[blownspot]

<Alex Darling walks into the back room of the Destroyitarium.>

Alex - You read to go sis?

Lexi - Yes we're finished, here?

<Alexis looks at Stank who is still looking at the photo.>

Stank - Uh... yeah... we're done. Thanks Alexis.

Lexi - Everyone can thank me when I get back.

Alex - Hey Stank, you catch Chris Cole's promo?

Stank - No. What did he say?

Alex - He's challenging you to a match.

Stank - No shit? I guess I'll go check that out on my DVR.

<Stank and the Darlings walk out the back room>

<fade>

[Fire-Babe]

The Darling twins enter the RunDEA Suites by Aquafina where Firewoman has been waiting.

FW: How’d the meeting go?

LD: Excellent. You ready?

AD: What’s going on?

FW: Uh…nothing….

LD: Nothing…

AD: Please…aren’t we over all this by now?

Alexis and Firewoman look at their shoes for a bit, then at each other.

FW: We were just going out. That’s all. Since her flight leaves tomorrow…I guess, if you wanted to go along….

AD: [laughs] Well, that sounded almost sincere. No, you go have fun. I’ll see you later, Lexie, and yes, I know…I won’t wait up.

Alexander leaves.

FW: So where were you thinking? I found this place—

LD: Wait. Before we go, just promise –

FW: Yes, I’ll watch Alex’s back. I think after last week—

LD: No no, not that. I know you will. Promise you won’t –

FW: [she laughs] I won’t take Captain Phantastic and Luscious to any more strip clubs.

LD: Dammit, I’m trying to be serious! [Firewoman stops laughing and gets serious]. Don’t let Bennett’s mind games get to you. I know you can handle the physical side of things… but he’s playing a psychological battle too. Don’t let him or Moose or any of the other ones cause you to lose your focus and do something stupid.

FW: You’re sounding like Chris now…

LD: That’s because we are both right. So…promise? I won’t be here, and Lucky can only do so much.

FW: Fine, whatever. Can we go now?

LD: No.

FW: Now what?

LD: I think … I think we should stay in……

FW: …. smiles

LD: …. smiles

FW: … That is a fantastic idea.

The two women leave the suites, slamming the door on the Ninja Cam.

[Concrete TG]

(Concrete is seated in meditation in the courtyard of the Myaanmar Akikai New Organization dojo. His eyes slowly open as quiet footsteps approach from off-camera)

??-> It's been a long time, Takaken.

CTG: (Stands and bows) but the paths of the world are wound around it like string- they cross twice easily, and many times more as you change paths.

(The shot widens to reveal Blackdragon with a very proud smile on his face. He's dressed in a solid black uniform similar to that of the dojo's)

BD: So what brings you to this side of the world? I thought WWE was only going to China or Japan if they came this way again.

CTG: uh, yeah, about that.... I'm back with the OOWF.

BD: That was fast. So how are things with the company.

CTG: Not well, I'm afraid. The company is split under Rick and another man trying to run the company - a man named LJ Bennett

BD: so you need allies

CTG: this is a war, not an InVasion.

BD: (nods) I need a moment to tell the Chief instructor and we'll go.

CTG: (faint smile) It'll be good, working together again, Dragon.

BD: (nods and walks back inside)

[iamdoug]

The Scene comes up on a hotel lobby where we see Justin Sane ~walking~. In one hand is the OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Championship, in the other is his official RUN DEA Membership card. Justin has a huge smile on his face as he enters the hotel computer office.

JS: Man I can't wait to e-mail PHIL and tell him about my good luck.

As Justin goes to sit, the chair slides out from under him, and he hits his head against the desk. Justin slides to the floor, with the computer Keyboard landing on his chest. An OOWF ref slide in and makes the 3 count.

Your winner and new OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Champion, A computer keyboard.

Suddenly the mysterious man known only as Karmic slides in bodyslams the keyboard, and makes the cover. The ref counts the 3.

Your Winner and new OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Champion, Karmic.

As Karmic celebrates, Justin Sane's heterosexual lifemate the man known as iamdoug runs in with a chair. He plasters Karmic and makes the cover for 3.

Your winner and new OOWF DDT Iron Man Champion, iamdoug

iamdoug: I Can be having a belt, blarghh! (iamdoug quickly taps to the English language)

Your winner and new OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Champion, the English language.

In a fit of rage, iamdoug slams Justin Sane onto the English Language, the ref quickly counts the 3.

Your Winner and new OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Champion, Justin Sane.

Suddenly Kayfabee runs in looking pissed. She grabs iamdoug, Karmic, the keyboard, and the English language, and drags them out of the room. Justin Slowly gets to his feet.

JS: Man Phantos was right, the Internet is a dangerous place.

(fade to black)

[Attitude Adjuster]

Attitude Adjuster is standing in front of an OOWF banner, ready to cut an Old School promo.

SFJ #41: Attitude Adjuster, you have been strangely quiet this week considering you have a singles title shot. After all, the last time you challenged for singles gold you had a cameraman follow you around 24 hours a day.

AA: Yeah, and look how well that worked out. The dude turned on me during the match. So this week, I went to a secret location to train for my title shot.

SFJ #41: The location may not have been that secret, however.

AA: Wha?!?!

SFJ #41: We found secret footage of you in your secret location. Monkeys Behind the OOWF Banner, roll the footage!

AA: Can a Sexy Female Journalist do that?

(The footage reveals AA in a casino, betting sports, playing poker, drinking large quantities of whiskey and flirting with cocktail waitresses until the early hours of the morning.)

SFJ #41: So this is the respect you have for Firewoman? You were in Las Vegas?

AA: Well, actually Reno. Hey, did you get the name of that blonde waitress? She was kinda hot.

SFJ #41: You have a title match this week!!

AA: Are you yelling at me? Damn it, when did SFJs get aggressive?

SFJ #41: SFJs got aggressive when they're actually wrestlers posing as SFJs.

AA: But usually wrestlers dressed as women are pretty ugly. You know, I've done that a few times before. Besides, that hair looks pretty real.

(AA tugs on SFJ #41's hair, but it doesn't come off. Just as he realizes who SFJ #41 actually is, he's hit upside the head with a microphone by SFJ #41, aka FIREWOMAN! Firewoman puts the beatdown on AA, then picks the microphone up off the ground.)

FW: Respect that, AA! On July 9, at Midweek Mayhem in Mandalay, Burma (cheap pop from the crowd), I will defend my Onslaught title! So get your ass off the ground and really start preparing for your match!

AA: Damn, I wasn't expecting that.

FW: What, you think you're the only one who can surprise attack someone?

AA: No, you cut a pretty decent promo. That's shocking.

FW kicks AA in the lower groinal region, throws the microphone in his face and walks off.

[Road Warrior Shark]

Phantos & Lucios are inside the Dunkin Donuts Limousine riding around Mandalay. Phantos is playing on his Sony PSP and Lucios is talking occasional sips from his Aquafina bottle.

Lucios: Phantos, do you realize we've been here over a year now?

Phantos: I thought of that last week. We should have had an anniversary party or something.

Lucios: No.

Phantos: You could have at least gotten me a present. The first anniversary is paper, right?

Lucios: Why would I get you a present?

Phantos: It's our anniverasry! HOW COULD YOU FORGET???

Lucios: Our anniversary as a team isn't until September.

Phantos: Oh yeah. that makes sense.

Lucios. I was just thinking... In one year we've done alot here. Endorsements. Tag Team Champions. Trios Champions. More wins than any other tag team in that year.

Phantos: Let's celebrate by adding another Double O Double U F World Tag Team Championship to that resume' this week.

Lucios: That's the perfect anniversary gift partner.

[Fire-Babe]

In the Hallway of Random Encounters, Firewoman, once again, meets up with Moosehead Jack. Moose slow-applauds in mocking fashion.

MHJ: Great performance. You could really have a future career as a mic stand. Aren’t you not supposed to be wandering the halls alone? It’s a rare treat to see you without your entourage.

FW: I wish I could say the same, however meeting you in this hallway is seeming less and less random. What is it now?

MHJ: Nice belt you got there. Too bad you had to cheat to win.

FW: Yeah. Finally my cheating was better than Dead’s cheating. Are we done here?

She steps around him, but Moose turns and grabs her elbow

MHJ: Wait. This is just to talk.

FW: Remove that, or pull back a bloody stump. Moose complies. So talk.

MHJ: I just wanted to you know… It’s not too late. You can switch sides and stay with the winners.

FW: Are you really still singing this song? After everything, you really think I’d jump ship and abandon my—

MHJ: Team mates? [he starts to laugh hysterically] That’s rich. That’s really funny. I’m going to let you in on a little something. Your loyalty to them is touching, really it is. Surprising from you, even. But it’s misplaced. And it’s one-sided.

FW: How do you figure that?

MHJ: It’s obvious to anyone who is not delusional. I’ll give you an example. My attack on Alexander Darling sparked a backstage brawl the likes of which I don’t think the wrestling world has ever seen. Your part in that was impressive by the way. [Firewoman nods in agreement.] And no one likes Darling, outside of his family. Even his alleged partners can barely stand him, including you.

FW: So?

MHJ: Remember when we made an example of you in N. Korea? There was nothing. No one ran out and attacked anyone.

FW: Yes, they did. Moreland and Alexander were first—

MHJ: That was during the match, when there was a paying audience. They needed to save face. But there was no retaliation afterwards. None. They forgot all about you. They don’t care about you. They didn’t then, and they don’t now.

Firewoman’s expression remains the same, but her eyes flicker a bit

MHJ: I see I’ve touched a nerve.

FW: You’ve touched nothing. Now, get out of my--

MHJ: No, I think I have. Just wait. One day, you’ll see. I could just attack you right here in the hallway, and then you’d see no one would do anything for revenge. Unfortunately, since you’ve rejected this, our last offer, it’ll be too late then, and you’ll be on your own.

FW: You’re the delusional one. We’re done here. Unless you want to test the theory that you could actually do any damage.

MHJ: Nope. Don’t need to. Enjoy your teammates while you still have them.

Moosehead Jack walks away smiling. Firewoman glares after him, then looks around her, finally settling on punching a hole in the wall near where she is standing. She continues to glare in the direction of Moose’s exit.

[Demko]

(As she's glaring at Moose, Firewoman is hit in the back of the head with a forearm shiver, sending her sprawling to the ground. The camera pans up and finds The Amnesiac standing over her. He puts the boots to her.)

Amn: Moose gave you a chance. He gave you a hundred chances. Now we'll get to see just how 'LOYAL' your teammates really are.

(With that, The Amnesiac gives an arrogant sniff and walks away, leaving Fire in a crumpled heap on the floor.)

[Road Warrior Shark]

Amnesiac walks away and turns a corner and runs striaght into Phantos & Lucios. Without a word, a scuffle ensues, and the 2 on 1 situation turns quickly against THE Amnesiac. Lucios has him pinned against the wall held by the throat.

Lucios: You are the LAST person who should question anyone's loyalty.

(Phantos ties his hands and feet together with some handy cord. )

Phantos: Don't worry, I'm sure someone will be along to help you out shortly.

(Each man takes a parting shot and leaves)

[Eric O'Mac]

*... and they walk right into matching shots - via brass knuckles and chair - delivered by Tyson Kincaid and Eric O'Mac.*

Eric: Hey, you were right. Someone DID come along to help out their brother in Revolution XXX. Tyson, get that big bastard up.

*Tyson obliges, leaning Lucios against the wall.*(

Eric: OK, 3, 2, 1.

*X MARKS THE SPOT ON LUCIOS! The double superkick to the jaw puts Lucios out for good.*

Tyson: You want to do the same to Phantos?

Eric: Nah, leave the little bastard there. Let this be a lesson, when you mess with one of us, you mess with all of us. You want to tie my friend up with some cord? We'll kick the shit out of you. Hurt? Too much?

Ask me if a give a shit.

*Eric helps up Amnesiac, and the trio walk over to Ric Flair's Sandwich Shop...which has a new rule - per the OOWF - no fighting. As Firewoman already knows. Fade out*

[Tommy]

*And of course, they don't recognize Davin Moreland, dressed in suit and tie as they pass by them. He's got papers in front of him, CLEARLY meaning he's acting as the Assistant GM. Since the "no fighting" rule only applies to talent, and not management, Davin is well within his rights to clubber Eric, Tyson and Amnesiac about the head with a piece of rebar that he TOTALLY didn't carry there, and found on the ground. Totally. After making sure the two are unconscious, Davin goes back to his paperwork and puts it into his briefcase, heading for the GMs office*

DM: I guess my WORK here is done...

*Davin goes in the office and runs immediately into a laughing GM the Rick*

GMtR: I'm glad you're on my side.

DM: You should be. Am I done?

GMtR: Yes, you're officially talent for the rest of the day.

*Davin leaves*

*fade*

[Eric O'Mac]

WHY' DOES EVERYONE FORGET ABOUT AMNESIAC!

[iamdoug]

As The other members of Run DEA take care of business, we see the newest member Justin Sane come over to the prone Firewoman. He reaches down and grabs her shoulders helping her up. She quickly turns around pulls away from him.

FW: I'm fine, I don't need your help. (Firewoman turns to leave)

JS: Of course you don't toots. (With that Justin gives Fire a slap on the rump)

Firewoman turns around pissed and punches Justin right in the face, sending him to the ground. She places a foot on his throat, getting ready to tell him off. To her surprise, Justin immediately taps as an OOWF ref slides in.

Your winner and new OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Champion Firewoman.

Firewoman backs up as Justin gets to his feet and hands her the championship.

FW: What? But you love this belt.

JS: Yes, but I'm not stupid, I know team Bently is gonna jump me to try and steal it during my match against Undead this week, and I knew you would never let me just lay down for you. So I had to trick you.

FW: Why not keep it yourself.

JS: Run DEA holds three belts, and it is only a matter of time before Davin Mormon takes the world and team Aquaman the tags. So I know i'm the new guy and the "easy target" for them. You hold onto that until after Mayhem, and then we will decide where to go from that point.

FW: Man, This is just in...

JS: Sane? maybe.

As this is being said Davin Moreland, Phantos, Lucios, and Alexander Darling walk into the scene.

DM: Or maybe this is what "Team Unity" is really all about.

AD: Now let's get out of here before some loser decides to test how united we can be.

The entire group heads to the Run DEA executive suites as the camera fades to black.

[Tommy]

Jul 7, 2008 17:37:51 GMT -5 Eric O'Mac said:

WHY' DOES EVERYONE FORGET ABOUT AMNESIAC!

***OOC***Sorry, I fixed it. If only I had an Idea I would have remembered.

[Road Warrior Shark]

Phantos stares at Firewoman holding both of her championship belts.

Phantos: Whooooo! You're the gnarliest Double Champion Evar!!

Lucios, Davin, Alexander, Firewoman, & Justin: SHUT UP PHANTOS!

[fasteddie]

Ultimo Inc is WALKING!!!

(Ultimo Inc. makes their way to Ric's Sandwich Shop where they see Tyson, Eric, and the Amnesiac out cold. Tytan and Podvod head over to help them up. Steel heads to put in an oder.)


Podvod: What happened?

Tytan: Who got you? What happened to the know fighting rule?

Eric: It was the Assistant GM Davin.

Tytan: But...but...

Amnesiac: The rule only pertains to the Talent.

(Tytan then begins to help Tyson up when all of a sudden there is a loud crack and a broken tray. This is followed by Tyson Kincaid slumping back over and down to the ground. The camera pans back and sees Johnathan Steel standing there holding a broken lunch tray.)

Steel: In that case that one was for destroying my yacht you son of a bitch.

(Podvod who is helping the Amnesiac up smiles.)

Podvod:It's nice to see you finally came to your senses.

Tytan:Couldn't agree more.

(Tytan sticks out his massive fist and the Amnesiac cautiously looks to the crowd and then bumps knuckles with Tytan.)

Eric: (Surprised at what just happened) But what about Team Bennett? Aren't we all on the same side?

Steel: (Tossing the tray to the ground.) We still are. I just don't have to like you.

Tytan: Did you get what you needed boss?

Steel: Now I did. (Showing him the bag) Besides my sandwich order was to go.)

(Ultimo Inc then regroups and walks away.)

FADE OUT

[Deadly]

[The Dead is looking at the lineup for the week. He sees he is matched up against Justin Sane.]

Dead: Ha.

[Fade out.]

[fasteddie]

Later on back at Ultimo Inc undisclosed training facility...

(Tytan is laying down on the exam table and Podvod is getting an injection ready for him.)

Podvod: Now Steel wanted me to increase your dosage on the "magic water".

Tytan: So how's it going to affect me, and is it going to help me win?

Podvod:(Hesitant) Yes, it's going to help you. This is going to make you that much more of an animal then you already are.

Tytan: More of an animal...that could be interesting.

Podvod:(Slyly) Your telling me.

Tytan:Diana I didn't know you had it in you.

Podvod: What? I didn't say anything. We need to focus.

Tytan: Okay I'll remember that.

Podvod: Now what you heard about the last person that took the "Magic" to strong to fast is not true.

Tytan:But look at what it turned him into.

Podvod: But it took him that long to get rid of it, and that rapper gimmick is going to be help over his head for the rest of his career.

Tytan: But the money?

Podvod: I just don't want you to suffer from BGS (Bad Gimmick Syndrome)

Tytan: Thanks, but we got to to what the boss wants.

Podvod: So are you ready then?

Tytan:Yeah. Hit me with it.

(Podvod moves in with the syringe as the camera goes black.)

Fade.

[Attitude Adjuster]

AA catches up to Firewoman in the Hallway of Random Encounters.

FW: WHAT!?!?!?

AA: Hang on, hang on. Nothing going on here. I just wanted to ask if you realized how much money we could make with a Title vs. Title match July 9, at Midweek Mayhem in Mandalay, Burma (cheap pop from the crowd)?

FW: You don't have a...oh no you don't!

AA: Why not? After all, I am the two-time OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Champion, and it was originally made to be defended only during promos. It was like it was created for me!

FW: You lost it to a bottle of mustard!

AA: That was early on. Looking back, that wasn't so bad a loss. I mean, hell, one of these guys lost the belt to their own smega or something.

FW: Good point.

AA: So I figure you can just lay down in this hallway...

FW: Are you propositioning me!?!??!?! I'll kill you right here and now!!!

AA: No, no, no. Fingerpoke of doom. That's all I was thinking.

FW: No way!

AA: OK, fine. Then we'll have to do it the hard way.

Firewoman gets ready to fight, but AA just stands in front of her. FW relaxes, and AA points behind her. VIPER WITH THE CHAIN ASSISTED DEATH ELBOW!!!!! Firewoman goes down in a heap. AA covers and a ref comes from nowhere to make the three count.

Your new OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Champion, Attitude Adjuster!

AA: Thanks, Donnie.

DV: No problem, AA.

AA: Are these random encounters between us ever going to lead to anything?

DV: Good question. Let's remember to ask Moose one of these days.

[DevSop]

*A few hours later*

The cameras turn on and we see a pretty hectic Myanmar airport as people are running around trying to catch flights, pick up luggage, rent a car, and all that other airport stuff but then the camera starts to zoom in and we see Alexander and Alexis Darling sitting at a restaurant table. There’s a small laptop bag and a carry-on bag sitting on the floor next to Alexis as she sits there stirring her drink, which looks to be a screwdriver. After a few moments of awkward silence, Alexis starts to reach down for one of her bags.

Alexander: It’s not time yet, is it? I mean, I don’t even…

Alexis: No brother dear, we still have a little while before I’m scheduled to board. I was just going to grab the sleeping pills Sam gave me since they take about an hour to kick in and we should be right about takeoff by then.

Alexander: Hasn’t taken her long, has it?

Alexis: Be nice. She’s just helping me out. I’m sure she’s past all that and besides she wasn’t a bitch to me when I asked, so just let it go.

Alexander: Why have you two always been like that?

Alexis: It’s a sister thing. You wouldn’t get it.

Alexander: Mitch and I have never been like you two are. Hell even you and…

Alexis: Just let it go. It’s probably a good thing I’m leaving now actually. There’s not a chance we wind up hating each other.

Alexander: It’s not good for me. What the hell am I supposed to do without you? We’ve never been apart for that long really.

Alexis: What about college? There were semesters where we barely spoke.

Alexander: I don’t think being drunk for 5 months at a time counts. Since we got into this business together, even through all the shit we went through in Japan, we’ve been side by side every step of the way. And now you’re leaving me.

Alexis: I’m not leaving you Alex. We’ve been over this.

Alexander: I know and I still don’t get it.

Alexis: What’s to get? Bennett cannot keep thinking he can run this, run US, without repercussions. I’m going to find out his weak spot and exploit it.

Alexander: But why you?

Alexis: Cause I can get it done, you know that better than anyone. And if I get something on him, you know it won’t hurt us. That’s the bottom line and it always has been Alex. You know that, right?

Alexander: Yea, I know…but still I just won the belt and now you’re leaving. I mean I got to face Moose for Christ sakes this week. And Poe is still lurking and god knows who else.

Alexis: You’ll handle it brother dear. You’re a Darling and it’s what we do. We find a way to get things done and I know that when everyone gets back to the states for the anniversary, I’ll be there and you’ll still be holding gold. I have no doubts about that Alex.

Alexander: How can you be so sure?

Alexis: Because you’re my twin. You’re my other half and I know exactly what you are capable of.


ALL PASSENGERS FOR FLIGHT 815 NON-STOP TO LOS ANGELES, FIRST-CLASS BOARDING IS NOW BEGINNING


I guess that’s my cue Alex.

Alexander just sits there for a moment and doesn’t seem to want to move even as Alexis starts picking up her too bags. Something falls out of the pocket and as it flutters to the ground and Alexis reaches down to pick it up, we see a familiar signature on the envelope. Alexis slides the envelope back into her bag and she turns to face her brother and we see the trace of a smile forming on her face.

Alexander: What are you smiling at?

Alexis: Nothing. Don’t worry about it. You going to walk me to the gate or not?

Alexander nods and you can tell that he’s quite emotional but is trying to hide it as he picks up Alexis’ carry-on bag and the two begin a walk to the checkpoint. Alexis’ cell goes off as they walk and she checks the text message and does so at just the right angle so we can see what it says…

Things have been rough, but maybe time away will help. Will miss you. –DM

Another small smile passes across Alexis’ face as they get to the checkpoint. Alexander puts down the bag and turns his sister around and pulls her close for a BIG BIG BIG hug. Some may say an uncomfortable hug, but not me. No sirree bob. As normal a hug as you can see. There’s some whispering going as well, but nothing that can be picked up by any of the nearby ninja microphones. After what seems like a long time, Alexis finally pulls away and we see her wipe her face on her brother’s shirt and her eyes are somewhat red. She picks up her bags and heads through the checkpoint while her brother looks on. Just as she’s about to board the plane she turns back to her brother one last time, but instead of waving she points and yells out,

BEHIND YOU!!!

Before Alexander can even fully turn around, a barbed-wire bat slams into his skull. Moosehead Jack, Dead, and Blitz are standing behind Alexander even as Lexie screams from the runway towards the plane. Security is trying to calm her down and pushing her towards the plane and the last thing she sees as she turns the corner is Blitz moving Alexander into position and Dead CLOSING THE CASKET on her brother as his head slams against the tempered glass. Alex is now bleeding from where Moose hit him with the bat and now from the back of the head where he slammed into the glass.

Moosehead Jack: That goodbye was so damn heartfelt that I almost reconsidered doing this to you. But then I thought what better way to say goodbye to that whore sister of yours than to have the last thing she sees before leaving is me leaving you in a pool of blood.

Alexander: Fuck you Moose.

Blitz hits a spinning kick that knocks Alexander back to the ground.

Blitz: Watch your mouth boy.

Moose: Nah, let him talk. It’s fun listening to him run his mouth. But I doubt he runs it after Wednesday when his second transitional reign comes to an end.

Alexander: Over my dead body Moose.

Moose: That will be arranged.

Dead and Blitz drag Alexander back to his feet and he’s struggling, but due to the emotional departure he just had along with the bat, super kick, and everything else that’s been done, he doesn’t have a lot behind it and Moose is able to walk right up to him and he locks his hand behind his head…HEART PUNCH…Alexander stumbles but refuses to fall.

Moose: Oh fuck you.

Barbed-wire bat to the stomach, DDT on the concrete and the blood starts pooling around Alexander’s head.

Shine that title up for me Alex. You won’t have it after Wednesday. Trust me bitch.


*Fade out on the airplane taking off in the background*

[wld]

**SFJ#47 approaches L.D. Williams in the hallway of random encounters.**

SFJ#47: “L.D., this week you’re facing Seamus McNasty for the first time. Your thoughts?”

LDW: “Seamus McNasty. Yet another claimant to the title of toughest bastard in the OOWF. Seamus, you say you’ve been forced into tag teams, and now you want to prove yourself as a singles wrestler. Well, you’ll never have a better opportunity than this. Wednesday night you’re going to step into the ring with the greatest wrestler on the face of the planet. Make a good showing, and you’ll make your career. Beat me, and you’ll become a legend.
Seamus, I don’t need to say this, but bring your best to the ring Wednesday night. You have your opportunity. Let’s see what you can make of it.”

[Deleted]

Zoom into backstage area to see Seamus on the phone…

Seamus: “Ahhh Patrick good to hear from ya lad, how’s Twigger?”

Muffled voice of Patrick Murphy from the musical group [green] Gaelic Storm [/green]on the phone

Seamus: “Hahaha, so how’s married life treated ya…did she lay down the law?”

Voice…..

Seamus: “Have ya heard from Stevie…I haven’t seen him since the drag queen show in Dayton, Ohio…….hahaha yeah don’t go for the one”

Voice….

Seamus: “So your new CD hits stores today, I love the title [red] “What’s the Rumpus?” [/red], great stuff my friend”

Voice…..

Seamus: “Copy write infringement my ass, how about FREE advertising!...I was gonna name it Seven Nations but you know how uptight Kirk can be…”

Voice….

Seamus: “Dude I’m sooo fucking busy, besides it took me 3 fucking days to cleanup the fireworks….yeah the forklift full of fireworks wasn’t the brightest idea but you know Rory…the little fucker almost blew us up….Pat the forklift lifted 3 feet off the ground…me ears are still ringing…”

Voice…..

Seamus: “Yeah, LD Williams, one tough SOB, but it should be a good match, to be honest I’m just glad to be in a singles match…I’ve been stuck in tag team hell carrying Damon’s dead ass for so long….”

Voice…..

Seamus: “Ohhhh you know bring my a game, greatest wrestler, King Kong with Donkey Kong balls, the lion that roars, the promo that snores, pass me my smores, don’t let the door…me bad, you not aaaaaaiiiieeeeeaaaaa me Tarzen you Jane…same ol same ol promo”

Voice…..

Seamus: “Yeah I should go – I have to find out what happened to the extra mortars we had…last I seen Connor and Liam were tying them to the forks to make cannons out of them”

[fasteddie]

And now a word from our sponser....

(The camera comes up on Mr. Steel sitting behind his desk he has a very serious look on his face.)

Steel: Today I am not here to sell you anything. Today I am here to talk to you about a bad disease that rocks the wrestling world. No it is not steroid abuse or anything like that. This disease is worse then that. It is called BGS or Bad Gimmick Syndrome. It is a disease that has plagued this business that we have loved since we were all children. We have watched some of our favorite wrestlers suffer from this. Remember Adrian Adonis before he became Adorable. Ember One Man Gang that was before he became Akeem the African Dream. These were some of those wrestlers that got BGS and never recovered. Then there were others that got BGS early on in their careers and somehow managed to beat it.
Look at Kevin Nash. (Kevin pops his head into Steel's Office.)

Kevin Nash: Come on Steel do you have to remind everyone about that.

Steel: But Kevin you recovered and then took control of your own career.

KN: Fine, but make sure you mention Scott too. He still suffers some flash backs of The Diamond Stud.

SH: (Popping into the Office) Hey Yo! You can't forget about Razor Ramon too, but hey at least I didn't suffer from the likes of Oz and Vinnie Vegas.

Kevin: You know that was cold Scott, just cold.

SH: Sorry but I just call it as I see it. Now let's go get some drinks.

(They leave)

Steel: Yes those were two of the wrestlers that suffered but saw the light and got help. I want to help some of the other wrestler's that suffer from BGS. They exist here in the OOWF, look at one Outback Jack. He's a multi-personality Australian. Come on, he might as well Puke on command. I want to help the likes of guys like him. So I am starting a Foundation for BGS to help rid the world of Bad Gimmick once and for all. We are trying to get these guys to come in for help. And if they don't we to have ways to make an intervention. (Tytan walks in)

Tytan: Yeah, boss.

Steel: You ready to help Jack at Mayhem.

Tytan: One wrestler at a time boss that's the only way to do it.

Steel: Thanks Tytan. Now the rest of you if you want to help make a donation on the Ultimo Inc website. And together we can rid the world of BGS once and for all. Thank You.

Fade to black***

[blownspot]

<Stank is sitting at the bar with DH Magnusson when his smartphone vibrates indicating a call. Stank looks down at his phone, sees the name displayed there, and excuses himself to a small, private table outside the Destroyitarium, before answering.>

Stank - Hello?

"Don't act like you don't know who this is, jackass."

Stank - Simone. How are you?

Sim - I'm fine big bro. What's up?

Stank - Jared there?

Sim - Jared moved out three years ago. You would know that if you called more often.

Stank - How did mom take it?

Sim - How do you think?

Stank - Where did he go?

Sim - I don't know. Arizona I suppose given the area code he called from last.

Stank - When's the last time you spoke with him?

Sim - Why don't you ask mom?

Stank - NO! I mean... th... there's no need to...

Sim - I'm getting mom...

MOM! MOMMA! LUCAS IS ON THE PHONE! MOM!?

Stank - Fuck! Simone! Simone WHY YOU-

Hello?

Stank - Hey Momma.

Mom - Lucas? Boy why haven't you called? Why haven't you come by to visit?

Stank - I'm out of the country Momma.

Mom - Where you at?

Stank - Burma.

Mom - You still wrestlin?

Stank - Yes momma. Where do you think the checks I keep sending you come from?

Mom - Boy don't you sass me.

Stank - Sorry momma.

Mom - I don't know why you and Jared keep killing yourselves with that business. Hadn't y'all made enough money? I don't know how much more your bodies can take?

Stank - Momma... I need to get in contact with Jared. You know where he is?

Mom - He called me from Phoenix Arizona about a month ago? Gave me his number case I needed somethin... let me see if I can find it.

<Stank waits patiently while he listens to his mother flip through her address book.>

Mom - Here it is son. You ready?

Stank - Yeah give me the number.

Mom - 520... 626... 42... 3-

<Stank's cellphone is snatched out of his hand by CHRIS COLE!?!>

CC - He'll call you back.

Mom - Who is thi...?

<Cole ends the call.>

Stank - YOU GOT A DEATH WISH?!?

CC - Are you going to accept my challenge?

Stank - MOTHAFUCKA I'M GONNA WHOOP YOUR ASS!

CC - Then you accept.

<Stank SNATCHES his phone back out of Cole's hand!>

Stank - You are LUCKY I've got more important things to do than beating your ass right now.

<Cole laughs then starts to leave. Stank grabs him by the shoulder as he presses a button on his phone.>

Stank - Hold up there asshole. You gonna apologize to my mom.

CC - I will do no such thing.

Stank - Then I don't accept your chal-

CC - ALRIGHT alright... let go of me.

Hello?

Stank -Mom! You're on speaker phone.

Mom - Lucas? What happened? Who was that rude man?

Stank - Hang on momma he's standing right here.

<Stank glares at Cole.>

Stank - SAY IT!

CC- I... I apologize Miss... I'm sorry for interrupting your phone call with your son here. I'm also sorry I'm going to kick his ass in a match very soon.

Mom - You're gonna WHAT now?

<Stank takes the phone off speaker and puts it up to his ear.>

Stank - Forget it mom. He's delusional.

CC - Satisfied?

<Stank flips Cole the bird, turns and walks back into the Destroyitarium.>