FW: So?

DM: So this is the same thing.

FW: But see, no it isn't because--

DM: We've had this conversation. We've compared medication notes. We've met in the ring....remember?

FW: Yeah....but....

DM: Then think about if the situation was reversed, and I asked you to postpone your match with Tytan.

FW: ........

DM: ........

FW: Fine.

DM. Fine. Davin Moreland thanks you for your concern. Davin Moreland is glad you care about his well being.

FW: Firewoman cares about who holds the world championship.

DM: Uh huh. Davin Moreland doesn't buy that.

FW: Firewoman doesn't care what -- Ugh, I hate myself now. I'm going.

DM: Can you toss me my crutches back please?

Firewoman sees Samantha coming back

FW: Sam'll get 'em for you. She's good at that sort of thing

SD: What am I good at?

FW: Fetching. Retrieving.

Firewoman gets up and leaves. Sam walks over to where the crutches are and brings them back.

SD: How'd these get over here.

DM: Firewoman threw them.

SD: Oh. Odd how that doesn't surprise me in the least. Is that all she wanted?

DM: Nope.

SD:........

DM: .......

SD: Are you going to tell me?

DM: Nope.

fade

[The Canadian Content]

Dec 22, 2008 17:28:49 GMT -5 The Jewish Cunthead said:

*OOC* aaand there's next year's promo of the year.

Out-fucking-standing Chuckles.

Agreed.

[Demko]

We open on a heartwarming scene. The IHOP gang, Fezzik, The Lovely & Talented Dorothy Mantooth, Skurge, SYB and The Amnesiac are all gathered together in the palatial IHOP locker room. They've setup a Christmas tree in one corner of the room, and all five of them are surrounding it. There are presents underneath the tree. Some of them are decorated in red and green, others with a blue and white wrapping paper. SYB stands up, grabs one of the blue and white ones and looks at the tag.

SYB: To Solly. From Fezzik. Happy Hanukah. Aww, thanks ya giant bastard. What could this possibly be?

Solly opens the present. He takes out a very long black cloak, and looks confusedly at it.

Fezzik: It's a holocaust cloak. I got some good use out of that sucker. And now I offer it to you.

Skurge: Wow, that's funny on so many levels. I have to say that that is the most ironic Hanukah present in the history of the holiday.

SYB just stands there, holding the cloak, staring at it.

SYB: Why the fuck do they call it a holocaust cloak, anyway?

Suddenly, there's a knock at the locker room door. The Amnesiac springs to his feet, going over to answer it. As he opens the door, standing outside it is Monkh, The Amnesiac's previous manager. Monkh has grown since we last saw him, but still only stands at 5'4", y'know, being 14 and all.

Monkh: The Amnesiac!

AMN: MONKH!

The two hug briefly, before looking at each other.

AMN & M: Fag!

Monkh comes into the locker room. The rest of IHOP has assembled behind The Amnesiac.

AMN: Guys, you remember Monkh, right?

SYB: Yeah, I think we almost ran him over in a tank, right?

AMN: Uh, I don't think I remember that. Anyhow, Monkh? This is Solly Ya Bastard and Skurge... my tag team partners.

Monkh bows briefly, smiling. He reaches out to shake hands. SYB and Skurge shake. Monkh turns his attention to Dorothy Mantooth.

M: And you must be the lovely and talented Dorothy Mantooth. I remember you. How could anyone forget such a hot piece of-

AMN: AND this is Fezzik.

Fezzik goes to shake Monkh's hand, but his hand winds up enveloping Monkh's entire hand, all the way up to the mid-forearm.

Fezzik: Nice to meet you.

AMN: So what are you doing here?

M: Well, I told you on the phone that Uncle Tranh finally heard that they'd lifted the ban on non-essential staff-

AMN: Yeah, but they did that months ago.

M: Well, since I moved in with Uncle, he hasn't been able to afford much, what with having to feed and clothe me. So our TV got cancelled. We couldn't watch the OOWf anymore. When he finally heard about the ban being lifted, he actually got pretty pissed off.

AMN: What? Why?

M: Well, he said that you told him you'd come and get me when I was allowed to be on the road with you again.

The Amnesiac looks like he's been gut-punched.

AMN: Oh, kid... I'm so sorry. I just got caught up with everything going on around here... and then I took that turn for the worse... and then we won these Chimpionships... I just forgot.

M: It's okay... I understand. But I was wondering if I could join you guys back on the road again?

The Amnesiac looks to SYB and Skurge. Both of them nod solemnly.

AMN: Well then, I guess that's a yes. C'mon... I think I might be able to find a Christmas present over here for you.

M: I'm totally not Christian... don't you remember that?

AMN: So you're telling me you don't want a present. Is that what you're saying?

M: Oh... no way! I'll take all the Christmas presents you give me!

The IHOP gang, with their new addition, head back over to the tree to continue opening presents.

*FADE TO BLACK*

[Outback Frito Pendejo]

*In the Fear Us locker room, LD Williams is on the phone. From off camera, we hear OBJ periodically cursing, and belching*

LD: That's right, a case of the biggest brass knuckles you have, and the card should read "Merry Christmas from LD and Donnie"...and tell the delivery guy not to make any sudden movements, and to keep his hands in plain sight all the time...OK, thanks. *hangs up phone*

OBJ: Why'd you add Viper's name to the card?

LD: God knows he isn't going to remember a present, so this will make her feel a little better. And with that, my Christmas shopping is over.

OBJ: Good, then you can give me a hand over here with Wally's present. I never realized it was so hard to gift wrap a pimp cane.

[Riot Act]

We cut to the backstage area where Tyson Kincaid stands against a wall, fiddling with his iPod. He’s wearing a San Antonio Spurs t-shirt, blue denim jeans and has what appears to be a pair of high-end earbuds in his ears.

From just off screen, we see a hand reach out and tap Kincaid on the shoulder. Tyson turns around and takes the earbuds out of his ears.

TK: What do you want?

Moosehead Jack steps into frame.

MHJ: You know what I want. Have you given any more thought to what I asked you to do for me?

TK: Yes.

MHJ: And?

TK: And I’ve decided that I’m willing to do anything it takes to get to Firewoman.

MHJ: So that means that you’ll hurt Crete tonight?

TK: Like I said, I’ll do anything.

Moose flashes a sadistic grin.

MHJ: I’m glad to hear that. It looks like we might be able to help each other after all. Merry Christmas, Tyson.

Moose turns and walks away. Kincaid eyes him for a moment before turning around and putting his earbuds back in as the scene fades to black.

[Fire-Babe]

Firewoman is walking in the snow, wearing what appears to be a new, longer leather winter jacket, with scarf and ear muffs (her present from Alexander), red hair standing out, a stark contrast to the white snow. It is an incredibly peaceful scene, like one that might go on OOWF Christmas cards, available now, at the OOWF ShopZone. But the peace is broken by SFJ420 who comes running up to Firewoman, who mostly no sells her until she begins to ask questions.

SFJ420: OH. EM. GEE. I'm like so totally glad I found you.

FW: I wish I could say the same.

SFJ420: Why aren't you back at the Suites, enjoying a RunDEA Christmas?

FW: We already exchanged presents, and it's just not my thing.

SJF420: What? How can you not like Christmas? That's so totally fucked up!

FW: Did you really just say 'fucked up' in the same sentence as Christmas?

SFJ420: Heeheehee...I guess I did. I guess that's a lump of coal in my stocking.

FW: How could there possibly be room for one more?

SFJ420: So, why are you out here?

FW: Because, Moonbeam, this is a special time of year, regardless of what you celebrate. The long nights remind us of the gift of the day light. The year cycles around, reminding us that all things come and go in an endless cycle. The time is ripe for turning inward, and reflecting on the past year, and making resolutions for the new one.

SFJ420: Wow.....that is so......deeeeeep......dude.....

FW: Yeah.....

SFJ420: So like.....

FW: You know there's an old folk custom that I'm very fond of. Long, long ago, folks would light a fire and try to keep it going for 12 nights, in order to encourage the sun to return.

SFJ420: Wow... a fire that lasts more than a week? That's so cool.

FW: Yeah. With all the traveling we do, I obviously can't recreate that....but I find ways.

SFJ420: That's so awesome. Merry Christmas, Firewoman.

FW: Uh...yeah, Merry Christmas, Moonbeam. Let's go, it's getting colder.

SFJ420: Yeah! Davin Moreland got me some chocolate donuts.

Firewoman and Moonbeam walk away and out of the frame. The camera pulls back, and then rotates, catching a golden glow in the distance. The camera ignores Firewoman and Moonbeam and goes towards the glow. As we get closer we see it's a warehouse of some kind that appears to be about 75 percent on fire. The local fire department has arrived and is getting things organized. The camera zooms in closer to a sign that reads Ultimo, Inc.

[Jack Quinn]

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Springfield, New York

Twas the night or Mayhem, and all were in the house
No matches were going, the arena was quiet as a mouse
Mayhem wasn’t here yet, would the people even care?
Rick hoped that Mayhem soon would all be there

The wrestlers were waiting, wondering what was up with his fed
While visions of main events and title runs danced through their heads
And Erlana in her sweater and Rick in his Reds cap
Had just called in the local workers, those poor jobber saps

When outside the arena there arose such a clatter
GM the Rick jumped to his feet to see what was the matter
Away to the doors he flew calling the noise an asshole
Kicked open the doors and grabbed a clangy pole

The moon on the hood of Davin’s new GTO
Gave a luster of mid-day to the lot’s fresh fallen snow
Then what to his wondering eyes should appear,
But a pissed off Moose saying Mayhem is here

Moose came into the arena asking about a sneak attack
Rick just rolled his eyes, same ol’ Moosehead Jack
With a snarl and a yell, his voice like gravel came,
He listed his writers, calling them all by their name

Thanks Ryan, thanks Fire, thanks LD and Mikey!
Thanks Tex, thanks Crete, thanks Sop and Tommy
Into the arena, to Rick’s office door
I’ve thanked you all once, I will thank you once more

Moose went one by one, and thanked everyone for their work
Even DevilSoprano, who is kind of a jerk
And flipping a finger, cause that’s how he rolls
Giving a nod, out the door he goes

He walked through the snow, and gave a loud shout
And up rolled a car blaring “mama said knock you out”
They flew down the street, before they went out of sight
Moose yelled “Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”

Merry Christmas everyone - Moose

TYSON KINCAID vs. CONCRTE TG

Kincaid comes down to the ring, to some modest cheers. The OOWF fans want to be behind him, as he struggles with his demons, but when he's matched up against perennial fan favorite, Concrete Takaken Gryfon, that's as good as you could hope for, in terms of crowd response. Joe Satriani's guitar riff fires up and the crowd, who was already standing, goes wild for their hero.

Gryfon and Kincaid meet in the ring, and Concrete tries to give some words of encouragement. Sterling Glaw gives instructions, and Gryfon holds out his hand for the "Good Luck" hand shake, which Tyson returns. Aww. DING DING.

Gryfon and Tyson circle a moment or two, and then lock up. Some traditional back and forth arm locks and getting-out-of-arm locks. Tyson catches Gryfon at just the right moment and arm drag! Gryfon hops up and Tyson catches him again, and this time, Tyson speeds it up a bit, jumping on Gryfon and attaching him with forearms. Glaw begins a count, and Tyson voluntarily lets up at three. He gets up, and pulls Gryfon up with him by the hair and snaps a quick suplex. They get up again, and Tyson whips Gryfon into the ropes. Gryfon bounces off and Tyson catches him in with a snap mare that flips Gryf over. Tyson follows it up with a double drop kick to the back, and then grabs Gryfon and pulls him into a dragon sleeper. But Gryfon is not out yet, and is able to push Tyson off before he really gets the hold locked on, leaving both men seated on the mat. Tyson grabs Crete's head, and pulls him back, and goes for a pin, getting a two-count. Crete kicks out and both men stand. Tyson is feeling pretty good about himself and jumps towards Crete, but Crete is a veteran folks. Crete grabs Tyson and after a Russian Leg Sweep, rolls Tyson over for 1.5 count. Tyson kips up after his kick out and tries to catch Crete off guard in with a super kick, but Crete catches the kick. He shakes his finger at Tyson Hulk Hogan- style. But Tyson simply smiles and hits an Enziguiri. Crete goes down, and Tyson turns towards the ropes to set up a moonsault, or some flippiness, and sees Moosehead Jack standing at ring side. Moose has his characteristic Cheshire cat grin, and is holding a metal chair. The two stare at each other for a moment as the referee tries to remind Tyson he's actually in the middle of something. Moose continues smiling, and tries to slide the chair in under the ropes. It's unclear whether or not Tyson will use it, but he doesn't get much of a chance to think about it, because at that very moment, while his back is turned, Gryfon recovers and reaches up and...Schoolboy Roll-up! Glaw starts the count one...two...THREE!
WINNER in 10:11 – Concrete TG

Crete barely gets to his feet after the match when Kincaid gets up, kicks Crete in the gut, and DRIVES him to the mat with a DDT ON THE CHAIR! Kincaid stands over Crete for a moment, then looks at Moose who is grinning and heading up the ramp.

FEAR US & SPIN HANSEN vs. THE CHCIKENSHIT HEELS & DAMON WRATH

Spin to start things off for his team, while TCH tries to do paper, rock, scissors with Damon, and they screw it up, so Johnny and AA leave Wrath to start things out, TCH bickering in the corner the whole time. Collar and elbow tie-up gets nowhere, and a second one also goes to a stalemate. Test of strength also goes to a draw, as AA yells at Damon to kick Spin in the gut or something. Hansen finally grabs a headlock as Johnny yells at Damon to pull his hair, and Wrath sends Spin to the ropes, and matching shoulder blocks put both guys down. Back up and a brief stare down and both guys tag out, OBJ in and Johnny in reluctantly. AA talks Johnny up, and JA tells Damon to watch and learn how to cheat properly. Of course, Jack decks Johnny with a right hand immediately. OBJ has his way with Adrenaline, pounding him all over the ring, and it's a tag to Williams. Legal double teaming in the corner, and when the ref sends OBJ away, LDW pops Johnny with a stiff left jab, and Johnny rolls out to the floor. JA kills time and rolls back in on his side of the ring, tagging to AA and asking why he didn't come help out. Capps in and promises to fare better, but he eats a running knife edge chop from Williams, then a standing dropkick. Snap suplex - as much as AA can be snapped anyway - and tag back to Jack. OBJ drops some elbows, and then an inverted suplex, Jack holds the headlock and tags to Spin. Great six man tag work here and they just rotate out on AA and wear him down. But eventually, Spin sends AA to the ropes and Damon gets a blind tag, and when Spin goes down for the backdrop, Wrath drills him with a big DDT. Damon puts the boots to Hansen, and works him over in the corner. Tag to Johnny, who gets some cheap shots in and quickly tags Wrath back in. Some more offense on Spin, and AA tags in... then quickly back out, TCH content to let Wrath do all the heavy lifting. Tilt awhirl slam by Damon gets two, and Johnny hops in illegally to draw in OBJ, allowing Damon and AA to cheat. Capps pats Damon on the shoulder as if to say, "that's how you do it," and Wrath shoves him out of the way to stay on the attack. Spine buster and Spin's in trouble, and Johnny tags himself in, much to the chagrin of Damon. Johnny drags Spin to his feet, measures him, and plants a good right hand on him, putting him back down. But Adrenaline gets cocky on a follow-up, and Spin gets an inverted atomic drop, then another. Johnny tries to fight back, but an Irish whip is reversed, and Spin power slams Adrenaline out of his boots. HOT TAG WILLIAMS! L.D.'s in and hits everything that moves, big hip toss for AA and clotheslining Damon to the floor. Johnny staggers up and Williams takes him right back down, but AA breaks up the STF before it can be applied. Jack's back in to deal with AA, but Damon drags OBJ to the floor... then Spin follows out with a dropkick off the top rope!! However, that leaves Williams alone in the ring with TCH, and when he goes for the DDT on JA, AA slaps on THE CLAW~! Capps has Williams in trouble, but as he's doing that, Spin and OBJ sneak back in, look at each other... and it's the CALL OF THE WILD on Johnny!! AA sees this, yells at Damon for help, but when he sees none on the way, AA bails to the floor. That leaves Johnny unconscious in the ring with three guys... so Williams just pins him!
WINNERS in 14:54: FEAR US & SPIN HANSEN



IHOP vs. POE, SEAMUS MCNASTY & MOOSEHEAD JACK – OOWF Campeonas de Trios Title Match

When we get back from commercials, Poe, Seamus McNasty and Moosehead Jack are already in the ring, as who wants to sit through four different entrances? Then “Grab Them Cakes” blasts over the Springfield Dome sound system and the three members of IHOP, Skurge, S-Y-B and of course the Amnesiac walk down the ramp. S-Y-B, ever the sports enthusiast, takes a moment to yell “Yankees suck!”, which I assume would get some heel heat here. If it wouldn’t, he just gave them the finger. Anyway, your referee is Mel Creech, who has got his hands full tonight as a pier 6 brawl breaks out to open the match. S-Y-B goes for the dreaded slap on McNasty, and connects, but of course McNasty no sells it and hammers S-Y-B with shots until he tumbles to the floor. Skurge gets an elbow in the face and then is taken down with a clothesline by Jack. He decides to take a powder as well. Amnesiac and Poe are grappling, neither able to get the other hand as McNasty follows S-Y-B outside. Jersey Turnpike! Creech doesn’t see this, as he’s focused on what’s going on in the ring as Jack nails Amnesiac with some kidney shots. Amnesiac is whipped into the corner, he stumbles out awkwardly, and is lifted up and taken down with a double suplex from Jack and Poe. Jack looks up at Creech, grins, and rolls to the outside as Poe covers. One, two, and Amnesiac gets the shoulder up. He and Poe are the legal men apparently. Poe doesn’t skip a beat, he looks for the Desert Scorpion and locks it in in the centre of the ring. S-Y-B rolls into the ring with a stomp to the back to break it up. And S-Y-B allows himself to be escorted back to the corner as Skurge is in, punching away, grabbing Poe in a bear hug and yes, it’s the Smokehouse Combo as Amnesiac comes in with the lariat!
Amnesiac pins, one, two, no! But that double team move was enough to change the tide of the battle. This six man tag devolves into a three on one as S-Y-B, Amnesiac and Skurge take turns stomping away at Poe in the corner. This continues until S-Y-B makes the mistake of taunting Poe just a little too much. Poe suddenly explodes out of the corner, hitting a, well, exploder suplex on S-Y-B that sends him sailing into the turnbuckles. Poe is up, stumbling to the corner dazed he tags in McNasty! Double clothesline for a charging Skurge and Amnesiac, and boy do they ever sell it. McNasty spears the fuck out of Skurge, then hits a back cracker on Amnesiac. S-Y-B charges and tries a flying cross body, which McNasty turns into a power slam. He plays to the crowd with his battle yell, and looks all pumped up- but Jack takes the opportunity to tag himself in, obviously hungry for some blood. He stares down Poe, then catches sight of S-Y-B getting ready to dive to his corner. He catches S-Y-B’s leg in midair, and pulls S-Y-B towards him for the second his body is suspended in midair before it slams to the mat. And now he locks on the Jiendo! Skurge is in for the routine break up, and- HOLY SHIT Poe and McNasty charge into the ring and they look angry. Poe and McNasty are just beating the shit out of Skurge, and Moosehead Jack looks disgusted. He grabs S-Y-B and rolls his limp body out of the ring. The Amnesiac runs in but Poe and McNasty overwhelm him. Outside the ring, Moosehead Jack is slamming S-Y-B’s head into the guardrail over and over again. Creech is threatening to disqualify Poe and McNasty if they don’t leave the ring. McNasty and Poe look at each other. The beat down resumes as Creech calls for the bell.
WINNERS in 12:29 – by disqualification - IHOP

CHRIS COLE vs. ALEXANDER DARLING – OOWF Onslaught Championship Match

Alexander Darling, accompanied by Alexis, enters the arena first. The Darlings pause on the stage for “Prelude 12/21”, then head down the aisle as “Princes of the Universe” starts to play. Alexis gives her brother some last minute advice as “Master of Puppets” heralds OOWF Onslaught Champion Chris Cole's arrival. Cole makes his way to the ring and holds his title high before handing it to referee Davis Hightower, who displays it to the crowd and calls for the bell.
Alex and Cole circle and lock up, and Cole grabs a headlock. Alex throws him off, drops under Cole's first pass, leapfrogs the second, and catches him with a monkey flip on the third. Cole lands in the ropes and gets tangled up. He frees himself and rolls to his feet, just in time to eat a dropkick that sends him to the outside. Alex follows Cole out and pulls him to his feet. He tries an Irish whip but Cole anchors himself, pulling Alex back and ramming him sternum-first into the apron. Alex stumbles back and Cole slams his head into the apron before stuffing him back into the ring.

Cole pulls Alex to his feet and rocks him with chops against the ropes. He whips Alex across the ring and levels him with a high knee, then drives an elbow into his throat and makes a cover. Hightower counts, but Alex kicks out at two. Cole gets up and stomps away, then pulls Alex to his feet. He tries for a snap suplex but Alex blocks and reverses, floating over and raining down punches to Cole's head. Hightower forces Alex to back off and Cole gets to his knees. Alex hits the ropes behind him and bulldogs Cole into the mat. Alex rolls him over and covers, but Cole also kicks out at two.

**Ten Minutes Remaining**

Both men get to their feet. Alex feigns a lockup and kicks Cole in the stomach. Cole doubles over and Alex hits a brutal European upper cut followed by a reverse atomic drop. Alex hits the ropes and tries for a clothesline, but Cole ducks. Alex hits the opposite ropes, and Cole drives him to the mat with a spine buster. Cole bounces to his feet and leaps over Alex, coming down knee-first on his temple. Cole hooks both legs and rolls Alex up. Hightower counts One...Two...Thr-Alex kicks out!

Cole drags Alex to his feet and sends him hard into the corner, following him in with a clothesline. After a series of chops, he lifts Alex onto the top turnbuckle and starts to climb up after him. Alex fights back and they slug it out until they are both perched on the top rope. Alex suddenly grabs Cole and hits a beautiful belly-to-belly release suplex. Both men land hard and stay down, so Hightower starts to count. He reaches four before Alex crawls over and falls on Cole for the cover. One...Two...Thr-Cole rolls a shoulder just in time!

**Five Minutes Remaining**

Alex gets slowly to his feet, then winds up and kicks Cole in the head as he starts to get up. Alex rolls Cole over and grabs his arms. Curb stomp! Alex holds on and hits another one! And a third! Alex drags the nearly unconscious Cole to his feet, snarls, and hoists him for the Brainbusta. Cole squirms and throws Alex off balance, dropping behind him and pulling him into a neck breaker. Cole covers, but Alex kicks out at two.

**One Minute Remaining**

Cole gets to his feet, but has trouble staying there. He grabs Alex and tries for the Headliner, but Alex drops to one knee to block it. Alex manages a short punch to the stomach, then, as Cole stumbles back, lunges to his feet, grabbing Cole's arm on the way by. He gets behind Cole and hauls him onto his shoulders. Darling Driver! Alex falls on Cole and hooks the leg. Hightower counts One...Two...Three!
WINNER, and NEW OOWF Onslaught Champion, in 14:57, Alexander Darling!

After the match Darling holds the title high above his head, then falls to his knees. Alexis Darling joins her brother in celebration. After a few moments Darling gets to his feet and grabs a mic:

Eric, I know you can hear me. Get down here and face me LIKE A MAN!!

<the lights go out and Mama Said Knock You Out plays, but after few seconds the music stops, the lights come on and........nothing. Darling snarls and storms out of the ring and heads to the back>

PHANTOS & LUCIOS vs. BRYCE LARSON & NAYR – OOWF World Tag Team Title Match

“King of the Indies” Bryce “The Bad-Ass Dragon” Larson & Nayr (Could these two have the record for the longest named and shortest named wrestlers to ever tag together?) come down first. The fans give them a rousing reception, as their recent wins have made them extremely popular. They whisper amongst themselves until Phantos & Lucios are introduced and head to ringside. The champions finish their Aquafina bottles and throw them at Russ & Razz at the announce table. Razz stands up and appears to threaten Phantos, but Lucios steps in and can be heard telling Razz to “Sit down before you get hurt old man.” Lucios grabs a mic off the announce table and enters the ring.

Earlier this week, we requested that this match become a NON-TITLE match. Our esteemed General Manager needs to know that this match WILL NOT HAPPEN unless he grants our request.

Rick’s music blares out and he appears on the top of the ramp.

Against my better judgment, I am granting your request Lucios. This match is now a NON-TITLE match. (He stares at the ring, where Larson & Nayr are going batshit) Guys, I'm sorry. If you beat the champs tonight. I will GUARANTEE YOU a title match in the near future!

Phantos starts off with Nayr and Phantos hurls him unto a corner. Imagine that, Phantos with a size advantage! Phantos charges in and Nayr leapfrogs the masked man and snaps off a standing hurricanrana. Nayr bounces off the ropes and hits a flippy, twisting inside out splash that pops the crowd. Phantos to his feet and Nayr comes crashing in with a springboard back elbow. He covers for 2, and Lucios bull rushes the ring to break the count. Larson runs in, which draws the referee’s attention, and he ushers Bryce back to the apron. Lucios levels Nayr with a mafia kick, from behind, and Nayr crumbles to the mat as the referee turns back to the action.

Phantos takes control, with a series of deep arm drags, Nayr bouncing across the ring each time. Bulldog. Middle rope knee drop for a 1 count. Phantos stalks Nayr, and snaps off a dropkick. As Nayr gets to his feet, a second dropkick takes him back down. Phantos hits the ropes and hits a baseball slide dropkick on Nayr before he gets to his feet. Nayr tumbles to the arena floor and Larson drops down to check on his partner. Lucios enters the ring with his partner and they hits both ropes and STEREO PLANCHAS over the top rope and they come crashing into their opponents and the 4 men sprawl out on the floor.

Suddenly, The Crowd POPS as Fear Us appears on the top of the ramp. Phantos & Lucios stare down with them for a moment, and that gives Bryce and Nayr the chance to strike, pearl harboring the champs and giving LD and OBJ cause to laugh heartily. Nayr hurls Phantos into the ring post and then over the barrier as Larson drags Lucios back into the ring. Larson goes on the offensive. He hits Lucios with a Lung Blower and follows up with a HUGE Uranage. He hits a couple of moves that don’t even have NAMES yet. Larson locks in the Anaconda Vice. Lucios, struggles and is close enough to put a foot under the ropes, but can’t seem to get up after the break. Nayr runs in the ring and stands on the middle turnbuckle. Larson scrambles to the top, then climbs up backwards ON NAYR’S SHOULDERS and flies off, twisting into a corkscrew moonsault and landing back first on Lucios. The Crowd POPS and a “That was Awesome” chant begins to be heard. Larson is slow getting up, and Lucios might be dead. Fear Us claps in approval from the ramp.

Phantos has crawled back over the guardrail and finds the tag belts. He starts to climb back on the apron with them, but the referee sees him and begins to lecture. Fear Us take the opportunity to walks slowly to ringside, eyes locked on the still-not-moving-Lucios. Phantos drops back down and the referee turn to see Fear US advancing. He begins yelling at LD & OBJ, and orders them back to the back. Fear Us objects, and while they discuss matters, Phantos is back in the ring with his belt. Nayr watches the Fear Us/Referee exchange, and turns around just in time to get waffled with the belt. Phantos powders out, and the referee turns around to check on Nayr, who is bleeding. Larson and Lucios both get to their feet. Lucios reverses a whip and sends Larson into the ropes, where Phantos trips him from the outside; He turns to Phantos and gets blasted in the face with the belt. He staggers backwards, where Lucios grabs him, hits a belly to back suplex with a bridge and gets 1…2…NO! Nayr flips into the ring and breaks the pin up, landing right on Lucios’ throat. That looked Nasty! Phantos climbs back in the ring and swings the title belt around, but Nayr ducks and super kicks Phantos full in the face. Larson rolls Phantos up from behind as he recoils and gets the 1…2…3!
WINNERS in 22:18 - Bryce Larson & Nayr!

On cue, Fear Us come running down the ramp and begin to wail on the champs. LD levels Phantos with a chair shot and OBJ rains down haymakers on Lucios’ head. Larson and Nayr recover and join the fray, which proves to be a bad idea. LD KILLS Bryce with a Canadian destroyer ONTO Phantos and OBJ has no problem locking Nayr in the Croc Hunter. Familiar music strikes up, and Rick appears on the ramp with a mic.

Rick: ENOUGH! ENOUGH! Why is it we ALWAYS have to have a huge scrum all over the place after every tag title match? Phantos, you like to use that belt as a weapon? Well bring it with you Sunday. You WILL be defending them. LIVE on Pay per view. Phantos & Lucios take on Fear Us AND Bryce Larson & Nayr in TRIPLE THREAT TAG TEAM MATCH. Now get out of MY ring.

FIREWOMAN vs. TYTAN – OOWF Intercontinental Title Match

“For the Love of God” fires up over the PA, and the Springfield Crowd gets to their feet. It’s a mostly positive reaction for Tytan (although there seems to be those geeky Firewoman marks in every crowd). He makes his way down the ramp and into the ring. He does some posing on the turnbuckles for everyone. Yay. “Fire Woman” blasts now with some Championship-Style Pyro. Firewoman stands at the top of the ramp looking at all the pretty, pretty pyro. She makes her way down wearing the OOWF Intercontinental Championship Belt around her waist. Mostly booing, but the same Fire-Geeks are out there. Just to make sure, Fire flips them off too, guaranteeing a unanimous reaction. Pleased with herself, Fire climbs in the ring. She does some posing before handing her belt to Referee Sterling Glaw. Glaw holds it high in the air. This Match is for the OOWF Intercontinental Championship. Glaw hands the belt to the outside and calls for the bell…WE’RE UNDERWAY!

As soon as the bell sounds, Tytan charges Firewoman. Fire started to charge as well, but noticed Tytan coming. She manages to stop, and Matrixes under a Big Right Hand. Fire hits a SWINGING NECKBREAKER and hits the ropes for a LIONSAULT which connects. Fire hooks the leg and barely gets a 2 count, and on the kick out, Fire goes halfway across the ring. Fire tries a RUN-UP 450 SPLASH, but Tytan is already out of the way, and Fire eats canvas. Tytan is up now, and starts dropping BIG KNEES to the back of Fire’s neck. Satisfied, Tytan covers, but he barely gets a 2-count. Tytan pulls Fire up and gets her up for a Press Slam. He tosses her into the corner…it’s the CORPORATE FALLOUT! Fire staggers out of the corner and Flair Flops onto the mat.

Tytan grins and walks slowly over to Fire. He looks to hook on his SHITTY FULL NELSON SUBMISSION, but Fire is able to wiggle out and hit a DROP TOE HOLD! She tries the LIONSAULT again, and this one connects! The cover gets a long 2. Tytan tries to get up quickly; but Fire is FLYING around the ring! She Springboards off the ropes and hits a FLYING SHITTY BULLDOG on Tytan. Fire gets up and locks Tytan into a Surfboard Hold….MOTHERFUCKIN FIRESTOMP! Cover again, and this gets a long 2 count as well. Fire can’t believe this match is still going. She slaps the mat and gets right in Glaw’s face; and Glaw has to point to his OOWF Logo on his shirt because of it. Tytan takes advantage of the distraction, and ROLLS UP FIRE! He gets a LONG 2 out of that, and Fire is more irritated than anything else. Fire takes a couple steps toward Tytan, but Tytan just kicks her in the gut. Firewoman doubles over, and Tytan hooks her in and hoists her up. He’s looking for a POWERBOMB…but…YOU CAN’T POWERBOMB FIREWOMAN! She quickly nails a couple of punches and snaps off a HURRICARANA. Fire tries to get over to cover, but she eats TWO FEET TO HER GRILL! Fire stumbles around glossy-eyed and falls down.

Tytan makes the “It’s Over” signal to the crowd. He picks up Firewoman and places her on the top turnbuckle. He picks her up, he’s looking for THE ULTIMO ENDING, but Fire wiggles out of it and REVERSES to a FLAMETHROWER! Tytan is down! Firewoman is down! Glaw is counting! Glaw gets to 6 before Fire can get to her feet. Fire slowly walks over, and Tytan, who was apparently playing possum, gets to his knees and starts drilling Fire with PUNCHES TO THE GUT. This culminates with Tytan CLOTHESLINING Firewoman over the top rope and out to the floor. Tytan’s not waiting, and he goes after her. IRISH WHIP into the BARRIER! IRISH WHIP into the STEEL STAIRS! Fire might be broken. He kicks Firewoman all the way to the Montenegran Announce Table. He hooks Firewoman up again, and is looking for another POWERBOMB…but, if Tytan was paying attention oh, 3 minutes ago or so…he’d know that YOU CAN’T POWERBOMB FIREWOMAN! He gets Firewoman up, but she easily reverses into a TOR-NA-DO DDT…RIGHT THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE! Tytan is DOWN! Firewoman is DOWN! Glaw is still COUNTING! And eventually, he stops counting; because he hit 10 while he was counting.
YOUR DECISION in 9:17 by DOUBLE COUNTOUT…NO CONTEST!

DAVIN MORELAND vs. STANK – OOWF World Heavyweight Title Match

“Skin” comes on as Stank’s Jumbotron comes on the screen. The crowd batshits themselves as they get to their feet. Stank points out to the crowd and soaks in the ovation as he climbs in the ring and poses on the turnbuckles for everyone. Senior Referee Davis Hightower looks on as the music continues. That is, until the lights go out, and the first violin strains of “Lux Aeterna” start to come out of the PA System. The crowd that was cheering so loudly just a second ago is now booing just as loud. A full 90 seconds goes by before Davin Moreland appears…on crutches, and is accompanied by Samantha Darling, who is looking on dutifully. He’s slowly making his way down the ramp, and the crowd has ramped up their hatred, as beer and trash starts to follow them. No real surprise there. Davin doesn’t appear dressed to compete, as he’s not wearing his normal attire. However, he’s not wearing the Mafia Suit either. Instead, he’s settled on a Douchebag Shirt, some Douchebag Jeans, and what appear to be Douchebag Boots as well. At least they aren’t furry boots. They get to the ring, and he and Samantha make a big production about getting him inside. He’s finally in the ring, and Stank looks on incredulously as Davin starts to crutch his way around the ring. Samantha hands him a microphone from the outside, and apparently we’re going to be treated to some words of wisdom from Davin. Yippee.

Davin: Stank. How is Stank this evening?

*Stank is completely motionless and emotionless*

Davin: Good to hear…good to hear…Anyway Stank, Davin Moreland has some news for Stank. Davin Moreland is a messenger. Davin Moreland is FedEx.

*Stank yawns*

Davin: So, would Stank like to hear the news that Davin Moreland has for Stank?

*Stank gives the universal “Get on with it sign”*

Davin: Fine. Davin Moreland has some good news, and Davin Moreland has some bad news for Stank. First Stank, Davin Moreland will give you the good news. The good news is, as Davin Moreland is sure Stank is aware, that tonight’s match is not just any match. No, that would not do for a World Champion Davin Moreland vs. Stank match, now would it Stank? So Davin Moreland used Davin Moreland’s “stroke”, and had this match changed to a “Falls Count Anywhere, No DQ” match.

*Stank gives a golf clap and mouths “Let’s Go”*

Davin: Not so fast, Stank. Davin hasn’t given Stank the bad news yet. As Stank and the rest of the Unwashed Masses are aware…

Crowd: BOO~!
Davin: …that Davin Moreland sustained some serious injuries last week entertaining the Unwashed Masses, and trying to destroy Stank. Davin Moreland suffered a concussion and some compressed vertebrae which caused some partial paralysis for Davin Moreland
Crowd: YAY~!

Davin: Oh, that’s nice Unwashed Masses. Unwashed Masses wish injury upon World Champion Davin Moreland? This is why Davin Moreland is here, and the Unwashed Masses are lucky to be able to say *exaggerated Southern Accent* “You want fries with that?”

Crowd: BOO~!

Davin: So Stank, Davin Moreland is clearly not in a position to compete this evening. In fact, as Stank will recall, Davin Moreland promised Davin Moreland’s Captain and entire team from Run DEA that if Davin Moreland wasn’t 100%, Davin Moreland wouldn’t wrestle.

Crowd: BOO~!

*Stank looks over at Davis Hightower, who simply shrugs*

Davin: So, Davin Moreland just wanted to impart that information to Stank. Stank can do what Stank wants with it.

*Stank mouths “Pussy” to Davin and starts to head to the ropes, presumably to the back*

Davin: Woah…hold on there Stank. Davin Moreland isn’t done.

*Stank is clearly pissed off and gets right in Davin’s face*

Davin: So here is Davin Moreland’s bad news for Stank.

*Stank rolls his eyes and turns away again*

Davin: *growls* DAVIN MORELAND IS 100%!

With that, Davin PASTES Stank with a crutch, and he goes flying. Davis Hightower calls for the bell, and WE’RE UNDERWAY! Off comes the Douchebag Shirt, and it appears the apparent Douchebag Boots are just wrasslin’ boots after all. Davin goes to WORK with the crutch, as he just beats the ever-loving shit out of Stank with it; eventually breaking it, and Stank is already bloodied up. Davin drops a couple of elbows before pulling Stank up. Davin DROPKICKS Stank out to the floor. Davin poses, and gets the requisite boos before peering to the outside. Satisfied, Davin hits the far ropes and does a SUICUIDE PLANCHA THROUGH THE ROPES…and EATS CEMENT as Stank is able to roll out of the way. Davin took a nasty bump on the head, and he doesn’t look all there. Stank doesn’t care. He recovers from the early attack, and RUNS over to Davin and PUNTS him in the Rib Cage. He must have broken one or two with that, because Davin didn’t yell quite right. Again, Stank doesn’t care. He simply walks over to Davin and hooks him up…STANKBOMB! The first two were on cement, but the third was on the ramp. Stank takes about 10 steps backward and CHARGES FULL SPEED and STANKONIA 2.0s Davin right on the ramp. Stank grins and covers. Hightower is 1/4th of a second late in starting the count, and it was enough, as Davin was just able to roll the shoulder.

Stank glares at Hightower momentarily, and then picks up Davin again. He GOOZLES him, and CHOKESLAMS Davin onto the ramp. Stank kicks Davin HARD in the ribs again before covering. Again, Davin just does roll his shoulder up. Stank LEG DROPS Davin across the ribs, before pulling him up again; and hitting DA BRAINBUSTAAAHHHHH~!~!~!~! on the ramp, even though is pretty much on the stage at this point. Stank covers, and again Davin, not kicking out, but rolling the shoulder, manages to beat the 3 count. Stank methodically pulls Davin up and hooks him in…he hits a CRUCIFIX POWERBOMB on the stage. Stank is about to cover again, but a crutch comes flying from behind him and hits him in the head. Stank turns slowly, menacingly, and sees Samantha Darling (apparently she expected Stank to fall down) talking shit to him. Stank takes a slow step forward, and this immediately turns Samantha into a professional chickenshit. She keeps mouthing “Sorry” and slowly backing away. Stank smiles and slowly starts to walk toward her. Unfortunately for Stank, he doesn’t see Davin, who full-speed SPEARS Stank’s repaired knee. Stank had no chance to protect himself, and that was dirty as hell. Stank hits the ramp and starts holding his knee. Davin can’t follow up; he’s pretty much done as well. Hightower decides to start a count.

The count gets to 7 before Stank is up first. He’s able to test the knee out, and it appears much of the damage there was psychological. Stank walks over to a still-not-moving Davin and pulls the big man up, and showing great strength PRESS SLAMS Davin into the electronics pit. Because this isn’t another company, and the OOWF doesn’t treat you like you’re retarded; there aren’t any gay sparks or sound effects. However, it WAS about a 20 feet high, and Davin landed awkwardly on speakers and wires and lights and stuff. Stank half-expects Hightower to count, but then realizes what’s at stake, so he tries to climb down into the pit, and does; but looks like he turned his ankle on something as he was landing. Stank signals to Hightower to come into the pit. Davin’s still not moving, and he is just POURING blood from any multitude of spots. Stank carefully makes his way over to Davin, and leans him up against the wall of the pit. He gets behind and LOCKS IN THE SOUTHERN COMFORT!

Stank’s got it cinched in; but he doesn’t dare move because he doesn’t exactly have the most stable footing; one on a speaker and the other foot is on a pile of cable. Regardless, the Southern Comfort seems to be having its desired effect. Although, it was tough to see if Davin was conscious anyway; it was a smart move because it would be tough to pin him here. Hightower is checking in on Davin, who has his eyes closed and just looks rough. Time for the 3-arm-lift-spot. First time falls like a dead fish. Second time, even deader. We’re gonna have a new champ! Hightower gets Davin’s up for the third time; and before it falls, Davin immediately buckles his knees; and Stank violently hits his head on a speaker as he goes flying. Davin really isn’t in a position to do anything; so he leans against the wall and just looks over at Stank. Stank starts to stir, some blood coming from where he hit the speaker. Davin gets to his feet. Stank gets to his feet. Davin jumps and tries to pull himself up and out of the pit. He just does clear the top of the pit before Stank can grab his feet. Davin tries to walk; but his legs give out and he unintentionally Flair Flops right on the cement. Stank pulls himself out of the pit finally, and sees Davin out on the floor. He hustles over and covers. Hightower is still trying to get HIMSELF out of the pit; so he’s very late coming over. Hightower counts 2 before Davin rolls a shoulder.

Stank is clearly frustrated and starts slapping the cement. He knew he was the Champ just then. Stank pulls up Davin, and simply drags him back up to the stage platform. He gets Davin on his shoulders. He goes for a STANK-U, but Davin somehow REVERSES into an IMPALER DDT ON THE PLATFORM! Davin has obviously lost a lot of blood and looks in just TERRIBLE shape. After another moment of rest, he looks at the Jumbotron. Why? Oh no. Davin first crawls, and then eventually limps over to the scaffolding surrounding the Jumbotron. And, yeah, he slowly starts to climb the scaffolding. If he gets up there; it’s about a 20 foot drop to the platform from there. As he’s mid-climb, Stank shakes off the effects of the DDT, and whips his head around looking for Davin. He spots him climbing up the scaffolding, and before he really thinks things out, he goes to chase after him. Stank is grabbing at Davin’s ankles before Davin can get to the top of the scaffold, but eventually they’re both somewhat standing on there at a stalemate. And here comes the punching. Here comes the HAYMAKERS! HOCKEY FIGHT! We’ve got a Hockey Fight (minus the sweater-over-the-head spot) on the top of the scaffold. In the exchange, Stank tattoos Davin on the point of the chin mere nanoseconds before Davin connects to Stank’s temple. Both men are wobbly and out on their feet. The crowd is absolutely silent, looking on in horror and awe at the spectacle.

Stank and Davin are both weaving back and forth on the scaffold; and they’re not punching anymore. Both men appear to be out on their feet – and neither is in a very stable environment. Just then, Davin’s left foot slips, and the big man starts to fall to Earth. As he does however, he manages to fall forward a bit and lock his arms around Stank’s head, and he somehow pushes off with his right foot. You hear a collective gasp from the crowd holding their breath, as Davin has Stank in a REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER as the plummet to the Electronics Pit. A sickening crash is heard with legitimate sparks and smoke. Hightower could only look on in horror as this was happening. He takes it upon himself to rush through a 10-count, and then call for the bell and make repeated DREADED X signs to the back. Paramedics rush out, and the camera pans to Davin and Stank. They’re both covered in wire and speakers, and their bodies are lying in very unnatural positions. Most notably however, we see a sadistic grin on the unconscious Davin’s face.
YOUR DECISION in 19:57 by DOUBLE COUNTOUT…NO CONTEST!

Paramedics (real ones) hurry to the scene, and dig through the rubble to get the performers. Both men are on backboards and in hard neck braces as they’re put on stretchers. This time, neither man acknowledges the crowd – in fact, neither is moving. They get the two up the ramp and rush them to the waiting ambulances. The crowd, which was deathly silent for the last 5 minutes or so, erupts in a standing ovation.

The camera pans to Davin's faces, his eyes are open and he is conscious, but barely. Suddenly the lights go out and we hear sinister laugher.......one, two, Eric's comin' for you, three, four won't have that title no more.....it fades back to sinister laughter and the lights come back on and the paramedics finish wheeling Moreland up the ramp

Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action be sure to check out the OOWF New Years Evil IV from Springfield, New Jersey And don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem Live! December 31st from Springfield, Pennsylvania

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[Fire-Babe]

[OOC: Damn, Firewoman must have Abs of Steel to take all those shots to the gut! ]