[Fire-Babe]

Haven't heard anything from Rick on the recap front (not surprised, either) so I'll keep this up until that's back, and even afterwards if there's interest.

Your preview courtesy of WWE writer monkeys....

Preview: Paving the way to Backlash
April 22, 2008

Just 24 hours after ECW Champion Kane found himself in opposition to Edge in a massive Eight-Man Tag Match on Raw, the Big Red Monster will appear as a guest on the Rated-R Superstar's talk segment, The Cutting Edge. Last night, the champion traded blows and was even pinned by the Ultimate Opportunist in one of Edge's signature opportunistic moments. Will Kane bring a fiery wrath to ECW on Sci Fi tonight? More importantly, will the Rated-R Superstar's "familia" - Kane's Backlash challenger, Chavo Guerrero - be watching?

With Backlash less than two weeks away, Kane has begun building momentum, thanks in part to some help from a fellow champion – and family member. The Brothers of Destruction, Kane & World Heavyweight Champion Undertaker, were victorious over The Miz & John Morrison on the last ECW on Sci Fi, demolishing the WWE Tag Team Champions.

But when Kane defends the ECW title against Chavo Guerrero at Backlash, the Big Red Machine won’t have his brother with him in the ring. How will Kane fare in the days leading to Backlash? How will Guerrero enlist the help of his new bodyguard, Bam Neely, as he tries to win back ECW gold?

Kofi Kingston’s winning streak also continued last Tuesday night, as he led his team of CM Punk, Jimmy Wang Yang & Shannon Moore to victory in an Eight-Man Tag Team Match against Deuce, Domino, Shelton Benjamin & Elijah Burke. The Jamaican Superstar has been blazing a path through every challenger he meets; who will step up to challenge Kingston next? Will anyone be able to stop the Jamaican sensation?

In other ECW action, Mike Knox continued his winning ways in London. Under ECW General Manager Armando Estrada’s watchful eye, Knox was victorious over Colin Delaney, who was once again fighting for a WWE contract. The youngster wasn’t able to enlist the aid of ECW Original Tommy Dreamer this week, as his bad luck continues. Will Delaney’s fortune eventually turn around? Will he ever earn a WWE contract?

Find out the answers to these questions and more on this week's ECW on Sci Fi, tonight at 10/9 CT.

[Fire-Babe]

Kinda live from Greensboro.

Match 1: Kelly Kelly/Tommy Dreamer v. Layla/Mike Knox, Mixed Tag Team match

Mixed tag team match, so we start with Kelly and Layla. They are terrible, so Knox and Dreamer come in. Very brawly to start. Dreamer bulldogs Knox, and then the women are back in. Kelly does get an okay dropkick, then goes up top. She attempts a cross body of the top rope. Kelly finishes with a Fam-ass-er, and gets the pin. Winners Kelly Kelly/Tommy Dreamer

While they are celebrating, Knox comes in and attacks Dreamer. Because we can't have Dreamer in a match and not have him end up unconscious on the mat.

Match 2: John Morrison v. Jimmy Wang Yang

Miz comes down with him and heads for the announce table. Shannon Moore comes down with Yang.

The camera keeps cutting back to Miz...so following the actual MATCH is a bit hard. Yang is in control early, clotheslining Morrison out of the ring. He gets back in, and Yang does a kind of flying head scissors, but it ends up hurting Yang's knee more than it hurts Morrison. Morrison goes to work on the knee. Morrison counters but keeps selling the leg. Yang monkey flips Morrison to the center and gets a 2 count. Yang moonsaults of the turnbuckle and pins Morrison for three. Winner: Jimmy Wang Yang.

Best line ever

Miz: he knows exactly what he's doing. He's baiting Jimmy Wang Wang
Tazz: what?
Miz: Hey, Adamle's allowed to mess up lines...

HA! Miz and Morrison argue after the match.

Match 3: Kofi Kingston v. Shelton Benjamin

Before the match, Kofi sucks up to Shelton, but Shelton is not having it, saying that Kofi's unbeaten streak ends tonight.

Okay, this match has potential. Let's see. Shelton gets Kofi down quickly, and then Kofi kips up and hits a flying drop kick. Shelton gets him in a headlock. Shelton also has a new move a shoulder breaker, which looked nice. Shelton applies a rest hold. It's all Shelton right now. Kofi gets out, and bounces of the ropes to a cross body for a 2 count. Shelton recovers his offense. Shelton jumps of the turnbuckle, right into Kofi's latest flying drop kick. Not for long, as Shelton locks an armbar, and continues his Orton-inspired offense. Finally Kofi is able to get out of it, and monkey flips Shelton. But, Shelton sticks the landing, and goes back on offense. He goes for the kick, but Kofi ducks it and hits an enziguiri. He rolls Shelton up for the pin and the win. Winner: Kofi Kingston.

Match 4: Mark Henry v. Nunzio

Apparently stupid rematch of stupid Clinton/Obama crap from last night is too important, because that overshadowed the actual ring entrances or match announcement. A total squash. Winner: Mark Henry

Finally, we get to The Cutting Edge. Edge comes out with his Minions, and introduces Your Current ECW Champion, KANE!

Edge basically recaps Kane's entire life for the past 2-3 years, for those just now tuning in. Eventually Edge gets to the point, that he wants the titles held by the Brothers of Destruction. Kane counters that Edge will be lucky if he has a family left. In fact, maybe Vickie would be the only one left... all by herself. But he promises he and Taker will take very good care of her.

Edge attacks, but Kane is too fast. The Guerreros are joined by an actual Guerrero, Chavo, and "Bam." Chavo and Edge place Kane's into position, and Chavo takes FOREVER setting up the concerto on Kane's knee. The Guerreros high five each other out of the ring, but Chavo and Bam stay behind. Bam holds down the leg and Chavo works the knee over with the chair. Hit Chavo's music and Team Guerrero finishes their retreat. Undertaker is no where to be seen?

[Demko]

post-show snarky comment placeholder

EDIT: Let's see... snarky... Kofi Kingston WON against Shelton Benjamin? Well... I guess we're sacrificing all the lambs to the 'altar of Kingston'...

[National Champion Chris Cole]

(Wise Ass remark towards TheDemko placeholder)

If Shelton hasn't gotten over by now what makes you think he is worth protecting? Kofi has 10 times the charisma of Shelton and might become a star.

[Demko]

(Response and counter-argument to CC placeholder.)

Shelton has shown that he has charisma. Kofi has only shown that he's 'jumpy'. Kofi hasn't had a chance to showcase himself, charisma or otherwise. So why should he be going over people like Shelton without at least some sort of story buildup?

[National Champion Chris Cole]

(Placeholder for calling The Demko a complete retard.)

You just like to complain don't you. If you don't like it then don't watch it. Are you a complete retard or something?

(Has the joke run its course or does it have a bit more legs?)

[Tommy]

Mike Adamle sucks.
ECW was not worth watching over election coverage.

[DevSop]

Placeholder for Kofi fucking Kingston leading his team? A team with Money in the Bank CM Punk?

[Tommy]

Kofi Kingston is very "jumpy"

[Demko]

'Why the fuck did I ever start this?' comment placeholder

I started this, because it actually turned out to be relatively amusing. But we took an awfully long way to get there. :-P

[National Champion Chris Cole]

This joke will rule all if we actually go back and edit in all these comments tomorrow.

[Demko]

I will if you will! :-D

[jetskid48]

LOL...I expect some promised funny snarkyness after all this buildup, tomorrow.

[Demko]

Re-updated my first comment... but it didn't bump the thread, sadly.

[Batman]

I watched ECW for the first couple of weeks of the 12-Pack, and quickly realized that there was never anything on this show that would effect my ballot. And I wasn't enjoying watching it.

Is the Shelton match this week good enough to be an exception?

[Fire-Babe]

Shelton/Kofi match was okay. All the matches seemed ridiculously short for some reason. I thought it was to give more time to the Main Event of a pseudo-talk show, but that wasn't even all that great. In fact I dozed off part way through it and had to rewind it to post the synopsis.

Morrison/Yang was good too, and not just because of Miz's slam on Adamle. (And not just because of Morrison's physique either...)

I gotta say, I generally tune out the announcers unless I don't know the name of a move and have to listen to hear what they're calling it, so Adamle's quality or lack thereof really hasn't made an impact on me.

[DevSop]

Has the lack of quality wrestling and/or entertainment made an impact...(TNA Impact - Thursdays at 9 on Spike TV) on ya Fire? I really am curious how you drew the short straw to recap the most mind-numbingly pointless wrestling show since Thunder.

[bdbdbd]

She could be reviewing Heat.

[jetskid48]

Now that Styles is gone, there's pretty much only one guy left who I'd be sad to be out of a job if ECW closed its doors. No, not Tony Chimel. Time to move Tazz back with Cole on Smackdown where he belongs, push Coach back to Raw to replace Regal as the little bitch GM so Regal can wrestle, then end this shit.

No matter how entertaining any of the little stuff like Morrison/Miz and Kofi can be, they'd be much better taking up those diva segments and the thousandth recap of Raw on Smackdown instead.

[Fire-Babe]

Apr 23, 2008 10:44:07 GMT -5 DevSop said:

Has the lack of quality wrestling and/or entertainment made an impact...(TNA Impact - Thursdays at 9 on Spike TV) on ya Fire? I really am curious how you drew the short straw to recap the most mind-numbingly pointless wrestling show since Thunder.

Yeah, I know that's just you being bitchy...but you get a serious answer as punishment.

I volunteered to do ECW OOver there because it'd been a while since I'd done recaps (I did soap recaps for Usenet Way Back When), and it was always fun. ECW only lasts an hour and I figured I could contribute that much time a week. And, at the time, ECW wasn't so terrible, with at least 2 enjoyable matches a night. Plus, since like eight people watch it, if I screwed anything up, no one would care...except Skids, of course.

Hopefully, this latest slam into the boards is temporary, and ECW can go back to being moderately enjoyable.

Now, get back to the dungeon basement. You forgot to ask if you could speak.

[jetskid48]

Apr 29, 2008 7:05:55 GMT -5 Fire-Babe said:

Plus, since like eight people watch it, if I screwed anything up, no one would care...except Skids, of course.

You assume that I actually read your recaps.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOH SLAM!

[Fire-Babe]

Apr 29, 2008 13:25:23 GMT -5 jetskid48 said:

You assume that I actually read your recaps.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOH SLAM!

If I wanted, I'd have Lucky go back and count the replies. Not that that means you read them, of course.

Damn, now I'll have to stay up late tonight thinking of ways to get Skids to read my writings.......