[The VP]

Coming soon to a TV near you!

[The VP]

Sunday
7:00-8:00 NFL Primetime
8:00-11:00 Men's World Cup
11:00-12:00 Sportscenter

It's sports night at the Den!!

[The VP]

Monday
7:00-7:30 Peter Jennings World News Tonight
7:30-8:30 Planet Earth
8:30-9:30 The Civil War
9:30-10:30 John Adams
10:30-11:30 Biography
11:30-12:00 Politically Incorrect

A night to stretch those brain cells you haven't killed yet...

[The VP]

Tuesday
7:00-8:00 Minute to Win It
8:00-9:00 The Carol Burnett Show
9:00-9:30 The Cosby Show
9:30-10:00 Whose Line is It Anyway?
10:00-10:30 The Muppet Show
10:30-11:00 Bosom Buddies
11:00-11:30 Press Your Luck
11:30-12:00 Not Necessarily The News

Short Shows for Short People!

[The VP]

Wednesday - A Mountain of Lyin', Love, & Lust
7:00-8:00 Days of Our Lives
8:00-9:00 Pan Am
9:00-10:00 Dallas
10:00-11:00 Boston Public
11:00-12:00 The Kennedys


A Night for the Special Cougar in Your Life


(which then becomes...)

A Night of the Days of Our Lives Drinking Game!

Rules:

Take one drink when:

Sammy lusts after Austin.
Carrie whines about Austin to anyone who'll listen.
Marlena wears those awful green contacts.
Celeste warns Stefano about the "greater powers than yourself" (said in a mysteriously ambiguous accent)
Jon Black wears a solid-colored pocket-T.

Take two drinks when:

Kristen talks about being faithful.
Tony pretends not to see Kristen taking her birth control pills.
Grandma Horton tells Gina she's Hope.
Billie whines about getting married.
Bo talks about getting married in the snow.
Jack talks about getting Jennifer back.
Jennifer tells Peter its never gonna happen.

Take three drinks when:

The desecrater strikes.
Jon's eyebrow goes up.
Alan explains how he no longer is a "man" (and if he is no longer a "man" why doesn't he talk like a boy soprano?)
Every time Lucas tells Sammie to give it up.

[The VP]

Thursday
7:00-8:00 From The Earth to the Moon
8:00-9:00 Psych
9:00-10:00 White Collar
10:00-11:00 Playmakers
11:00-12:00 Late Night with David Letterman

For a phenominal fee, Gus and Shawn will also read the script to the Playmakers season finale...

[The VP]

Friday
7:00-10:00 The Summer Olympics
10:00-12:00 Headbanger's Ball

The Cougar in your life will sit through the loooong Olympics, but only if there's some great music afterwards...

[The VP]

Saturday
7:00-8:30 The Wide World of Sports
8:30-9:30 Sportscentury
9:30-10:30 American Gladiators
10:30-11:00 The Boondocks
11:00-11:30 Pop Up Video
11:30-12:00 Land of the Lost


Saturday night's all right for fighting - and it's also all right for Variety!

Jack and Dianne on Pop Up Video, anyone?