ROH Review 02/25/12
Feb 28, 2012 20:26:33 GMT -5
Post by Jack Quinn on Feb 28, 2012 20:26:33 GMT -5
We are still at the Du Burns Arena in Baltimore Maryland…….at what point does it stop being a wrestling event and start being a hostage situation?
We open with a recap of last week’s events between Charlie Haas and the Briscoes. Haas still asserts that if you hold up a chair, Mark Briscoe will just slam his head into it because he is that damn stupid. I think I know people like that. Mark got the win last week and Charlie embraced his inner heel by holding up a chair in the middle of the ring, and sure enough, Mark ran headfirst right into it. It’s like a bell to Pavlov’s dogs. We end with Nigel and Kevin holding ten grand from Charlie. Straight cash homies.
Nigel and Kevin are in the ring, we are going to hear from the Briscoes, who are two angry chicken farmers. We start with a tag match, but FIRST previews!
-The Young Bucks don’t have much respect for Caprice Coleman and Cedric Alexander, and they also call the Briscoes nerds. Young Bucks need to work on their promo skills.
-Coleman and Alexander retort, one hits a great line “bring your Sports Entertainment attitude and your independent scene bodies.” Other than that, a whole lot of yelling. Calm down guys.
CEDRIC ALEXANDER & CAPRICE COLEMAN vs. THE YOUNG BUCKS
Kevin Kelly calls the Young Bucks hooligans. Well that will certainly put them in their place. The Bucks are riding high having put Rhett Titus out with a knee injury. The Bucks still look like they picked up the Hardy’s tights from 2000 at a yardsale. Ditch the bell bottoms boys. The Bucks may not be much for fashion, but holy shit they are slick in the ring. TNA kind of dropped the ball by letting these guys walk. Coleman and Alexander hit some kind of weird superkick/faceplant thing on one of the bucks, looked like they broke his neck, but not so much. More Bang For Your Buck ends it, that is also a pretty sweet move. This was a really solid match. The Bucks should make a good challenger for the Briscoes, but I can’t see ROH putting the titles on them.
TONIGHT! Davey Richards vs. Jay Lethal!
-Veda Scott talks to the Embassy. If Lethal wins tonight, Ciampa’s match becomes a world title match. Something tells me that isn’t going to happen. Ciampa dares Lethal to win the title so he can beat him. Interesting. Be a man, and on March 4th he will humble him down to a boy. Is the Iron Sheik giving Ciampa promo ideas?
-Kevin Kelly pimps the anniversary show. The Young Bucks come out again. They are not fans of the Briscoes. Shocking I know.
-Kevin Kelly is back in the ring, and his guest is the Briscoe Brothers. Mark looks no worse for the wear after running into a chair last week, though, how would you really know? I guess you couldn’t do a sit down interview with them because they would just slam their heads into the chairs the whole time. Dem Boys vs. Dem Lady Boys. The Briscoes are going to New York and make the Bucks their personal bitches. ROH is certainly back on their homoerotic path. The Briscoes also have not forgot about winning FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS from the House of Truth a few weeks ago. They were going to use it for a new manure shed on the chicken farm. Well that is certainly money well spent. Showdown in the Sun, they face WGTT. Someone is leaving on a body bag, I think you meant IN, but you know what…..it’s the Briscoes not Shakespeare.
INSIDE ROH
-Steen re-destroys Andy Ridge. Jimmy Jacobs comes out and makes a statement for short guys everywhere. I saw what Jacobs did with the whole Age of the Fall debut. I have high hopes for a Steen/Jacobs match. Jacobs looks all emo, Fire will swoon. It’s his turn to be evil, again, can we just team these two up? When evil faces evil, is there ever a winner? YES, we win!
-Steen wants Jimmy to make him bleed so he will remember the evil man that he is. This feud has the potential to be awesome.
-All Night Express takes on WGTT at the Anniversary show. Titus is back earlier than expected from his knee injury. Titus reminds me of the guy from Nickleback.
-Next week Eddie Edwards faces Roderick Strong for a title shot. Strong also wants Lethal to win so he can beat him for the title. That really isn’t saying a whole lot about Lethal two guys want him to win the title so they can beat him rather than Davey Richards for the title. Putting Davey over kind of big there. Oh, and I still don’t care about Roderick Strong.
-Veda Scott talks to Eddie Edwards and Adam Cole. Veda asks Eddie for his pick in tonights match, Eddie wonders about Davey’s focus. Adam chimes in that Davey is distracted and says he will be better than Kyle O’Reily. Thanks for playing Adam. They face the House of Truth next week. That should be a good match too.
DAVEY RICHARDS vs. JAY LETHAL
World title match. I am still not really on board with Davey Richards. The guy is good and all, but I don’t know, there is just something about him.
-commercial first – Kevin Steen talks about Showdown in the Sun, Canadians are not used to seeing sun in March. Kevin Kelly says Cornette will give Steen a title match over his dead body, Steen considers this, then says he guesses he has some killing to do. See, this is why I love Steen
Back to the match! You know one thing I don’t like about Davey? That stupid hand over the face thing he does. Stop it. Good match between these two, this recap is not going to do it justice. I am not about to try and recap this move by move. Nigel pimps the fact that this is a WRESTLING match, thank you Nigel. I am getting tired of Sports Entertainment. Richards breaks out the Trailer Hitch and Jamie Noble gets a shout out from Nigel. Again, this is why I like the ROH commentary team, they have no problem mentioning someone from another promotion. Tomasso Ciampa wanders out with a steel chair……and somehow Mark Briscoe doesn’t run head first into it. He takes a seat at ringside, cue the ominous music as we go to our last commercial break! Back from the break, Davey does a head first dive and looks like he breaks his neck, but clearly Davey Richards has no bones to break…..that or he just no sold a broken neck. Davey says something to Tomasso Ciampa, probably that his tights look silly and Ciampa gets in his face. Kyle O’Reily races to the ring and calms things down and gets Davey back into the ring, but then hangs around ringside, in a move that I am CERTAIN will not come into play later. And now…..here comes the House of Truth to ringside. I think an impromptu lumberjack match might break out. I hate when that happens. And now Eddie Edwards and Adam Cole come out too. Sure, why not? I think Jake Roberts and Justin Credible are in the back too, have them come on down. Truth Martini tries to get involved, which leads to a huge brawl outside. Lethal catches Richards with possible the WORST elbow I have ever seen, but only gets a two count. Security comes out to stop things, but THAT never works. Lethal goes for the Lethal injection, but runs into Adam Cole and gets pinned with a pretty pedestrian kick to the head. ROH needs to work on the ends of their matches. Even though the end was kind of weak, this was a GREAT match. I would venture to guess that there was as much wrestling in one hour of ROH as there was in six hours of WWE/TNA this week.
Next week…..will ROH finally release the hostages from the Du Burns Arena? Also, Edwards vs. Strong for a title shot! Tune in!
We open with a recap of last week’s events between Charlie Haas and the Briscoes. Haas still asserts that if you hold up a chair, Mark Briscoe will just slam his head into it because he is that damn stupid. I think I know people like that. Mark got the win last week and Charlie embraced his inner heel by holding up a chair in the middle of the ring, and sure enough, Mark ran headfirst right into it. It’s like a bell to Pavlov’s dogs. We end with Nigel and Kevin holding ten grand from Charlie. Straight cash homies.
Nigel and Kevin are in the ring, we are going to hear from the Briscoes, who are two angry chicken farmers. We start with a tag match, but FIRST previews!
-The Young Bucks don’t have much respect for Caprice Coleman and Cedric Alexander, and they also call the Briscoes nerds. Young Bucks need to work on their promo skills.
-Coleman and Alexander retort, one hits a great line “bring your Sports Entertainment attitude and your independent scene bodies.” Other than that, a whole lot of yelling. Calm down guys.
CEDRIC ALEXANDER & CAPRICE COLEMAN vs. THE YOUNG BUCKS
Kevin Kelly calls the Young Bucks hooligans. Well that will certainly put them in their place. The Bucks are riding high having put Rhett Titus out with a knee injury. The Bucks still look like they picked up the Hardy’s tights from 2000 at a yardsale. Ditch the bell bottoms boys. The Bucks may not be much for fashion, but holy shit they are slick in the ring. TNA kind of dropped the ball by letting these guys walk. Coleman and Alexander hit some kind of weird superkick/faceplant thing on one of the bucks, looked like they broke his neck, but not so much. More Bang For Your Buck ends it, that is also a pretty sweet move. This was a really solid match. The Bucks should make a good challenger for the Briscoes, but I can’t see ROH putting the titles on them.
TONIGHT! Davey Richards vs. Jay Lethal!
-Veda Scott talks to the Embassy. If Lethal wins tonight, Ciampa’s match becomes a world title match. Something tells me that isn’t going to happen. Ciampa dares Lethal to win the title so he can beat him. Interesting. Be a man, and on March 4th he will humble him down to a boy. Is the Iron Sheik giving Ciampa promo ideas?
-Kevin Kelly pimps the anniversary show. The Young Bucks come out again. They are not fans of the Briscoes. Shocking I know.
-Kevin Kelly is back in the ring, and his guest is the Briscoe Brothers. Mark looks no worse for the wear after running into a chair last week, though, how would you really know? I guess you couldn’t do a sit down interview with them because they would just slam their heads into the chairs the whole time. Dem Boys vs. Dem Lady Boys. The Briscoes are going to New York and make the Bucks their personal bitches. ROH is certainly back on their homoerotic path. The Briscoes also have not forgot about winning FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS from the House of Truth a few weeks ago. They were going to use it for a new manure shed on the chicken farm. Well that is certainly money well spent. Showdown in the Sun, they face WGTT. Someone is leaving on a body bag, I think you meant IN, but you know what…..it’s the Briscoes not Shakespeare.
INSIDE ROH
-Steen re-destroys Andy Ridge. Jimmy Jacobs comes out and makes a statement for short guys everywhere. I saw what Jacobs did with the whole Age of the Fall debut. I have high hopes for a Steen/Jacobs match. Jacobs looks all emo, Fire will swoon. It’s his turn to be evil, again, can we just team these two up? When evil faces evil, is there ever a winner? YES, we win!
-Steen wants Jimmy to make him bleed so he will remember the evil man that he is. This feud has the potential to be awesome.
-All Night Express takes on WGTT at the Anniversary show. Titus is back earlier than expected from his knee injury. Titus reminds me of the guy from Nickleback.
-Next week Eddie Edwards faces Roderick Strong for a title shot. Strong also wants Lethal to win so he can beat him for the title. That really isn’t saying a whole lot about Lethal two guys want him to win the title so they can beat him rather than Davey Richards for the title. Putting Davey over kind of big there. Oh, and I still don’t care about Roderick Strong.
-Veda Scott talks to Eddie Edwards and Adam Cole. Veda asks Eddie for his pick in tonights match, Eddie wonders about Davey’s focus. Adam chimes in that Davey is distracted and says he will be better than Kyle O’Reily. Thanks for playing Adam. They face the House of Truth next week. That should be a good match too.
DAVEY RICHARDS vs. JAY LETHAL
World title match. I am still not really on board with Davey Richards. The guy is good and all, but I don’t know, there is just something about him.
-commercial first – Kevin Steen talks about Showdown in the Sun, Canadians are not used to seeing sun in March. Kevin Kelly says Cornette will give Steen a title match over his dead body, Steen considers this, then says he guesses he has some killing to do. See, this is why I love Steen
Back to the match! You know one thing I don’t like about Davey? That stupid hand over the face thing he does. Stop it. Good match between these two, this recap is not going to do it justice. I am not about to try and recap this move by move. Nigel pimps the fact that this is a WRESTLING match, thank you Nigel. I am getting tired of Sports Entertainment. Richards breaks out the Trailer Hitch and Jamie Noble gets a shout out from Nigel. Again, this is why I like the ROH commentary team, they have no problem mentioning someone from another promotion. Tomasso Ciampa wanders out with a steel chair……and somehow Mark Briscoe doesn’t run head first into it. He takes a seat at ringside, cue the ominous music as we go to our last commercial break! Back from the break, Davey does a head first dive and looks like he breaks his neck, but clearly Davey Richards has no bones to break…..that or he just no sold a broken neck. Davey says something to Tomasso Ciampa, probably that his tights look silly and Ciampa gets in his face. Kyle O’Reily races to the ring and calms things down and gets Davey back into the ring, but then hangs around ringside, in a move that I am CERTAIN will not come into play later. And now…..here comes the House of Truth to ringside. I think an impromptu lumberjack match might break out. I hate when that happens. And now Eddie Edwards and Adam Cole come out too. Sure, why not? I think Jake Roberts and Justin Credible are in the back too, have them come on down. Truth Martini tries to get involved, which leads to a huge brawl outside. Lethal catches Richards with possible the WORST elbow I have ever seen, but only gets a two count. Security comes out to stop things, but THAT never works. Lethal goes for the Lethal injection, but runs into Adam Cole and gets pinned with a pretty pedestrian kick to the head. ROH needs to work on the ends of their matches. Even though the end was kind of weak, this was a GREAT match. I would venture to guess that there was as much wrestling in one hour of ROH as there was in six hours of WWE/TNA this week.
Next week…..will ROH finally release the hostages from the Du Burns Arena? Also, Edwards vs. Strong for a title shot! Tune in!
