MNF 61/Male Bag 44
Mar 5, 2013 21:47:47 GMT -5
Post by Andy on Mar 5, 2013 21:47:47 GMT -5
Check out Monday Night Flaw 61 and Male Bag 44 on iTunes, stitcher or www.flawedcast.net/mondaynightflaw then get your stupid ass back here and VOTE!!!
Cliff Snotes
Please see Attached Document
Chris: LET’S GO STUART Andy: STUART SUCKS!
Chris: LET’S GO STUART Andy: STUART SUCKS!
Chris: LET’S GO STUART Andy: STUART SUCKS!
welcome
except for you stuart little you are not welcome here you think you are so great right stuart little you get special treatment stuart little you get to stay at the top of the card stuart little you are the favorite of andy and chris you think you are oh so special with all your wins you flaunt all your belts and take comfort in hanging them in your room you think you are so cool with your twenty wins yet you whine about not having twentyone wins we have had enough of stuart little we are all sick of your act we do not think you are special we do not believe in your spooky powers that can control the bagpipes you are just a man you are not a mystical devilish immortal highlander we are tired of you stuart little we are not scared of you stuart little this is the beginning of the end of stuart little this is not a warning this is not a threat this is a statement the cage has been unlocked the pack of wild dogs are unleashed the pack of wild dogs are unchained the pack of wild dogs are on their way we are coming for you stuart little your shaming is upon us your breaking is here your end is nigh it shall happen it shall happen and there is nothing that will change what has already been set in motion because i know your secret i know your secret and it has already been shared and now everyone else knows your secret and everyone is going to use your secret to ruin you we are all looking forward to next week and you will remember
i am the one who opened the cage
i am
Stu Little
Remember, you asked for this.
Hey guys!
Cam, a pussy magnet? Finally, a BELIEVABLE gimmick around here.
Remember he was up for the role of a legendary lover?
But the BBC said "hey, we're making a historical drama, not a documentary!" and recast him with David Tennant.
Things looked more hopeful when he went to portray a more fictional ladies man
But that fell through when he was unsatisfied with the amount of pussy on call on the set at all times, so he pulled out...of the role. Not a pussy. It's believed by some doctors if he goes 2 minutes without banging something, he'll die due to withdrawl. That's how mad about pussy he is.
With acting off the table, he turned to writing, and was much more successfull
Cam is so prolific at the fuckery, than I wonder, is there a chance that any of his bastard offspring could e-mail in next week, perhaps? A slim chance I know, but that would interesting, wouldn't it?
But enough on that. Cam may have all the women, but he doesn't have 20 World Championships under his belt. He doesn't even have ONE! That's what happens when barely any women vote for this thing and all the men's girlfriends cheated on them with you. You make no friends that way, bub. I suppose I should give some thanks to the voters for being so easily amused by my repetitive efforts, to Andy for being an uncaring a-hole when I brought up the topic of maybe taking a break and insisting I keep at it, and to Chris for having a Scottish humour fetish that makes him keep making up scottish magazine titles and fictional scottish people. Expect Chuck Haggis: The Podcast...NEVER. And special thanks to me, because if I never raised the bar so much in the first place, no one else would have gotten "better" and forced me to be even more great. So yay me, and here's to hitting 100 World Championships by the end of the year. Nothing's gonna stop me! Nothing! Later, fuckos.
*gets into a limo, which promptly explodes*
Austin Sanders
I just saw the most disturbing thing JB King has ever photoshoped. I think
I'm gonna need another week to recover from this.
Fuck me hard
Austin
Bartow Florida
Raw is What?
Hey guys,
My two losses last week were utterly devastating, as you bastards clearly
didn't appreciate the sacrifices I made sacrificing my own tag team partner
so you all wouldn't be forced to know what a T-Rex penis feels like. So I
took some time off, climbed the Himalayas, and trained with the ghost of
Chris Candido on top of the mountain for three days! (By train, I mean we
did lots of coke off of Tammy Sytch's cooter, Chris ODed and is now the
ghost of the ghost of Chris Candido).
In any case, let me respond to all of the varied insults hurled my way last
week that unfortunately I was not able to preemptively respond to: I am
younger, better looking, and live in a lovelier place than almost all of
you. I am Bartow Florida. Listen to my podcast: The NBA Hole. And suck a
fat dick. BAM!
Yep, that heel turn feels real good right about now.
In any case, since Stu is clearly Cena'ing Andy's McMahon to get all of
these titles (if you catch my drift...) I'll keep it simple this week with
some light wrestling talk:
LAST WEEK'S RAW WAS FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!!!
This was the first RAW I've seen yet that has reminded me about how I felt
watching wrestling as a kid, back when it was an adult form of
entertainment and almost appealed to kids more because of it. I thought
even the mediocre matches in between were of a higher quality than the
usual filler. Also, remember, even at its peak RAW always needed at least
one filler match if not more, which is especially the case now with three
hours to fill. But the bookend segments were amazing, I didn't care about
Brock at Wrestlemania until Triple H made me care about him. He worked that
brawl so well. And even if the blood was real, I hope they learn from the
reaction to start bringing that stuff back. I hope this quality of show
won't disappear after Wrestlemania, but I feel we will at least get it
until then.
In summary, WWE is on the upswing, and all of you can suck a fat dino dick.
Sincerely,
Bart Florida
Helen Smart
A Few Updates
Special Alert Inside! The Shorts Are Out! ACT NOW!
Date: Mon, Mar 4th
Name: GOLD AND GEMSTONE MINING, INC.
Symbol traded: G_G_S_M
Buy at: $.017
3-Day Target: 0.25
Did You See Today`s News? Details Inside! Important Update!
Ziggy Blumenthal
Another question
Hello Andy and Chris,
If the 2 of you were gay, would you or would you not fuck your co-host, and
what is the reason behind your answer?
Thank you for listening,
-Ziggy
ps. The biggest joke in this email is that I said "if".
Fags.
--
Ziggy Blumenthal
Fake McCoy Comics
@ziggyfakemccoy
www.fakemmcoy.com
www.secretjew.com
Cam Gullett
Did anyone say, "Cam eats more pussy than cervical cancer" yet?
Anyway, back to my plate of ethnically diverse pussy. I even have a side
order of midget pussy as an anytizer. NomNomNomNomNomNom
Cam Gullett
Johnny Bellfield
(plays piano) Saturday! Saturday! Saaaaaturday! Saturday! Saturday! Saturday Night's Alright~
Evening Bros!
It’s here! TONIGHT! Bigger than Adam Dan’s hospital bills! Badder than
Chris Alt's vocal range! Hotter than Chris Dorner’s log cabin! It’s SHOTGUN
SATURDAY NIIGHHHTTTTTT!
Congrats to Andy and Chris for winning the Male Bag contest! That 40 minute
email you guys cooked up was just awesome. Wait, you guys didn’t win? Sad
face. I wish I could have voted for that instead of the rapping. And
congrats to me for winning the IC title! Add that to my accolades Andy!
I’ve beat the shit out of a woman! Give ME a Grammy bitches! #Team Jbreezy
That being said, I must now work on getting the World title one last time.
The road the Male Bagamania begins now! (points to Male Bag sign hanging
from the ceiling).
Cam loves pussy? Sure, why not? I love bits. I guess that totally explains
my 2 broken fingers. I praise you Cam. What a fool I was to think my feeble
hands were more than enough to satisfy the death snatch also known as
Demko’s dick garage. Thankfully, Cam came right in there with his massive
baby arm of a cock to save the day. Consider my hand collateral damage.
Because if you’re going to make an omelet (or orgasm) you’re going to have
to break a few eggs! By the way, I was making a picture this week to help
re-enact EXACTLY what happened between Cam, Demko’s wife and myself.
However, I could not find a ‘sample’ picture to go by on the internet for
this particular situation. Nothing. Not even “I” could find a DP pic of
this description. So I winged it. And it’s probably still not suitable for
work. So whatever, suck it Stu.
qkme.me/3t7nnp
The old Cam would have simply gotten another gay joke. I probably would
have said something along the lines of “Cam has downed more men than an
All-Star defensive tackle.” But no, now we get this reverse psychology
gimmick. Awesome….wait. Andy, can we still mock for being a ginger? Can I
still ream him for looking like a fat faced Matt Morgan with downs? At
least Cam is respectful enough to Matt Morgan by keeping his old
“stuttering” gimmick. Still love you Cam aka Poochie. And I hope you live
up to the Poochie gimmick to its end. And by that, I mean I pray to God you
spontaneously float into space and fucking die.
Hey Austin Sanders! Look what I made! Enjoy you racist, cracker ass cracker.
i1003.photobucket.com/albums/af159/playonjb/ptp_zps003cb91c.png
So I guess Brock and Triple H is a thing again. Nice blade job job Brock.
Cue Mark Henry’s theme, because Brock got his wig spit. By the way, since
when the hell did Triple H piss out of his ass?
i2.photobucket.com/albums/y28/drunkmoth/9e550b57-4adf-4cff-ac3a-1654d26aa306_zps4839bc6b.jpg
Talk about taking the piss out of your build, AMIRTIE! I’m beginning to
think Triple H took the Billy Madison joke too seriously. Consider him
Miles Davis! You see Chris…something something something peeing in your
pants is cool.
Maybe now Hunter Hearst Hermaphrodite should change his lyrics to his theme.
It’s all about the stain, and how he sprayed it.
It’s all about control, and can he contain it.
It’s all about the toilet, and if he can make it
It’s all about his dick, and if he will shake it.
And scene.
Good Night guys.
Johnny
P.S. The BooBoo recap would have made this email far too long. So I can
send it in next next male bag or this week’s MNF if you’d like. Also, I
don’t sound like Snaggle-Puss Andy. ~Heavens to Murgatroyd~!
Cliff Snotes
Please see Attached Document
Chris: LET’S GO STUART Andy: STUART SUCKS!
Chris: LET’S GO STUART Andy: STUART SUCKS!
Chris: LET’S GO STUART Andy: STUART SUCKS!
welcome
except for you stuart little you are not welcome here you think you are so great right stuart little you get special treatment stuart little you get to stay at the top of the card stuart little you are the favorite of andy and chris you think you are oh so special with all your wins you flaunt all your belts and take comfort in hanging them in your room you think you are so cool with your twenty wins yet you whine about not having twentyone wins we have had enough of stuart little we are all sick of your act we do not think you are special we do not believe in your spooky powers that can control the bagpipes you are just a man you are not a mystical devilish immortal highlander we are tired of you stuart little we are not scared of you stuart little this is the beginning of the end of stuart little this is not a warning this is not a threat this is a statement the cage has been unlocked the pack of wild dogs are unleashed the pack of wild dogs are unchained the pack of wild dogs are on their way we are coming for you stuart little your shaming is upon us your breaking is here your end is nigh it shall happen it shall happen and there is nothing that will change what has already been set in motion because i know your secret i know your secret and it has already been shared and now everyone else knows your secret and everyone is going to use your secret to ruin you we are all looking forward to next week and you will remember
i am the one who opened the cage
i am
Stu Little
Remember, you asked for this.
Hey guys!
Cam, a pussy magnet? Finally, a BELIEVABLE gimmick around here.
Remember he was up for the role of a legendary lover?
But the BBC said "hey, we're making a historical drama, not a documentary!" and recast him with David Tennant.
Things looked more hopeful when he went to portray a more fictional ladies man
But that fell through when he was unsatisfied with the amount of pussy on call on the set at all times, so he pulled out...of the role. Not a pussy. It's believed by some doctors if he goes 2 minutes without banging something, he'll die due to withdrawl. That's how mad about pussy he is.
With acting off the table, he turned to writing, and was much more successfull
Cam is so prolific at the fuckery, than I wonder, is there a chance that any of his bastard offspring could e-mail in next week, perhaps? A slim chance I know, but that would interesting, wouldn't it?
But enough on that. Cam may have all the women, but he doesn't have 20 World Championships under his belt. He doesn't even have ONE! That's what happens when barely any women vote for this thing and all the men's girlfriends cheated on them with you. You make no friends that way, bub. I suppose I should give some thanks to the voters for being so easily amused by my repetitive efforts, to Andy for being an uncaring a-hole when I brought up the topic of maybe taking a break and insisting I keep at it, and to Chris for having a Scottish humour fetish that makes him keep making up scottish magazine titles and fictional scottish people. Expect Chuck Haggis: The Podcast...NEVER. And special thanks to me, because if I never raised the bar so much in the first place, no one else would have gotten "better" and forced me to be even more great. So yay me, and here's to hitting 100 World Championships by the end of the year. Nothing's gonna stop me! Nothing! Later, fuckos.
*gets into a limo, which promptly explodes*
Austin Sanders
I just saw the most disturbing thing JB King has ever photoshoped. I think
I'm gonna need another week to recover from this.
Fuck me hard
Austin
Bartow Florida
Raw is What?
Hey guys,
My two losses last week were utterly devastating, as you bastards clearly
didn't appreciate the sacrifices I made sacrificing my own tag team partner
so you all wouldn't be forced to know what a T-Rex penis feels like. So I
took some time off, climbed the Himalayas, and trained with the ghost of
Chris Candido on top of the mountain for three days! (By train, I mean we
did lots of coke off of Tammy Sytch's cooter, Chris ODed and is now the
ghost of the ghost of Chris Candido).
In any case, let me respond to all of the varied insults hurled my way last
week that unfortunately I was not able to preemptively respond to: I am
younger, better looking, and live in a lovelier place than almost all of
you. I am Bartow Florida. Listen to my podcast: The NBA Hole. And suck a
fat dick. BAM!
Yep, that heel turn feels real good right about now.
In any case, since Stu is clearly Cena'ing Andy's McMahon to get all of
these titles (if you catch my drift...) I'll keep it simple this week with
some light wrestling talk:
LAST WEEK'S RAW WAS FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!!!
This was the first RAW I've seen yet that has reminded me about how I felt
watching wrestling as a kid, back when it was an adult form of
entertainment and almost appealed to kids more because of it. I thought
even the mediocre matches in between were of a higher quality than the
usual filler. Also, remember, even at its peak RAW always needed at least
one filler match if not more, which is especially the case now with three
hours to fill. But the bookend segments were amazing, I didn't care about
Brock at Wrestlemania until Triple H made me care about him. He worked that
brawl so well. And even if the blood was real, I hope they learn from the
reaction to start bringing that stuff back. I hope this quality of show
won't disappear after Wrestlemania, but I feel we will at least get it
until then.
In summary, WWE is on the upswing, and all of you can suck a fat dino dick.
Sincerely,
Bart Florida
Helen Smart
A Few Updates
Special Alert Inside! The Shorts Are Out! ACT NOW!
Date: Mon, Mar 4th
Name: GOLD AND GEMSTONE MINING, INC.
Symbol traded: G_G_S_M
Buy at: $.017
3-Day Target: 0.25
Did You See Today`s News? Details Inside! Important Update!
Ziggy Blumenthal
Another question
Hello Andy and Chris,
If the 2 of you were gay, would you or would you not fuck your co-host, and
what is the reason behind your answer?
Thank you for listening,
-Ziggy
ps. The biggest joke in this email is that I said "if".
Fags.
--
Ziggy Blumenthal
Fake McCoy Comics
@ziggyfakemccoy
www.fakemmcoy.com
www.secretjew.com
Cam Gullett
Did anyone say, "Cam eats more pussy than cervical cancer" yet?
Anyway, back to my plate of ethnically diverse pussy. I even have a side
order of midget pussy as an anytizer. NomNomNomNomNomNom
Cam Gullett
Johnny Bellfield
(plays piano) Saturday! Saturday! Saaaaaturday! Saturday! Saturday! Saturday Night's Alright~
Evening Bros!
It’s here! TONIGHT! Bigger than Adam Dan’s hospital bills! Badder than
Chris Alt's vocal range! Hotter than Chris Dorner’s log cabin! It’s SHOTGUN
SATURDAY NIIGHHHTTTTTT!
Congrats to Andy and Chris for winning the Male Bag contest! That 40 minute
email you guys cooked up was just awesome. Wait, you guys didn’t win? Sad
face. I wish I could have voted for that instead of the rapping. And
congrats to me for winning the IC title! Add that to my accolades Andy!
I’ve beat the shit out of a woman! Give ME a Grammy bitches! #Team Jbreezy
That being said, I must now work on getting the World title one last time.
The road the Male Bagamania begins now! (points to Male Bag sign hanging
from the ceiling).
Cam loves pussy? Sure, why not? I love bits. I guess that totally explains
my 2 broken fingers. I praise you Cam. What a fool I was to think my feeble
hands were more than enough to satisfy the death snatch also known as
Demko’s dick garage. Thankfully, Cam came right in there with his massive
baby arm of a cock to save the day. Consider my hand collateral damage.
Because if you’re going to make an omelet (or orgasm) you’re going to have
to break a few eggs! By the way, I was making a picture this week to help
re-enact EXACTLY what happened between Cam, Demko’s wife and myself.
However, I could not find a ‘sample’ picture to go by on the internet for
this particular situation. Nothing. Not even “I” could find a DP pic of
this description. So I winged it. And it’s probably still not suitable for
work. So whatever, suck it Stu.
qkme.me/3t7nnp
The old Cam would have simply gotten another gay joke. I probably would
have said something along the lines of “Cam has downed more men than an
All-Star defensive tackle.” But no, now we get this reverse psychology
gimmick. Awesome….wait. Andy, can we still mock for being a ginger? Can I
still ream him for looking like a fat faced Matt Morgan with downs? At
least Cam is respectful enough to Matt Morgan by keeping his old
“stuttering” gimmick. Still love you Cam aka Poochie. And I hope you live
up to the Poochie gimmick to its end. And by that, I mean I pray to God you
spontaneously float into space and fucking die.
Hey Austin Sanders! Look what I made! Enjoy you racist, cracker ass cracker.
i1003.photobucket.com/albums/af159/playonjb/ptp_zps003cb91c.png
So I guess Brock and Triple H is a thing again. Nice blade job job Brock.
Cue Mark Henry’s theme, because Brock got his wig spit. By the way, since
when the hell did Triple H piss out of his ass?
i2.photobucket.com/albums/y28/drunkmoth/9e550b57-4adf-4cff-ac3a-1654d26aa306_zps4839bc6b.jpg
Talk about taking the piss out of your build, AMIRTIE! I’m beginning to
think Triple H took the Billy Madison joke too seriously. Consider him
Miles Davis! You see Chris…something something something peeing in your
pants is cool.
Maybe now Hunter Hearst Hermaphrodite should change his lyrics to his theme.
It’s all about the stain, and how he sprayed it.
It’s all about control, and can he contain it.
It’s all about the toilet, and if he can make it
It’s all about his dick, and if he will shake it.
And scene.
Good Night guys.
Johnny
P.S. The BooBoo recap would have made this email far too long. So I can
send it in next next male bag or this week’s MNF if you’d like. Also, I
don’t sound like Snaggle-Puss Andy. ~Heavens to Murgatroyd~!