[Loki]

devmax said:

loki said:

Go for it! It's like, a rite of passage of something.

Kinda like contracting that VD that makes you want to root for the Browns?

That.... makes no sense whatsoever. Were you dropped on your head a lot as a kid?

[Loki]

Sweet! I just noticed that my warning level is up to 88%! Take THAT, Dev! You're only at 20%!

Edit: AND my karma is at -213! Behold the wrath of Sal!

[National Champion Chris Cole]

Loki, you bastard. You double posted! I'm going to smite you for that!!

[Loki]

Aaaahhhhh! Not the SMITE! However will I live? I swear, I'll never double post again!*




*politicain swear, which means it's null and void right after I say it.

[Loki]

Aaaahhhhh! Not the SMITE! However will I live? I swear, I'll never double post again!*







*politicain swear, which means it's null and void right after I say it.

[Loki]

loki said:

Don't encourage Solly. His wife will have to hunt you down and kill you. Or get you deported back to the shoe factory.

salmonjunkie said:

Oh how I hate you, Loki. :

You're really going to hate me now.


----------------------------------------------------

He was sitting at his government job in CA, trying to stay awake. He hated the job, but it allowed him to surf online. And, really, what more could he ask for? He was getting paid by the US Government to goof off.

Sal stood up and stretched. He did enjoy IMing Mark Foley, but the man was too straight laced for Sal’s tastes. Masturbating into a towel? Please. For Sal, that was the equivalent of a normal guy reaching first base with a chick. Sal liked his internet exchanges to be a lot more risqué. He looked at the clock. Hmmm. Solly should be logging on anytime now. And Solly was always a good scratch for Sal’s itch.

Suddenly, the door burst off its hinges and flew across the room. Time seemed to slow down. Sal could see every detail about the door – the grain of the faux wood, the dent where he had punched it after his request for a 35% raise had been declined, the inspirational kitten poster he had taped to the door - and he had time to appreciate each nuance before time sped back up and the door hit him full on.

Sal went down in a heap. As he was slipping out of consciousness he heard a voice yell “Immigration! FREEZE!”

*********************

Sal blearily opened his eyes. His mind was foggy. He tried to raise his arms, but he heard a clink of metal and realized he couldn’t move. Whu...? he thought fuzzily. He seemed to be encased in chains. Oh, I know what this is… He felt a thrill of excitement that quickly changed to dizziness. It intensified, and his last thoughts before he passed out involved Fabio.

***********************

Bright light stabbed through his closed eyelids, accompanied by a sharp kick to his ribs. He grunted and sat up. He looked around. He seemed to be in a plant of some kind. There were hundreds of people dressed in dirty clothes, chained to desks in front of them. Each seemed to be working feverishly.

Spaced at even intervals along the floor were conveyer belts. They were filled with objects evenly spaced apart. Each stop along the way, one of the chained people would pick an object off the belt, do something to do it and place it back on.

With a dawning horror he looked in front of him. Leather. Laces. A punch. A needle. Thread. Soles.

He thought he had escaped it, all those years ago. But the old saying was true: You can’t escape your past.

He saw a white note attached to one of the soles in front of him. With trembling hands, he opened it up and read:

“I warned you to stay away from Freddy. You didn’t. Enjoy the next 30 years. – Mrs. Freddy”

One of the guards looked at Sal and smiled with an evil, gap toothed grin. Sal was back in the shoe factory.

Sal threw back his head and screamed his agony to the flickering fluorescent lights -


COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNN[/color] – verse!

[salmonjunkie]

I knew never to trust that dirty Jew Solly.


OOOH I hate you, Loki.

[Loki]

Come on, admit it. You got a chuckle out of the Khan-verse line.

[The Jewish Cunthead]

COOOON-verse? Well done, sir ;D

[salmonjunkie]

BOOOOOO-urns!