[Cliffsnotes]

First Card:

Xtreme Hardcore Wrestling (XHW) presents:

Battle Rumble!
From Madison Square Garden
Announcers: Jerry The King Lawler and Michael Cole and Andy Kaufman
Backstage Interviewer: Mean Gene Okerlund
Ring Announcer: Michael Buffer

Main Event: Battle Rumble. Eight men start in the ring. Every 90 seconds a new wrestler enters. To be eliminated, you go over the top rope and have any body part touch the floor. The 30 Wrestlers (in no particular order). Winner earns the vacated XHW Hardcore Belt (the top belt in the XHW federation!)

1. 1998 Undertaker
2. Mankind
3. The Fiend Bray Wyatt
4. The New Day’s Big E
5. The New Day’s Kofi Kingston
6. NWO Scott Hall
7. NWO Kevin Nash
8. NWO Hollywood Hogan
9. NWO Syxx
10. Corporate Kane
11. Sexual Chocolate Mark Henry
12. Dominick Mysterio
13. Rybaxel’s Ryback
14. Rybaxel’s Curtis Axel
15. NWO Dennis Rodman
16. Omos
17. Bad Bunny
18. Mike Tyson
19. Mr T
20. Baron Corbin
21. Hornswoggle
22. El Torito
23. Santino Marella
24. Al Snow
25. Erick Rowan
26. Nikolai Volkoff
27. Tyson Fury
28. Floyd Mayweather Jr
29. Dick The Bruiser
30. The Great Khali


Xtreme Pro Wrestling (The NXT of XHW) Title Belt Match:
Sgt Slaughter (Champion) vs Iron Sheikh (Challenger)

Hellfire Match – Household items to be placed around the ring to be used as weapons:
Alexa Bliss vs Kaitlyn

[Cliffsnotes]

XHW Battle Rumble Early Results:

NWO Hollywood Hogan wins the Battle Rumble, and is the NEW XHW Hardcore Champion! NWO Shenanigans helped Hogan win the Battle Rumble. More details to follow.

Alexa Bliss wins the Hellfire Match. However, there was some trash talking with special guest announcer Andy Kaufman...

Sgt Slaughter retains vs Iron Sheikh

[Cliffsnotes]

Card #2:

XHW Presents:

Power Balls!

From Madison Square Garden

Announcers: Jerry The King Lawler and Michael Cole

Backstage Interviewer: Mean Gene Okerlund

Ring Announcer: Michael Buffer



Main Event:

XHW Hardcore Championship Match:

Hollywood Hogan (Champion) accompanied by Mr. T vs The Undertaker accompanied by Paul Bearer



XHW World Wide Championship Match:

Dick The Bruiser (Champion) vs Cactus Jack



The Unstoppable Force vs The Immovable Object:

Mark Henry (The World’s Strongest Man) vs The Fiend Bray Wyatt (The World’s Scariest Wrestler)



The New Day (Big E and Kofi Kingston) vs. NWO (Kevin Nash and Scott Hall)



Steel Cage Match: Must win by Knockout

Mike Tyson vs Tyson Fury



A Moment of Bliss:

Alexa Bliss interviews Andy Kaufman



Dominick Mysterio vs Great Khali



Dennis Rodman and Hornswoggle vs NWO Syxx and El Torito



Preshow:

Kane (The Big Red Machine) vs Omos

[Cliffsnotes]

Power Balls! Results:

Main Event:
XHW Hardcore Championship Match:

Hollywood Hogan (Champion) accompanied by Mr. T vs The Undertaker accompanied by Paul Bearer

Undertaker tombstones Hogan from the top of the Titantron and knocks Hogan unconscious to win the XHW Hardcore Title.


XHW World Wide Championship Match:

Dick The Bruiser (Champion) vs Cactus Jack

Cactus Jack wins by pinfall.


The Unstoppable Force vs The Immovable Object:

Mark Henry (The World’s Strongest Man) vs The Fiend Bray Wyatt (The World’s Scariest Wrestler)

Mark Henry wins by breaking The Fiend's nose and then finishing him with the World's Strongest Slam and World's Strongest Splash.



The New Day (Big E and Kofi Kingston) vs. NWO (Kevin Nash and Scott Hall)

NWO wins by pinning Kofi.


Steel Cage Match: Must win by Knockout

Mike Tyson vs Tyson Fury

Mike Tyson wins by raking Tyson Fury's face against the Steel Cage, and follows up with a single punch to knock out Tyson Fury in 38 seconds.


A Moment of Bliss:

Alexa Bliss interviews Andy Kaufman.

Andy Kaufman outrageously claims that he is Lexi "Alexa Bliss" Kaufman's father! And that she is an embarrassment to the Kaufman name. Andy will not rest until Lexi is humiliated!



Dominick Mysterio vs Great Khali

Floyd Mayweather Jr distracts the ref and cheap shots Khali, allowing Dominick to upset Khali!


Dennis Rodman and Hornswoggle vs NWO Syxx and El Torito

Rodman and Hornswoggle win by DQ after Syxx illegally hits Hornswoggle.

Preshow:

Kane (The Big Red Machine) vs Omos

Lots of offense and no-selling. Kane wears down Omos and wins.

[Cliffsnotes]

Card #3:

XHW Presents: The Deathly Hallows!

From Madison Square Garden

Announcers: Jerry The King Lawler and Michael Cole
Backstage Interviewer: Mean Gene Okerlund
Ring Announcer: Michael Buffer


Main Event:
XHW Hardcore Chamionship Match
Undertaker (Champion) vs Kofi Kingston vs Big E

XHW World Wide Championship Match:
Cactus Jack vs Hollywood Hogan

Bray Wyatt vs Baron Corbin

Diesel vs Razor Ramon

Intergender Match:
Andy Kaufman vs “Alexa Bliss” Lexi Kaufman

Dominick Mysterio vs Dennis Rodman

Dick The Bruiser vs Great Khali

Ryback vs Curtis Axel Winner keeps the Tag Team Belts and chooses a new partner.

Pre Show:
Battle Royal for a Championship Match: X-Pac, Corporate Kane, Omos, Mark Henry, Mike Tyson, Iron Sheikh, Erick Rowan, Tyson Fury, Al Snow.

[Cliffsnotes]

RESULTS!!!!

Card #3:

XHW Presents: The Deathly Hallows!

Main Event:
XHW Hardcore Chamionship Match
Undertaker (Champion) vs Kofi Kingston vs Big E

Big E and Kofi work together to take down the Undertaker. Big E hits a superkick on Kofi and a Big Ending to turn heel! Big E pins Kofi and is your NEW XHW Hardcore Champion!


XHW World Wide Championship Match:
Cactus Jack vs Hollywood Hogan

Cactus Jack retains by slamming Hogan through a wooden desk wrapped with barbed wire.


Bray Wyatt vs Baron Corbin

Wyatt wins by Sister Abigail


Diesel vs Razor Ramon

Diesel wins when he ducks out of the way of a top rope splash by Razor Ramon, and cover Razor for the pin. Diesel uses the ropes for leverage on the pin.


Intergender Match:
Andy Kaufman vs “Alexa Bliss” Lexi Kaufman

After a number of slaps and reversals, Andy Kaufman rolls out of the ring and yells at Lexi, at the ref, at the crowd, at the announcers, and at the guy selling cotton candy. Jerry Lawler has enough, and smashes a monitor over Andy's head, and throws him back into the ring! Lexi finishes him off and pins Andy.


Dominick Mysterio vs Dennis Rodman

Dominick wins by faking an injury and Dennis is sentenced to the XHW Court.


Dick The Bruiser vs Great Khali

Great Khali wins. Dick the Bruiser disagrees and starts a riot. Policemen and members of the crowd are injured. State of New York bans Dick The Bruiser from competing in New York ever again!


Ryback vs Curtis Axel Winner keeps the Tag Team Belts and chooses a new partner.

Ryback wins. He selects Mark Henry as his new partner.



Pre Show:
Battle Royal for a Championship Match: X-Pac, Corporate Kane, Omos, Mark Henry, Mike Tyson, Iron Sheikh, Erick Rowan, Tyson Fury, Al Snow.

Omos wins. He earns a title match, which as we learn later this evening, is against the new champion Big E!