[salmonjunkie]

I've been coming around here but not posting much of anything lately, so here's a chance to start posting again. I have no idea if this thread will be a hit or a bomb, but whatever. I'm bored tonight.

Maybe some of you have known a strip club DJ or someone who used to be one at some point of their life, well, as you may know, that is what I am now. Don't know how much longer I'll be doing this, but for now, it's quite the experience. However, may or may not have noticed, I don't make much mention of this on my Facebook, and for good reason.

Some of you are probably wondering what it's like, what it really entails, and probably have more interesting/silly/fun questions than that. Feel free to ask anything that only a strip club DJ could answer!

[OpTard]

are you already sick of poison and motley crue?

[ALL CAPS]

What's the most ridiculous stripper name you've heard?

Do you have a fake DJ name?

Can anyone tell how fucking asian you are in your dark little booth?

Is there sex in the champagne room?

What are tonight's drink specials?

[The Jewish Cunthead]

Do your shoes stick to the floor?

[Lou]

Do all strip club DJs have a pony tail?

[Lou]

How do I get rid of this itch?

[BTR]

Have you ever seen a naked girl?

What's a vagina?

[Habs]

do you get house discounts on dances?

Did they do something special for your birthday?

Meet any celebrities that spend ridiculous amount of money on girls?

Do the girls find regular customers pathetic?

Can you drink at the place you work? (I know that in some strip clubs in the states, you can't drink)

I the pay good? Are you paid under the table?

When a girl (outside of work) asks you what you do for a living, do you say base player, dj or dj in a strip club?

Is the 401k good?

How many girl also hook on the side? What's the policy on this?

How much of the money goes to the girls?

Do they actually pay to dance there?

Why do I have so many questions?

[creepy]

Is the band done?

Do you have any Asain strippers? I don't think I've ever seen an asian stripper.

Have you ever heard of a guy doing the "walk of shame" to the ATM to get more money for a stripper and then ask for change? Well, you have now because I've done it.

Bang one yet?

[BTR]

Are lap dances half-off for the next twenty minutes?

[OpTard]

what's it like working in a chippendales?

[Lou]

Is she really going out with him?

Is she really gonna take him home tonight?

[Outback Frito Pendejo]

Apr 13, 2010 12:09:42 GMT -5 Lou said:

Is she really going out with him?

Is she really gonna take him home tonight?

Exalt!

[salmonjunkie]

are you already sick of poison and motley crue?

Nope. I love those bands. And I don't play them nearly as much as you'd think. Actually, I play Motley Crue as much as you think, but I love the Crue. My first concert, after all. I've probably only played Poison 6 times in the month I've worked there.

-

What's the most ridiculous stripper name you've heard?

"Beautiful" My go-to's are "put your hands together for the beautiful/lovely/sexy so-and-so." "The beautiful Beautiful, the lovely Beautiful, and the sexy Beautiful" all sound so fucking stupid.

Do you have a fake DJ name?

Nope. Strip club DJs are nameless, as we never announce ourselves. I'm just the pervy voice over the speaker system. I'm like the voice of God, at a strip club.

Can anyone tell how fucking asian you are in your dark little booth?

Only if they come up close.

Is there sex in the champagne room?

No, but I know one girl is going to get in major trouble when management finally catches her giving handjobs and blowjobs. It's against the law, and I work for the corporate strip club (easy to figure out who that is) . Absolutely not tolerated.

What are tonight's drink specials?

In the state of Washington, there is no alcohol served at strip clubs. So it's only as special as the $10 for bottomless well drinks (sodas) and the $5 Red Bulls on top of that.

-

Do your shoes stick to the floor?

It's a strip club, not a peep show AKA whack shack.

-

Do all strip club DJs have a pony tail?

none of ours do.

-

How do I get rid of this itch?

duh -



-

Have you ever seen a naked girl?

Your sister.

What's a vagina?

It's that part of your sister I plug every night.

-

do you get house discounts on dances?

It is company policy that I cannot get dances. However, I have had girls grind me standing up when we get silly and dance. I've gotten titties in my face from one of my favorite girls at no charge (and she's my best tipper!), and I have a good enough relationship with about 5 of them where I can smack their ass whenever I want. I've also given one of my favorite girls a lap dance for free. That was pretty special.

Did they do something special for your birthday?

The hottest girl in the club totally let me grind the hell out of her perfectly luscious ass. Easily in the top 3 of the best looking asses I've ever had the pleasure to grind.

Meet any celebrities that spend ridiculous amount of money on girls?

Nope. I have yet to see a celeb come to our club. But a lot of old folks do. There's one guy who is so smitten with one of my day-shift girls that he took out a loan on his fucking house to spend money on her.

Do the girls find regular customers pathetic?

For the most part, no. They know what they're there for and accept it. But for the guy I just mentioned, absofuckinglutely.

Can you drink at the place you work? (I know that in some strip clubs in the states, you can't drink)

No alcohol in WA strip clubs.

Is the pay good? Are you paid under the table?

Minimum wage plus tips. I work day shift right now so tips suck. Not under the table. Pay will be better when I make it to night shift.

When a girl (outside of work) asks you what you do for a living, do you say base player, dj or dj in a strip club?

Bass player and DJ in a strip club. Seattle's a freaky city, and most girls I've met since I've worked there actually think it's pretty cool.

Is the 401k good?

what 401k? I don't even have health benefits

How many girl also hook on the side? What's the policy on this?

Corporate policy is absolutely no hooking. There is another strip club in Seattle called Rick's that is owned by a mobster. Girls there hook all the time.

How much of the money goes to the girls?

All lap dances and tips, after paying the house.

Do they actually pay to dance there?

Yes. $70 for day shift, $130 for night shift

Why do I have so many questions?

Beacuse you're a perv.

-

Is the band done?

No. But it may be soon.

Do you have any Asain strippers? I don't think I've ever seen an asian stripper.

Where the fuck do you live? I've never been to a strip club that doesn't have asian strippers.

Have you ever heard of a guy doing the "walk of shame" to the ATM to get more money for a stripper and then ask for change? Well, you have now because I've done it.

I've seen it plenty of times before I worked here. Me and my buddies used to go to Vegas all of the time and I think only one time did I go there an not go to a strip club (when I was with my younger female cousins), and about half of the time at least one of us have done the walk of shame. I admit, I have once too. But not as bad as a friend of mine who took $500 out of the ATM one time.

Bang one yet?

Nope.

Are lap dances half-off for the next twenty minutes?

Being the club closed 5 minutes ago, nope.

what's it like working in a chippendales?

Banana hammocks are a tax write off.

-

Is she really going out with him?

Is she really gonna take him home tonight?

LOL

[Habs]

Thanks Thai, this has been.... informative.

But I still have more.

Do the girls like each other or is this some big competition and every girl hate each other?

Do most of the girls like what they are doing or do they loath it?

% of girls that do it high?

[ALL CAPS]

Why do you hate Jesus?

[salmonjunkie]

Do the girls like each other or is this some big competition and every girl hate each other?

The day girls like each other. Some girls don't like others.

Do most of the girls like what they are doing or do they loath it?

I actually think some of the girls like what they do - at least on stage. I don't know if they actually like the lap dancing. Not a question I've ever wanted to ask.

% of girls that do it high?

somewhere between 50-85%

-

Why do you hate Jesus?

Because he doesn't tip well.

[Deleted]

Is tea-bagging allowed?

If 2+2=23, how many pancakes does it take to tile a roof?

[BTR]

If I leave a comment on you on what I imagine to be your company's website (there's a comment section!), can you get fired? Or if I'm nice, a raise?

How much disinfectant is in the storage closet?

Is it kosher for women who come to the club as customers to get topless? That happened at Brad's bachelor party. He took his shirt off for no reason.

[The Canadian Content]

Apr 14, 2010 4:36:32 GMT -5 salmonjunkie said:

Only if they come up close.

Do you encourage this?

[ALL CAPS]

Apr 15, 2010 9:13:20 GMT -5 BTR said:

Is it kosher for women who come to the club as customers to get topless? That happened at Brad's bachelor party. He took his shirt off for no reason.

To distract the bouncers from the fact that you took your pants off for that old homeless lady isn't "no reason".

[Outback Frito Pendejo]

Who is the evil genius who persuaded not only strippers but ordinary chicks in dance clubs to grind with guys they don't even know? Can he be sent back in time to when I was young?

[salmonjunkie]

Is tea-bagging allowed?
We don't serve tea.

If 2+2=23, how many pancakes does it take to tile a roof?
It would all be moot when the maple syrup rain comes and leaks all over your nice linens.

If I leave a comment on you on what I imagine to be your company's website (there's a comment section!), can you get fired? Or if I'm nice, a raise?
There's a comment section?

How much disinfectant is in the storage closet?
Not sure, but I always keep hand sanitizer at the DJ booth.

Is it kosher for women who come to the club as customers to get topless? That happened at Brad's bachelor party. He took his shirt off for no reason.
What's with this jew talk?

Only if they come up close.
Do you encourage this?
As long as I don't get stains on my nice shirt, they can come anywhere they want.

Who is the evil genius who persuaded not only strippers but ordinary chicks in dance clubs to grind with guys they don't even know? Can he be sent back in time to when I was young?
Mr. Jose Cuervo.

[Deleted]

Apr 16, 2010 12:21:14 GMT -5 salmonjunkie said:

Only if they come up close.
Do you encourage this?
As long as I don't get stains on my nice shirt, they can come anywhere they want.

So you know a lot of squirters, huh?

[salmonjunkie]

Apr 16, 2010 12:47:06 GMT -5 @gatorbait said:

Apr 16, 2010 12:21:14 GMT -5 salmonjunkie said:

Only if they come up close.
Do you encourage this?
As long as I don't get stains on my nice shirt, they can come anywhere they want.

So you know a lot of squirters, huh?

I know you guys!