2 Truths/1 Lie
Apr 12, 2009 3:56:51 GMT -5
Post by creepy on Apr 12, 2009 3:56:51 GMT -5
Here's a 2 Truths and 1 Lie dedicated to me saying stupid things. One is me being insensitive. One is me being an asshole. And one is me talking a language that I'm not fluent in and almost getting murdered for it (or, most certainly getting knifed). But remember, only two are complete truths and one is a lie. DECIDE!
Story #1
My Junior year of High School we had a lock-in after Prom so kids had a place to go to to not drink or fuck or whatever. I was really, really, cool so I went with my girlfriend at the time. During the night everyone played some games that any lame lock-in would have. These included Pin the Tail on the Principle, Free Throw Challenge!, Trivia, Dance contests and shit like that. At the end of the night there was a raffle that you could win prizes with tickets accumulated thru winning games or just competing in some.
At one point during the raffle, the number XXXX was called (I don't remember the exact number) and no one came up to collect the prize. I was laying my head down on my girl friends lap and couldn't see the stage. The number was called again. I said softly, "what, is the winner deaf?" She giggled. After the number was called again, I said loudly, "what retard doesn't know their name?!?!?!"
It was, in fact, Cameron. Our mentally challenged classmate that didn't know he had won and when his "date" found out, she couldn't tell the VP fast enough to make her not call it again. Everyone gasped. I got "The Look" from the VP and got In School Dentention for a week. She didn't believe me when I told her I didn't know it was Cameron. I must have apologized like 50 fucking times to the kid, but he never said a word to me again.
Story #2
I was at a bar a few years ago with some people from work and I went to the bathroom. As I came back, I said "Who's the Goth Girl over at the end of the bar?" Brooke says to me, "Oh, that's Sara. I went to High School with her. She's super sweet. She was burned over 30% of her body. You're an asshole."
Wow, did I feel like an asshole. In the dimlight on the move half drunk with just a glance and the girl was wearing all black. Had I known............ This still gets brought up, even after I explain my point of view.
Story #3
So, a few years ago my wife and our buddy bnuts and I went to a shithole bar named the "They Ain't All Here Club" or something equally retarded. It was the kind of place that only had Busch and Busch Light on tap and that had some wierd old lady (I presume with a drug problem) that kept trying to sell my wife shit. Like a lighter, one hoop earring and a dirty plastic cup for 3 dollars. My wife declined, but the lady leaves and comes back 20 minutes later and tries to sell my wife a hi-lighter, an Air Bud VHS tape, and a comb for 5 dollars. After another decline the lady said she'd be right back and never returned. Anyways............
Here's where I almost got us killed. We started playing pool and after a few games, some half drunk mexican guy walks up and puts his quarters down. He's got next game. I hate this because I just want to play my buddy, but rules are rules and he's got next game, so I had to sit while bnuts played this guy. And he takes forever. Doesn't pay attention and keeps forgetting if he's stripes or solids. We get along with the guy well enough and he's joking in broken english. There is also about 10 of his buddies there just chilling out and drinking. Everyone's getting along, but we still feel kind of weird. Not like we're the minority weird, but more that we were in a rough bar at a rough side of town and everyone there seems to know everyone and it's filled with these hispanic dudes and white trash old people that look like they're all on crack. I did not want to be there at all.
I remembered the term "Papi Chulo" from that Essa Rios guy that wrestled for the WWE back in the day and that his name meant Pimp Daddy in a graphic the E showed once. I questioned some Mexicans I worked with and they confirmed it as meaning Pimp Daddy. I think you know where this is going. While playing the hispanic guy, at one point he keeps getting easily distracted and I say, "Andelay, Papi Chulo!" or however it's spelled. He looked straight at me and said, "I'll show you Papi Chulo" and started walking toward me with the pool stick clenched tightly in his hand. My buddy and my wife get in the way of the guy and explain that my spanish is very bad and I didn't know exactly what that meant (He says to them, "I ain't no man pussy" so I guess I now know what it means) and that I didn't mean any disrespect. I did not, in any way, want to get in any kind of altercation with this guy. I don't fuck with army dudes or mexicans. Or Oriental people. He wearily gazes a peirced glare at me and goes back to filling pockets. My buddy threw the match quickly (Or so he said) and we make a quick retreat to our car. The 10 or so hispanic dudes follow us out to the parking lot and we get the fuck out of there doubletime. I didn't mean any disrepect, but the dude took some nonetheless. My bad. We don't go to shit hole bars anymore. I also don't speak spanish to anyone that I don't know really, really well.
So, which is it? I meant no harm in any remark, but I did cause some, so I guess I fucked up. See, I'm not just someone who says stupid shit on a message board. I sometimes say stupid shit in real life, too.
Story #1
My Junior year of High School we had a lock-in after Prom so kids had a place to go to to not drink or fuck or whatever. I was really, really, cool so I went with my girlfriend at the time. During the night everyone played some games that any lame lock-in would have. These included Pin the Tail on the Principle, Free Throw Challenge!, Trivia, Dance contests and shit like that. At the end of the night there was a raffle that you could win prizes with tickets accumulated thru winning games or just competing in some.
At one point during the raffle, the number XXXX was called (I don't remember the exact number) and no one came up to collect the prize. I was laying my head down on my girl friends lap and couldn't see the stage. The number was called again. I said softly, "what, is the winner deaf?" She giggled. After the number was called again, I said loudly, "what retard doesn't know their name?!?!?!"
It was, in fact, Cameron. Our mentally challenged classmate that didn't know he had won and when his "date" found out, she couldn't tell the VP fast enough to make her not call it again. Everyone gasped. I got "The Look" from the VP and got In School Dentention for a week. She didn't believe me when I told her I didn't know it was Cameron. I must have apologized like 50 fucking times to the kid, but he never said a word to me again.
Story #2
I was at a bar a few years ago with some people from work and I went to the bathroom. As I came back, I said "Who's the Goth Girl over at the end of the bar?" Brooke says to me, "Oh, that's Sara. I went to High School with her. She's super sweet. She was burned over 30% of her body. You're an asshole."
Wow, did I feel like an asshole. In the dimlight on the move half drunk with just a glance and the girl was wearing all black. Had I known............ This still gets brought up, even after I explain my point of view.
Story #3
So, a few years ago my wife and our buddy bnuts and I went to a shithole bar named the "They Ain't All Here Club" or something equally retarded. It was the kind of place that only had Busch and Busch Light on tap and that had some wierd old lady (I presume with a drug problem) that kept trying to sell my wife shit. Like a lighter, one hoop earring and a dirty plastic cup for 3 dollars. My wife declined, but the lady leaves and comes back 20 minutes later and tries to sell my wife a hi-lighter, an Air Bud VHS tape, and a comb for 5 dollars. After another decline the lady said she'd be right back and never returned. Anyways............
Here's where I almost got us killed. We started playing pool and after a few games, some half drunk mexican guy walks up and puts his quarters down. He's got next game. I hate this because I just want to play my buddy, but rules are rules and he's got next game, so I had to sit while bnuts played this guy. And he takes forever. Doesn't pay attention and keeps forgetting if he's stripes or solids. We get along with the guy well enough and he's joking in broken english. There is also about 10 of his buddies there just chilling out and drinking. Everyone's getting along, but we still feel kind of weird. Not like we're the minority weird, but more that we were in a rough bar at a rough side of town and everyone there seems to know everyone and it's filled with these hispanic dudes and white trash old people that look like they're all on crack. I did not want to be there at all.
I remembered the term "Papi Chulo" from that Essa Rios guy that wrestled for the WWE back in the day and that his name meant Pimp Daddy in a graphic the E showed once. I questioned some Mexicans I worked with and they confirmed it as meaning Pimp Daddy. I think you know where this is going. While playing the hispanic guy, at one point he keeps getting easily distracted and I say, "Andelay, Papi Chulo!" or however it's spelled. He looked straight at me and said, "I'll show you Papi Chulo" and started walking toward me with the pool stick clenched tightly in his hand. My buddy and my wife get in the way of the guy and explain that my spanish is very bad and I didn't know exactly what that meant (He says to them, "I ain't no man pussy" so I guess I now know what it means) and that I didn't mean any disrespect. I did not, in any way, want to get in any kind of altercation with this guy. I don't fuck with army dudes or mexicans. Or Oriental people. He wearily gazes a peirced glare at me and goes back to filling pockets. My buddy threw the match quickly (Or so he said) and we make a quick retreat to our car. The 10 or so hispanic dudes follow us out to the parking lot and we get the fuck out of there doubletime. I didn't mean any disrepect, but the dude took some nonetheless. My bad. We don't go to shit hole bars anymore. I also don't speak spanish to anyone that I don't know really, really well.
So, which is it? I meant no harm in any remark, but I did cause some, so I guess I fucked up. See, I'm not just someone who says stupid shit on a message board. I sometimes say stupid shit in real life, too.