[The Jewish Cunthead]

Employer: You wanna quit? Then quit! Leave! Get outta here! I didn't want you in the first place. You have wasted, wasted our time, sir. This is a complete bust, the whole afternoon. Solly.... Solly, where are you going? I want you to take him with you, Solly. Take him with you. He is not a professional, I only work with professionals. You cost us thousands because you can't read!

[Pun]

"You're gunna be a greasy lazy-eyed Anglo tank!"

[The Jewish Cunthead]

Mikey: You post great but I'm a great poster.

[Mikey]

Moose: Ya need some help?
Rocky: Nah... this ain't no hot dog eating contest.

[The Jewish Cunthead]

Moose: I know we can't be born again, but we have to change sometime.

Mikey: I don't want to change! I like who I am!

[Pun]

Solly:Why do you have to wear that stinkin' Phillies jersey?
Moose:It brings me luck, you know?
Solly:Brings you luck?!. I'll tell you what it brings - it brings flies!

[The Jewish Cunthead]

Solly: (YELLS)
Moose: I thought you said be cool.
Mikey: That WAS cool!

[Pun]

Mikey: Can he swim?
Solly: Are you kidding? With a name like Moose?

[The Jewish Cunthead]

Interviewer: What's your prediction for your paper?
Moose: Prediction?
Interviewer: Yes, prediction.
Moose: FAIL.

[BTR]

Jul 11, 2008 15:13:30 GMT -5 Mikey said:

Moose: I see none of them out there.
Solly: Hit the one in the midd...ah, fuck it.

[Pun]

Damn, man! What the hell are you doing?! This professor will fail your ass! You thought I was tough? This chump will expel you!

[Mikey]

"Hey Solly! Hey Solly! I betcha stay up every night dreamin of a man. Later on tonight, bring your pretty self over to my apartment, and I'll show ya a real man."

[Pun]

This guy is a wrecking machine, and he's hungry. Hell you ain't been hungry since you....oh wait.

[Jack Quinn]

I am not sure whether I should exalt you jerks, or smite you jerks. I know, instead I will just get my revenge!

Great job btw!

[Mikey]

Moose: How do you spell Del Rio?
Gazzo: Get a dictionary, Moose.
Driver: And then cite that son of a bitch.

[The Jewish Cunthead]

Promoter: Egge's seen you study. He likes you. He wants to fail you.

[Pun]

You can't pass, Moose. This guy will fail ya to death.

[The Jewish Cunthead]

EMU: See you next year. Thank God.

[Mikey]

Mikey: How much you think he eats?
Solly: About 202 pounds.



** note, that's what the scale actually read last night in my bathroom

[The Jewish Cunthead]

If he fails, he fails.

[Mikey]

Reporter: Got anything derogatory to say about Solly?
Moose: Derogatory....? Yeah, he's great.

[Pun]

It aint bout how many sources you have...its bout how well you cite them. Its bout how much you cite and keep moving on.

[The Jewish Cunthead]

Moose: When did you get so tough?
Flea: I live with a non-citer.

[The Jewish Cunthead]

It doesn't matter how this looks to other people. If this is something you gotta do, then you do it. Citers cite.

[The Jewish Cunthead]

To get this diploma, you need speed - you don't have it. And your knees can't take the pounding, so hard running is out. And you got arthritis in your neck, and you've got calcium deposits on most of your joints, so sparring is out.